//------------------------------// // Chapter 07 // Story: Forgiveness Pending // by Kiroberos //------------------------------// Maybe it was the potion-induced unconsciousness. Maybe I had a weekly quota. Maybe I was just incredibly unlucky. Regardless of the reasons behind it, I found myself in the other reality. Well in all honesty, I had no idea if this place was actually real or if it was some kind of delusion put together by my brain to further torture me during my lack of consciousness. Twilight seemed to believe that the link was gone, and maybe she was right? This could just be a sign of my slowly decaying sanity, of course. The only reason I knew that I was in space this time was due to the view out the window. My subconscious had taken me to the inside of a spaceship cabin, it would seem. The disembodied projection feeling remained as I peered around the interior. In a way, I was grateful that at least my technical training had carried over to my pony body, no matter how awkward it was. It was kind of like knowing how to do complex math without any memories of ever learning it. The skills and knowledge was simply there. In this case, I must have paid attention in some divination class somewhere, because I knew how to manipulate my mind outside of the context of my body. The cabin was comfy. Not military, that much was certain. It still felt a little cramped, but had personal touches. A couple fanciful pillows, colorful bedspreads, and an array of pictures on the walls brightened the room up quite a bit. Functionally, a bunk bed for two and single lavatory was rather luxurious by itself, though. It cost serious funds to push extra mass through space, after all. In short, I had no idea why I would be here. If this were an elaborate setup on my mind's part, I don't even know where it could have gotten the information to use as a backdrop. Failing that, the only other option was that something was linking me back to that hellish place, even though Princess Celestia herself said the link was gone. Unlikely, but go ahead and call me paranoid if you want. I made further note to stop talking to myself again, as to not further fuel my own insanity. Looking to my own 'body' did nothing, of course. There was nobody there for me to see. The surrounding area gave me little to go off, as well. Given no choice, I closed my vision and opened my Mind's Eye instead. A glorified meditation technique in most cases, the Mind's Eye did have a practical purpose in this situation. Being not in my actual body, be this either dream or some sort of projection, the Eye activated almost immediately. The world shifted into shades of gray and I glanced about, looking for anything that stood out for me. If this were a dream, I'd probably get nothing. I really hoped I'd get nothing. Unfortunately, that wasn't going to be the case. Half a second passed and I picked up a light blue glow coming from the lower bunk bed, barely a meter away from me. Damn it. So this was either a dream that was exceedingly convincing or I was really here, being pulled while my body slept. Or maybe I was rendered unconscious, as my last memory served? Of course, I could have just died from a potion overdose. Snapping out of my distraction, I looked into the sheets. It wasn't very hard to find. The blue glow made it easy to locate, but I almost wish I hadn't. My mind ached in a dull, frozen manner as I looked at the small book lying on the mattress. Its worn wrinkles graced the simple blue dyed leather cover in dignity. The simple lock adorned one side, metal showing a gentle rusting that mirrored the spine decorations. The key lay barely three inches from the book, somewhat defeating its purpose, but telling me something important. It had to be important. If only I knew what it meant. The door slid open with an audible mechanical hum before I could ponder it further. I froze, wondering exactly how visible I was to the natives of this place. With no other option, I watched helplessly as two individuals entered the room. Then the helplessness shifted rapidly to shock instead. Both of them walked upright on two legs. Further, they both wore clothing; space contact suits to be precise. They had no helmets on, however. The true surprise came from the blue fur covering their faces, long ears extending back almost a foot, short muzzles, whiskers, and slit pupils. They were my old race! They looked like I had. Well, prior to the explosion, death magic, and massive bodily trauma. Further, they possessed a curved build, both major and minor mammary gland sets, and a distinct lack of extended upper canines. They were females! The one in the lead was a little taller and had her hair tied back into a ponytail. Her eyes were a pretty teal color and looked right through me. The smaller trailed behind her a little, sporting a relaxed cascading hairstyle and brilliant blue eyes. She lingered in the doorway and glanced about the room wearing a frown. The taller one walked right through me, giving me the rather discerning view of the inside of her stomach before I killed my perception. That was something I could have lived my whole life without seeing! Well, technically I had. I considered this existence my second life regardless. The tall one stopped at the other end of the room by the time I'd pulled my perception back into place. "What's bothering you, Keela?" she asked quietly, upon observing for a moment. The one called Keela jumped slightly, as if spooked. "What? Oh, sorry, Sis. I guess I'm just a little unnerved still," she