The Antimark.
An MLP:FIM fanfic by Dashie_Rising
She tried not to fidget too much as she stared at the room in which she was placed. Although she had seen it many times before, albeit under much less grave circumstances, the approaching verdict made her breathing short and her heart rate quick.
Scootaloo, the last of the CMC and certainly the last in Ponyville without a cutie mark, flitted her wings nervously as she awaited Nurse Redheart's return. Soft hoofsteps outside the door caused her to hold her breath, hoping her results were in the green. As the door creaked open, revealing a white mare with a nurse cap, Scootaloo broke the immense silence.
"Well? What did you find?? Huh?!"
"It's..well..." The nurse stammered. She hadn't seen a case of the antimark in nearly 30 years.
"I'm sorry Scootaloo...i really am..but even the highest level unicorn doctors from Canterlot agree that you have a severe case of the Antimark.." the nurse said sadly.
"The Antimark? I've never heard of that before!" Scootaloo exclaimed.
"Yes, well we haven't seen a case in almost thirty years..but even then, they recovered...your case, on the other hand..." Redheart trailed off.
"So...will I ever get a cutie mark? Will i ever get to feel like I belong for once?.." the teenage mare asked, tears beginning to form in her eyes.
The nurse faltered in her composure. How could she tell the poor filly that her years of crusading and attempts to find her talent were wasted?
"I...I'm sorry Scootaloo...but we've determined that your case of the Antimark is...uncurable...you will never have a cutie mark of your own..." Tears welled up in the older mare's eyes, having just destroyed any hope of a normal life for her distraught patient.
Scootaloo's heart stopped dead in its tracks, taking her breath away and forcing a flow of tears out of the filly.
"You...you mean...I wasted all those days crusading with my friends? Those days idolizing Rainbow Dash and wishing to be just like her were just for nothing?!"
The orange mare held back her tears as her voice approached a small scream. "And no matter what i get good at, nopony will ever see beyond my...my...blank flank??!"
Tears were flowing freely down the filly's face as her world collapsed around her. "I'm sorry-" Redheart tried to apologize, but the young pegasus would have none of it.
"Applebloom and Sweetie Belle both got their cutie marks, and even Babs discovered her talent! But...but I'm just a blank flank forever?!? This isn't fair!!"The pegasus was now laying on the inspection bed, crying loudly into her hooves
.
Nurse Redheart shuffled over to Scootaloo's side and began stroking her mane softly in an attempt to calm the distressed filly.
"Now, now, its not the end of the world...you may not have a mark to show your talent, but that doesn't mean your skills won't exist as well."
Scootaloo sat up and pointed a hoof at the nurse. "It may as well be the end of the world! Its easy for you to say, since you've got your cutie mark, and i don't..or ever will..."
The filly let out another barrage of sobs at that, and the waterworks seemed to have no end in sight.
"Scootaloo...we have had the best unicorns in Equestria on the case, and even the Princesses themselves admit they cannot cure the Antimark..." Though she tried to console the heartbroken pegasus, Nurse Redheart seemed to only make matters worse.
"What...what about Twilight?...or Zecora?...or anypony?! Why can't they help me??" The filly pleaded with her only witness.
"You know as well as i that Twilight and Zecora both headed the research team on your case. They did all in their power to help...but..." she trailed off again. Her uncertainty didn't help the situation any more than escalate it.
"But...but Zecora cured the cutie pox when Applebloom had them! How come she can't give me my mark? Its basically the same thing!" Scootaloo wept softly.
"That's just it...they aren't the same. Removing a temporary condition like the cutie pox is possible...but the Antimark...it is a condition that was born with you..meaning there is no cure..." she stated softly.
"But magic has come so far! Twilight runs Celestia's research division in Canterlot, and they've figured out how to view other universes! How is it that they can't cure this??" Scootaloo whined.
The nurse tapped her hoof against her chin, thinking of a way to explain the situation that the distressed filly would understand.
