Apple of My Eye

by musicalreader


Nopony Can Hold Their Liquor Pt. 2

Chapter 7- Nopony Can Hold Their Liquor Part 2

AKA: A Tale of Two Stallions


“Thanks for getting her here Orion.” Cup Cake said gratefully, “We were worried when she wasn’t in her room. Good to know she was with a nice stallion like you.”

“No problem at all Mrs. Cake. Just so you know, she kind of slipped into party planner mode while we were walking over here. I’m not sure if that means she’ll be more of a handful or less though…” Orion answered, his headphones hanging around his neck, but still blasting some loud music.

“Oh dear… Well, it’s a good thing that your shift doesn’t start until after hers then dearie.” Cup said, pinching the bridge of her snout with a hoof.

“That bad?” he asked, chuckling slightly, “I wish I could help.”

“Well, now that you mention it hun, you can. Think of it as a bit of overtime, and you won’t have to be near the shop either, so you’re out of the danger zone.” She responded, a spark of genius shining in her usually warm eyes.

“Uh oh… you’re not gonna ask me to stand out here in a cupcake costume are you?” Orion asked, backing up skittishly, images of his first job as the mascot for an ice cream shop flashing through his mind.

“What? What kind of employer would make you do that? Oh no dearie, but you will be doing some advertising for us.” Cup Cake said, pulling a receipt out of her apron and giving it to Orion, “Around the corner, near the Town Hall, you’ll see a copy shop. Give them this receipt and take the flyers they’ll give you. Then if you wouldn’t mind, hand them out to as many ponies in the market as possible. It’s still a bit early, so you’ll have it easy up until about lunch time.”

“I think I can do that ma’am.” He replied confidently, flashing a smile and turning to fly up the road to the shop Cup Cake had mentioned, she receipt in his vest pocket.

“Such a sweet boy.” Mrs. Cake said, her thoughts interrupted by a loud crashing from the back room that acted as the kitchen for the Cake family, “Oh shoot… What are those children destroying now?”

V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V

Orion was doing pretty good at the market. He’d managed to give out most of his flyers by the time mid day rolled around and ponies started taking their lunch breaks, flooding the market place.

“Yo! Orion!” Spike called out, waving at the grey pegasus through the crowd of ponies, “What’s up man?”

“Hey Spike.” Orion said, smiling at the friendly drake. “Not much really. I’m just handing out flyers for Sugar Cube Corner. They’re staying open for 24 hours as a special anniversary thing for the shop.”

“Cool. Hey, do you guys still carry sapphire cupcakes?” Spike asked, his tongue flicking out and running across the front of his teeth.

“Well, if we don’t already, I’ll see if the Cake’s can help me make a few for you when my shift starts at 5.” Orion answered, smiling back easily. He might not be used to Spike looking like he did, but at least he seemed like an easy going dragon.”

“Awesome. Oh yeah, Rainbow Dash was looking for you at the library earlier. What’s up with that? Are you making a move on the fastest flyer in Equestria?” Spike said, winking suggestively at his friend, nudging him with an elbow.

“Heheheh… No dude, it’s not like that I promise. I mean, she’s cool, but I don’t know… she seems like she’d be more trouble than anything. And as much as I like a girl that can take charge, she just seems like she’d take anything as a challenge.” Orion answered, chuckling and shaking his head. “Besides, I don’t think she’s into me like that.”

“True enough. You’re not exactly a Wonderbolt…” Spike commented.

“Oh give me a break… I didn’t even have wings until a couple weeks ago.” Orion shot back wryly.

“Dude, seriously? How did you get wings then?” he asked.

“Long story short, I won the lottery and got to move here to Equestria. Because my people look so different, and it would be difficult for me to fit into Pony society, they even helped me change forms. It’s not all bad to be honest… though I do miss
having fingers…” Orion explained, summing up his adventures thus far.

“That sounds pretty weird… Although, Twilight’s been working on this really weird spell lately that sounds kind of similar.” Spike said, having learned long ago not to question some of the craziness that magic seemed to bring out in the world.

“That’s it? You’re not even remotely curious about where I’m from? …Nothing?” Orion asked, his mouth hanging open in shock at how easily his story was accepted.

“Let me put it to you this way dude,” Spike began to explain, “Equestrian society has a pretty relaxed attitude about everyone’s past. Namely, no one cares where you come from, the only thing that matters is where you go from here. You’re a cool guy from what I’ve seen. The Princesses like you, the girls like you, the Cakes are getting some help, and you’re trying to live your life peacefully. If that’s how you are all the time, then your past doesn’t matter.”

“Wow… that’s pretty deep dude… you been hitting the philosophy section of the stacks?” Orion asked, his eyebrows raised in amazement and respect.

“Nah…” Spike denied, smiling, “I finished that section when I was still in Canterlot.”

“Well, all those books on ethics still didn’t seem to stop you from hitting your greed growth stage that one time though, now did it?” Orion countered, smirking at the teen drake, who looked back at him in shock.

“Who told you about that?!” he whispered, ducking his head a bit and looking around in case anypony else heard.
“Seriously, nopony was supposed to know that was me. The Mayor promised to keep it under wraps…”

“Relax man, Pinkie’s not the only one out here that knows things.” Orion answered, glad some of his knowledge from the show was still good.

“Just promise you won’t tell anyone else?” Spike begged, “I’ll do anything man, just don’t go telling folks. I like living here!”

“Relax Spike, I’d never tell anypony about that. I was just joking. But, if you still want to do anything to help me out, I’d really appreciate it if you’d help me hand out the rest of these fliers.”

“Done, but I am SO getting you back for that one.” Spike said, relaxing a bit and giving Orion a bit of a shove for scaring him like that.

“Whatever dude.” Orion replied, smiling and handing Spike half the remaining pile. With any luck, he’d have all the fliers handed out with enough time to relax before work.

Between Spike flying over the growing crowd in the market place and scattering the flyers over everypony, and Orion getting a surprisingly positive response from most of the mares around town, the two friends were soon done. They then went around the market to see if they could find something to eat. Luckily, there was a pretty well known restaurant nearby, and the two sat down at one of the tables outside and ordered a couple sandwiches and a large order of hay fries.