excused quietly. So they were sisters? Or really close. It made me wonder what family structure was like in my old race. There were no memories of that sort of thing at all. Did I have family too? If these girls were real and not extremely strange dream figments, then maybe I had family left too? "For one as sensitive as you, visiting the remains of our home planet can't be comfortable. How are you holding up?" the yet unnamed female questioned in seeming concern. The younger looking one shook her head tiredly before walking into the room further. Oddly, she drifted a little in her trajectory and walked around me. A subconscious thing? It didn’t seem to be that big of a stretch to think that there were other specializations too. My magic focused on three distinct subjects. Maybe she focused on detection or divination of some sort? My mild distraction abruptly ended with a wave of vertigo. My vision spun to the right rapidly, just in time to see the older girl pick up the small book. "I'm all right, Nirru. Just tired. You've been quiet too, though," Keela pointed out, sitting down on the bed next to the newly named Nirru. Nirru sighed, setting the book down again and dropping my nonexistent stomach out from under me. Ug! "I'm just frustrated. So far, we've only found this book. We need to find survivors," she muttered quietly, looking down at the cover. Keela exhaled gently and smiled, replying with, "This is a survivor. It's perfectly intact. Its magic is strong, but very strange. It's not just an Aegis Artifact." An Aegis... Artifact? That was totally new to me, unfortunately. It must have something to do with the Aegis Barrier, but there weren’t even the faintest of chimes in my memories at the name. That's how it had worked before. Some sort of external stimulus would occur, and the memories involved would slowly start to drift to the surface. It was sort of like blowing up submersibles with depth charges. This topic seemed to be firing blanks, however. "What feels so weird about it? Furthermore, what does it do?" Nirru asked abruptly, snapping me out of my contemplation. Ah well. This sounded more interesting anyway. Keela frowned and slid her small hand along the surface of the book. It momentarily felt like my mind was being brushed against. Instinctively, I held rigid and gave out no signs of life. Crap! That book! "It feels like the owner is still alive. I have no idea what it does, though. Being a book type, it will need to be opened to find out. “That’s not possible, though. At least, if it really is an Aegis Artifact. The very definition requires that the creator be dead,” Nirru pointed out skeptically, frowning down at the book as well, but making no motion to touch it like her sister. Keela didn’t respond immediately. I felt her energy dancing along the book, and in turn, myself. I made no motions and withdrew my energy the best I could as to not be detected, but she was extremely insistent. “It feels like there’s consciousness in this life-force. It’s unlike the other artifacts I’ve handled. It’s alive. The owner is alive. I can almost guarantee it!” she proclaimed, sounding confident. “Can you find anything else out about its owner?” Nirru inquired curiously, surprising me a little. Her uncertainty was slipping fast. She really trusted Keela, it seemed. “He’s very far away, but feels very close at the same time. I’m not sure what to make of the feeling,” Keela muttered, still frowning as she slipped a claw into the lock. There was a ripple and distortion once she was barely a millimeter in, and some sort of invisible field held her at bay completely. It was irritating. I glared at the book, trying to make my mind remember more about it. All I truly accomplished was giving myself a headache, of course. It was important from somewhere! That much I could be sure of. The headache got worse and reality started to bleed, images melting through my perspective. Uh oh. "He?" Nirru asked suddenly, eyes widening and little. It was almost impossible to hear her as her voice echoed and dropped off. Keela said something in return, but I couldn't quite hear it as the backdrop of the world fell out from under me. For a moment, everything was deconstructed into base energy dancing wildly. Then it all went black. * * * * * It was the oddest sensation. Kind of like you just popped out of a blender backwards, only to realize that nothing was moving in the first place. My mind snapped back into its normal spot with a crashing wave of dizziness and nausea. A headache mixed with a dull beating sensation along my left eye followed. What the heck happened?! Was I having seizures while talking to the magic, dimension-traveling frog? Wait. It suddenly occurred to me that the frog might have been a bit nonsensical. My eyes opened slowly, taking in the sight of the gently spinning room with mild disdain. After a moment to adjust, I realized with no small surprise that I wasn't in the clinic bed. Huh. Normally when I wake up from a 'nap' of unspecified duration with a splitting headache, I'm greeted with the sight of the emergency medical facilities. Managing to catch some features as they slid by, I rapidly noticed a couple large bookshelves, another bed, a desk, and a lavender blur. Huh. "Ah! I was wondering when you'd be up! I was just coming to check your temperature again. How do you feel?" the fuzzy blob that spoke like Twilight asked, sounding happy. I tried blinking. It didn't help much. "What happened and why does my face hurt?" I asked wearily. "Hey, you're awake! Finally," a