//------------------------------// // End Game // Story: Sorry, But Your Princess is in Another Dimension // by Mr AJ //------------------------------// The mismatched spirit of chaos sat for a moment in shock and thought. This latest turn of events threw his plan into disarray. Sadly, the irony was lost on him. This newcomer might just be the one to turn the odds against him, if the rumors were true. Surprise, like himself and a few others had access to dimensional jumping abilities. He stood there trying to gather his thoughts when something snapped him out of it. That other human was yelling. "HEY UGLY! What's taking so long? Get your wannabe-Frankenstein ass in gear! Mr. Toothy's getting impatient!" Andy shouted across the field. "You dare to order me around? Who do you think you are? Very well though, Luna, be a dear and crush them please." He said as he sent out his first choice. After a bright flash, there stood the princess of the night. Her normal color was muted and she had an angry look on her face. "Don't take this personally, but, you'll wish you were on the moon by the time I'm done." Luna said, gliding out to the middle of the field. "Well, are you going to stand there staring at my flank all day or are we going to do this? Hey, leggo my tail! Whooooa!" Surprise shouted as Andy grabbed her tail and flung her toward the waiting princess. She smacked into the others' flared out wings before they separated and glared at each other. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I just had to find out what exactly was going on out there. All I could hear was the occasional shout or maybe the announcer every once in a while. Just how in the hell was I supposed to get out of here? I couldn't see anything, it was so dark. I felt it getting colder as well. I tried moving, bouncing around, anything I could think of, but nothing happened. "Well, you've gone and done it this time old boy." I said to myself. "If it weren't for being the unicorn stuck in a pokeball, this might be kind of funny. I mean another pony, like say Twilight would most likely just teleport out. But, how would...I....God I'm such an idiot." I facehoofed. With a bit of concentration, and a little effort, I popped out and appeared next to Andy. Twilight sat a little bit behind us next to the chainsaw, watching the fight intently. "What's going on, hoss?" I asked. Wow, it must be colder than I thought, because I could see my breath coming out in puffs of condensation. Twilight smirked. "It took you long enough. Forget you could teleport?" she asked. I just smiled and nodded. I looked at the scoreboard and saw Andy was down to his last three ponies. Discord was only down two. Being as I was still standing around and Twilight was behind us, then who was...I looked out at the field and was mildly amused and somewhat horrified by what was going on out there. It seemed that number three was Derpy. Derpy was having a tough time of it against Rarity. I walked over and sat next to Twilight. "Again, what is going on? How long was I in there? Are there snacks?" I asked the purple mare. She shivered and looked at me. I could see a sheen of sweat on her coat and a bottle of water next to her. Maybe it wasn't the temperature that was cold, maybe it was me. I looked back and noticed a light frost on my own coat and mane. It finally dawned on me. I was an ice-type. No wonder it was so cold. "Well, I'll tell you if you back up a little. You're as cold as ice." She said. I complied and backed up and plopped my plot on the ground, a small area of frost spreading out around me. Both of our eyes snapped back to the field when we heard a loud shriek, to see Rarity fire off what looked to be a pin missile attack. Derpy was doing a decent job of dodging but one passed through her mane, which led to the shriek. The announcers were strangely silent. Twilight took a breath and sighed. "A white pegasus mare named "Surprise" filled in our sixth spot, our fifth being Spike. She was taken out by princess Luna, who was then knocked out by her sister, princess Celestia. The princess was then taken down by Pinkie Pie of all ponies." I looked a little skeptical. I mean if Celestia could move the sun, then how did she get beaten by her? Twilight continued, "I know it sounds crazy, but, Pinkie used a move called "metronome" and hit her with something called "thunder wave" which left her unable to move for the most part. She was finished off with stomp. Then Spike was sent out and when he saw what had happened to the princess he unleashed "dragon rage", I think that's what Andy called it. Between that and a move called "dig", Spike took Pinkie out quickly. Discord then sent out Rarity. Spike lost in a few seconds, because of his not-so-secret crush. As you can see, Derpy was next up. That about sums it up. Oh, and it's been about an hour and no. The only snack vendors sold out about ten minutes ago." My eye twitched. I had been trapped in a pokeball, nearly frozen, my friends were losing, and I was hungry as hell. I walked up next to Andy, a wave of frost spreading ahead of me. Looking over his shoulder, I saw Derpy's status wasn't too good. "Switch her out with me." I said next to his ear. "I've got a plan." Andy