Ponemurdered

by The Gentlecolt


Chapter The First: I Couldn't Think Of Anything So I Just Words [Arcainum]

Twilight Sparkle woke up, as protagonists are wont to do of an introduction. After briefly considering writing the day off and going back to sleep, she sighed and pulled herself out of bed, blinking in the bright morning sun. She brushed her teeth. She combed her mane. She made a light breakfast of toast and eggs. She made her bed. She had one of those moments where you look at a picture frame and it’s sort of wonky so you re-jig it but it’s still not quite right and you end up spending five minutes just moving a picture frame back and forth until you give up and let it bug you all day. She performed various other mundane tasks that were necessary to create verisimilitude but detrimental to the flow of a narrative when overused. After establishing herself as an active entity and kicking Spike out of bed (metaphorically, as to visit physical violence on Spike’s person would be out of character), she began to busy herself with the deeds of the day, which primarily involved lists.

As the clock struck midday, she ticked the final item on her checklist of things to check against her checklist of things on her checklist to check against and felt a whim overtake her. Spike, after returning from his morning errands, had insisted that it was a beautiful day, and Twilight was suddenly feeling like walking, in the sense of embarking on a leisurely stroll rather than being acquitted of a crime of which she was clearly guilty. That had been last week, after Celestia had dealt with the fallout from the Please Do Not Eat Bacon In The Library Incident.

After putting her papers in order, she opened her door and strolled outside, taking great pleasure in the warmth of the distant sun against her skin. She thanked the heavens, as she did every day, that she lived on a largely temperate planet rather than a ball of flame several hundred thousand miles wide. She decided to take her walk into town.

An indeterminate period of time later, thanks to the conceptually-malleable geography of Ponyville, she arrived in the town centre. Ponies of many colours, and several of exactly the same, went about their business in town, the very picture of both hustle and bustle. Twilight took a seat at one of the tables set outside her favourite snack place in town, Horse Pun. She looked about her, taking in the atmosphere, and smiled, wondering what her friends were up to.

And then the town hall exploded.