new, blue blob announced, floating up in front of my vision as well. Okay, that sounded like Rainbow Dash. I must be back in Equestria at this point. The blob Twilight sighed weakly and relayed, "You got a massive overdose of truth serum mixed with a powerful hallucinogenic. You then proceeded to shout out some rather, um, interesting things at the top of your lungs in-between throwing up. Rainbow Dash, uh, kicked you in the head and knocked you out at that point." I blinked slowly, head giving another throb of protest. "Hey, he started to blab about sensitive information! I didn't have any choice," Dash defended, crossing her forelegs. I momentarily got distracted by some square looking object tucked under her foreleg. Wait, the frog wasn't real? Damn frogs! "Dash..." Twilight warned, looking over at her floating friend. My vision slowly started to focus again, and my memory caught up alongside it. Oh, oh crap. "How much did I say?" I suddenly asked, apprehensive. Twilight had shifted into focus enough for me to pick up a noticeable pink tint to her cheeks. She gave a sheepish grin regardless. "Well, mostly about Fluttershy and me. Um, just confirming what you thought about us," she elaborated. Yup. Everything the frog had said was actually me. "And I'm sorry for hitting you," Rainbow muttered a moment later, rubbing the side of her neck with a forehoof while drifting further into my field of vision. I glanced back at her, but she continued with, "But hey, you're awesome enough to survive a space battle against a powerful alien boat thingy, so I doubt a little bonk to the head is going to even slow you down!" My eyes widened a little at her sudden bragging. Wait, she actually said I was awesome? Wait, she hit me in the head?! She took it in stride, of course, returning a wink and playful smirk. Twilight laughed before climbing up onto the bed and pressing a forehoof to my forehead. "How are you feeling, anyway?" she inquired curiously, frowning a bit before pulling her hoof back and adding, "You're actually a little on the cold side." “I feel… a little bit sick,” I agreed, shifting onto my side and looking at the mare sitting next to me. She held a look of concern that was much clearer now that she was close enough that my fuzzy vision didn’t matter. Rainbow zipped down and landed next to the bed as well, taking a curious peek at me. I now realized the object she was holding was a book. Dash liked to read? That was a little surprising, but I guess I didn’t doubt it all that much. Everypony had facets of themselves that were a lot deeper than appearance. She caught me looking and grinned, pulling the book out and flipping it face forward in both hooves. Daring Do and the Three Heads of Cerberus? Oh, it was an adventure novel, by the sounds of the title and picture on the cover. She liked fiction, then? I smiled gently while looking at the cover. “Daring Do is awesome! Don’t knock reading until you try it!” Rainbow exclaimed, rocking back and forth on her back legs in an almost giddy sway. Twilight giggled at her display and nodded. “Indeed. Although I believe he’s already a fan of reading, Dash,” she pointed out, looking amused. The rainbow pegasus puffed up, looking proud, if not a bit relieved. What, was she afraid I was going to rag on her for reading or something? “Yup. I love reading. The books Twi gave me when I got here saved me quite a bit of face and social faux pas,” I muttered, blushing a little. Not all of them, sadly. “Foe wha?” Rainbow asked, tilting her head at me questioningly. “Faux Pas. A slip or blunder in etiquette, manners, or conduct, usually done in a social context,” Twilight explained as if on cue with no hesitation whatsoever. Without missing a beat, Dash snorted and started laughing. “So making an idiot of himself? I kind of wish I’d seen you when you weren’t prepared then! Oh, that would have been even more hilarious!” she exclaimed in-between snickers. My ears flattened back. Of course she’d bring up that. I knew I hadn’t been the most socially suave pony to grace the lands, but she didn’t need to remind me of that fact. “Dash! Be nice. He’s truly new to Equestria, so a few social blunders are actually totally expected. You shouldn’t tease him for it,” Twilight scolded, outright frowning at the pegasus now. Her laughter died down to a light snickering and she bobbed her head in agreement, assuring, “Don’t worry. I’m just teasing a little. Mender has a ton of guts and I can totally respect that. We made an awesome team, after all!” She smirked back at me and raised a hoof expectantly. I barked out a short laugh, and then extended my hoof as well, earning a firm, but still gentle bump from hers. Twilight rolled her eyes again, but now wore a smile instead. Heh. If she thought this sort of thing was awkward, I doubt she’d appreciate the camaraderie of a barracks, if I recall correctly. “Anyway! I’ve got to get going. I have to meet with Fluttershy to, uh, bird watch, I guess. A dare is a dare. Oh, um,” Rainbow started slowly looking down at the book she had tucked back under her foreleg. “Yes, you can obviously borrow it. This is a library, Dash. And even if it wasn’t, you know I’d let you,” Twilight reminded, smirking at her friend. The cyan coat complimented Dash’s blush well, and she nodded with a suddenly sheepish looking grin. “Thanks, Twi. You’re the best. I’ll talk to you two later, then?” she offered, fluttering into the air again without effort. I momentarily admired her flight capabilities. Having wings would be so cool. “Of