//------------------------------// // Getting Familiar with their Homes // Story: Dang O' Ponies, I Tell You What // by LtMajorDude //------------------------------// Twilight's Library Hank Hill looked around the library amazed. "You have so many books here." he said to Twilight and Spike with a smile. Twilight smiled. "Thanks, so Applejack said you had a narrow urethra" she said with an amused look. Hank blushed and gritted her teeth. "She told you that?" he grumbled. Twilight giggled. "Don't worry. I won't tell anypony" she promised. "So what did you do on 'Earth' Mr. Hill?" Spike asked. Hank smiled proudly and said boldly: "I sell propane and propane accessories" Spike frowned and scratched his head. "What's propane?" he asked. Hank dropped his mouth. A world that doesn't know anything about propane. Twilight took out a book on Pony Mythology. She turned to the index page. "Maybe this book will say something about 'propane.' It's P-R-O-P-A-N-E right?" Hank sighed and sat down disappointed. "Yep" he said in a melancholy tone. He closed his eyes and thought how much he was gonna miss propane. "Oh! Here it is. Propane!" Twilight told Hank. He opened his eyes and gasped. "PROPANE?-!" he gasped. He jumped up and looked at the book Twilight had. Twilight turned to the propane section of the 'gases' chapter. Hank hoped it had enough propane information. Sure enough, it did have a lot information about propane. Hank found a section on where he can get propane. The only problem he's good at selling propane, not finding propane naturally. "Eh" Hank thought. "I'll figure that out later..." Twilight and Spike looked at him. Hank smiled. "I'll go right now!" he said before looking at he clock to see what time is it. "Umm...I mean, first thing tomorrow." Hank scratched the back of his head, "Um, can you show me to my room?" he asked Twilight. "Sure thing." she said with a smile. After Twilight showed Hank his room, he lied on his bed. "Sweet Lady Propane, here I come." he sighed with a grin. Rainbow Dash's House Dale was amazed by Rainbow Dash's home. He thought she would live in a house in the ground, not a house up in the sky! She smiled. "What do you think?" she asked. "Looks pretty cool" Dale said. "I would have liked my old home up in the sky, away from the government." She raised an eyebrow. "Government?" Dale sighed. "Yep. You don't want to know." Rainbow Dash couldn't help but ask: "So, what do you do for a living?" Dale smiled. "Exterminator. I kill insects and rodents, like rats and cockroaches" Rainbow Dash looked nervous. "You mean like umm...animals?" Dale smirked. "Yep! squirrels, skunks, hell you name it...except ponies, of course." Rainbow Dash coughed uncomfortably. She knew Fluttershy wouldn't approve this. "What do you do for a living?" Dale asked. "I work at the weather factory" Rainbow Dash answered. Dale looked surprised. "Pegasus ponies can control the weather?" he asked. Rainbow Dash nodded. Dale was even more amazed. "I have GOT to learn how to do that." he muttered. Rainbow Dash giggled. "It's not so hard really" she admitted. "So what are you gonna do for work? I mean, the ponies here don't have animal problems. And one of my friends LOVES animals." There was a long silence. Dale broke the silence. "I have no idea..." he said stupidly. Rainbow Dash smiled. "I can ask my boss if you can work there." Dale smiled brightly. "Thanks Rainbow Dash!" Eventually, Dale yawned. "I might as well rest for a bit" he muttered. Rainbow Dash showed Dale his room. She was gonna enjoy having him in her home. Sugar Cube Corner Bill and Pinkie Pie both walked in, wide grins on their faces. Bill asked. "So, your aunt and uncle, Mr. and Mrs. Cake, home?" Pinkie giggled. "YEP! Waitaminute. How did you know about them?" Bill chuckled at her. "Trust me, if I tell you, you would just end up like Twilight that one time you had the 'Pinkie Sense,' remember?" She began to jump around, giggling. "Oh yeah! I remember!" Bill scratched his head. "Long story short, my secret." he said. Pinkie Pie smiled. "OH! I LOVE SECRETS!