Rarity was an unconventional mare. Whereas anypony else would have hung a bell above the door to their shop to signify the arrival of a customer, she instead had a small wooden box. It was painted and varnished to blend in seamlessly with the wall it was mounted upon, though anypony looking up after crossing the threshold of Carousel Boutique’s front door would notice it. And many did, for when one entered, no simple chime sounded. Rather, an automated magical message would play, delivered directly into said customer’s head.
Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where everything is chic, unique, and magnifique!
Rarity was immensely proud of the device, as was Twilight Sparkle, who had personally enchanted it. They, however, were mostly alone in that sentiment, for most everypony else found it intensely disturbing to have Rarity’s melodic voice mercilessly penetrate their brains, both on arrival and departure. River fell into that second group, though her reaction wasn’t a polite complaint, but rather to snap her teeth together and wince like she was receiving a root canal sans anesthesia, and then gasping like she had just escaped from shark-infested waters.
“What the fu—”
Rarity’s impeccably groomed mane became visible from the door of her “inspiration room” before her face did. True her exotic greeting did nothing to alert her of when a customer arrived, but they usually vocalized it for her convenience — inadvertently and often paired with several expletives. “Ah, River, dear!” Standing up, she entered the show floor and approached her guest. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
River shuttered once more, trying to shove the feeling of being violated from her mind. “Um… I… I have something for you.” The pinions of River’s right wing spread and pierced the lip of her saddlebag’s flap, demonstrating her ever-evolving dexterity. Success was not found on the first try, or even the second, but Rarity said nothing, content to watch and maintain a pleasant smile. She knew River was struggling to become acquainted with not just Equestrian society, but her own body, and she was more than willing to exercise patience with the poor pegasus.
After nearly a minute of fumbling with her bag and cursing under her breath, River finally managed to undo the buckle and lift the flap. She reached in with her mouth and produced a small burlap sack bulging with bits, which she released once she was certain Rarity’s magical field had a firm “grip”. The shimmering blue field jingled a few times to get a sense for the bag’s contents, and though Rarity knew it was money, she wasn’t sure what it was for.
“Did you want to buy something, dear?”
“I already did. You fixed my clothes when I first arrived.”
Rarity thought back several months to an eloquent letter hoof-written by Twilight but dictated by Riven, standing in stark contrast to the orange biohazard bag that her torn and bloody clothing had been bundled up in. Rarity’s eyes widened in realization. “Oh, River, this is unnecessary! Those garments were ruined!”
Holding up a hoof, River interrupted her friend. The unicorn’s generosity was legendary and River had already become acquainted with it. Though she spent most of her time with Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle, and Pinkie Pie made a concerted effort to become her “bestest friend for life ever”, River couldn’t help but feel the strongest bond of kinship with Rarity. Though they enjoyed vastly different hobbies, their personalities complimented one another famously.
“You spent time and materials on those repairs and deserve to be paid for it.”
“This is like asking me to make a profit on a funeral gown!” Rarity’s telekinetic grip on the bag faded and the bits sank to the polished marble floor with a loud clank. “I refuse to accept your money, River, and short of forcing it into my register—”
River shrugged and picked up the bag with her teeth. She began a slow, teasing trot toward Rarity’s check-out counter, and the aforementioned bit register.
“Don’t you dare!”
River found this small prank far more enjoyable than Rainbow Dash’s gregarious practical jokes. Her face didn’t betray her amusement, however, even after she dropped the bag on the counter top and hovered her hoof over the button on the register which would eject the drawer.
“River, I am warning you—”
The drawstring was pulled loose with River’s teeth, causing the folds of the bag to droop and threaten to spill some of its contents.
“This is your last warning!”
Standing on her hind hooves, River scooped up the bag and upended it over the drawer, spilling exactly fifty bits into its confines.
Rarity was fuming; literally a shade of crimson that would have made Big McIntosh jealous. When the drawer closed and the internal flag flipped up to acknowledge the sale, Rarity cried out in frustration. “Fine then!” She said with a dramatic stomp of her hooves. “I will make you something new on account of you wasting your hard-earned money on absolutely nothing!”
“I thought you might say that,” River said with a demure grin. Rarity sighed but couldn’t help but bare the tiniest hint of a smile as well. “I was hoping you would make me an outfit.”
“You didn’t have to torment me with rivaling charity, dear,” the white mare said with a cute pout. “Just asking goes a long way.”
“I know, but it was funny, and I wanted to pay you in advance.”
Rarity smiled wider now. She was quickly growing to admire and appreciate Ponyville’s newest pegasus. But she pushed those warm feelings aside in favor of the business at hand; friendship was better left for social visits away from her place of work. “What did you have in mind?”
“A top and bottoms. Shoes. And… undergarments… if you can make those.”
Rarity quirked an eyebrow. “Not a dress? And undergarments? What manner of event is this outfit for, dear?”
“Event?” River matched Rarity’s confused expression with one of her own. “I just want clothes.”
“To… wear around?”
“Yes?”
Rarity smirked before permitting the most ladylike giggle River had ever heard to pass through her lips. “My dear, you do realize that us ponies don’t usually wear clothing for everyday activities, don’t you?”
“And you realize, dear, that anyone who walks behind me can see my muff, don’t you?”
Now Rarity erupted into full on hysterical laughter, and she shut her eyes tightly to try and prevent the inevitable tears from ruining her mascara. “Oh, River, you adorable, silly pony! Lower your tail!”
The transition from confusion to embarrassed shock was instantaneous, and River instinctively did as instructed, but the blush that invaded her coat was unmistakable. “I… sometimes forget I have a tail…”
Rarity was now on the ground, banging her hoof and hooting like a madwoman, much to River’s chagrin. “Oh, wait until the girls hear about this!”
“Don’t you dare!”
“Oh, the horseshoe is on the other hoof now, isn’t it?”
River gritted her teeth in anger before turning and stomping back over to Rarity’s cash register. She all but punched the drawer open and gathered up her bits, bucking it closed and storming toward the door, dramatizing every hoof step. “FINE! You just lost a sale!”
Rarity beamed in her victory and waved a delicate hoof at her friend. “Ta-ta, darling! Be sure to remember Carousel Boutique for all your future losing needs!”
River released a barely contained scream of frustration as the magical message once again assailed her ears.