nearly jumped out of his skin. Apparently, I'm quieter than I thought. "SUMMINABITCH!" "Don't need to, he's on the other end of the field. Anyway, listen." I said, and stood up and started whispering in his ear. All Twilight caught out of it was the occasional glance from me, a gesture at the surrounding stadium, a hoof pointed at Mr. Toothy, and the name "Jack Black". Andy stepped back and gave me a look that asked if I was insane. I probably was. "You sure, hoss?" he asked. I just gritted my teeth and gave a curt nod. "A'ight then. DERPY! RETURN!" He called out as a red beam lashed out and Derpy disappeared in a flash of light. Comically enough, it happened just as Rarity was attempting a body slam. She froze in mid-air long enough to see an "uh-oh" expression on her face before she smacked into the dirt. I trotted out and took a little time to stretch while Rarity got her senses back. After a second or two she stood up and realized I wasn't Derpy. "Darling, you simply must get that frost off your mane, it makes you look years older. Here, let me help!" she said and fired off a power gem attack that grazed my horn and took a good portion of the left side of my mane off. That shit ain't no joke! Better get started then! "Miss Rarity, you really need to.....chill." I replied and fired off my own frost breath at her. Not the most witty reply I know, but, whatever works. I exhaled a cloud of super chilled air that hit her flank as she turned to dodge. She jumped with a yelp and started running around in circles. "AAAAAGGGGHHHH! COLD! COLD! COLD!" I laughed until a glare from her shut me up. Oh crap. Phase two! I concentrated and called up a blanket of mist that filled the stadium. Hopefully Andy had filled Twilight in and they were working on it. I just had to keep Rarity busy until I heard the signal. "Dear, you can't hide forever. I'll find you eventually. AHA! THERE!" She yelled. I heard what could only have been a pin-missle fire off. I flinched and waited for the hit but it never came. Instead, I heard somepony in the crowd cry out. I heard soft hoofsteps to my left, and I just eased away. I suddenly got an idea. The frost on my coat and mane, if I could make it more dense and shinier.... I concentrated and the ice started building up. It was a good thing too, because I had just been discovered. An evil grin crossed the white unicorn's face. "That icy coat on your fur, it's lovely, almost magical too bad I'm going to ruin it." She snarled and hit me with another power gem shot. I didn't move and prayed my idea would work. =========================================================================== Andy turned to Twilight as soon as my mist went up. "Twilight, do you remember exactly where Discord was standing before?" he asked her. She nodded. "Yes. Why?" "I'm going to deal with him. Personally. Anthony's got a plan to get him to stop this once and for all." He replied grimly. She cocked her head to the side. "How so?" "Just some, how shall we say, aggressive negotiations." he said, reaching down and patting Mr. toothy. Twilight's lavender face took on a slight green hue. She really didn't want to hear the details, but she understood what he wanted her to do. "You want me to teleport you next to him so you can you know...?" she asked. He picked up the chainsaw and nodded. "Do you really have to though? We could just imprison him again." "From what I understand of what Celestia told-" "That's Princess Celestia." "Whatever. From what Her Royal Mooch told me, he only let you think he was imprisoned, so, that wouldn't work. It also seems that he's playing for keeps. What happened to Anthony and myself shouldn't happen to anybody else. He took one of my friends away for almost fifteen years. That's time we'll never get back. So, please Ms. Sparkle, give me this." he said, looking her dead in the eyes. She saw a chilling mix of anger and sadness in them, it wasn't something liked seeing. She nodded. Her horn lit up. "......Alright." ========================================================================== I felt a force slam into me, but no pain. I heard Rarity scream and go tumbling. My magic coat had worked. I faded back into the veil of mist, watching the frazzled unicorn stagger back to her hooves. She looked like she was getting angry. "You! You're getting my coat dirty! Come out and face me! Coward! Scared of a little mare like me?" I saw an opening. "Hah! Little? You? HAW-HAW-HAW! I've seen smaller clydesdales!" I called back. I made sure to keep moving so she couldn't pinpoint me. I heard her gasp. I could hear a sound like a tea kettle boiling over. "DID. YOU. JUST. CALL. ME. FAT?" I had her undivided attention. "Well, you are the same color as a marshmallow, and you are pretty squishy. You do the math. Oh, and y'all ain't too light neither." I answered. Tee-hee, aren't I smart? A loud roar exploded from close by. *gulp!