-!-!" Bill smiled happily. Right next to Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie was also his favorite pony. Eventually they headed to the bakery. There, Pinkie's aunt and uncle, Mr. and Mrs. Cake are there, along with their twins Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake. "Hi Pinkie." Mr. Cake greeted. "Who's your friend?" Bill waved his hoof. "Hello. My name is William Fontaine de la Tour D'Haute Rive. You can call me Bill." He knelt down and patted Pound Cake's head. "You have such cute children Mr. and Mrs. Cake." Mrs. Cake smiled. "Why thank you." Pinkie came up to Bill and hugged him. "Hey guys guess what. Bill is from another planet. And he knows a lot about us! EVERYPONY!-!-!" The Cakes just stood there, blinking. Bill just shrugged and smiled. Pinkie gave the Cakes her puppy eyes. "Can he PLE-E-E-E-ASE stay here?" she asked. Mr. Cake sat there thinking. "Umm..." Bill smiled. "If you want..." he said. "I can help you around the bakery. It's the least I can do!" Mrs. Cake smiled. "Sure he can stay here" "YIPIIEE!" both Pinkie Pie and Bill shouted happily. Pinkie giggled and quickly dragged him to his room. Bill smiled and chuckled to himself. "Thanks again, Pinkie Pie" he said. "AND THANK YOU MR. AND MRS. CAKE!-!-!" Pinkie smiled. "No problem! And please, call me Pinkie" she said. She left the room, knowing that she is gonna enjoy having him stay over. Carousel Boutique After Rarity and her little sister Sweetie Belle showed Boomhauer around, he spoke up. "I tell you wat man, nice dresses man, looks like Ross, or something" Sweetie Belle looked confused. "Do you always talk like this?" she asked. "Dang o' talk like what, man? I always talk this yo" he muttered with a confused look. Rarity shrugged. "Oh well, thanks for the compliment though. Even though you're just saying that..." Boomhauer shook his head. "I tell you what man no lies dang o' swear the truth man yo God be my witness" Rarity blushed while Sweetie Belle asked, "Mr. Boomhauer can I ask you a question?" "Yo" Boomhauer said with a reply. "Where's your Cutie Mark?" Sweetie Belle asked. Boomhauer coughed. "Well you know darling I tell you time don't take from me man. You know life's too short man. You don't want to pay attention to these things all the time forever man. Let it come when it comes you man. Talkin' 'bout let ol' bygones be bygones man. I tell you what man, dang o' I don't know where's my Cutie Mark man yo" Sweetie Belle frowned. "Oh" she said. "Why don't you fix up Mr. Boomhauer's room, Sweetie Belle?" Rarity asked. Sweetie Belle nodded, "Sure thing." she said while going in the attic. "So what did you do on Earth and um...your real name?" Rarity asked Boomhauer. Boomhauer cleared his throat. "Hey you can just go ahead and call me Boomhauer man you know dang o' it don't, last name no one's you know dang o' done a lot of different things you know had a job back there man company settlement I get uh work's comp too man you know it's tax free man" he explained. She stood there confused. "OK..." she said. Boomhauer nodded. "Yo man" he muttered. Rarity spoke up. "I prefer LADY" she said with a stern look. "Dang o' sure whatever" he muttered. Rarity couldn't help but blush as she showed him to his room. Sweet Apple Acres "Well, here we are!" Applejack shouted. Cotton smirked. "Damn! You harvest this place yerself?" Applejack grinned nervously. She didn't like to talk about the time she tried to harvest the whole orchard by herself. "Um, no. Sometimes mah big brother helps me. Oh look! There he is now wit mah family!" A big red stallion, a small yellow filly, and an elderly green mare walked towards Applejack and Cotton. "Hey everypony! I want y'all to meet mah new friend, Mr. Cotton