course. I’m dropping by Applejack’s later today to help her with the barn if you want to visit,” Twilight agreed. I almost saw a knowing glimmer in her eyes, and shuddered. Whoa. I hadn’t realized Twi had a playful side to her like that. Oddly, the revelation wasn’t exactly a bad thing. Rainbow blushed outright now, but smirked still and nodded. “Ha, you got me there. Sold! I’ll try to drag Fluttershy there too,” she admitted, giving a mock salute with her free foreleg. "That would be a good thing, I think. See you there!" Twilight replied cheerfully, a rather warm smile on her face. I was a little suspicious of why it would be good. Silent dread slipped into my mind again. I smelled plotting. Dash threw up another salute before twirling once in the air and bursting off through the open window on the other side of the room. I watched her go, still amazed at the level of speed the mare seemed to exhibit with such ease. Everypony here was so amazing, but admittedly, the Element Bearers were extremely skilled ponies in their own way. "She really does love the Daring Do saga. Don't let her fool you, though. She was hanging around here extra-long so she could apologize," Twilight suddenly explained, tacking a giggle onto the end. I snickered and rotated to view Twilight fully again. "She's a sweetheart once you get past the exterior, it seems," I agreed, maintaining a soft smile up at her. It earned me a nod in return, followed by, "Just like you, it seems." Her playful mimicking was cute, but her tone caused me to blush furiously as her eyelids lowered a little. I swallowed. "Uh, what do you mean?" I asked uneasily. She smirked as she crawled a little closer, her hip now pushing up against my leg. "You're a gentlecolt, of course. Fluttershy knows you refused the bet for her sake. I also happen to know you find me attractive," she pointed out. Less than half a meter of air separated us. I felt my heart start to beat faster, a light sweat starting at my forehead. "I'm, um, I didn't mean to offend you!" I exclaimed, hopefully derailing any awkwardness at my apparent reveal last night. Why hadn't I realized that she was one of the mares I'd talked about last night?! For some reason, the Twilight Sparkle I associated with my crush didn't always sync with the one that was probably my best and first friend. The heat in my cheeks was probably visible and didn’t help much, though. I only hoped that she'd forgive me if she were mad. Twilight closed her eyes but continued smiling softly. A moment passed and I watched her eyes flicker slightly under their lids. She seemed to be hesitant about something. They flicked open partially a moment later, but remained at half-mast. “You definitely didn’t. It was shocking to realize that a stallion liked me in that regard, but it was far from offensive. It was just something I’ve never had happen to me before,” she assured. My system went fully into shock as she slipped back up onto all fours, leaned over, and dropped herself on top of my blanketed form. Her head rested against my chest lightly as, for a moment, she hugged my torso. The heat magnified significantly in my cheeks but I fought it back as best I could. She was hugging me! No, wait, that wasn't accurate. She was resting on top of me. Cuddling! “A-Ah. You did say you were, um, studying a lot during your time in Canterlot,” I muttered, attempting to simply keep talking to stop myself from locking up. She giggled and nodded against me. “Yeah. Not much time for boys when you’re Princess Celestia’s personal student. Which is why I was, well, hoping to ask you for a favor,” she requested, looking back up at me. Her eyes were warm and held a certain amount of pleading, it felt like. Locking mine to them, I knew there was no way I could say no, even if I had wanted to in the first place. She was gorgeous, and whether she knew it or not, she could definitely dump on the female charm to influence my thinking. Just the way her mane was splayed out, intermingling with the fur of my coat. Her warm cheek against my chest mixed with that soft smile. No! That kind of thinking was definitely not helping me just answer her! “Well, you can ask me for anything, you know. Besides, I do owe you quite a bit,” I finally managed to spit out, blushing furiously still. Yes! Just focus on how much you owe her, Mender! No need to think about how warm she felt, how gorgeous her eyes were, the soft fur against my chest, or the amazing mind and soul sealing it all together. Er, crap. She laughed. It was melodious and quite pleasant on the ears. “Relax. I want the request to be mutual with no strings pulling it one way or another. I, um, haven’t exactly been very good at sorting intangible things like my feelings. So a bit of experimentation is in order, I think!” she explained, a certain level of determination flickering into her eyes. Okay, that was adorable. I smiled at her and nodded. Wait a second. “Er, experimentation with what?” I questioned, suddenly realizing where this might be going. “Hee! You like me. I think I might like you back. How else am I going to decide if I don’t have any experience otherwise? The empirical method has never failed me yet! Well, not too much, anyway. So I want to try kissing for real now,” she explained, sitting up and leveling her face with mine. I’m pretty sure my heart stopped. Or at least if it didn’t, my chest went numb and I couldn’t feel it beating. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but no sound came out. My brain stumbled over itself. She started giggling again. “That’s an ambitious start, but we should try normal kissing first,” she warned playfully, leaning closer. I could almost feel her breath on my muzzle, she was so close. She added, “Last chance to say you don’t want to.” She leaned closer and closer while waiting. I started shaking a little but couldn’t make my brain form proper thoughts correctly. Did I want this? She was gorgeous. Her personality was amazing. So essentially, hell yes! But was this too fast? She’d only known me for three weeks now. Did she really know what she wanted? No, that was a moot point. She had decided to experiment just for that reason; to figure out what she wanted. Who was I to deny her that desire? I closed my mouth again and smiled at her instead, only managing a nod. That was all it took. Her smile turned into a grin and she leaned forward all at once. For the second time, our muzzles locked together; this time of her own volition. My sense of time ground to a halt again. Her eyes softened and slowly closed as I relaxed backwards, pulling her with me. A light hum escaped against my lips from her, and both of her forelegs slipped over my shoulders. A deep floral scent drifted into my nose as I breathed in her scents. The sensations were enough to make me light headed. She was fully willing this time, which made the sensation of her lips against mine seem so much better. Jolts of heat and tingling sensations danced up and down my whole body. I didn't deny my instincts this time, and wrapped my forelegs tightly around her back, pulling her as close as possible. The noises she made when I squeezed her closer to me were delightful. Her smells surrounded me on all sides. I couldn't escape them even if I wanted. Even though it felt like I was starving for the touch, our movements were deliberate and slow. She sampled different movements, one at a time, as if savoring my flavors. I let out a light hum, refusing to have it any other way. The heat in my cheeks expanded through my face and down my neck. My right foreleg slowly massaged up and down her back, kneading the muscles gently. My unoccupied hoof extended up and held her cheek softly, cradling her as I tilted a little bit to give her more room. She started shivering almost uncontrollably. I wasn't sure if it was a good or bad sign. She finally pulled away slightly, splitting our lips apart enough to draw in several panting, ragged breaths. My eyes opened rapidly and sought out hers, looking for any sign that she enjoyed it. Her eyes were still closed, but a deep flush extended along her cheeks. Her eyes quivered slightly before cracking open and looking into mine. They never opened fully, giving her a warm, sleepy look. "Oh wow. Why did I wait so long to do this?" she whispered weakly, nose and muzzle still pressed against mine. Did that mean she liked it? "Was it, um, good?" I asked hesitantly. It sounded good and I remained hopeful. She smirked instead of answering directly. Several small pecks a moment later told me much more specifically. "I think I might need more, hmm, experimentation to figure it out," she cooed lightly after the third or fourth small kiss. I exhaled weakly, relief flooding my system. She must have noticed it, as she giggled merrily before capturing my lips once more, this time with a hungry groan. Her kiss was a little stronger now, but I just let her move at the pace she wanted. My heartbeat quickened as she arched up, pushing me back into my pillow as she tried to almost drink me in. Jolts of pleasure and happiness drifted through my mind and it was difficult to form full thoughts. She practically purred as I pulled her down tighter into the kiss, wishing I could feel her more through this blanket! She started to shiver again as her forelegs extended to each side of my head. Was this good? Did she like it? I had no idea what to do with my forelegs, so I simply went with instinct and tried to pull her as tight against me as possible. A loud impact sounded out off to my right a moment later, followed by, "Hey, Mender! I forgot to ask. Can you help me later with, um, whoa!" Rainbow Dash's voice trailed off and died. Oh. Oh crap! Twilight shot up into a sitting position instantly, flush extremely obvious on her cheeks. "Ah, I can explain!" she declared rapidly. Wait, what? What was going on?! Rainbow Dash recovered fast, however, and had acquired a smirk by the time I looked over at her. "There's not much to explain from this angle. So, how long have you two been an item?" she asked coyly, getting it entirely wrong. My heart skipped a beat. "What?! No, we're still just friends! I was just trying to figure out how I felt and well, experimenting a little bit," Twilight tried to explain, looking as pink as I'd ever seen her. I frowned up at her instead, that leaving me with conflicting feelings. Still friends? Did she mean that, or simply want to keep her feelings a secret? I tried to assume the latter, but it was still a little painful to consider. Dash chuckled, before pointing out, "It looked like you were enjoying it plenty from your end, Twi. You don't need to hide it." Wonderful. She just had to push the lavender unicorn; the only one in the room capable of shattering every bone in our frail, squishy bodies with her mind! I was dead. Rainbow was dead too. Twilight frowned and rapidly shook her head. "I, well, I'm telling the truth. It was an experiment!" she defended adamantly, stomping her right forehoof for emphasis. I winced but didn't dare say anything as it smacked into my chest. "Twilight, stop