* Maybe not the best idea I've ever had. If that small puddle next to my hooves was anything to go by, that is. A brief flash on my right followed by a flash on my left told me it was nearly time. I called up an icy wind to part the mist and sent it toward the second flash. The mist lifted and Rarity was directly behind me. She had me dead to rights and would have finished me if another roar hadn't sounded from next to Discord. =========================================================================== Discord spun the moment he had heard the noise and brought his talon down in a swipe at the source. With a rev from the chainsaw and a scream from him his talon flew through the air and landed in the middle of the field next to a horrified Rarity. She swooned and fainted and I carried her back to Twilight. Her color slowly returning. Some movement out of the corner of my eye drew my attention back to the bloody talon. It seemed to writhe like a lizard's tail does when it breaks away. Suddenly it jumped in the air and gave a final snap of it's claws before it lay still. One of the strangest things I'd ever seen and that's saying a lot. Back to Andy and Disco-or-or HOLY SHIT! I quickly made my way over. A burning, prickly sensation spread over Andy's body as a light momentarily blinded him. He felt an odd weight on his back. He rubbed at his eyes with a claw and almost dropped Mr. Toothy. A bird-like claw. Fearing what else he would see he looked down and saw dull, almost ash grey fur. Discord, meanwhile, was laughing like crazy. Andy just glared, an angry fire burning in his eyes. "You should see your feathered face right now! If looks could kill I might be in trouble. BWA-HAHAHAHA!" "Ain't no might about it. Looks, maybe not. My little friend here on the other hand..." Andy growled, tightening his grip on the chainsaw. "I'm sorry, what was th-UUUUUUUURK!" he gurgled as blade chewed through the flesh and bone of Discord's neck. "DECAPTATIOOOOON!" A look of shock and fear was permanently frozen onto his face as it hit the floor and I encased it and the now slumped over body in ice. A bright flash found us outside the stadium, both princesses standing a short distance away in the middle of seven ponies and one little dragon. "You may want to stand back a bit." the taller princess said. We moved back to where they stood and faced the castle. The princesses horn lit up in a series of, well, pulses. With each pulse, the stadium faded from sight and the castle slowly came back into being. Needless to say we were all awestruck by the display. "What's happened to all the ponies in the arena?" Derpy asked. "Are they okay?" Celestia smiled. "Believe it or not Miss Hooves, none of them were real. They were merely copies, images of ponies from around the area." "All of them!?" I shouted. "Even that pegasus, Surprise, that Twilight mentioned?" Andy cleared his throat. "Pardon me your Highness, but, WHAT ABOUT ME?" Celsetia sighed. "I'm not sure what happened to her. She was an actual pony, however, she wasn't from this world either. She may return later, I can't be sure.." Luna spoke up. "It seems Discord made a fundamental change to your body structure. Yours as well, I'm afraid Anthony. What I mean to say is that you are what you appear to be. I mean the two of you are now pony and griffon." she finished. Pinkie leapt up and grabbed the two of us in sort of a hug. "You may kiss the bird!" I wriggled away and my friend just looked at her out the corner of his eye and spoke in a low voice. "And you can kiss my ass." ========================================================================== We weren't walking back to Ponyville, oh no, the royal sisters had sent all of us back home first class. Huh. Home. This was home now. The princesses had sent letters to the mayor to make it official. I chuckled as I recalled what that conversation had led to. It had actually been pretty straight forward. "Now that that's settled, there's really no point in the two of us going home. I was thinking about staying in Ponyville. Andy? Andy?" He just stared off into space. "Just ditto that for him then, I guess." She laughed. I had to ask something else. "What about Discord's body?" "Well to answer your first problem, I'll have letters sent out to the mayor of the town, stating that as of now you are both Equestrian citizens and are to be treated as such. Secondly, about Discord. I was planning on having the Elements of Harmony turn his remains into stone and keep the three pieces sent to Tartarus. Why do you ask?" She asked. "I've got an idea." =========================================================================== "And that's how the royal guard barracks got a new urinal!" I said, having relayed my thoughts out loud to the girls. They all stared at me with expressions ranging from disbelief to disgust to utter confusion. Rainbow Dash spoke up. "So, you mean that everyday ponies are going to almost constantly...." "Be pissing on Discord's petrified corpse." I finished. She blinked a few times and fell over laughing her tail off. I looked over and saw Andy staring off out the window. I walked over and plopped down next to him. "Dude, what's wrong? I mean the transformation spell reset your age to a few years younger than me, and you can fly now. What could possibly be wrong?" He answered in a distant voice. "I can't believe she really did it." I facehoofed. It would be that. Hoo-boy. Pinkie giggled and waved at us. This was going to be a long ride back to town. I joined him at at the window, watching the landscape go by.