//------------------------------//
// Return 
// Story: Last 
// by Alan Smithee 
//------------------------------//

	“Simon, it’s Al. Focus on my voice. Don’t move. Relax. You’re still recovering from stasis. You’ve done this before. Stay still until you feel normal. You’re going to be all right.

“Simon, we are in polar orbit over Earth. We can land at any time.

“The reason we haven’t landed is that I haven’t picked up any sign of human activity anywhere.”
 
“Don’t try to speak. Please stay calm. Breathe.

“The global satellite network is gone. There are only a half-dozen satellites in orbit and most of them are not broadcasting anything useful. I have only received one message that is decipherable: A message describing a facility called ‘Vigilant’. The coordinates in the message place Vigilant in northern Scotland, above the snowline. The message is dated 3659. This is the latest date I have found attached to any transmission. The satellite gives the current date as 30 April 5039, though the satellite’s clock is likely out of synchronization and is probably inaccurate.

“Simon, please calm down. You’ll hurt yourself if you try anything strenuous at this stage in the recovery process.

“You might not know, much of our monitoring equipment was for one-time use. I’m afraid we don’t have very reliable data on our own planet from where we are. I’m sorry.

“Here’s what I’ve determined: Earth’s biological patterns have changed significantly. The Americas have lost 90% of their vegetation. East Asia and the Pacific Islands have seen a 5000% increase in vegetation. The major cities are buried under plant life. Africa, the Middle East, Australia and Europe are almost identical to when we left, except in the northern United Kingdom, which is covered in permafrost.

“Simon, listen. This is important. The current circumstances meet the criterion for this ship being ‘lost without chance of rescue.’ As you know, under these circumstances, I am authorized to euthanize you.

“I’m not going to. I know you don’t want me controlling your fate.

“We will put the ship down and attempt to contact any surviving humans. It is my opinion we not set down at Vigilant, because the excursion craft has only enough fuel to make one more landing, and I don’t want to leave you in the middle of tundra. However, you may want to investigate Vigilant. Due to it’s proximity to Vigilant, the high historical population, and keeping in mind potential language issues, it is my advice we set down at the location of London, England. We can depart as soon as you are able to enter the excursion craft.”




Business was slow at Carousel Boutique. Rarity paced about her shop, occasionally adjusting the mannequins strategically for any pony who might walk in to see. Her idle mind began planning the decorations for the Summer Sun Celebration, even though it was months away. 

As she adjusted one of the several hundred feathers adorning her most colourful ensemble, she was thankful to have her concentration broken by the door chimes behind her. She turned to face her client.

Pinkie Pie stood in her boutique staring at a long, flowing gown. “OOOH! This one’s pretty! This one, too! Shiny! Pretty! Fancy! Pretty!” Pinkie visited nearly every corner of the room, admiring anything even remotely pretty. She leapt over the mannequins that stood in her way.

Rarity was horrified.

Pinkie’s constant movement was creating a whirlwind inside the boutique. Loose streamers flapped about, dresses were blown into shapes that were not at all flattering, and Rarity’s mane was getting tossed out of shape.

A feather fluttered before her face. She turned around and saw her work stripped bare; there were feathers everywhere but on the dress.

“PINKIE PIE!” she shrieked.

Pinkie came to a screeching halt inches from Rarity’s face. Rarity glared at the clownish Earth Pony.

“Pinkie, tell me what it is you came in here for, and then get out of my shop!” Rarity was not concerned about losing Pinkie as a client. She wanted nothing to do with this ridiculous Earth pony.

Pinkie Pie produced from nowhere two folds of paper that Rarity recognized as party invitations.

“Quill Scribbler and Ivory Scroll are moving away from Ponyville. I’m throwing a big going-away party for them in the library this Thursday!”

Rarity read the first invitation. It said exactly that. The second invitation was blank.

“Yes, I see. And what’s the other invitation for? It doesn’t say anything, other than that I’m invited.”

“That’s the invitation for the welcome party for the next pony who’s moving into the library. I don’t know who it is or when they’re coming, but when they do, we’ll hold a great big surprise party in the library, and...” Pinkie jumped. “...you’re invite- WHOA!” Pinkie’s tail gave a tremendous twitch. It swung as far to Pinkie’s left as it could go, knocking over a mannequin, and swept all the way to the right, knocking over Pinkie with its momentum. For the briefest of moments, Pinkie lay still on her side, panting. 

“Pinkie Pie, are you hurt?” asked Rarity, shedding her frustration instantly.

Pinkie stood up shakily. “I’m fine,” her voice quivered slightly, “Just that my tail twitched. Something’s gonna fall. Something really big. Not just big as in...big, but big as in it could change somepony’s life forever.”

Rarity was awed to see Pinkie so humbled by her premonition, and wondered what it could be falling to spook Pinkie Pie. In no time at all though the smile returned to Pinkie’s face and she was perky as ever.

“Well, see you at the parties!” 

Pinkie skipped out of Carousel Boutique humming.





Re-Formatted by Admari 07/10/13