it. How do you think that makes Mender feel?" the cyan pegasus asked, losing her smirk and actually frowning. Which part? The wanting to not admit her feelings, or the blunt force trauma to my chest? Not that it mattered if Twilight got mad again and threw me instead of the bed this time. Shivering, I tried to keep the situation, and my voice, under control. "N-No! It's all right! She has every right to experiment. It's, um, okay," I assured weakly, not entirely sure where I was going with it. Rainbow gave me a skeptical, unamused looking stare, and I swallowed nervously. Twilight let out a quiet whining noise, however, surprising me. Glancing back up at her, I saw that she was looking down at her own hoof instead as it rested on my chest. "I'm sorry. You're right, Dash. I need to be honest, especially to myself," she muttered to herself. Wait, what? Was she, uh, maybe that was sarcasm and she was actually pissed? Scenarios of her snapping and painting the library floor with my blood came to mind. Something about having a pony you know could rip you apart with her mind sitting on your stomach made it really hard to relax. In substantially different ways than a less powerful mare. I think. I shivered nervously, the image of the full size bed smashing down the flight of stairs clearly present in my mind. That level of force exerted on me, via accident or murderous intent, would result in an extremely quick death. She was stronger than the archmages in my memories, and considering what I could remember them doing to recruits like me, that was terrifying. Rainbow shook her head in my peripheral vision. "You two need to just talk to each other about it. Besides, we could all stand to be a little nicer to him," she reasoned, catching me off guard. "Ah! That's really not necessary! You all have been really nice to me so far. Probably a lot more than I deserve for putting everything you know and love in danger. Really," I repeated, not wanting to be a further drain on these amazing ponies. Oh, or be crushed violently by psychokinetic powers. Living was high up on my list of priorities, ironically. Dash shook her head and walked closer, giving me a stern glance as I looked over at her. "Mender, relax. Again. You need to stick up for yourself a bit more," she groaned, looking a bit exasperated. Frowning, I shook my head. "There's no need to. Twilight hasn't done anything wrong," I insisted. "Mender, I did!" Twilight groaned out, pushing lightly down at me with both forehooves. It happened without a conscious decision on my part. Unfortunately, I wasn't looking at her when I was suddenly jolted down, and panicked. Wincing, I rapidly closed my eyes and cowered, flattening my ears down. There was a pause, and then I heard her gasp. Risking a glance up at her, I saw that she had both hooves covering her mouth. "Oh no. No, no, no! You're... You're scared of me?" she muttered, looking visibly horrified. My eyes widened and I tried to shake my head to assure her to the contrary. Then I realized that I'd be lying. I kind of was afraid of her. She was ungodly powerful. Dash sighed, now a few feet from our bed. "Well, you kinda threw a bed at him. What did you expect?" she questioned in a surprisingly irritated manner. Twilight winced as if burned and looked away from the cyan mare, eyes starting to get wet. Did she truly regret that? Swallowing nervously, I started to shuffle out from under her using my forelegs. Rainbow was right. We really did need to talk this out more. Talking involved thinking about what I wanted to say. Thinking was a lot harder when a gorgeous girl was on my lap. Well, sort of. Did it count if there was a blanket between us? Twilight's eyes shot fully open again as she must have felt me moving under her. Before I fully realized what was going on, she collided fully with my chest again and pressed her now wet face into my fur. "No! Please don't go anywhere. I'm sorry. Having somepony scared of me feels horrible," she pleaded, voice muffled by my coat. Rainbow chuckled and finally smiled. "Mender's afraid of everypony at first. Just be nice to him," she suggested in an exceedingly amused sounding voice, giving Twilight's side a pat. I glared at her while giving the significantly less threatening lavender mare an assuring hug. "You blew me up, dropped several things on my head from absurd distances, and got me in trouble with others on many occasions," I reminded in annoyance. She promptly laughed, of course, returning nonchalantly, "Details, details! I think we're a pretty good team now, right?” That much I had to agree with, and had to nod. Twilight slid her left forehoof gently down my chest, however. When I looked back down at her, my eyes locked with hers. Tears slid down the fur on her cheeks. I swallowed again, urges stirring inside of me. Crying was hardly fair, although it definitely did a good job of almost making me forget that she could pull me apart with her mind. "Mender, please. Tell me what I can do to make you feel safe around me," she requested quietly. She really did look traumatized. Plus, Twilight was never known for her social skills, so pure probability dictated that she truly felt bad. But how could I be sure that sort of situation wouldn't crop up again? "Don't throw beds at him?" Dash suggested, stretching out and flapping her wings gently. After a moment, they sped up and she lifted into the air again. Twilight's ears drooped as she glared at her flying friend. Dash just grinned and winked at her, earning an eye roll. Twilight smirked, however, and