“So…” Spike asked, talking around a bite of dandelion sandwich and reaching into a pouch he was wearing to bring out a gem to munch on. “What are you going ot do with your day now that your chore from the Cake’s is finished?”

“Not sure. I went to the spa the other day, that was nice, so I figured I’d see what else the town had going on.” Orion answered, sticking his snout into the hay fries and coming up with a cluster of them sticking out the side of his mouth, and one on top of his snout.

“Uhhh... you got a little something…” Spike said, pointing at Orion’s nose, causing him to go cross eyed before he spotted the offending snack.

When they were done eating, they got up and started to head in the direction of the library. According to Spike, all the major shops, clubs, and really anything fun, was to the south of the library. When they got to the old tree though, a sky blue blur came careening out of the sky and almost sideswiped Orion… again… luckily, he’d seen her this time.

“You alright Rainbow Dash?” Orion asked, leaning over the downed pegasus, who’s eyes were spinning around in their sockets. Maybe this town was just cursed for pegasi?

“Aaah!” Rainbow Dash yelled, jumping up and preparing to fly off. before she could though, she realized that it was Orion asking, not a certain blonde mail mare.

“Sorry about that dude… I thought you were Derpy for a second there… flashback from when she tried to help me fix Town Hall…” Dash explained, blushing awkwardly and landing on the ground.

“You mean the mail mare?” he asked, finally having a chance to figure out her real name.

“Yeah, well, Derpy’s the nickname everyone knows her by. She runs into things so often that her eyes are kind of always googley looking… Her real name is Ditzy actually. Anyway, I’m alright. What brings a handsome stud like you out here to the library though?” Dash explained, blushing a bit when she said stud, but she kind of liked how he didn’t respond to it… It made him aloof… cool…

“Me and Spike were just coming here to start looking around town for stuff to do. I have off work until about five, so I figured it would be fun to just get to see more of the town.” Orion answered, looking back at his dragon friend, who was shooting him the stupidest grin he’d ever seen.

“Cool, cool… hey, did you read that note Twilight left you at the farm?” Dash asked, her eyes lighting up like she’d just had the best idea in the world.

“Yeah… There was something in that you wanted to ask me right? What was it…” he said, frowning as he tried to remember the exact wording. “Oh yeah! You wanted to know if my wings beat both ways, or something like that… Anyway, yeah they do.” He said, flapping his wings up and then down as if to prove it. “Why would you wanna know something like that anyway?”

“No reason!” Rainbow said quickly, she knew that if you never tell the other pony you like them first, because you just end up looking stupid. But she still couldn’t keep her face from blushing when he not only admitted to being bi, but then beat his wings right in front of her! This guy was just being a tease now! “Anyway, do you wanna hang out sometime? I mean, you have stuff to do today, and you’ve got work tonight right? Maybe I’ll drop by Sugar Cube Corner and say hi!”

“That sounds like fun Rainbow, I’d like that. Where are you off to?” Orion answered, smiling kindly, still a bit confused about why she was blushing, but whatever.

“I’m just going inside to check out some of the Daring Doo stuff. I heard they got a new book out last week!” She replied excitedly, flying towards the door (doesn’t she ever walk anywhere?) “Anyway, I’ll see you later.”

“Sure thing Rainbow.” He agreed, watching her zoom into the library and turning to Spike, “Is she always weird like that?”

“Dude, I’ve lived with mares all my life, I live with one, and I deal with her, and the rest of that group on an almost daily basis… I still don’t know if they’re all insane or not.” Spike responded seriously.

“Why was she looking at me funny when I flapped my wings anyway? I’ve seen her do it all the time.” Orion asked as they walked off down the street.

“Couldn’t tell you dude. Ponies have different social cues from body language than dragons. And I’ve been bored in the stacks before, but never so bored that I’d read a book on body language for a species that I’m not a part of.”

“I’ll bet if you had, you’d have an easier time of trying to get with Rarity.” Orion commented, getting a shocked expression from Spike as his reward.

“Who told you about that?” he asked, the crest over his eyes shooting up slightly, and his voice staying remarkably calm, “I got over that about a year ago, but I still never told anyone.”

“Like I said before dude, Pinkie’s not the only one that can know things.” Orion responded, smirking.

“Dang… remind me to never get on your bad side.” Spike said, following his friend as they rounded a corner outside one of the buildings Orion had learned was a popular night club with some of Ponyville residents. Though he wasn’t sure about the name… something about a place called The Riding Crop just sounded weird…

“Nah, I’m not one to hurt folks… and I doubt I’ve got the strength to hurt you. No, if anyone, I’d watch out for-”

BIG MACINTOSH! GET BACK HERE AND GIVE ME A BABY!

The pegasus and the dragon turned around to see a dust cloud kicking up in the street as a very familiar large red farmer came plowing down the road, zigzagging through the crowded streets as best as he could. Following hot on his tail was a dark red maned mare who was shouting at him to stop running. As Big Mac drew closer, he spotted Orion and Spike. He made a beeline for them and shouted for help. Orion wasn’t sure what to do, but Spike seemed to know what was up and took wing.

“Come on!” Spike yelled, “We gotta fly him back to the library!”
Without another word, the two took off, flying over the crowds and yanking Big Mac off the ground as quickly as possible, adjusting their flight path to hide in the branches of the library.

“Thanks for that fellas…” Big Mac panted out, worn out from running all the way from the farm to avoid the Heat crazed mare. “I don’t know how much longer I could have gotten away from her…”

“No problem dude. We still have a space set up for you if you need to hide out for a day or two from Roseluck.” Spike said, chuckling slightly and peeking out from the cover the leaves provided to make sure the coast was clear.

“Does that happen often?” Orion asked, looking at the two guys sharing the branch with him.

