A Lampent's Lament in Equestria

by Iridescence T Wind

Winter is coming and Village Drunk

As it turns out not only the castle but Ponyville as well had to be reconstructed, an act that took up the entire fall leading up into the start of winter. Now with it only a few days away and Soul was out searching for something to do as the Masons worked on the castle. He had already tried to help once before and the result was turning a third of the ruins into rubble. There wasn't much to begin with but he was still felt guilty from accidently increasing their workloads. Instead he looked out for more cases like Steven magnet to help populate the castle, or Homestead as they were starting to call it. So far with no success sadly however once Steven had set up shop they had attracted a Large Earth stallion called Red Wood. The stallion was a friend of Stevens apparently. While he didn't talk much his actions more than spoke for himself. Early on Applejack had met the stallion and both she and Soul had looked in shock at his method of taking down trees.

Unlike most ponies that would use an axe, Red wood would simply buck the trees out of the ground roots and all before tying a rope around it and dragging it away to the workshop he had set up next to the eccentric sea serpent. The Lumberjack would then practice his wood working for the rest of the evening, often churning out a wooden statue of somepony he had seen or a random piece of furniture or a tool. It wasn't a week before ponies regularly came to him for all his wood working goods. Over time Applejack would visit Red more and more often with the lack of farming due to the incoming winter season. The two got along quite well remarkably.

He was wandering Ponyville greeting various ponies as he went on through the streets in the early evening three days before winter began before his next adventure would begin. The nearby tavern, labeled "The Drunken Apple" had recently went out of business from a combination of Competition, a lower in prices for hard Apple cider, and an apparent rumor that the owner had been hospitalized a while ago and by the time she had returned to business her monthly taxes had all but bankrupted the pony involved. Outside of the tavern he looked around, ignoring the sign that said condemned he knocked twice on the door. No response, not even window lighting up. Looking left then right Soul checked the alleyway next to the locked Tavern. Sure enough, there was a slouched form of an equine leaning on a wall with several bottles of booze next to her.

"Excuse me?" Soul said aloud earning no response from the slouched figure who took another swig of the bottle, "Are you the pony they refer to as 'Berry Punch'?"

"Who," she hiced, "wants to know? Another ga-" She hiced again, "-te crasher to the failure of my pub?"

"No rather the opposite actually." Soul stated, not recognizing the apple cider as an alcoholic beverage but rather the attitude, "Are you drunk?"

"Luna's right flank I am!" The drunken berry colored earth pony replied getting up, several more of the empty bottles around her being seen, "Got a problem with that?" she challenged.

"No rather, I had a proposition if you’re willing to think about it. Though I might come back later instead if your one of those who forgets everything that had happened when you were drunk."

"I am perfectly able to remember everything I do when I am drunk as well as the back of my hoof!" She stated, gesturing with her hoof before staring at the back of it and questioning vaguely, "Hey that’s new."

"Right. Anyway I was wondering since you seemed out of work would you like to start a new tavern at the Homestead up in the Everfree? I heard you have quite the knack of brewing spirits." Soul didn't know what brewing was but he knew what a Spirit was.

A soul of the dead right? If somepony could brew those then he could ease up a bit on his collection duty or get his job easier. Sometimes he would need the extra kick a departed soul would give him in combat. No telling when trouble could stir and a boost would be appreciated if something larger came around that he couldn't handle. With all the dragon and Ursa major caves around the forests in Ponyville he was surprised it hadn't been destroyed yet by a grumpy dragon or a wandering Ursa Major. While he doubted a single spirit would even the odds every bit helped in his view. Her response however wasn't expected, "Only if you three do me a favor."

Three what? There was only him in front of her, "Okay... what did you want me to do?"

It was unexpected somepony would want him to do something before they would accept a new lodging. Berry punch took another swig and started her own speech in a drunken slur mixed with anger, "Some ponies owe meh' a bar tab they haven't repayed. Most of 'em are wannabe bandits who do nothing actually evil but minor thefts and debts. It adds up though over time. Acquire my sum of 50 silver bits from them and I'll join ya Home-stead-whatsis."

"Where exactly do I find them then?" Soul asked agreeing to her request.

"Just south of White-tail woods, ye'd find 'em in a stone cottage. Don't look like the houses from 'round 'ere. If you really get lost, just follow the mini-map!"

"Mini-what?" Soul asked confused.

