Joe had turned out the dining area's big overhead lights, to discourage more late-night visitors. They stood side by side at the same table as before, lit only incidentally by the kitchen lights. Joe had thrown his muffin out in disgust, but Twilight insisted on finishing hers.
Joe never pressed her for the reason why she had been crying on his doorstep, nor about the library. Twilight found it felt easier to listen when the lights weren't on her. She didn't have to nod her head or smile at the right parts, or even answer. She just relaxed and listened to Joe telling her about his regulars, about the bakery two streets down that had tried selling donuts for a tenth of a bit less, about the new tariffs on beans from Zebrica. She actually knew something about that last one, but found she'd rather keep on letting Joe's deep, comfortable voice wash over her than interrupt.
Eventually he went back to talking about Derpy, and that seemed natural, just as every long conversation in Ponyville eventually mentioned Pinkie Pie. He leaned over and touched her foreleg lightly. "Lemme tell you about when she come up with the 'banana split muffin'. One banana muffin, one cherry muffin, one chocolate-chip—all at the same time! Just stuffs them all in and starts chewing." Twilight giggled—it was all too easy to imagine exactly how Derpy would have grinned while eating it.
"So just then this cello player from the orchestra comes in, mane all tidy, spotless grey coat. Derpy sees her and runs over to tell her how good it is! Only, her mouth's still full of muffin, see? So she leap-flies over there and gets right in the dame's face, who I don't think even knows her 'coz she says "Oh, I say" and backs away right up against that wall there." Twilight snorted and barely suppressed a whinny at Joe's eerily accurate imitation of a Canterlot mare. "And Derpy's grinning and flapping her wings and going 'Mrph mrmble mrf MRFFN!'"
Twilight re-envisioned the scene in her mind, but instead of Derpy and this Canterlot mare, it was Pinkie and Rarity. She could see exactly how Rarity would arch her eyebrows and look not quite directly back at Pinkie.
"The poor mare is frozen, she's got banana-chocolate-cherry muffin crumbs bouncing off her face like she's a statue. And then—" He tapped her foreleg again. "—and then all of a sudden she shuts her eyes and shouts, 'LENTO! LENTO'"
Twilight leaned back and took a deep breath. If only they hadn't ....
He struck the table with one hoof and laughed. "Lento!'"
Hadn't not followed her to Canterlot?
Twilight suddenly realized that Joe had fallen silent and was just looking at her, and that her eyes were wet. "It's nothing," she said, and pawed at them ineffectually. "Just thinking about some old friends."
"Yeah?" Joe leaned toward her. His horn glowed yellow, and the end of his apron billowed up toward her, offering itself. She shut her eyes and tugged at it twice, once for each eye.
"I bet you got some stories too," he said.
So Twilight told Joe about how special a treat donuts were when she was a filly, and how grown-up she'd felt when she could finally afford to buy them herself. "Walking in and ordering a double-glazed for myself, with my own money. It made me feel more grown-up and powerful than the first time I addressed the House of Nobles."
She stood up a little straighter, and told him about the night of the Gala. "And in the end, all the fancy food and music and dancing weren't as sweet as sharing donuts with friends."
"I coulda told you that," Joe said. "All you need is the four Fs. Food, family, and friends."
"That's only three." Twilight had the nagging feeling she'd read somewhere what all four were, but couldn't recall.
Joe shrugged and winked. "The fourth is up to you, then."
Twilight absently took another bite of stale muffin and looked at the wooden table, pondering that list as she chewed. What would her fourth thing be? What in her life was worthy of adding to that list? Leaving the initial letter aside for the moment, what had been trying to do with her life? Learning. Publishing books and articles. Those had seemed terribly important, once upon a time. But if they were important, then by definition something important would happen once she'd done them well. Which she had.
Pleasing Princess Celestia? Was that her fourth F? Favor? Following? Fawning?
Suddenly Twilight wondered whether Celestia's visit to the library had been as casual and thoughtless as it had seemed. Was it really a coincidence that Celestia walked in the only time that week Twilight had been at the front desk? Maybe she was trying to give Twilight one final lesson, one that couldn't be taught, only learned. The teaching of no teaching. How very Zen.
And just now, running away from Luna. Deathly afraid of being rejected. Of losing that lousy fourth F. When what she needed was...
Freedom.
"Joe," she said, looking up, "thank you. You're right. I just need to take care of that fourth F."
Joe coughed violently, choking for a few seconds as if some muffin remained in his throat. "What? Now?"
"No time like the present," Twilight said grimly, stepping away from the table.
"Um, yeah, I guess." Joe gulped. Twilight stared back at him, jaw set firmly. "You're acting funny tonight. You sure you're ready for that? Sudden-like?"
Twilight shook her mane impatiently. "I've never been readier." She stamped one hoof. "It's got to be now or I'll lose my nerve."
"Uh, yeah. Great." Joe blinked, then took a deep breath. "I mean, sure! Just let me finish closing up here." He looked around the little shop as if to make sure no final customer was hiding underneath one of the other three tables. "Truth is, there were times, lotsa times I, but I didn't think...." He went and opened the closet that stood just inside the front door. "I get up real early, you know," he said apologetically. He grabbed a broom in his mouth and began sweeping the floor over-energetically, as if it were his first day on the job.
"Of course. Don't let me keep you," Twilight said, and headed for the door.
Joe stopped, the broom still in his mouth. "Mrmph?"
"Thanks so much for talking, Joe. And now, I have a princess to see." She had to see Celestia eventually, in person, and cut the apron strings herself, but it would be easier to start with Luna. And if Luna wouldn't see her, well, that was Luna's problem. As she stepped outside, she barely noticed the sound of the broom clattering to the floor behind her.