“You won’t get away with this, Discord!” Celestia exclaimed, hunkering her body down, getting ready to charge her magic. “You may have tricked somepony into releasing you, but-”
“I did nothing, honest!” Discord protested, holding his paw and claw up to show his peaceable intentions. “Lord Delirious asked if he released me, if I would think about granting his request; I said yes, he then released me. I thought about it, and then decided not to help him.”
“You promised!” the green unicorn protested, his eyes as wild as his mane and tail. “You-”
“Am not stupid enough to do something that would exasperate Princess Celestia the second I get out of my prison,” Discord interrupted, buffing his talons on his chest, smiling toothily when he saw his reflection appear. “Being turned to stone twice in a lifetime, even if eternal, is more than enough for me, thank you very much.”
Celestia snorted, pawing at the ground. “Don’t try to fool us into believing you’ve reformed yourself, Discord. You won’t trick us with your words this time!”
“Oh, but Celestia, you know me!” Discord protested, creating a glowing halo above his head as he created a chair from a nearby bush, sprawling out comfortably. “I’m not a liar! I might be clever, and mean one thing when I say another, but I don’t lie! It’s but one of my many wonderful characteristics.”
While the crazed stallion in the garden kept throwing a temper tantrum, Celestia thought, looking at the Elements of Harmony for a moment. After a minute, she asked tersely, “What is it you want, Discord?”
“Something for something, Celestia,” Discord grinned, snapping his fingers as he created a single pink cloud, and filled a chalice full of-
”Chocolate rain!” two voices echoed excitedly, their combined voices nearly piercing several pony’s eardrums. As Milly and Pinkie Pie happily flopped beneath the cloud with their mouths wide open, Discord smirked.
“Oho, what’s this? A second admirer already? I’m touched!” Turning to Celestia, he answered, “I would think it is obvious what I want, Celestia. I want to cause chaos, of course! It’s not like chaos is always bad, you know. I am sure you remember the time that you, Lulu and I all-”
“What, exactly, do you want to do, Discord,” Celestia commanded, her eyes hardening.
“Hey! Dun be such a-a meanie heads!” Milly piped up from the ground, her forehoof dragging her mane out of her eyes. “He bees a nice monster that gives chocolate rains! He trying to be nice, so don’t be all mean and yelly! It hurts my ears,” she finished, whimpering slightly.
“Yes, it is so terribly rude to yell at guests, Celestia,” Discord nodded sagely, bending down to pick up Milky Way. “This little filly is clear-”
Discord saw stars for a moment as two hooves connected his his forehead, causing him to sag back against his bushy chair, nursing the side of his head in his paw. Milky Way was currently being shielded by Starlight with her one good wing. She was shaking slightly , her eyes flaming as she shouted, “Don’t you dare touch my sister, monster! If you even think of hurting her, I will rip you apart!!”
Discord blinked, staring blankly at the pegasus standing protectively over Milky Way, trying to think. He snapped his talons, taking care of the slight headache that was beginning to form, allowing him to think more clearly. “Hurt one of Celestia’s little ponies in front of her? I might be chaotic, brilliantly so even, at times, but I am not stupid, little pegasus! Wait, why... Oh, now that’s just rich!” Discord started to laugh, snickering behind his paw.
“What’s so funny, Discord? Answer my questions, or I’ll have the elements turn you back to stone right now!”
Discord chuckled a few more times, wiping a tear from his eye. “Oh, nothing, Celestia. I just found it amusing that a pegasus with a broken wing managed to hit me in the head, even though she can’t fly. As to what I plan to do, let’s see... I happen to be in a good mood. I am not quite sure if it was the sudden freedom from a prison that was supposed to last much longer, or the suddenly gaining a second fan of my fun, but-”
“I isn’t a fan!” Milly protested, poking her head out from behind her sister’s wing. “I’m Milly! And you, you’s better be nice, or else! If you try to hurt my sissy, I’ll, I’ll skewerify you!” she threatened, waving her tiny horn about.
Discord fell to the ground, beating the earth with a claw as he laughed, tears flowing from his eyes. After regaining his composure, he shrank himself, and floated closer to the small unicorn, but kept enough of a distance from the irate pegasus mare. “You really love your sister that much, hmm? What if I gave you all of the chocolate rain in the world?”
“No! I loves my sissy more than, than a bajillion worlds of chocolate rains!” Milly protested, hugging her sister as tightly as she could, as if it would protect them better.
“Ho hum... That’s such a shame, really it is, but I guess if there is nothing to do, then I shall simply have to do this!”
