"Come on, Sheldon! We've only been walking for five minutes. We aren't even outside Canterlot Square yet!" blurted Twilight.
"Well clearly, I'm too evolved for walking," Sheldon argued.
"Well he's clearly not too evolved for complaining," hissed Rainbow Dash, flying above the group.
Sheldon gazed up at Rainbow Dash and frowned. "You think you’re so clever? Well let me just tell you, while I do not currently have a scornful, sarcastic retort, you check your email periodically for a doozy."
Rainbow Dash stared at Sheldon with a bewildered expression, "My email? What are you even talking about?"
Sheldon paused for a moment, before he realized his mistake. "Ah, of course. My deepest apologies. For a moment there I completely forgot I was talking to domesticated, rainbow colored, farm animal."
Rainbow's nose scrunched up as she shoved her snout into the physicist's face, "What the hay did you just call me!?"
"I called you a horse,"stated Sheldon, dryly. "Although, judging from your physique, you do look more like a Pegasus."
Sheldon paused. "Here's an interesting fact about Pegasi. In Greek Mythology it's believed the hero Bellerophon, captured and enslaved your kind, with the intent of riding you into battle to combat a Chimera."
"What are you tryin' to say? You want to enslave me? I'd like to see you try!" threatened Rainbow Dash, flaring her wings.
Sheldon raised his eyebrow at the Pegasus with a confused expression, "No, I just educated you on Greek Mythology. What part of my previous statement did I mention a devious intent on enslaving you? That would be highly illegal, and we have laws for a reason."
"Whatever pal, you better watch your back," cautioned Rainbow Dash, as she turned around and took to the air once again.
"I don't need to watch my back, Sheldonopolis has a very low crime rate," Sheldon proclaimed.
Twilight sighed deeply from the front of the group, "Sheldon, we've been over this, we're in Equestria. Not 'Sheldonopolis'," she deadpanned.
"You're wrong," asserted Sheldon.
"No, you're wrong!" retorted Twilight.
Sheldon narrowed his eyes and frowned at the purple unicorn, "There is a fine line between wrong and visionary. Unfortunately you have to be a visionary to see it."
"What does that even mean!?" Twilight questioned, hopelessly.
Before Sheldon could respond, a distressed looking Rarity interrupted the conversation, "Um, I apologize for rudely interrupting your little chit chat, but I haven't attended to my dear Opal. I can hardly embark on this journey knowing precious Opalescence hasn't been fed, or more importantly groomed today, at all!"
Twilight gritted her teeth. Today really hadn't gone as planned, "Rarity... why didn't you mention this earlier? This means we have take the train all the way back to Ponyville!"
Rarity pawed at the ground, guiltily. "I'm terribly sorry Twilight, it just completely slipped my mind. I mean, you did come and wake me up at six o'clock in the morning. I simply didn't have time to feed my poor baby; and I most certainly didn't want to keep the Princess waiting."
"Who is Opal?" Sheldon interjected.
"My pet cat," explained the fashionista. "Poor Opalescence..." she trailed off. "Left alone to fend for herself in the boutique, with no food or water. She needs her mommy!"
Upon hearing the word 'cat' Sheldon's face morphed into an odd, almost creepy, goofy grin. "Ohh I love cats, they’re the epitome of indifference."
Rarity flinched slightly looking at Sheldon's face. It had just occurred to her, that she'd never seen Sheldon smile during his time in Equestria. Maybe that terrifying expression was the reason why. Regardless, she was pleased she now had something she could relate with the physicist.
"Well darling, it seems we share some common interests. I have to agree, cats are simply fabulous."
Sheldon nodded his head in agreement, "Cats make wonderful companions. They don't argue, or question my intellectual authority."
Rainbow Dash audibly grunted from the sky. She couldn't help by feel the last part of Sheldon's statement was somehow directed at her.
Rarity smiled with a hint of excitement. She enjoyed socializing and meeting new ponies very much, but every time she'd attempted to make conversation with Sheldon previously he would always seem very distant and uninterested. She felt a wave of pride wash over her, in knowing she had made progress with the strange creature.
"Darling, once this little errand is completed you simply must stop by my boutique, I'll introduce you to Opalescence. I'm sure you'll both get along just fine, she's so precious; I don't know what I'd do without her!"
Sheldon stroked the edge of his chin in contemplation, "Well... I'm not much for social interaction; especially with strangers. I would have to know a bit more about you before I could possibly commit to such a thing."
"Um... I suppose that's fair. Ask away!" That was unexpected but she didn't want to appear rude, and she would be lying if she said she didn't enjoy talking about herself.
