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// Kids, Put on Your Horse Blinders 
// Story: The Onion: Equestrian Bureau 
// by The Read Later List 
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Kids, Put on Your Horse Blinders

Manehatten, Equestria- After taking his family on a vacation to Manehatten, Money Bags, a local investment broker, calmly asked his wife and children to roll up their horse blinders as they passed through a rough neighborhood.  

"I knew it was a mistake to take the family through that side of town," stated Money Bags.  "I just thought it would be a quicker way to get to the Museum of History.  I was sorely mistaken."  

According to Money Bags, the quiet, middle income neighborhood, was a "death trap" and his family was in danger every second they were there.  "When I saw the unlidded trash cans, I knew we were in mortal peril.  I did what any loving and considerate father would do in such a dire situation; told the family to hurry up and put on their horse blinders.  If you make eye contact with lower income households, they're more likely to stab you," detailed Money Bags.

The unicorn went on to say that in the future, he will be much more careful when going through dirty, earth pony infested neighborhoods.

We were unable to get a final remark from Money Bags who was shot and killed for making eye contact with a local resident who, "wanted his clothes".