I exhaled in relief. Rainbow did know how to defuse a situation, that was for sure. Almost as well as she created them! I sighed. That, of course, just left me. It was true; I was terrified of the lavender unicorn at times, as surprising as it was. It partly had to do with her massive level of power and skill, obviously. But part of me was afraid of her purely because she was female, I realized. Kissing wasn't unheard of in my memories, from a technical standpoint. I doubt that I had personal experience in it before Twilight, but I knew what it represented. Still, the aspect of the female was what scared me. On some subconscious level, I think it had been influencing my actions since I came to Equestria. She felt like she was more important than me. Well, Twilight obviously was, along with the rest of the Element Bearers, but even normal ponies like Lyra or Bon Bon felt 'better', for lack of a better word. Well, if you could consider Lyra normal. Extending my right forehoof back up, I gently wiped the few fallen tears away from Twilight's cheek. It didn't look like she was a pony who cried in front of others very often. It felt so contradictory. Part of me wanted to hug her and kiss her again until she stopped crying, but another part of me was afraid she'd rip off the arms I used to do so. No screaming sensation of agony came, however. Twilight simply stared into my eyes from a few inches away, both pools of lavender shivering periodically. I felt myself warming up again and wasn't entirely sure what to do. Rainbow interrupted before I could decide on anything. "Well, you two seem to be a little bit better, so I'm going to go find Fluttershy. Do you need anything else before I go?" she asked politely, grin shifting back to a soft smile. Twilight blinked twice, then smiled weakly and looked over at her. "No. Um, thank you for bucking some sense into me, Dash," she thanked quietly after a moment's hesitation. Rainbow waved a hoof nonchalantly towards us before dismissing it with, "Oh relax. I just want to see you two be happy. That's what best friends are for!” Twilight smiled fully, finally, and nodded. I couldn't help but join in as well. She really was a good mare, when she wasn't dropping things on my head. Before either of us could reply, however, she started lightly blushing. "Speaking of seeing, think you two could let me watch later when you're more comfortable with each other?" she suddenly asked, tossing in a wink after. Twilight blushed furiously at the same time my mind spun, trying to fully understand what she had just said. She reacted much faster, however, and blushing shock switched to blushing irritation. My eyes widened as several pillows and a few books drifted into the air around us. Rainbow took her cue and launched herself backwards. She stuck out her tongue as she went, barely managed to dodge two high velocity pillows, then burst back out and off the balcony a heartbeat later, laughing hysterically. I sighed quietly a moment later, blushing still. Twi nodded and slowly hauled the pillows back onto the bed. She turned back to me a moment later, smiling shyly again. I started to smile back when she ducked in and put a far more timid kiss on my mouth. My mind spun but that soft, warm sensation filled me again. This one was kept short, however. She slipped back an inch and smiled again. "Please, don't be scared of me. I, um, regret what I did in the past. I overreacted to a rather simple thing, and will never hurt you again. Can you forgive me?" she asked softly from all of an inch away. For a moment, I hesitated. She seemed honest. Taking a risk, I leaned forward, pecking her lips timidly. For a brief moment, I caught myself flinching as I did so. She smiled against my lips however, and I managed to relax. We broke apart again a moment later and she nodded approvingly. "That was much better. Thank you," she added softly, seemingly in no hurry to get off my chest. A moment passed and she faltered slightly. "Still, I've never had a coltfriend before. I, um, admit to liking you quite a bit. There! I said it. What do we do now?" she questioned hesitantly. I blinked once in surprise, then frowned. "Uh, I've never had a fillyfriend either, if that's the term. We're both kind of new to this. And what about Fluttershy?" That last part I barely managed to add. The lavender unicorn blushed and shook her head gently. "Oh, uh, didn't she talk to you before the party? She came by not more than an hour after you left, asking for you," she revealed, seemingly a little hesitant about something. Uh oh. "She was hiding from me at the Carousel Boutique when I saw her. We didn't have very long to talk," I explained uneasily. At least not between her hiding behind furniture. But she wouldn't like it if I said as much. Twilight frowned and exhaled abruptly, angling her lips so her bangs puffed into the air, momentarily. "She lost her nerve, then. What to do..." she muttered, a bit of frustration sounding through in her voice. I swallowed. That didn't sound good. "Is it to do with the memories she saw when you two helped me?" I lead, trying to get anything that would be helpful. Twi obviously knew about her issues already. She surprised me by wincing instead. "Yeah. Another thing I goofed up. It hurt both of you by me asking for her help. I should have just taken more time and not hauled anyone else in," she groaned out tiredly, looking down again. I frowned and started to move closer to her again to comfort, but she shifted back a little. "No. I thought you already