“Once in awhile… I was hoping that it would be a quiet Spring this time around.” Big Mac said, finally catching his breath and calming down. “Spike and Twilight let me stay in the basement to wait these things out, but avoiding those mares long enough to GET here isn’t always easy…”

“Yeah, but at least you have a few good stories to tell to the other guys when you sell to the bars around cider season.” Spike said sarcastically. “Anyway, you gotta lose some weight dude. Even with Orion helping me get you up here, you’re no lightweight.”

“Excuse me for being an Earth Pony. Here I thought you dragons were supposed to be strong.”

“We are. But I’m still technically a toddler by draconic standards.”

“You’re a toddler?” Orion asked incredulously, “How? You're practically as big as Big Mac...”

“Genetics dude. I’m a dragon. It takes me about a hundred and fifty years to be considered a teenager, until I’m in my 40’s, I’m still a toddler. And it’s not until I hit around the 250 year mark that I’m an adult. By pony standards though, I’m 15, so almost a legal adult in Equestrian society, but even then, i have to wait until i'm 17.” Spike explained, almost like it was a rehearsed speech he’d prepared for new ponies.

“That’s… that’s just… wow…” Orion said, shaking his head at all the implications this little revelation would have if any of the FIM-FIC writers knew that about Spike.

“In any case, Rose went running off back to her stand. She’s given up for now, so we need to get you down to the basement.” Spike said, looking at Big Mac.

“Eeyup. Thanks again for the help Spike. I can’t thank you and Twilight enough.”

“Don’t mention it. Just lose a couple pounds so it’s easier to rescue your fat flank.” Spike joked, grabbing under his red friend’s front leg, Orion mirroring the move, and they glided down to the entrance to the library and went inside.
Once inside, the boys were astounded to see something unusual even by Ponyville standards…

There was not one, but TWO book-forts in the main room. And these forts weren’t just being used to isolate their readers, they were actually protecting the mares who made them. Pillows were flying furiously between the two hard bound structures.

Twilight had fortified her position behind what appeared to be at least two editions of the full Encyclopedia Equestriana and was shooting pillows across the room almost as fast as the shells from the Party Cannon. Meanwhile, halfway up the stairs was a smaller, more colorful fortress that actually resembled an old colonial camp. And at the center of it all in her usual Technicolor glory, was Rainbow Dash… who was alternating between hoarding the pillows that missed her walls, and carrying out a crude form of aerial combat by dropping the pillows she had collected on top of the encyclopedic bunker…
In between volleys, the two girls could be heard yelling out critiques of the other’s tastes in literature.

“Your aim is about as good as those stupid dictionaries horn head!” Rainbow yelled, ducking as a pillow nearly decapitated her.

“They’re Encyclopedias! And they’re a lot better choice in reading material than those overhyped rags you like Feather-Brain!” Twilight shot back, ducking inside hr fort as Dash dropped about twenty pillows on top of her fort… How had she even carried all of those?!

“Don’t you dare talk about Daring Doo like that! The Crystal Horseshoe was ONE bad book! It doesn’t ruin the series as a whole!”

“I still say that there’s nothing rewarding literary-wise about that 50 Shades of Neigh crap! And don’t think I don’t know what you do with it! I had to unstick at least 20 PAGES after you returned it!” Twilight yelled, her face red as she shot the pillows back at Rainbow Dash’s fort, collapsing a whole chunk of the wall.

“How many times do I have to tell you!? That was Rarity! Like I’d read that piece of manure!”

“Well you still have overdue fines!”

“If somepony didn’t write the due dates in Scootaloo-Scratch, then MAYBE some of us would know WHEN you wanted them back!”

Spike sighed and pinched the bridge of his snout with a claw, calling for a cease fire while the three males walked through the room to the basement. As they walked across the battlefield, Orion was amazed they didn’t trigger any trip wires. This was absurd to worry about of course… Especially since the booby traps had been set up along the base of the stairs leading up to Dash’s fort, and Everypony and dragon reached the safety of the basement in one piece, though they could hear the pillows whizzing through the air again before they shut the door.

“Sorry about that Orion. You’re new, so you probably don’t know about the feud between those two.” Spike said, laughing embarrassedly, “Big Mac, you know where the stuff for your little “retreat” is, why not get Orion to help you set up while I get those two to cool off?”

“Works for me…” Big Mac said, waving a hoof at Orion to follow him down the steps.

So, while the brave young drake went about the business of calming down and cleaning up after two very different kinds of readers, Big Mac and Orion pulled a mattress out of a closet, threw some sheets on it, and just relaxed, Big Macintosh telling stories about seasons past where he had spent up to two weeks away from the farm, instead living in the basement of the library.

“The funny thing is, nopony ever checks for me here.” he said, laughing, “They all assume I hide somewhere on the farm. There’s only been one mare that ever thought to check for me in here, and she’s scared of the dark, so she never looked in the basement!”

“No freaking way!” Orion said, laughing so much that his sides started to hurt, “How come nopony ever thinks to check somewhere new?”

“I guess they figure that I’m not comfortable away from the farm. They’re partially right, but I need a vacation just like anypony else. Besides, staying in the library ain’t so bad. I learned a few things from some of the books they don’t keep on the shelves.” Big Mac said, his laughter dying, but the smile staying on his face.

“So is this where you learned your fancy mathematics?” Orion guessed.

“Nope. I was always good at math. It’s why I’m in charge of the book keeping for the farm. But I did learn a few things about History, some basic Agricultural Science, and the last time I was down here, I was trying to find something on Zap Apples, to see if there was a way to grow them year round.”

“Any luck?”

“Nope…”

As they finished talking about what it could mean for them to grow Zap Apples year round, Spike poked his head through the doorway and told them that it was safe to come back up.

“You go ahead Orion, I’m gonna catch a nap. I’ll see you around. And let Applejack know where I am if you see her.” Big Mac said, laying on his side and drifting off to sleep, the day of farm work and running catching up to him.

“Got it.” he responded, climbing the stairs and following Spike back into the main section of the Library, where Twilight and Rainbow Dash were still glaring at each other, although this time they weren’t behind fortifications and there was no pillow based warfare going on.

