Rarity Becomes a Toaster

by xara


The Best Thing Since

Rarity, a kind and generous unicorn pony, designer, fashionista, and occasionally diva, woke up and was a toaster.

She opened her eyes; well, she got the feeling that she had opened her eyes, and she could somehow see, but across the shiny, metallic surface of what passed for her body, she did not in fact have any eyes. Nor did she have ears, nose, horn, mane, tail, or hooves. She was looking out from one side of her toaster shape, instinctively assigning it the designation of 'front'.

She was sitting, or standing... well, she was on a counter top, facing the rest of the room. She saw shelf after shelf lined with books and scrolls; tables topped with quill, paper, and ink gave her the immediate recognition of Twilight's tree-house lower room.

What in Celestia's sun-burnt flank is going on? she shrieked in her thoughts, no sound emanating from her. She tried to look around, but the desire had no effect; her sight was locked in place, taking in the view with no means to alter it. I've been... transformed?!

A window pane on the opposite side of the wall had just enough reflectivity in the morning light to reveal what she had become. Toasters weren't unheard of in Equestria, so the realization dawned quickly. Equestrian toasters did not use electricity, of course (said technology not yet being a part of the pony repertoire), but contained small charms which allowed the heating elements to activate when powered by magic. For that reason, they were generally only found in unicorn homes or unicorn-run restaurants, and even then, only the more upscale ones.

She hadn't been dreaming, at least, not that she could recall, and there had been nothing odd about the previous night when she had slipped below the covers of her luxurious silken sheets. She hadn't recently found an unexplained mystical object or been on a quest of great import. She hadn't tried to cast a dangerous spell which had the chance to backfire, nor had Twilight asked her to volunteer for magical spell-testing. All the same, she was a toaster.

Her back felt warm. Her body cast a hint of shadow across the counter-top; she must be in front of one of the windows. After making that conclusion, she realized that feeling the warmth at all meant she had sensation other than sight. She closed off her vision and tried to extend her mind towards the warmth, trying to reel in any other feelings.

Coolness from the front, the shiny metal section that was shaded from the early morning rays. Four little nubs from below gave the sense of pressure; they must be the 'feet' resting atop the counter. On her front were two knobs that gave the impression of turn-ability, and on each side she felt the presence of a lever. Her insides felt... incredibly strange. She felt naked, almost shameful, which for a pony was entirely new. Ponies sometimes wore clothes, of course, for events and celebrations, but otherwise went around happily unclad without a wayward glance or comment. Instead, she felt exposed, the coils of her heating elements touching the air that entered through the four slots lined up in her top.

How could Twilight leave me sitting out here like this? she thought, irritated. Didn't the mare know about toaster cozies? She would happily have sewn together a pretty design to match the decor here, such as it was, but this felt lewd to lay here with knobs and slots there for all the world to see.

Magic. She had to try her magic. She had no horn, but maybe... if she focused...

If she'd had lips, she would have been biting the lower one, closing her eyes and trying to bring up the glow that surrounded a unicorn's horn when she channeled magic. Perhaps the hint of a spark, but... otherwise, nothing happened. She was trapped!

Of all the worst things that could happen! This was intolerable!

Movement from the side of her eyes and the sound of hoofbeats (Ah, so she had hearing, as well) interrupted her building pout. Twilight! Her friend would surely be able to render assistance, but how could Rarity get her attention without being able to use magic?

Twilight appeared in Rarity's vision, her eyes a little bleary and her mouth opening to fit the gaping maw of a yawn-stretched mouth. The unicorn approached the far window, pushing it open along the hinge, letting in a tiny breeze that crossed the room and tickled Rarity's top. From a table to the side, Twilight levitated a small brush, running it through her ruffled mane a dozen times or so until it approached normalcy, then repeated the action on her tail. She returned to the edge of Rarity's vision, moving to the bottom of the stairs before calling out in a mild shout.

"Spike? Are you having breakfast today?" called out Twilight up the staircase.

Rarity could hear a faint, muffled voice, but could not make out the reply that the baby dragon gave.

"Sleep late if you want, Spike, but you'll have to cook your own meal if you don't join me."

Again a muffled voice, a little louder.

"Okay, you cranky night-dragon!"

Twilight moved from the library/study area and came over to the kitchen, with its cupboards, counters, and small wood-burning oven. Rarity tried to focus once more on casting a spell; she had felt a little spark of her magic, but something was interfering. If she could make one of her knobs spin or one of the levers pop while her friend was close, she could alert the pony, who would hopefully investigate the odd occurrence.

Focus, focus Rarity!

Twilight swung open the door of the oven, channeling her own magic with ease, touching her horn to the pile of sticks and logs inside, igniting the packed tinder with a quick flash. As the fire spread, lighting the thicker pieces of wood, she lifted a hoof and closed the door. Moving to the cupboards, she retrieved a frying pan, gripping the handle in her teeth and laying it on the stove-top. From a cabinet below that counter, she pulled out a clear glass bowl, then walked over near where Rarity sat.

