Chapter 6
Torches and Pitchforks
“And how long shall it be now, 'till the villains appear?” Silver Lance couldn't wait for the chance to complete this grandest of all quests.
The yellow pegasus in front of him didn't seem so enthusiastic about it though. “How should I know?”
“You are the captain of the airship! Your cutie mark is a compass rose! You should know!”
“Former captain,” Stern Breeze pointed out, her tone acidic. “My navigational duties have been relieved by captain Bluebeard over there.” She nodded her head towards the helm, where Bluebeard still stood, piloting the airship.
“But we have been sailing for such a long time now, surely our goal draws near?” Getting only silence in reply, Lance decided more persuasion would be required. “Please humor this gallant knight, who knows but little of the airship's art. Bluebeard tells me nothing, and I must know. Please, would you but grant me this small boon?”
She shook her head. “Ugh! I don't know!” With that, she stalked off, leaving Silver Lance nothing left to do but watch the scenery below drift by.
...Which turned out to be fortuitous. Far below, Lance could make out a horrible monster. Some kind of dreadful giant, it stood nigh five times as tall as a house, and it loomed just outside the lake it must have crawled out of. For now, it just stood there, threatening a nearby town with its four thrashing arms... but Lance knew this would be a problem... one that could only be solved by the legendary knight: Sir Silver Lance!
With haste, he gathered his lance from where it had lain ever since Bluebeard slew the parrot. Lance in hoof, he pressed on to face the threat. Landing the airship would take too much time. He would need to take a faster way down. He leaped off from the deck's railing, plummeting down towards the monster. As he fell, he thanked Lady Luck that such a lake had been available to land on. Had only hard ground been available, even a pony so legendary as he might have suffered some small injury. Lance grinned into the forceful oncoming wind of his descent. He knew that his mane and tail were flying behind him in as epic a fashion as could be wished for. He knew the other ponies would be watching from above. This dive alone would be legendary!
With a bone-shuddering splash, he crashed down into the lake, pressing far beneath the surface. He caught his lance in his teeth and began swimming upward and toward the shore as quickly as possible: the monster would have seen the splash. Time was of the essence!
* * *
“Hard to port! Reduce lift! Pitch down by ten degrees! Shake a leg ye sluggards!”
For once, Stern Breeze didn't mind Bluebeard's shouting. She even followed the orders, pulling on a release rope to reduce the ship's lift as she stared below at where Silver Lance had fallen.
Guilt twisted a knife in her side as she saw the splash. Sure, she had never really liked the boastful old geezer... but she never wanted this! She should have known better! These ponies were all very unstable... she should have known there could be a suicide risk. And had she caused it? Ruefully, she thought back to how she brushed him off after everypony else had ignored him... how could she have failed to see this coming?
She stared at the now still water below, fighting back a tear and silently promising never to take another pony's feelings lightly again... but then, miraculously, a pony emerged from the shallows... it was Silver Lance! He was alive! Her tears escaped now, tears of joy and relief. Silver Lance was alive and well, and even still carrying his lance! Why, look at him run! She squinted down, a little confused now. What was he doing, anyway? He seemed to be charging full-gallop, lance at the ready, toward... a windmill?
* * *
Silver Lance let the momentum of his charge build. This was going to be magnificent! Legendary knight versus epic monstrosity! It would be inspiring poems and songs for ages to come!
The creature towered over him now, but he slackened not his pace. Not a trace of fear crossed his mind. This is what he lived for! He raised his lance higher, accommodating the beast's huge frame, and braced himself for the coming impact.
With surprising agility, the giant grabbed the tip of his lance, picking Silver up high into the air, still clinging to his weapon. The monster swung Silver Lance around in a wide arc – nothing a legendary hero couldn't handle, but still quite a setback. This battle would not be easy, but Silver Lance had known that from the beginning. It would not make for a satisfyingly epic tale if he vanquished the beast with but little effort, after all.
Clinging for his life and for his honor, Silver Lance began clawing his way up the lance's shaft. He would have to free it from the monster's grip if he was to ever finish this fight. This monster was utterly, incredibly strong... but seemed to be simple-minded – that would be its weakness. It failed to see the threat Silver Lance posed: it only kept swinging the lance around, trying in vain to dislodge him. Finally, he made it to the tip of his lance. Biting into the beast's tough hide with his teeth, he began to free his lance from the monster's grip.
Silver Lance freed his weapon with relative ease: a testament to his highly trained strength.
That left him dangling from one of the monster's arms by his teeth... not a particularly tenable situation for a pony. He still had one option left though. He could exploit a weakness in the beast's armor he had noticed from the very beginning: its one enormous eye. Aiming carefully, and with perfect timing, Silver hurled his lance into the huge eye. It penetrated easily, disappearing entirely inside, and immediately, Silver Lance knew his ploy had been successful. Strange and very unhealthy noises arose from deep withing the monster, making it sound nearly as horrible as it looked. It sounded almost like grinding gears. Suddenly, the beast's arm froze in place, nearly jolting Silver Lance off of it, and the noises inside changed to a loud and urgent groaning.
Silver Lance cheered: the beast was dying! Its moan grew to a crescendo, and with little warning, the beast's arms burst off entirely, launching Silver Lance into the air.
For the second time today, Lance found himself splashing down into the lake. But it have been worthwhile: the beast's arms were scattered, and it stood motionless, gouts of smoke pouring from its eye. Silver Lance had vanquished it!
* * *
As the airship touched down, Stern Breeze looked on in horror at what Silver Lance had done. The windmill was ransacked; all four blades had broken off, and dust was billowing out of the single big upper-story window.
“What have you done!?” she shouted out, despite already knowing the answer.
“I have vanquished this loathsome creature, milady!” He certainly didn't seem ashamed of himself.
From the nearby village, ponies were already pouring out towards the windmill. They didn't look pleased with what they saw.
“And here come my adoring fans now!” Silver Lance didn't seem able to see that these ponies were anything but adoring. 'Murderous' may have been a more fitting term.
“Get ye back on the ship ye lug! There be no time for ye to be signing autographs!”
Bluebeard's command didn't seem to have much effect on the old earth pony.
“HARK!” Everypony, even the approaching mob, turned to look at Golden Word after his shockingly loud exclamation. He pointed a hoof into the sky. “The heathen sisters approach!”
* * *