“It’s all good Orion, I made them dismantle the tripwires, and they’ve worked out a truce. Just do yourself a favor, don’t ask them why they were fighting… They said something about a late fee and then it went downhill from there.” Spike cautioned, motioning to the bickering mares.

“Thanks for the tip dude… Anything else I should know?” Orion asked, wondering why Spike was always shown as the baby in the show, it seemed like he was playing the role of a dad at that particular moment.

“Yeah, don’t try and talk books with them unless you like being the moderator for a debate.” Was all he said in reply, chuckling as he walked back to stand between the girls, who seemed to notice Orion’s presence for the first time.

“Hey Orion!” Dash said excitedly, her wings perking up behind her, making her look like she was going to take flight at any second. “What was it you said earlier about how your wings beat?”

Ignoring the oddness of the question, he simply replied by flapping his wings for her again and answering that they beat both ways. Why he was having to explain basic pegasi anatomy to Rainbow Dash was beyond him. Then again, he supposed that she never did finish flight camp… maybe she missed the part about how wings actually worked?

While he was staring off into space though, he missed Rainbow shooting Twilight a victorious look, as well as both mares blushing furiously for a few seconds.

“Awesome! Anyway, Orion, I got some questions for you.” Dash said, not wanting to miss a beat, she flew over and wrapped a wing around him, “What do you say we go over to the reading room and continue this conversation?”

“What conversation?” he asked, shortly interrupted by Twilight.

“Oh no! You are not doing stuff like that in my library!” she shouted, taking Rainbow Dash’s wing from around Orion with her magic, “He may not know what that means yet, but you sure as HAY do Rainbow, and I’m ashamed of you for trying something while he doesn’t know the full implpications!”

“Uhhh… what?” Orion asked, trying to make sense of what was happening and failing miserably. From what he could get from Twilight’s outburst though, he was pretty sure that Rainbow had just done something inappropriate… he just didn’t know what……

“Jeez Twilight, relax, if I was bothering him, I’m sure he’d say something.” Dash said grumpily, “It’s not like you don’t wanna get to know him better anyway…”

“That’s still no excuse to try hogging him!” Twilight shot back angrily, “If you are going to try and do that kind of stuff, leave! If you want to stay, then watch it.”

“Umm… for the record, I think I’d like to stick around here. I start work at five, and it’d be nice to get some reading done on a couple things in the meantime.” Orion interjected, trying to stay neutral

Twilight shot Rainbow Dash a smug look of triumph, and the sky colored pegasus seemed to pout, perking up as she realized something. Twilight had forbidden her from doing anything in the library, but she never said anything about just some simple flirting…

“I think I’ll stick around too… might show you where they keep the good books.” Rainbow Dash said, sidling up to Orion, this time careful not to put her wing around him.

“Okay then… So what kinds of things do you read Dash?” he asked, curious about what, if anything, the weather mare read beyond Daring Doo.

“Well, mostly adventure books, some books on trick flying, there’s a history book about the Wonderbolts that’s always cool to check out, and then there’s my favorite series, Daring Doo. You look like a Daring Doo kind of guy, so I’ll go get a few and show them to you.” Dash answered, perking up and running up to the second floor to bring back a few samples of the aforementioned material.

Twilight showed Orion to the couch and was about to ask if he wanted some tea while he was visiting, when the door burst in, and a rather tired looking Fluttershy entered. She greeted Spike and Twilight warmly before catching sight of Orion and freezing in place and her pupils shrinking to pin pricks.

“Hey Fluttershy…” he said softly, worried that his presence was off putting for the yellow pegasus.

“H-hi t-there Orion…” She mumbled, her head somehow managing to hide behind her mane without even moving… it almost seemed like the mane itself was a separate creature whose sole purpose was to hide her face when she was nervous…

“Sorry if I’m making you nervous… I was just helping Spike hide Big Macintosh and decided to stay and get some reading done.” He explained, careful to keep his voice low and non-threatening.

“Oh no… It’s perfectly alright… I mean… you were here first, and, well, you’re not making me nervous… well, you are… but not a bad nervous… it’s just… ummm…” Fluttershy said, eventually trailing off into incomprehensible squeaks and mutters.

Figuring it was best to try and change the subject, Orion looked at her kindly and tried to continue the conversation, “So Fluttershy, what brings you to the library?”

She seemed to perk up a little bit, though still flapping her wings a bit nervously, “I’m actually here because one of my little critter friends is sick again, and I was wondering if Twilight still had a copy of Supernatural’s floating around…”

“Yeah Flutters, we got it.” Spike said, walking up to the timid pegasus and holding out an old book that looked like it’s cover was made of wood… weird… they didn’t put little details like that in the show…

“Oh thank you Spike!” She said, her face lighting up, “Now Mr. Bearington can get over that nasty chest cold… He’s been living on my couch for the last week… and not that I want to force him… but he does make it a little hard to get around my living room…”

“Heh… I can imagine that a fully grown grizzly bear would make it a bit difficult to get around.” Orion said, his laugh causing Fluttershy to blush slightly, but at least she didn’t seem like she was going to faint or run off… or run off and then faint… So he was probably making headway.

“Well… it’s not that he does it on purpose… but I don’t think he quite realizes that he’s so much bigger than anypony else… And I remembered a remedy in here,” Fluttershy motioned at the book in her saddlebag with a wing, “That is supposed to make any animal feel 100 percent better within a couple hours. So hopefully he can go back to his cave by tonight and he can start getting out on his own again.”

“Well that’s good to hear Fluttershy. You’re always so good with animals. I’m kind of jealous.” He replied, still chuckling at the shy pegasus trying to talk about evicting what sounded like a lazy bear in such a roundabout way. It was kind of cute.

“What are you at the library for Orion?” She asked, looking around and noticing that Twilight had left the room, and Spike was preoccupied trying to put a giant stack of books back on one of the upper shelves.

“Well, it started off with Spike and me looking around the town, then we had to save Big Mac from Roseluck. Spike brought him to this safe house thing in the library, and then I kind of got roped into talking books with Rainbow Dash.” He explained, realizing after he was done that had he said that anywhere else but in Ponyville, he would have been subject to more than a few awkward stares. As it was, Fluttershy seemed to just soak it all up and nodded as if this were normal.