Celestia’s eyes widened, turning to order Twilight to use the elements, but she was too late. Discord snapped his fingers, an almost malicious smile gracing his face as a bright light flashed across the clearing. As everypony blinked rapidly to regain their sight, Starlight, Moonstone, and Milly all gasped in shock.
“What? Like I said, chaos is just that: chaos. I don’t like it when others associate chaos with pain and suffering. Chaos is supposed to be fun, funny, and most of all, random! It all depends on my mood, you know! I might decide to save your life! Then again, it might be pretty funny to steal your chariot instead...”
Starlight stretched out her wing, blinking blankly at it as she gave it a few experimental flaps, tried hovering for just a second, before settling back down to the ground, still regarding Discord warily. Moonstone merely blinked at his now cast-free hoof, put all of his weight onto it, and found it held firm. “Huh...”
Celestia blinked, trying to comprehend what just occurred. “Discord, what-”
“I meant what I said, Celestia. I have no intentions of taking over Equestria anymore. I did that last time, and, frankly, it was quite boring. Sure, I got to mess around with the elements, but that was more to spite you than to have fun. No, I was thinking of trying something a little more lucrative, which would benefit everyone. All I need is a teensy, weensy little loan, and your permission, of course,” he mocked, giving a bow to Celestia.
“Neigh! If thou wantest money so badly, thou hast to earn it like anypony else!” Luna objected quickly, narrowing her eyes.
Twilight blinked, glancing to Celestia, asking, “Um, Princess? What...”
As Twilight practiced her best fish impersonation, Discord started to pout, beginning the negotiations. “Oh come, now, don’t most businesses get to have a loan to start out? Whatever happened to pony’s ideals of equal opportunity, hmm? I’m beginning to think that you ponies are racist or something!”
Luna sputtered for just a second, before snorting dismissively. “Neigh, tis because a loan is built on trust and honesty, and while thou art, technically, truthful, you bend your words most easily to mean something else!”
“Oh come, come, Lulu,” Discord simpered, trying to annoy Luna. “Don’t be such a stick in the plot! I could just magic up whatever I wanted, but I’m trying to do things properly, to show you I mean you no harm! I don’t even need that much money, really.”
Luna narrowed her eyes further, her horn glowing as she teleported a rectangular box with beads in front of her, growling, “How much art thou requestiong?”
“Nothing extravagant, of course. How much does a couple hundred acres cost anymore?”
Luna’s eyes widened in horror as she stared at the wooden box. Sputtering, she managed to choke out, “How much?! Art thou mad?! Do you even comprehend how much land costs anymore?! We nearly had a heart attack when we arrived back and found out how much land doth cost in this modern world! Not even Abby can compute such large quantities!”
“Abby?” Half the ponies asked, confused.
“Mine abbacus, of course, what else?!”
Moonstone blinked, then waved at the wooden box, mumbling, “Hello?”
Discord fell to the ground in laughter once more at Moonstone’s comment. “Fine! Seems ponies can’t take a joke anymore! So you’re saying there’s no land anywhere that ponies want to be rid of?”
Pinkie Pie, having had the chance to drink her fill of chocolate rain, spoke up. “You mean like the Everfree Forest? Or Ghastly Gorge? Or “
“And just what do you want to do with said land, Discord?” Celestia asked warily, though she was, albeit slowly, allowing her guard to be lowered.
“Why, make an amusement park, of course!” Discord said with a grin, sweeping his arms wide. “Just imagine, ponies and griffons and what have you traveling for miles just to go to the most unique amusement park in the world, guaranteed to never be the same every day, or your money back! Everypony wins! Ponies who want something chaotic, memorable, and cheap, of course, would be able to indulge in some chaos, I get to do whatever I want to without fear of retaliation, and you would get taxes and safe, happy citizens!”
In the stupefied silence that followed as the princesses struggled to think of the flaws with Discord’s request, Chrysalis spoke up, suggesting, “What if you used Changelings as your employees? All they need to be paid is love, which ponies would be generating by having fun, and since they can shape-shift, they could keep changing what they looked like, so that they wouldn’t even get help from the same pony twice. Is that chaotic?”
“Sally!” Celestia exclaimed, scandalized. “You can’t tell me you’re actually siding with him, are you?”
“W-well, why not? He can’t help who he is! He’s trying to find a compromise that works for everyone, and it’s not fair that you aren’t even trying! What happened to equality for everypony?”
