//------------------------------//
// Playing With Matches 
// Story: Timed Ramblings 
// by Midnight herald 
//------------------------------//

	All those stories about Rainbow Dash liking mares made sense now. Not that that was a bad thing, really. And honestly, Scootaloo wasn’t worried about that. It was Rainbow Dash, so they were cool, true or not. What didn’t make sense was how many stories there weren’t about other mares liking mares. But it was pretty obvious, now that the Crusaders were running around Ponyville like a bunch of crazy... Were they crazy? Probably, but so were Rainbow Dash and her friends, so that made it okay. Who would face down unmentionable evils without a second thought but a bunch of crazies? Anyways, the reason everything was coming together was pretty scary, in a looking-at-your-future kinda way. The fact was, stallions in Ponyville were weird. Too weird for Ms. Cheerilee, anyhow. She was the best teacher ever, and she really deserved the best very special somepony they could find her.

After all, she was a pretty lonely mare. Or at least, that’s what Sweetie had said, and Sweetie’s sister was Rarity, who was, like, the town expert in romance. So of course, since Sweetie talked to Rarity all the time, she had to be at least the second-best pony at knowing that kind of mushy stuff. But since Ms. Cheerilee was always so busy being a great teacher and grading their homework and stuff, she was probably too busy to find one herself. And that’s where the Crusaders came in.

But the stallions around here were just so weird. Everywhere they looked, the weirdest, grossest stuff showed its weird, gross head … figuredly speaking, of course. Ms. Cheerilee couldn’t nuzzle a kid or a grandpa; that would be weird. And probably against the rules, somewhere. At least, that’s what Auntie Raindrops had told her once. And every foal knew how much Ms. Cheerilee couldn’t stand germs. Or mud. Well, not too much mud, anyways. It wasn’t like she was a neat freak or anything. Was it too much to be ask for a normal stallion in this town?

Of course it was. The mares who weren’t busy being the best teacher ever had grabbed them all beforehand. Scootaloo blew a frustrated raspberry at one couple in particular. What were they doing, being all mushy like that in public? I bet they can’t write a quiz worth a darn, she thought. They think they’re so good with their picnic and their nuzzling... Ms. Cheerilee could do better than that.

But the more she thought about it, the more she could understand why a mare might go for other mares in this town, although Sweetie was dead set on a boyfriend for their teacher. And she was the best of the three of them at this, for obvious reasons. With all the craziness going around today like some kind of plague... Was it contagious? Was that what cooties did? 

They ran into the king of crazy, right offsides of Sugarcube corner. Seriously, a stallion who had nothing better to do than bathe in huge jars of otherwise delicious jelly? Did he know how many mornings of toast he was destroying for his perverse pleasure?

As they plodded back to Sweet Apple Acres, out of luck, a beacon of hope shone out. Apple Bloom’s brother wasn’t too weird. And he had to be cool, or else how could he have a sister like Apple Bloom?

“Doing anything special for Hearts and Hooves Day?” she asked, casual and suave. He’d never see this coming. He’d never guess their awesome plans. 

Against all hope, against all odds, they waited …. “Eenope!”

They’d done it. They’d found the perfect stallion. Now to plan a way to show the two of them exactly how awesome they could be together. If it takes this much work to find a Very Special Somepony, you can count me out, that’s for sure.