“Well… it is Spring after all… and Big Macintosh is one of the more popular stallions… Not that you’re not nice too… just that, well, everypony knows Big Mac, and you’re still new, so not many mares have noticed you… But they will! I’m sure they will… you’re very nice…” Fluttershy said, pausing to hide behind her hair every now and then.

I wonder if she realizes how cute she looks when she does that? Orion wondered, interjecting when Fluttershy seemed like she was talking herself in circles again.

“I actually prefer not having a lot of ponies notice me… it makes me feel exposed… like I don’t fit in.” He told her, smiling softly and sitting down on one of the cushions on the floor.

“Really? Oh but why?” Fluttershy asked seriously, as if Orion had just admitted to wanting to jump off a cloud without his wings. “You’re such a nice pony… you’re not loud o rude… you have a nice laugh… your eyes are very pretty… and your mane is something I haven’t ever seen on a stallion… you look very nice…”

Fluttershy kept talking to herself after that last part, though between her volume dropping to an almost inaudible level, and the fact that her face was now very safely hidden behind her mane, he couldn’t hear a word of it. Which was probably for the best, because he probably wouldn’t have had a clue about how to respond to such phrases as, “Perfectly shaped flank”, “Beautiful wings that I just want to wrap myself in”, and “I wouldn’t mind if you took me right now on top of the pile of dictionaries in the back”.


Now you’re just making stuff up!

No I’m not! She totally said that!

Bullshit! This is Fluttershy we’re talking about!

Are we really going to do this right now? We’re trying to write this chapter with as little Fourth Wall Fuckery as possible, thank you.

I still say that you can’t have a timid character like Fluttershy say things like that unless you have Orion and her in a romantic setting with possibility of explicit sexiness!

And I say that we’re confusing the readers with this little aside. How about this?

Dear Readers, as the author is currently having a silly moment and writing down everything that is happening inside their head, I feel it important to note that the last comment Fluttershy is reported to have said, may or may not have actually been said. I also declare this to be an extremely weak bit of existential comedy, and wish for you to please return to the story and forget that this part ever happened.

Better?

Much. Now get back to writing. I’m just your inner critic anyway.

………Fuck you………

After sitting in silence for a few minutes while the writer was talking to itself, Orion broke the quiet and asked if Fluttershy knew anything about body language for pegasi.

“Well… I didn’t do so well in school when it came to social studies…”

“Oh… was it that difficult?” Orion asked, no stranger to difficulties in school.

“No, the material was surprisingly easy… it was the presentations… I never actually did one… so I kept getting bad grades…” Fluttershy admitted. “But I can answer anything you might want to know about…”

“Okay then… what can you tell me about wings? Like, Rarity and Applejack I shouldn’t do a couple things, like stretching them out, but I see you and Rainbow doing things like that all the time… what’s the difference?” Orion asked, trying to downplay his confusion and failing miserably.

“Well……That’s a bit of a touchy subject actually…” Fluttershy said, blushing slightly before laying on a cushion next to Orion and sweeping a quill, ink, and paper over in front of her. “You see, there’s two different kinds of body language with Pegasi. There’s the normal things like the way one might move their hooves or laying their ears back… and we share those things with Earth Ponies and Unicorns. But Pegasi also have wings to worry about… and there’s even differences in how mares and stallions are supposed to use that language…”

“Okay…” Orion said, grasping everything so far, “So am I doing things that males just shouldn’t do?”

“Short answer?…….Yes.”

“I thought Equestria was supposed to be equal everywhere…” Orion muttered, turning back to the yellow mare, “So what kinds of things am I saying with my wings when I do stuff like stretching them out? Or when I hug other ponies?”

“Is that what you think that means?” Fluttershy asked, her eyes growing wide, “When you put your wings around another pony and nuzzle them?”

“Yeah… I thought that was a hug type of thing… I mean, it feels like it should…”

“Oh no Orion… A hug is when you wrap your forelegs around another pony. Wrapping your wings around them is something you only are supposed to do with a younger sibling, or a very special somepony… It means that you’re taking them under your wing and you’re protecting them… it’s a very special thing to express physically… In fact, most of the things pegasi do with their wings when it comes to body language is reserved for very intense or strong emotions.” Fluttershy corrected. Orion had to admit, if Ponyville ever needed a new teacher, Fluttershy might just be a good choice.

“What about when you gesture like it’s a third pair of hooves?” he asked, remembering how she had gestured towards the book earlier.

“Well… that’s more or less just something every pegasus does now and then if we don’t want to lose our balance and we need to point something out… That’s one of the exceptions…” She admitted embarrassedly.

“Okay then… So, what I thought was a hug was a way of saying that the other pony was under my protection, like a sibling or a special somepony… So that explains why Luna did that to me every now and then… she was letting me know she was watching over me… that makes some sense actually.” He muttered, staring off into space for a minute before turning back to face Fluttershy with an intense look of confusion. “So what was I telling everypony when I was stretching my wings in public?”

“Ummm……Well… not that it’s your fault… because you didn’t know… but you were telling everypony that you were open to stud a mare if she wanted…” Fluttershy explained, the only thing keeping her blush confined to her face was the fact that they were talking about it in a purely academic aspect.

Orion blinked………… “I was what?” he asked. “I don’t know what that last part means, but I was just stretching them to work some soreness out of the joints.”

“Well… Studding a mare is when a male shows off how fit he is, and then hopes that a nearby mare is interested, so they usually go somewhere private and well……he uh…”

“They buck like bunnies.” Rainbow Dash finished, gliding down from the top steps, a pile of books balanced on her back, which Orion had to admit looked remarkably difficult.

“They WHAT?!” Orion hollered, “How does that even work?! How does stretching your wings out mean that you’re ready to be a father?!”