“What about safety laws?” Celestia retorted, waving a hoof at Discord. “He can’t promise to keep somepony from getting hurt, or from-”
“Healing them right afterwards?” Moonstone deadpanned, interrupting. When the two princesses stared at him, he shrugged. “What? He healed my hoof! If he can do that, even if he can’t keep ponies from getting hurt, why couldn’t he just heal them later? Part of the fun of adventure is the risk of getting hurt while getting a story worth telling. Any adventure you can manage to walk away from is a good adventure. Well, mostly...”
“Walk away from this!” a maniac voice shouted right behind Moonstone.
Moonstone dropped like a rock, barely turning the stagger into a roll as he struggled to create a barrier from the anonymous assailant. Discord, amused, snapped his talons, turning the stallion that had released him into a garden bush, chucking evilly. “What a shame there aren’t more, or else I could make a few new statues to take my place in the garden. Oh well.”
After everypony recovered from the shock, Celestia glared at Discord, stomping her hoof. “Discord, change him back!”
“Whatever for, Celestia? You saw him yourself, he was attacking Whitey over there, so I just protected him. No need to thank me.” Discord dismissed Celestia’s order, sprawling out on a fresh pink cloud, turning briefly to fluff the top into a more pillow-like shape, settling back comfortably.
“Discord,” Celestia growled, her eyes beginning to burn.
“Oh fine,” Discord sighed, snapping his talons half-heartedly. “You really need to get that stick out of your plot.”
Now prepared, Moonstone easily restrained the green stallion in a bubble. Taking a deep breath, Moonstone calmed himself, frowning crossly at the clearly insane stallion. “What do you want?”
“You took my wife away from me you son of a-”
Moonstone added a silencing barrier to the magical cage, looking over to Starlight. “So are what he was going to say curse words?”
Removing her hooves slowly from Milly’s ears, she nodded.
“Oh... Okay, and those aren’t nice to say to other ponies?” Moonstone questioned, thinking about it for a second. “Ohh... Oh.”
Mis face darkened as he shook the ball around, silencing the stallion. Releasing the silencing barrier, Moonstone snarled, “What do you want, you worthless maggot?”
“Because of you my wife was taken away from me and falsely accused to be labeled insane!” the green stallion raved, his eyes dilated at different levels, his eye and ears twitching sporadically. “So now I’m going to kill you! I challenge you duel to the death!”
After a second of shocked silence, Moonstone asked calmly, “What are the rules, and what are you offering?”
“What?!”
“Moonstone, thou can not be serious! Just allow Us to-”
“Why not?” Moonstone interrupted everypony else’s interruptions. “I’m not going to just disregard his request when he’s got a legitimate reason to duel me. I’m not going to turn him down until I hear what he has to offer. It’s not like this is my first life or death duel, come on. Now, whatever your name was, what were you saying?”
“N-not your first,” Twilight stuttered as she started to understand the implications. “Y-y-you, you... You’ve killed a pony before?!”
“Huh? Well yeah, what kind of question is that?” Moonstone questioned, tilting his head to the side.
“W-why would you do that?!”
“... Because outside Equestria, things aren’t all nice and peaceful? Because, sometimes, it’s kill or be killed? Because, sometimes, somepony is going to die, and if you can’t heal them, then it’s a mercy to kill them quickly so they don’t suffer. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m trying to negotiate the conditions of the duel. Hush.”
While Twilight sputtered indignantly, trying to think of a rebuttal, the green stallion offered, “Everything. I offer my title.”
Moonstone blinked, then asked, disappointed, “That-that’s it? You only have one title? Well... What’s the title?”
The stallion blinked, then snarled, “I’m a noble, dumbass! I’m putting my property, money, my very name on the line, and that’s how you respond?!”
“Ohh, that kind of title... Oops. Well, in that case, I-”
“Wouldn’t advice you accept, Moonstone,” Celestia warned grimly.
“... And why not?”
Luna answered neutrally, “He has an Equestrian title, Moonstone. If you accept, when you win the duel, you will have to swear fealty to not only myself, but to Celes as well.”
Moonstone blinked, the blood slowly draining from his face. “W-what? B-but that’s not fair! Surely swearing fealty to just you would-”
“It would not. To swear fealty to only myself would be considered an act of treason against my sister, which is punished by death. On the other hoof, though, if you’re a noble, you won’t ever be forced to run away. You’d be able to live comfortably for the rest of your life. Tis not a light matter, it seems,” Luna mused, tapping her chin.
Moonstone sighed, sitting down heavily, trying to work out the pros and cons of accepting the duel, when Milky Way trotted over to him, scowling only in the way that little foals can: angry, but still cute. “Why you gonna be meanie head? You dun hurt other ponies unless dey bees hurtin you!”
“Shut up and stay out of this you little runt!” Lord Delirious snarled.