Rainbow Dash sighed impatiently from above the group, "C'mon Rare! We have a job to do, we don't have time to play 'twenty questions' with the fur less ape."
Sheldon ignored the blue horse's comment and began his interrogation, "What is you're current profession; and what is you're favorite Amino acid?"
"I uh, well I work at-"
"My favorite is Lysine," interrupted Sheldon.
Rarity gave a small awkward smile before continuing with her previous statement, "Well, like I was saying. I work mostly as a fashion designer and a seamstress in my shop: The Carousel Boutique."
Sheldon narrowed his eyes at the unicorn as his expression turned from one of intrigue to one of disgust, "Oh dear... that's tragic. Here I thought I was talking to my intellectual equal, not a horse that makes dresses."
Rarity stood still, jaw agape. She tried forcing out words but they wouldn't come. She'd dedicated her entire existence towards designing clothing and to have her life's work so rudely dismissed like that, offended her greatly. The white unicorn could feel tears welling up in the corner of her eyes.
It was Fluttershy who eventually broke the silence.
"Rarity is actually good at making dresses... Uhmm, I would know because I'm kind of okay-ish at sewing and I uhh... I'll stop talking now... I'm sorry."
Sheldon couldn't hear a word the stupid yellow horse said, but he noticed Rarity's face etched with sorrow. Had he just accidentally insulted the horse? He didn't think so. He obeyed social protocol and was completely honest.
"Sheldon, do you have any idea how rude that was?" accused Twilight. "Rarity is one of the best fashion designers in Equestria. She's had her designs featured in countless fashion shows, and has many wealthy clients in Canterlot!"
Rarity managed a small smile, although it was hardly noticeable.
The gears in Sheldon's head finally clicked, and he realized the problem. There had been a huge misunderstanding here and he was going to set things straight.
"Ah, I understand the confusion," admitted Sheldon, as he turned to face the distraught Rarity. "I never said that you are not good at what you do. It’s just that what you do is not worth doing."
Sheldon's cheerful condescending smile, probably made that last statement seem infinitely more malicious than it was originally intended.
Rarity's agonized expression didn't change. In fact she looked even more crestfallen than before.
Applejack intervened before the situation got worse, "Ya'll should probably stop talkin' now sugarcube. Ah' realize you're tryin' to make amends, but Ah' don't think it's working."
The group faded into silence.
Twilight's ears perked up, at the distant harmonic sound of a lyre being played in the background. She smiled and gently hummed along to the tune.
Sheldon also noticed the sound and groaned in annoyance, "I dislike the sound of the lyre. Its overuse in classic television sitcoms always makes me think I’m going to experience a flashback from my past."
"It's melody does sound beautiful," admitted Rarity, in between sniffs. "Whoever is playing it must be incredibly talented."
"I second that, it's magnificent!" Twilight agreed, tilting her head to search for the musician responsible.
"It does sound familiar..." pondered Fluttershy.
"It sure does," acknowledged Twilight. "There's only one unicorn in Canterlot that I know of, that's that skilled with the lyre and that's-"
Twilight gulped as her eyes rested on the unicorn playing the instrument.
...Lyra
Lyra was sitting on a nearby bench, eyes glaring directly at Sheldon. Drool formed in the corners of her mouth as she continued playing her haunting melody, eyes wide open and completely still. Her stance and her very essence embodied the word 'creepy' as she sat. Playing her lyre. Watching Sheldon. She didn't even blink. Not even once.
"We need to leave, fast!" Twilight advised.
Lyra's lyre came to an abrupt ear screeching stop, as Twilight announced her intention to depart.
"Well thank god for that. I was beginning to develop symptoms of a migraine, listening to that nonsense," Sheldon exclaimed.
"Ah'm not following, what's the rush Twi?" queried Applejack.
"Lyra was part of that crowd demanding to see Sheldon back at Ponyville," Twilight explained, taking quick short glances at the mint colored unicorn, "I'm fairly sure she was the leader of the mob."
"No kiddin'..." Applejack murmured in disbelief.
"Umm, girls..." Fluttershy squeaked.
"What?" Twilight and Applejack repeated in unison.
Fluttershy was shaking, with her hoof extended out towards the bench Lyra once occupied.
"Where's Lyra?" the shy pegasus stammered.
The entire group minus Sheldon, simultaneously turned to face the bench. The empty bench, which sat calmly a few feet away. The ponies exchanged worried glances.
"We need to go, NOW!" Twilight ordered.
The group started picking up the pace, before eventually turning into an all out sprint for the train station. The entire group, except Sheldon that is.