“The way it works is this champ.” Rainbow Dash explained, seeing as Fluttershy had retreated into her hair again, “In Equestria, there’s about two fillies born for every colt. That means you’re in the group that is in the minority. Since you’re in the minority, you ultimately get the final say in any partner you take on. Since you want to attract attention though, if you’re a stallion, you want to let everypony know that you’re in good shape. Then from there, mares come to you and try and woo you. It’s a pretty sweet setup if you ask me. I don’t think you quite appreciate how much trouble it is to wine and dine a stallion in the hopes that they’ll want you as their special somepony.”

“I understand how difficult it is to be expected to pay for a date if that’s what you’re saying.” He muttered, still trying to process that in Equestria, he was basically in the stereotypical girl’s role in the dating scene. “So when I stretch my wings out…”

“You’re showing everypony around you that you’re a very nice, strong, healthy stallion that is ready and willing to start a relationship, and possibly be a father.” Fluttershy finished, almost quoting her flight school biology textbook.

“Holy shit……I basically flashed everyone in the marketplace…. That’s why that one mare called me a stud… That’s why everypony blushes when I do that…” he mumbled to himself, trying to process that he was the Equestrian equivalent of a guy flexing as he walked down the street… or a girl pulling her shirt up as a bunch of guys walked past… He felt dirty……
“Wait a second…” He said, frowning and his voice getting a bit louder, “You called me a stud earlier!” he said, pointing a hoof at Rainbow Dash, making sure that his wings stayed firmly at his sides.

“Well yeah. But I thought you knew what it meant… And besides, I was only kidding… kinda…” Dash said, blowing his complaint off. “It’s not like I was that mare at the market, trying to practically jump you in the middle of the road.”

“That’s… okay, that’s true… but still! You should have known better!” Orion admitted, though still feeling a little hurt, not to mention dirty.

“Dude, you’re a male in a female’s world… you get special treatment in ways you don’t even know, a little teasing isn’t that much to put up with. Besides, if anypony ever manages to hurt you, you’ve always got me willing to jump in and defend your honor!” Dash said, wrapping her wing around him and nuzzling him.

“Uhhh… is there anything else you’d like to cover?” Fluttershy asked, frowning slightly at the friendly display she’d just witnessed, partially out of jealousy, partially because Dash had just admitted to calling Orion a stud and not even tried to apologize… still, he didn’t seem too upset in the end, so she wasn’t going to push it.

Orion looked at the clock on the wall and almost ran out of the building immediately. He was five minutes late! On his second day on the job!

“I wanna say yes Fluttershy, but I have to get going, I work from tonight until early tomorrow morning. I’ll see you around though and we can go over some more stuff. Gottagonowbye!”

And with that, Orion took off out the door in a grey, purple, and black blur as he zoomed across the sky to Sugar Cube Corner.

After he left Rainbow Dash nudged Fluttershy with her hoof.

“Not bad at all. Did you see how he didn’t try and push me away when I wrapped my wing around him? I’m telling you girls, you gotta move fast, or the good ones will get taken.”

“What I saw was you being a big meanie to somepony that didn’t know any better. You should feel ashamed of yourself Rainbow Dash. You not only called him a name like stud but you didn’t even apologize for it! And then you tell him you’ll protect him, and then try to take advantage of him!” Fluttershy replied angrily, “I think you need to follow after him and apologize right now!”

“Relax Fluttershy, if it bothered him that much, he would have said something. Seriously, it's not like you can take advantage of a male anyway, they're not the ones that can get pregnant, and they all want one thing anyway… besides, I think you’re just jealous. If you were the one making these kinds of moves and getting results, you wouldn’t say a thing!” Dash shot back, still stubbornly refusing to take responsibility for trying to take advantage of Orion.

“Fine. Then I’ll just to apologize for you.” Fluttershy answered, her small burst of assertiveness fading away, and a small glimmer of a plan shining in her eyes, “And who knows, he might like me better once I spend some time with him. He might want a mare that cares about his feelings, and doesn’t just treat him like some sort of trophy. And you know Rainbow, just because he's a stallion doesn't make it any less horrible to take advantage of him... Imagine how you'd feel if he tried to pressure you into something you didn't want...”

With that, Fluttershy stormed out of the library, determined to show Rainbow Dash that not only was she wrong, but convinced that she could show Orion what a real mare was supposed to act like.

V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V^V

Even after hauling ass across town, Orion still ended up being late by a whole fifteen minutes. He thought the Cakes would fire him, or at least dock his pay, but as it turned out, they had been busy cleaning up a mess Pumpkin made while trying to help her mom at the register… and somehow managed to spill not one, but three entire sheet cakes. When he arrived, the Cakes just seemed to be happy to have another set of hooves to help clean up the shop. This was easy enough, since most of the shop’s customers had already left to go home, and allowed Orion the chance to listen to some more music while reflecting on what he’d learned from Fluttershy.

As he finished mopping and sweeping the shop, the Cake’s gave him instructions to run the shop. They also told him that Pinkie Pie would relieve him of his shift at about 3 in the morning. He almost asked why they would trust him after only having him work for them for a day previously, but then he remembered that they lived just upstairs, so it wasn’t like he was really being left alone anyway. And besides, they had given him a list of things to do if he got bored. Sure most of it was just things like ice the cupcakes, design something to advertise for the shop, reorganize the display case, and things of that nature, but at least they were things that could occupy his time.

“Now remember, if you need anything, or you just want some company, Pinkie Pie is right upstairs, top floor, last door on the left.” Mrs. Cake instructed, shooing her own children up the stairs to their rooms. “And don’t worry about waking her up, she managed to get her hooves on a couple ice cream cakes and a bag of sugar today, so she’s probably still up there working on the master plan for your party.”

“Ughhh… I really don’t want a party…” Orion muttered, “Not that I have a choice in the matter though, do I?”

“Afraid not kiddo. She’ll throw you a welcome party whether or not you want one. It’s just her way of showing new ponies that they’re part of the town I guess… In any case, remember, always smile when serving a customer, and the dark chocolate chip muffins are half off.”