"Lets say...for instance, if Rainbow Dash suddenly felt being a pegasus wasn't what she wanted to be. If she felt being a...unicorn made her happy. Sure, we could try to make her that way, maybe by swapping her body with another pony's, would she still be the same Rainbow Dash you know on the inside?"
Scootaloo had stopped sobbing to listen to the nurse after hearing her idol's name, but was shocked to think she would willingly give up her wings for a horn. But what the white mare said made sense to the young pegasus.
"I...i guess she would?" She managed to choke out.
"Good." Replied Redheart, feeling a bit more connected to the filly now. "And the same for you. If you discover your special talent was...being a daredevil."
Scootaloo's eyes lit up with the idea, but she remained silent, allowing the nurse to continue.
"Would you really need a cutie mark to show your stuff when your actions could show it for you? Does it matter that you're a ...blank flank..."
The words felt like an insult as she said them, but the pegasus seemed too absorbed in her speech to notice.
"...all your life, if everypony can see your talent for themselves?" She continued, having broken the filly's sobbing down to a few sniffs. "Besides, what if you discover you are great at more than one specific thing? Would two cutie marks really be the best way to showcase that?"
The nurse thought back to the cutie pox incident and shivered. She looked into the filly's eyes as she waited for an answer. Scootaloo wiped away her tears and regained her composure before she spoke again, her voice cracking on the first few syllables.
" I guess...that wouldn't be so bad...being known for my talents and skills rather than my name or cutie mark..." she glanced off into space as though fighting a decision in her head. "But...what about all the bullies like Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, and...and...ill be called a blank flank all over Equestria!!"
The tears had renewed their flow as the filly once again fell victim to her own thoughts. Nurse Redheart could barely keep herself from tears, knowing all too well what the pegasus was experiencing...
"Scootaloo.. I have an important story to tell you, but only if you can keep it a secret between us." She whispered to the still sobbing young mare.
In between fits of sobs, the filly managed to squeak out "I Pinkie Promise..."
Redheart looked content with the confirming statement, being all too familiar with the party pony's classic endowment of secrecy. 'Besides,' she thought 'I wouldn't have any patient confidentiality without the darned thing!'
Remembering her original thought, Redheart leaned in closer to Scootaloo, and began her tale. "You remember how I said the last case of the Antimark was over 30 years ago?" The pegasus nodded silently. "Well I understand fully how you feel..since the last case was my sister...Hospitality Redheart..."
At this, Scootaloo gasped. "You have a sister?! And she was..the same as me...?" She said, realizing small tears building up on the nure's cheeks.
"Yes...and no. While you two share the condition, hers was..less intense..."
"How so?" The filly asked.
"Well, she realized that her condition was irreparable and decided to make the most of her life. She tried new things and made many acquaintances and enemies along the way."
Scootaloo interrupted by adding "I do that daily! And I'm still miserable..."
The nurse silenced her with a hoof. "Wait. I'm not done yet." The filly nodded and the nurse continued.
"Hospitality decided that no matter what happened, despite her blank flank, she would overcome the condition and all of its trials. The next day she awoke with a purpose in her heart: to help others like her find a place in society."
"Others? I thought you said she was the only other one!" Scootaloo interrupted again, only to be met with a quieting gaze. "Heh, sorry Nurse Redheart." She apologized.
"Its quite alright. And by others, i meant ponies who couldn't earn their marks. She decided that if she couldn't have her mark, she'd get everypony else theirs. The same night she set her mind to that goal, something changed inside Hospitality. To this day we do not know what, but somehow she awoke with her cutie mark, ten years after she should have gotten it."
Scootaloo's eyes went wide at this, thinking she would be just like Hospitality. The nurse took a moment, then continued.
"She thought it was fate, whereas the medical world stated it was a miracle in short. Princess Celestia said that it was Hospitality's revelation, her decision to cast aside her doubts and fears to renew hope in the hearts of young fillies like yourself that brought the Antimark to an end. I just feel like if you can accomplish the same...to feel in control of your fate rather than let it rest with bullies and neigh-sayers, then you too can somehow overcome this curse..or condition...or whatever it is..."