"Ya know, the mini map, hangs out around the top right or bottom left of the screen. Tells ya where ponies need ja help?"

Soul stared at her blankly, "Ah never mind, if you’re really curious about such things ask pinkie or Lyra. Both of them know what I am talkin' about," Berry finished with another drink of the bottle cheering it towards a wall in front of her to Souls confusion.

Maybe she was the kind of drunk that got insane when intensely drunk, he wasn't going to stick around to find out but neither could he just leave the drunken pony to the street alleyway, his mind quickly thought of a solution but he hoped that it would work, "Well berry, let’s find you a temporary stay while I get your issue resolved, agreed?"

"What-eva ya silly six eyed lamp thingy."

Soul floated over and grabbed the pony from under her forelegs, lifting the earth pony off the ground with a heavy effort. Luckily Twilights tree of a house wasn't far away, though he was still was tired after the workout. He couldn't just mentally lift everything all the time and carrying eighty pounds of deadweight two to three hundred yards was still a decent weight. He sighed as he reached the front door, hoping Twilight would still be here rather than off with a friend on yet another adventure. Unluckily it was Spike the baby dragon who answered, "Heya Soul."

"Hi spike..." Soul said with a slight groan, "Is Twilight in?"

This drunk was still almost four times heavier than he was after all, and he carefully put Berry Punch down. Spike nodded looking curiously from Soul to the pony who was now singing a song about beers on the wall quietly, "Why is berry punch acting like that?"

"The reason I am here, unfortunately. I really need to speak to Twilight. Alone, if that is okay."

Soul raised an eyebrow, "Alright, she’s in the study. Planning on staying for dinner? Always room for one more"

"Not... Exactly. Thanks for the offer though." Soul nodded to spike before heaving the drunken mess of a Berry punch back onto his back and dragging her upstairs to Twilights study and bedroom.

Spike stared at the scene wondering briefly what was wrong with Berry Punch before moving back to the kitchen to cook dinner. Tonight would be mashed potatoes and cucumber salad he decided.

Twilight was reading a book in her study. Judging from the larger pile to her right she had been reading for quite a while. Not really that strange when he thought about the mares obsession with the things. So he coughed once to draw her attention, only to fail miserably. He remembered a trick Applejack had showed him one time when they both came in to introduce her to Red Wood not so long ago. He bumped an inkpot on her desk disorganizing it with a clank. The response was instant, Twilight fell backward out of her pillow of a chair with a little exclamation in surprise. The book she was reading fell onto her chest as if hugging her, no longer coated in her magic field to hold it up any more in the air. Sheepishly she grinned at Soul upside-down, "Oh hi Soul. What brings you here?"

Soul shrugged off Berry punch again, who was now knocked into a Drunken stupor of unconsciousness. Gesturing to her Soul politely began, "Berry here is out of house and home, I was hoping you wouldn't mind... um... housing her in a guest room while I do her request? She said I had to collect some tavern debts from some ponies who owed them to her before she would move into the Homestead."

"Hm, alright." Twilight responded quite calmly, "Though why is she passed out?"

"She’s drunk." Soul stated with an unamused stare at the intoxicated Berry, "Kind of the reason I went to you rather than leave her. Got a spell for removing that?"

Twilight shook her head in a negative, "I don't have any spells like that. I can see if there is one though. Just leave her here."

"Thank you Twilight." Soul nodded to her and turned to leave, before pausing, "Do you need any help tomorrow with anything?"

"Nope, everything’s already been organized for the winter. Thanks for asking though."

Soul nodded and left, setting his path towards the whitetail woods.

The house itself couldn't be marked more plainly or more noticeably. Above the simple wooden hut was a series of bright neon signs pointing to it and a giant sign bigger than the house if two of the hut was stacked up reading, The Fantastic Revolution!

Soul looked at the hut unamused, he knocked on it three times before a slit opened on the door showing a quizzical green eye surrounded with dark grey fur looked at him, "Password?" a nasally voice questioned in the space of half a second.

Soul resisted the urge to roll his yellow orbs, "I am here to collect a debt for Berry Punch the former tavern keeper. She says you still owe her fifty silver bits."

"That's not the password."

Shut went the slide and utter silence followed. Again soul knocked for the same pony to ask again with the following slide of the eye visor, "What's the password?"

"I don't know. I just want to collect the debt owed to Berry Punch."