Hill!" Applejack said while pointing to Cotton Cotton coughed. "Call me Cotton. i don't like that Mr. stuff" "There's here mah lil' sis, AppleBloom" Applejack said pointing to the small yellow filly. "Howdy!" AppleBloom greeted. "Say, why don't you have yer Cutie Mark?" Applejack rolled her eyes. "AppleBloom..." Applejack muttered. AppleBloom grinned nervously, "Just asking..." she said. Applejack pointed to the elderly green mare. "This here's mah granny, Granny Smith." Granny Smith held her hoof for a shake. "Greetings!" she said. "Not everyday I see a pony about mah age." Cotton looked at her hoof and then at her, with a raised eyebrow. Granny Smith put down her hoof. "Not the shaking hooves kind, I see" she said. Applejack pointed to the large red stallion. "And finally, mah big brother Big Macintosh. Along with me, he does most of the farm work, surprisingly good! Right, Big Macintosh?" Big Macintosh smiled. "Eeyup" he said. Cotton frowned and narrowed his eyes at Big Macintosh. Cotton heard his son's friends do that "Yup" thing in the alley back in Earth. He had a feeling Big Macintosh was gonna be another Hank. "At least he doesn't work in a gas station," Cotton thought. Cotton slowly raised his hoof towards Big Macintosh. Cotton had a stern look. "Nice to meet you..." he muttered. Big Macintosh gave a confused look, but shook Cotton's hoof. "Um, same to you?" he said. Applejack, unaware of Cotton's look on his face, smiled. "I bet y'all will get along jus' fine!" she said. Cotton narrowed his eyes more and whispered: "Yeah. Just FINE" Big Macintosh grinned weakly. "I suppose yer staying here?" he asked. Cotton nodded slowly. "Yeah, if ya want, i can help you-I mean-yer sister wit some of the farm work..." Granny Smith smiled. "What a gentlepony!" she said. AppleBloom smiled. "Care to join us for dinner?" she asked. Cotton shrugged. "Sure," he replied, hoping to be seated away from Big Macintosh. Fluttershy's Cottage "Um we're here" Fluttershy said nervously. Kahn was surprised at the animals at her cottage. "Man, you have a truckload of animals here!" Fluttershy smiled. She'll take that as a compliment. Kahn looked happy. That is, until, he realized something. "I'm in a home with animals." he thought. "A house with animals, like redneck homes. If Hank Hill had all sorts of animals, he would be Larry the Cable Guy or something. And, yet, I don't think of Fluttershy as a redneck. But, then again, she is pretty nice and pretty cute..." Kahn eyes widen. "CUTE?-! What the hell did I just thought?-!" he thought, "What about Minh...and Connie?-!-?-!" "Um are you OK?" Fluttershy asked noticing Kahn's shocked state. Kahn shook his head and smiled his best. "Sorry. Just thinking about um...something." he said with a nervous smile. Fluttershy smiled sweetly until she noticed a white bunny poking her leg. When she turned to the bunny, the bunny pointed to Kahn. Kahn snarled. "Who are YOU pointing at?" he whispered. The bunny glared at him while Fluttershy patted the bunny's head and said, "This is my pet rabbit, Angel." Kahn glared at Angel and whispered, "What a cute bunny..." Angel stuck his tongue out and walked away. Kahn rolled his eyes. "So, um, can you show me my room...uh please?" he asked Fluttershy. Fluttershy smiled and nodded. "Sure thing" she said. She showed him to his room. "Thanks," Kahn said. "You're welcome," Fluttershy said as she left the room. Kahn smiled. He was gonna enjoy having her around here. "Ugh, stop it," Kahn thought as he lied on his bed. "Remember that you're still married to Minh...and don't forget about that stupid rabbit..." Twilight's Library Midnight Hank lied on his bed with a worried look. "My friends, Dad, and Kahn are here..." he whispered. "but what about Peggy, Bobby, and some other people I know?" Hank yawned. "Oh well. I bet they're OK" he said while closing his eyes. Hank had no trouble sleeping.