Scootaloo noticed Redheart sobbing openly, the tears joining hers on the floor. The young pegasus was taken aback by the sudden change in the caretaker in front of her. She didn't know what to do, so she did what any filly would: hug. Scootaloo wrapped her hooves around Nurse Redheart as best she could, letting herself start to cry, despite not knowing why.
"It..its okay..n..nurse Redheart..." she was lost for words. The pony who had comforted her during all her illnesses and injuries was now the one requiring comforting. All she could do was hold the embrace until the nurse slowly let go.
"I..-sniff-... I'm sorry you had to see me like that Scootaloo...its just...i see so much of Hospitality in you..and since she passed...i feel more and more hopeful she will appear in the ponies she tried to help the most..." her sobs renewed at this, only making Scootaloo more distraught not knowing how to help.
"Passed? As in...gone to the next life?..." Scootaloo had not known much of death, but her few encounters had opened her eyes to the grief of loss another pony could feel. While she certainly felt there was another..life or something after death, she had her mind caught on Redheart's idea of her sister's soul resting within hers. She didn't expect that, of all things, but no matter how odd it seemed, she held onto the idea to comfort the now disheveled nurse sobbing beside her.
"I..understand it may be an odd idea..." Redheart began, "but I see a lot of her in you. Your bravery and loyalty to others and the unwavering sense of finishing what you start...your mane is even the same color..." that last part made Scootaloo shiver a bit, but the nurse seemed to have not noticed.
"You..you really mean that?" She asked, not sure of what to think.
The nurse went to a cabinet and procured a picture frame from the far back. She brought the picture to the young pegasus, who immediately spotted Hospitality and Nurse Redheart, both fillies without their cutie marks as the only two ponies in the picture. Hospitality was almost as Scootaloo had imagined. Her similar purple mane, held back by the younger sibiling's hoof as she struggled to stay on her sister's back. Her eyes were a deep red, and her coat was a lighter shade of orange resembling Applejack more than herself.
Scootaloo felt the tears well up... she had never felt the love of a sister..and Rainbow Dash was hardly the emotional type, despite being a "big sister" figure for the filly's childhood. Wanting to forget the painful thoughts flowing back to her, the young pegasus handed the frame back to the nurse, who gingerly placed it back in its cabinet.
"I'm so..so..sorry.." she said, finding it difficult to form the simplest words. "I just thought since you're experiencing almost the same thing Hospitality did, I thought id get to see my big sis again..but i know that's not possible." The nurse said, still facing the cabinet.
Scootaloo closed her eyes and thought about it all. The Antimark, her resmblance (albeit little) to Hospitality, and how she had overcome the trying times to gain her cutie mark anyways. Scootaloo silently swore to herself that she would help the memory of Hospitality live on in her actions and words, to help both Nurse Redheart and herself overcome the obstacles, both mental and societal, that they both faced.
"She will live on. I promise, no matter what, that Hospitality's spirit will live on and i will carry on her ideals...in thr hope that I too can overcome such a large challenge!" Her hoof was raised in the air and a defiant look graced her face.
Nurse Redheart let out a few new sobs of joy after realizing the pegasus' new view on what only minutes before was the 'end of the world', and seeing that her sister's passing would be expelled from her grieving mind by the winged angel sitting before her.
All she could do was utter a quiet "thank you..." before her tears swept her away again, encouraging Scootaloo to return to her hug idea. She was hardly the emotional type, but she could make an exception this one time. As she pulled the tearful nurse into another hug, she smiled softly, knowing her future was now not so dark, if even only a single road had been lit by the few moments she just shared with the older mare. For once in many years, Scootaloo felt free from worry, fear, and sadness. For now, she had a purpose. Hospitality's spirit and Nurse Redheart would be made proud.