"Wrong," again the visor shut with a satisfied click.

soul sighed, "Just what are you guys revolting from anyway."

The doors visor opened yet again, "You don't know? I was under the impression everypony had heard. Then again you’re not a pony and you’re interested so..."

Soul raised a metallic limb to respond for a mismatch of five different ponies rushed out of the door, grabbed him, and dragged him inside before he could respond. He found himself in a well lit room in front of a messy blackboard that was mounted on a simple rotating stand as the same grey stallion, a Pegasus from his wings and recognizable as the only one with the same grey fur color. The leader, also from how everypony else sat down while he remained standing began, "We 'The Fantastic Revolution' are those who saw through the clever political ploys and schemes that the government has created."

Soul raised his eye brow as the Pegasus continued, "For example isn't it odd that Discord, the Crystal Empire, and Nightmare moon all happened all almost a thousand years ago, with Nightmare moon signaling Celestia's solo reign of this nation and the complete lack of technology being discovered since?"

"Not reall-" Soul began before he was interrupted.

"Technology has been the same for over a thousand years!" the Pegasus proclaimed, "Not one war or multicultural change has happened since. In fact if this nation was attacked, I doubt the plastic the royal guard calls armor would go down in a heartbeat."

The stallion took a deep breath in before continuing, "that’s why we have developed a plan to fix the situation."

"A plan?" Soul asked half curious to what it was.

"Yes, we are going to sneak into the palace." the leader stalwartly proclaimed.

"And then!" several of the others, a unicorn, two earth ponies and another Pegasus joined in.

"We are going to access Celestias royal quarters."

"And then!" they all but shouted again.

"We are going to do the most dastardly thing we can think of to get her to stop ruling the country."

"Which is what exactly." Soul questioned.

The leader of the group gave a coy grin and slammed a hoof on the bottom of the blackboard causing the large board to spin over to its other side while dropping its chalk and eraser showing the picture of their master plan. "A cake?" Soul asked, confused.

"Not just any cake, cloud cake." The Pegasus went on, "A particular favorite of the tyrant. We will smash it with a hammer in front of her if she doesn’t comply with what we ask. Perfectly legal mind you."

"We have already looked into acquiring the cake." the earth pony next to soul stated happily.

"Right... Can I just get the bits owed to Berry Punch now?"

"Oh about that, if you want those bits you’re going to have to do us a favor first."

Soul lit a flame on one arm, he knew where this was going. They were going to send him on a quest for another item that would lead into another item and so on. He had read it before, seen it before, and had to do it before in another world. Nervously the leader smiled, and wordlessly they came to an agreement of just handing over the owed bits and the place wouldn't be burnt to the ground.

Soul left and the leader resumed his plotting pulling out elaborate maps for such a simple torture of a loss of a cake for the probably misjudged princess. Last Soul checked, Princess Celestia wasn't a glutton if her student was an indicator. Meanwhile it was getting late, he would return to Twilight and Berry Punch in the morning... Tiredly, Soul flew towards his room, dark purple and themed in the same color schemes as he was himself. He didn't need sleep. Rather it was a habit that took up some of the hours of the night was to ponder over his thoughts and meditate or read a book. Opening a book at random from a bookshelf that decorated the wall next to his bed (largely in thanks to Twilight for repairing and sending them back as well as a healthy variety of textbooks for casual reading).

Flipping to a random page of the book he began to read aloud to himself, "Of the many fearsome beasts and monsters that roam our land, there is none more curious or more deadly than the Basilisk, known also as the King of Serpents. This snake, which may reach gigantic size, and live many hundreds of years, is born from a chicken's egg," Soul stopped and considered for a moment before continuing on curious himself over this beast, "hatched beneath a toad. Its methods of killing are most wondrous, for aside from its deadly and venomous fangs, the Basilisk has a murderous stare, and all who are fixed with the beam of its eye shall suffer instant death. Spiders flee before the Basilisk, for it is their mortal enemy, and the Basilisk flees only from the crowing of the rooster, which is fatal to it."

Soul read on for several more entries on the mysterious snake like creature. Soon enough the beginning of the sun was shining yet again. Soul shut his bed, while the book went over the various species of animals that could paralyze, Kill, or even petrify other beings who looked them in the eye. It failed to mention one creature that wasn't 'Run away on sight.' Pointless advice if a stare could end up getting you killed to begin with. Maybe he would ask Twilight about it when it was time to pick up Berry Punch.