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// 10 You Marry the Mane 6 :: T/Ro - 2nd person 
// Story: Kaidan's Short Stories: Vol. 1 - Teen 
// by Kaidan 
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{Teen}{Comedy}{Romance}{No clop, pinkie promise}


Rolling over in bed, you feel the hooves of a mare holding you tight. You were a lucky stallion, to become alpha male in the mane 6's herd. Every stallion in Equestria knew your name, but they preferred to call you "the stallion who mounted the elements of harmony" or "luckiest stallion ever." What you never expected was how difficult it was to please 6 mares with such different personalities. Your herd was as often a war zone as a harem, with a well-chosen word being the difference between love and war.

Opening up your eyes, you turn and nuzzle Pinkie Pie. She was normally a very hyper-active pony, but you made sure she would sleep well last night. As you smelled her cotton candy scented hair, you noticed it had flattened out and was straight. There was something else in the scent, something wasn't right here. . . 

Carefully sliding out of bed, you were able to make it to your desk without disturbing the mare. Looking at the calender you saw a single red dot next to today's date. It was that time of the month: the mares were in heat. If you had any hope of survival it was to make it out of the house safely before the mares woke up.

Turning around you considered grabbing your saddlebags; You would need some bits for your impromptu "guys day out." Pinkie was already stirring around in bed having noticed you were no longer there. No time for that you think to yourself. Heading for the door, each step makes a painful creaking noise on the old wood flooring. Pinkie gets closer and closer to waking up. . . finally you're through the doorway, careful not to shut the door to hard.

Passing by Twilight's open door on the right you see the curtains drawn, and Spike sleeping on his bed. "Spike!" you whisper. You consider just grabbing him with your magic and helping him make his escape too. Before you can, you notice Twilight passed out on her desk over some dusty book. It doesn't look like she is sleeping comfortably, and if anypony can stop your great escape it would be her. Better luck next time Spike.

From the door across the hall on the left, you can hear the hoof steps of Applejack. She was always early to rise, and had the stamina of 10 mares. . . not that it was an issue for a stallion such as yourself. Quickly trotting down the hall you hear her door open behind you. Without a second thought you use your magic to open the door to the foal's room and shut it behind you.

In front of you are 3 fillies and 2 colts, the first additions to your herd. As long as none of them wake up you won't be caught. You listen as Applejack trots to Pinkie's room, probably looking for you. Next you hear her approach Twilight's room. At least she's hunting me down quietly.

You watch as the sun's rays from the window get closer and closer to Twilight's sleeping filly. Behind you the hoof steps of Applejack stop in front of the foal's room. please Celestia, don't let her check in here. The hoof steps continue to the next door. Thank you Celestia, remind me to send you an extra Hearth's Warming Eve gift this year.

You listen intently to guess how far away Applejack is, when you hear a filly stirring. With the bright sun in her eyes, Midnight Sparkle begins crying. Y tu Celestia? With not a moment to lose, you open the door and leap over the railing to the first floor. You barely manage to cushion your fall with magic, as you hear more crying and hoof steps from upstairs. The door is right in front of you, but it's plainly visible from the foal's room.

The only way out is the back door, past her room. Luckily for you, it takes an act of Celestia to wake that mare up. She is into mares and stallions, which is great lest her voracious appetite drain you of your stamina. Everyone has limits. Carefully you make your way towards the back door, looking to your left to see 2 passed out mares. One sports a rainbow mane, the other an electric blue mane. The floor is littered with bottles. Note to self, have a talk to Dash about her drinking when she isn't hung over or in heat.

Walking forward you hit a bottle you hadn't seen due to your, shall we say "interest," in the two passed out mares. With a loud clinking, it ricochets off several other bottles. Your heart stops, but with the crying and shuffling upstairs nopony seems to notice. You slowly open the back door with your magic, levitating the bottles out of the way. You freeze as you hear a humming that could only be Fluttershy. She must have gotten up early to feed the animals.

Without thinking you dive into Dash's room and slam the door. Just like you expected the 2 mares are too drunk to wake up from the noise. You hear Fluttershy expressing her disappointment at all the stray glass bottles rather politely, as she cleans them up.

Realizing you are now in a pitch black room, full of glass bottles and DJ'ing equipment you do what any sensible stallion would do. With a hoof you flick the light switch so you don't kill yourself trying to walk to the window. It only takes a second to realize your mistake.

Like any good house built in Equestria, each room has outlets controlled by the switch next to the light switch. You never understood why, except so somepony can accidentally turn the power off when your busy. In this case, that switch was connected to a subwoofer, several speakers, and a mixer deck. Slamming the switches back down, you manage to silence the music after only one ridiculously loud 'wub'. Locking the door, you sigh and do it the hard way.

You don't know which switch is the light and which the stereo is hooked up to. With nothing but some magic from your horn to illuminate your path, you begin trudging through bottles to the far window. The constant sound of glass bottles clinking into each other is interrupted by a groan and another horn lighting up the room.

"Sup, you come to get a little of the action Dash is always talking about?" Vinyl looks straight at you with a predatory grin.

Taking your sudden loss for words as an invitation, as if that rough and tumble DJ would wait for one, she pounces on you. In your current distracted state your unable to maintain the light spell you had been casting, or cast anything else for that matter. There is a very horny unicorn keeping you pinned to the ground. You flail around, bottles clinking wildly as you try to claw your way out.

The lights flip on. A hungover cyan pegasus looks over to see her mare friend and husband engaging in a rather intimate act. Her sense dulled by the hangover, it takes Dash awhile to put two and two together, almost giving you time to explain.

"Wait, this isn't what it looks like! I just wanted to go for a walk and uh... get everypony muffins!"

"Oh, so you weren't trying to steal my marefriend and sneak out of the house without feeding and changing the babies? After all, the big strong stallion should have to pull his weight around the house too. Isn't that right Vinyl?" Rainbow Dash looked at the DJ and you saw that look. You know, the look mares use to say something without saying it out loud.

"I think somepony needs to be punished Dash." It doesn't take a genius to figure out what a mare like Vinyl has planned.

"I agree, and then we'll let the rest of the gals know what our brave stallion was really up to this morning while they did the chores!" Rainbow Dash began pulling restraints out of the closet and Vinyl cast a familiar silencing spell on the room.

If there was any blood left in your brain, you'd cast a teleport spell and get out of here. It's becoming rather hard to focus breathing in all the pheromones. With a sigh you resign to your fate. As if chores, 5 babies, and 6 wives wasn't enough, you were now trapped with 7 mares in heat.

This was going to be one of those days.