“Got it Mr. Cake, you guys go take your break now. You’ve been here since the store opened up this morning, you need your rest.” Orion answered, smiling at the orange stallion, who threw him a grateful look back before following his wife up the stairs.

“Well… looks like it’s just you and me now…” he said to the empty room, the baking equipment sitting in the sink in a mountain of bubbles and sprinkles. The dishes could wait. Mrs. Cake had shown him a corner of the shop that he could relax in and have a cup of tea while waiting for any customers to show up.

“Been way too long since I had some good tea…” he muttered to himself, “Forgot to ask for some in Canterlot… damn. Oh well, May as well see what this place has.

As it turns out, the shop had a surprising variety of teas in one of the cabinets. He could only assume that one of the Cakes liked the stuff, because he had only seen Pinkie eat sugar or drink soda. How she hadn’t gotten some kind of diabetes was beyond him… Then again, she never seemed to stop moving, so that may be why she looked to be in as good a shape as she did…

He finally managed to get a pot of what was most likely mint flavored green tea brewed and set up on a tray. But as he walked through the door separating the kitchen from the front of the shop, he was surprised to see that there were actually customers. He apologized, set the tea tray down on a table near the cooling racks, and set about tending to the small amount of customers that had trickled in from outside while he was working on his tea.

“So you’re the new guy huh?” a purple mare with what looked like a fruit cup minus the cup as a cutie mark. If it weren’t for the amount of time he’d spent on some of the brony forums, he might not have known her name.

“I sure am Miss Punch. What can I get for you?” he responded, a shocked look crawling across her face.

“And just how do you know my name?” she asked, her eyebrows climbing higher and higher up her face.

“Uhhh… Pinkie was telling me about some of the ponies in town, and she mentioned you when she was talking about refreshments for her next party.” He said, half fibbing, half not so much.

“I guess that makes sense… still nice to know that a handsome stallion like you knows my name.” she answered, leaning a bit over the counter and winking, “Now, I need a dozen of the red frosted cupcakes, and a cherry pie as well.”
“Got it!” he answered happily, ignoring the awkward wink and getting started on packing the ordered sweets. No way would Berry Punch be flirting. She had a filly for Pete’s sake!

The rest of the line moved along in a manner similar to his first order, the ponies would make some small talk, place their order, he’d give them the baked goods for their bits, and the next pony would step up. There were only a couple awkward moments, the first being when Mr. Rich and Diamond Tiara showed up and asked for three dozen éclairs, two three layer chocolate cakes with buttercream frosting, and a large lollipop for Diamond Tiara. As he was packaging their order, Orion tried to make the poor joke that with all the food he had ordered, Mr. Rich must have been throwing a party. Filthy responded with a rather bored response, but Diamond Tiara stared at Orion like he had dropped from outer space.

“Why are the Cake’s letting a blank flank loser work here?” she asked, her voice dripping with condescension, “Daddy! Why is the freakish pony handling our food?”

“Now Diamond Tiara, just because the young stallion doesn’t have a cutie mark does not make him a freak. Nor does it give you the right to talk down to him.” Filthy replied, but not in a firm way… more of a, I’ve had to tell you this a hundred times and you’ve never listened, so I’m just not going to bother trying kind of way.

“Actually, Diamond Tiara,” Orion said, leaning his head down to be almost eye level with the filly, “I’m not from Equestria. I was invited to live here in Equestria by Princess Luna. And I don’t have my cutie mark because where I come from, very few if any ponies ever find their special talent.”

“Sir, I will ask you kindly to not fill my daughter’s head with such lies.” Filthy Rich said, “Please just finish our order so that we can leave.”

“Seriously, how stupid do you have to be to think that one of the Princesses, even one like Princess Luna, would stoop so low as to associate with a grown pony without a special talent. You probably just made that story up to make yourself less sad about how pathetic you are.” Diamond Tiara chipped in icily.

Orion had to literally bite his tongue to keep himself from cussing the malicious little fill- no… she was just a bitch! Anyway, he had to literally bite his tongue to keep from cussing the little bitch out right there in the shop. He settled for tacking another ten bits onto the order’s total. Not that a pony like Filthy Rich would notice anyway.

Aside from that bit of nastiness though, the rest of the evening passed by quietly. Orion swapped between finishing his pot of tea, and catering to the odd customer that wandered into the shop. Time seemed to pass by quickly enough, the clock changing subtly from six in the evening, until it read midnight. By this time, even the night owls had stopped coming in, and as he looked outside, it didn’t even look like there were any lights on in the surrounding homes. He figured that this was as good a time as any to get started on some cleaning in the back room. Not like he wanted to leave it all for Pinkie Pie after all…

As he washed the pots, knives, spatulas, and pans, Orion popped his headphones on and listened to a song he had almost forgotten about...

It was probably because of this that he didn’t hear the bell ring as the front door opened. Luckily, he was almost done by that point, so when he went back out to check the front, the yellow pony that had entered had only been standing there awkwardly for a few minutes.

“Oh! Sorry Fluttershy, I didn’t hear you come in. What’s up?” He greeted kindly, gesturing his wing at the display case and the pastries laid out on shelves around the back wall, “What can I get for you?”

“Oh… I’m not really here for food Orion… I just wanted to hang out some more. I like being around you…” She replied softly, her hair hiding a hungry look in her eye as she looked the grey pegasus up and down, not unlike a cat might look at a mouse before toying with it.

“Okay. That works I guess. I mean, it’s been quiet for awhile, so I doubt anypony else will be dropping by anytime soon.” Orion conceded, “And I like hanging around with you Fluttershy. You’re a nice break from the craziness the ponies in this town seem to get up to.”

“Well I’m glad I can help relieve you like that.” Fluttershy answered, a shy smile creeping across her face, “Oh! I almost forgot, I got Mr. Bearington back on his paws again. He took one sip of that remedial soup form the book and he practically shot out of bed.”

“Seriously? Wow… what was in that stuff?” He asked, walking over to the other side of the counter and leading Fluttershy to a nearby table and sitting down.