“Conditions?” Moonstone asked softly, narrowing his eyes.
“No! Dun be meanie head!” Milly protested, her eyes watering. “You dun-”
“None.”
The green stallion shot his foreleg out, his hoof catching Milly painfully on the side of her head, sending her sprawling out of the way.
Moonstone’s transformation was nearly instantaneous. Starlight hadn’t had the opportunity to see Moonstone when he had gone into a rage before, as she had been unconscious. Now, as she watched his mane and tail burst into blue flame, his red eyes now glowing in the fading twilight, she was beginning to wish she were unconscious once more.
Digit Pi and Serene rushed to Milly’s side, cradling the sobbing filly as they ran away from the fighting. Starlight thought she was too stunned to move, but as Moonstone’s coat slowly darkened from white to grey, she grew worried enough to whimper, “I-is that normal?”
“Luna, spell! Girls, Elements, now!” Celestia ordered quickly, her own horn glowing to stop the duel before it could get messy.
“What a pity...” Moonstone monologued calmly, levitating the struggling green stallion towards himself, turning him around every which way, examining him as he continued in his bored voice. “I thought for a second, just for a second, that I would finally be able to duel an honorable opponent, who followed the rules. Too bad you broke on the most basic rules of dueling.”
Moonstone brought the stallion close, using a barrier to keep the stallion from moving as he hissed into the other’s ear. “Nopony hurts foals, especially around me, and gets away with it.”
*Crack*
Moonstone scowled as the green stallion’s corpse fell from his magical grasp, the stallion’s neck broken. “... That’s it? That wasn’t even an illusion? He didn’t even try to dodge or block? He just let himself get captured? How arrogant...”
Luna released her spell, pouring all of her strength into her magic. Moonstone stumbled, his coat flickering colors slightly as he struggled for control in the magical battle in his mind. “Come on, Moonstone, snap out of it!”
Starlight slapped Moonstone, putting all of her pent-up anger and energy into the slap, hoping it would startle him badly enough for Luna to gain a better hold. Moonstone grabbed her with his magic roughly, shaking her a little as he growled, “Are you really trying to get in my way, Starlight? I’m going to purge this filthy world of any monsters that think that foals are just their punching bag. If you insist on getting in my way, I’ll have to, regretfully, eliminate you. Now, are you-”
Starlight’s eyes widened as she saw a rainbow burst from the ground some distance behind Moonstone, heading in their direction. Starlight closed her eyes, bracing herself for the attack, shivering as she prepared herself for the end.
Moonstone paused for a second, his form flickering for just a second, as a confused, “Star?” escaped his mouth as he saw how scared she was.
The world turned white from pain as the elements hit Moonstone. After several seconds. Moonstone felt the energy swirling around him carry a part of him away, leaving the rest to swirl around him, setting him back on the ground, unconscious.
.o.O.o.
Starlight laid on the grass, next to Moonstone, doing her best not to hyperventilate. After taking several deep breaths, she turned to Moonstone, tentatively poking him with her hoof. Please don’t be dead, please don’t be dead, please be cured, please be cured...
Moonstone stirred, his eyes opening slowly. “L-lady Starlight? Wha...”
Starlight stiffened, her wings shooting out in alarm. Moonstone’s left eye had turned eerily pale, while his right eye was still a bright crimson. “I don’t think that worked!” she screamed to the others in a panic, flapping her wings rapidly to get away as quickly as she could, leaving a confused unicorn laying on the ground to fend for himself.
Moonstone tilted his head to the side, scratching his head absently as he noted how exhausted he was. Maybe a nap would be nice... Oh, she’s flying again... I wonder what it’s like to fly... Must be nice...
While Twilight and the others were beginning to get fatigued, Starlight’s panicked shout revitalized them. Adrenaline pumping once more, they charged the elements as quickly as they could, before Moonstone could move or attack again.
As the rainbow powered by the elements neared Moonstone, however, Starlight noticed Moonstone’s earring begin to glow unnaturally bright, forcing her to look away, shielding her face with her hooves.
Celestia and Luna’s eyes widened in horror as the elements hit Moonstone, brightening the area, before the elements exploded, surging back to Twilight and her friends. The bearers were bowled from the sky as the rainbow washed over them, slamming them into the ground, creating miniature craters.
Luna and Celestia withdrew their wings from their faces, having covered themselves to protect their eyes from the explosions of dust, dirt and grass. As they teleported to where the elements lay, their eyes grew wide.
Luna was only able to open and close her mouth a few times before Shining Armour was running on the scene, several guards behind him. “Princess! I saw the elements being used; what’s... Twili!”