Twilight... thought Rarity. She urged one of the levers to pop to surprise her friend, but neither would budge. She pictured her body rocking forward suddenly, smacking the counter and startling Twilight, who would save her, but that didn't happen either.

"Hmmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-ahhh-ah-ah," Twilight hummed, pawing open a cabinet below Rarity's sight. "And awesome holi-daaays... " An egg carton appeared, coming to rest in front of the toaster-pony, and it flipped open, followed by three eggs flying out from within. Returning to the bowl, Twilight gave each egg a tiny, sharp rap against the counter's edge before spilling the egg's innards into the bowl, dumping the shell into a trash-can. She opened a drawer; with a whisk, she brushed through the yolks and whites, turning them into a scrambled mixture. This she poured into the frying pan which sat on the heating stove.

Twilight came back to the counter-top in front of Rarity, closing the carton and returning it below. She came back up with...

Ohhh, no-no-no-no-no-no-no!

...a loaf of bread.

Another drawer opened, and a serrated bread-knife deftly cut one, two, three, four slices from the loaf, while Rarity panicked. Twilight, don't! she tried to call out. Ignoring the unheard protest, Twilight lifted a hoof, placing it on the edge of the bar which turned the toaster's knobs, spinning each from light to dark. Rarity shivered, in her mind at least, as her friend's light touch sent a little shock through her metallic body. She knew what was coming next... and she had no way to prevent it.

The bread slices lifted into the air. Rarity desperately tried to cover her slots, but she had no hooves, nothing to move to protect herself. She watched with dread as they approached.

Gasp! Violation! The first slice entered her left-most opening; the fluffy white baked-dough pressing against both sides within. The feeling of exposure tripled within Rarity and with three small pops the other slices entered her, but a new sensation was rising. The heating coils beside the slice seemed to lean towards each piece, trying to press against them despite her protestations. She hadn't wanted the slices inside her, but, well, they were a little comforting in the way they nuzzled there. Still...

Twilight moved her hoof to the side of the toaster and it descended upon the lever. Rarity felt tension build up inside her as the lever lowered, first on one side, then the other.

And then... heat. Not like the sun-warming that still shone on her back, from heat from her body itself, the magic charms powering the coils that stretched out inside as they grew hot.

She couldn't stop the sensation. Each coil shone upon the sides of the bread within, but Rarity felt as if she were sweating, and the thought of lip-biting returned, along the idea that she was being tickled. Or perhaps it was more like an itch she couldn't reach. The heat within her grew and grew, causing the itch to feel both satisfied and as though it was growing wider and wider and she couldn't reach it all.

With another gasp, she realized it had become pleasurable. Each slice reflected back some of the warmth; her whole body had become a reservoir of heat. Had she not wanted the slices inside? She could sense each of them growing stiff as they cooked inside her body. The tension was loosening from the levers; suddenly Rarity felt a flash of anger. They were going to leave her - she had to keep the hard dough inside!

She struggled, fighting back the growing urge to release the bread, but the heat was touching her very core, and she was losing what little control she had.

Oh, oh sun! she cried in her mind. A massive wave of ecstasy rushed through her body, and she let out a mind-gasp as she released, spilling the dark-brown slices of bread into the air above her.

Twilight, having seen to the eggs while this was going on, came over and, happily humming still, pulled the slices out one by one and placed them on a plate. Rarity felt drained.

There was a knock at the door; Twilight brought the plate to her table, then turned to see who had arrived.

"Oh, hi Twilight," came Fluttershy's soft greeting. "I don't mean to bother you... I'm sorry for interrupting your breakfast, but... "

"It's okay, Fluttershy, what's going on?"

"It's just... I was supposed to have spa day with Rarity, only she hasn't shown up, and... "

"Mmm, well, I haven't seen her, I'm afraid."

"Ohh kay... sorry!"

Before she could hear the last of the conversation, there was a sudden snap and a rush of wind, and then Rarity was at home - in her pony body again!

"What in the hoof?!" she shrieked.

"Why, Rarity, didn't you like my gift?" came the voice of a familiar antagonist.

"You... you... you did this?" Rarity spun around, searching for the source of his voice, which came, oddly enough, from a face poking out of her bedroom wall, leering at her. Discord!

"But of course, my little pony. Why, after you all went to such lengths to defeat and then reform me, I've learned such wonderful," the word was delivered with a little mockery, "things about the magic of friendship. In light of your generosity, why, I thought I would give you a gift to remember!"

Rarity stamped her hoof on the floor. "You... !"

The face in the wall laughed, one eye becoming as large as a dinner plate just as the other shrunk to the size of a coin. "Well, I suppose if you didn't care for it... " Discord's whole visage began to dissipate.

"Wait!" cried Rarity.

"Yeeeessssssssss?"

The unicorn blushed. "Erm. I suppose I wouldn't mind if... I got that gift again sometime. But on my own terms!" she insisted.

After all, that feeling... it had been one of the Best. Feelings. Ever.

Discord cackled, and vanished.