“Oh just the usual things… there was some celery, some tomato, a nice salmon for flavor, and about three cups of habanero peppers for extra pep.” She said, waving a wing nonchalantly. “How has work been for you tonight?” she asked, leaning closer to him over the table, looking for all the world like an innocently concerned friend. Of course, if you knew anything about pegasi body language, you’d know that her intentions were anything but innocent.

Luckily for those of you still reading, Orion didn’t have a clue, and so we get to watch some more of his awkwardness!
“Work was alright… there was some trouble with Filthy Rich and his daughter, but other than that, nothing much. I was actually about to make another pot of tea, would you like some?”

“Oh that would be lovely.” She answered, her eyes staring back into his own with a lidded expression that tried to convey that she wanted more than tea from him.

“Excellent! I’ll go see if they have anything besides that peppermint green… it was alright, but not exactly that great… I don’t know if anypony has white tea, but it’s a wonderful thing to try late at night.” Orion said, standing up and hurrying off to the kitchen, he continued talking as he gathered up the tea set from earlier and began rifling through the cupboards to see what else the Cake’s had stocked.

“Can I help you look?” Fluttershy offered, appearing behind him without a sound… she was really good at that actually… if it weren’t for her coloring, he’d bet money that she was a ninja.

“Sure. You probably know more about the kinds of tea around this place better than I do.” He conceded, trying to back up and let her through, but his tail end hit an obstruction when he ran into her outstretched wing. She slid the feathery appendage up his back lightly, eventually wrapping around his withers and drawing him close to her side. She smiled kindly at him and bent over to look into the cabinet, forcing him to lower his front half to see inside as well.

“If you’re unfamiliar with something… the best thing you can do is learn from somepony else…” She said softly, looking at him out of the corner of her eye, “And I do happen to know my way around tea, so I’ll show you how to tell certain kinds apart. The Cakes have a nice little assortment, and the key to telling them apart aside from appearance, is smell.”

“I know that much about tea… but there’s too many other smells in the air around this kitchen… it’s hard to pick up the differences.” Orion said, leaning over the container he had already identified as an black morning tea.

“Then close your eyes…” Fluttershy coaxed, brushing the tip of her wing over his eyes. He shut them and she held up a small container of loosely packed grey leaves, “Now inhale… what do you smell?”

“It smells like… almost nothing… there’s a hint of flavor… but it’s so mild I can’t pick anything up…”

“That’s because this is a regular white tea… it has almost no scent of its own, and if it has a flavor, that will be almost all you can smell.” Fluttershy instructed, changing out the container for one holding a denser blend with pieces of dried fruit and dark green leaves rolled into tiny balls. “Now what about this?”

“I smell citrus… and a touch of cinnamon?” he answered, inhaling deeply, “It also has a bitter scent to it… like it has a lot of flavor packed away into a really small space…”

“That’s a blend of green tea and spices with dried peaches.” She said, “It’s one of my favorites, but you have to be careful, it has a very strong taste, and about one teaspoon will be plenty for an entire pot of tea.”

“That’s cool… How did you get so good at this?” he asked, opening his eyes and looking at her. She was blushing from the compliment, but Orion was worried that he’d done something to embarrass her. He checked his wings and saw that they were still held firmly in place at his sides.

“I spend a lot of time with Rarity, and she actually showed me a few of these tricks.” Fluttershy admitted, “Now, close your eyes again, there’s one more I want you to try…”

“Okay… ready when you are…” he said, his eyes closing firmly.

Fluttershy picked up a special blend from the back of the cabinet that Mrs. Cake had showed her once. It was the same tea they served to couples on Hearts and Hooves Day… It was called Lover’s Blend. “Now inhale this one deeply… it’s a very special tea…” she instructed, waving her wing over the top so that the smell permeated the air around them.

Orion inhaled and his eyes flew open. This was something completely new to him. It smelled sweet, but also strong… with just the barest hint that it had a gingery undertone… he was at a loss for words…

“What do you think of this one?” Fluttershy asked, hoping that the aroma would at least work a little to help things along.

“It smells delicious… What’s it called?” he replied, his eyes losing their easy going appearance, and instead looking alert and curious.

“It’s an apricot chai tea… it’s a very special tea that normally is only served once a year… but I think this would be perfect for tonight. It’ll keep us awake, and it tastes just as good as it smells.” Fluttershy answered softly, a smile playing across her lips as she stood up holding the container.

“Well…” Orion said, standing up and blushing as he realized how close the two ponies were, “I’ll get started on the tea then… and you can go relax out in the lobby if you’d like…”

“I think I’d like that Orion… Just hurry so we can keep talking… it’s dark out, and I don’t like being alone at night.”

“Sure thing Fluttershy.” He answered, turning to get started on the water. If he had eyes in the back of his head, he might have noticed Fluttershy eyeing him up and biting her lower lip slightly as she drank in the sight of his haunches, as well as the tension his wings were exerting by trying to stay closed. “I’ll see you in the front soon then…”

As she walked out of the kitchen, Orion breathed out, having finally realized that he was holding his breath around the yellow pegasus, and relaxed his wings. They splayed out to either side of him as he got to work on getting the tea tray set up nice and pretty for two. A stray lock of hair fell into his eyes and he blew it out of the way as he reflected on how much she seemed to have changed over the last couple of days. It almost seemed like she was trying to be closer than just a friend… but that was ridiculous… right?

“She’s the element of kindness… of course she’d want to be kind to you… it doesn’t mean anything, so stop working yourself up. Besides, you’ve hardly been a pony for any time at all, so it definitely isn’t a smart thing to start thinking about them like that dude… come on… first things first, get your feet back under you, learn about living here so you stop goofing up, and MAYBE after all that, you can try and think about relationships…” he muttered to himself, pouring the boiling water into the pot and dropping in the leaves. As he carried the tray out into the main room of the shop, he saw her sitting at a table in the corner, facing him with those half lidded eyes again… her hair flowing almost like water over one side of her face, giving her a mysterious, almost alluring quality.

“Oh gods… this is sooooo not going to be easy…” he muttered, walking over to sit down next to her and pouring the tea.