knew her feelings. If I'd known she hadn't told you and your mind wasn't made up, I wouldn't have tried to experiment. I'm sorry for," she started to apologize, before my hoof gently pressed onto her lips. "Please, Twilight. Don't be so hard on yourself. You helped me by asking her for help. If she doesn't like me anymore because of things she saw, then that's between her and me. You didn’t have-" I assured softly. It was my turn to be interrupted, though. Twilight gasped and shook her head rapidly. "No! She doesn't dislike you. She knows you only wanted to protect what you loved. She's proud of that and happy. The images are what hurt her. She thinks about it every time she sees you still, and says, well..." I frowned as she trailed off. This is where Fluttershy had technically stopped, too. "She doesn't want to get in a relationship with me, right?" I finished, pretty sure that it was just in need of verification at this point. The unicorn sighed and nodded, exactly as I figured. "She doesn't think she can give it her all anymore, which wouldn't be fair to you. She was very insistent that she didn't think of you as a wounded animal, though," she explained, seemingly tacking things on as she remembered. Her expression looked stressed, and I realized she was winging the conversation on the fly. Lack of planning made for a very stressed out Twilight, it would appear. It wasn't the reason I had expected, but the outcome was the same. I'd prepared myself for it a hundred times over, so why was it still painful? I swallowed the lump in my throat. "I'm sorry. She still needs to tell you herself. I insist. And I apologize for kissing you. I thought you had already picked me," she admitted uneasily. Uh oh. The distinct feeling of screwing up came to mind. So I liked Fluttershy and Twilight, but Fluttershy didn't return my feelings because of my memories from my past 'life'. But not knowing that, I just shared a rather intimate moment with Twilight, who was now rapidly regretting it due to the feelings she saw me having for the other mare. She now refused to acknowledge otherwise until I'd talked to Fluttershy about it, who was currently probably off avoiding me with Rainbow Dash. My head start to spin and I sighed weakly. If Nurse Redheart wouldn’t have a stress attack upon seeing me again, I’d seriously consider jumping out the window while screaming. Instead, I settled with a heady sigh and shook my head. “I figured as much already. Really, Twi. I accept what she thinks of me. I just need to get my head straightened out and figure out what I think about you. Although I’m really pretty sure I already know the answer to that one,” I explained, blushing lightly after. Twilight smiled but also shook her head as well. "I know you like me. I'm glad for that, but I would have believed you without the truth serum issue. But I know that you also like Fluttershy. I just want to have you settle your feelings for her first," she explained, gently warding off my hoof away from its attempts to brush against her shoulder. I was surprised at the brief spike of irritation that went through me. I frowned. With a bit of focus, I calmed myself. I had wanted more. That distinct urge was identified again. Hormones? Not entirely, it would seem. The noticeably cute mare practically sitting on me frowned, looking unsure for a moment. I hesitated. Had I gone too far? I reined in my feelings as best I could. She hadn't intentionally teased me. "Uh, are you okay? Um, did I say something wrong?" she asked cautiously. I shook my head rapidly, hoping she wasn't upset. "No! Of course not." She frowned further and I shrank a little under her gaze, earning a groan as well. "You don't need to be afraid of me, Mender! What can I do to make you more comfortable around me?" she asked, moving her face close to mine again, following as I backed into the pillow. "Um!" I managed to squeak out in a weak voice. Uh oh! She was getting irritated now. She suddenly smirked, however. It was a knowing and predatory grin. Quite familiar, considering I'd seen it all of fifteen minutes prior. "Of course, a little positive reinforcement might help," she whispered, brushing her nose against mine. I couldn't help but blush again, a gentle smile sneaking onto my face. It was accompanied by the soft rumbling of my belly. Twilight looked confused for a moment and I peeked down at my tummy, now blushing even harder. She followed my gaze before giggling merrily. "Or some breakfast first. That works too," she agreed a moment later. I hadn't realized that my body could ask questions for me. "Ah! Uh, I'm sorry?" I offered, unsure of what to do in this situation. Twilight giggled again and shook her head. "I won't hurt you. Stop apologizing for every little thing. Let's go get some breakfast, then!" she assured, sounding surprisingly chipper. She stood up again in one fluid motion, sliding backwards and off the bed. My back legs immediately started tingling as the blood rushed back into them. I smiled at the tickling sensation while sitting up finally, attempting to pull the blankets off of me. Sadly, I wasn't anticipating the wave of dizziness accompanying the simple movement. Twilight started laughing hysterically as I became a confused, tangled ball of blankets at the foot of the bed. I glared up at her as best I could while upside down and prone. "You'll never change," she muttered warmly, giving her head a final shake before her horn lit up. I felt her slowly start to undo the blankets and sighed. This was going to be a long day.