"If you expect me to chase you, then you've misplaced your expectations, I don't run, nor do I have any intention of doing so."
Twilight groaned under her breath, as she turned around to see Sheldon walking slowly, ages behind the group. "Sheldon you don't have a choice! You're in danger, please run! We don't have time for this!"
Sheldon looked up at the sky meaningfully, as if contemplating the request. He eventually came to a conclusion.
"No."
"Just leave him, Twi," snorted Rainbow Dash. "If Celestia asks what happened, we'll just say he got lost."
"No, Rainbow Dash!" Twilight snapped. "You heard the Princess, we need him!"
"Pfft," Rainbow Dash remarked, as she ran on ahead of the group.
Twilight took a deep breath, before she stopped trotting and turned around to face the physicist, "Sheldon, you will get on this train, and you will start running right now! Because... the train..."
She clenched her eyes closed as she searched her brain for any excuse she could think of.
Sheldon remained motionless, with one eyebrow higher than the other, "Because?"
"Because... the train... has wi-fi! Yep, the train as wi-fi, let's go!" insisted Twilight.
Sheldon frowned, "And how is that going to assist me? You witnessed what the pink demon did to my laptop."
"B-but the Princess told me she fixed it for you, while me and the girls were getting ready," blurted Twilight.
"She installed Windows 8," complained Sheldon.
"So? It works now right!?" Twilight retorted.
"Well, yes. But-"
"SO WHAT IS THE PROBLEM!? JUST COME TO THE TRAIN AND USE THE STUPID WI-FI!"
"Windows 8 is much more user friendly than Windows 7," explained Sheldon.
"AND?" barked Twilight.
"And, I don't like that."
"I DON'T CARE, SHELDON. IT WORKS, PROBLEM SOLVED. NOW GET ON THIS TRAIN OR SO HELP ME CELESTIA I WILL DRAG YOU ON IT MYSELF!"
"Excuse me, but the problem is not solved," retaliated Sheldon. "If your head had been accidentally amputated and I transplanted a dog's head in it's place, would that be 'problem solved'?"
"It would be if it was your head," growled Twilight.
Before Sheldon had a chance to conjure up some verbal retribution, he felt something odd, on both his shoulders.
"Oh no..." uttered Twilight.
Sheldon glanced sideways and noticed a hoof on both his shoulders. A mint colored hoof, on both his shoulders.
"Hi, Sheldon," Lyra whispered into the back of his ears.
Lyra had abandoned her lyre and was now standing on her hindquarters, perked upright, using Sheldon's back for balance.
"Let him go, Lyra!" Twilight ordered.
Lyra ignored her, "How have you been Sheldon? It must be hard being stranded here all alone... I could take care of you."
She pushed her snout forward into Sheldon's hair and inhaled deeply.
"I appreciate the gesture, but I'm a theoretical physicist. I possess eidetic memory and an IQ of 187. I'm sure I'm capable of taking care of myself."
"Lyra, this is your last chance! I'm warning you... let him go," Twilight cautioned.
Once again, Lyra ignored the purple unicorn, "Of course you can take care of yourself, silly me... But, wouldn't it be nice to have a servant. Somepony to do anything you wanted, whenever you wanted it?"
Sheldon contemplated the question. He'd always wanted his own personal servant. He even had money locked away in his bank account, specifically to cover the costs of personal robots, whenever they got invented.
Lyra continued, "I could be that pony," she whispered sensually into Sheldon's ears.
"Lyra if you don't leave right now, I'm calling the guards!" Twilight threatened, once more.
After a moment of thought, Sheldon had come to a decision.
"I accept your proposal."
"WHAT!?" sputtered Twilight.
Lyra breathed a sigh of relief. She was overjoyed he had accepted on her own terms. She would have been so disheartened had he declined her offer. Not that it would have changed much, he would have came back with her one way or the other.
"I promise you Sheldon, I will take really good care of you. I will numb your pain with bliss and ecstasy. I will make your life paradise, as you will mine."
Lyra leaned forward and started kissing the back of Sheldon's neck.
"Dear lord! What do you think you're doing?" an irritated Sheldon demanded, as he shoved the unicorn off himself.
Lyra lost balance and collapsed into a muddy ditch on the floor. She looked up at Sheldon with pleading, tearful eyes.
"But... you said we could be together," she sniffed.
Sheldon ignored the filthy animal lying on the ground and held the back of his neck in discomfort, "I knew I should have had that vaccine last week! Think of all the germs that's just been transmitted! This is bad, really bad. I'm going to die!"
Twilight pushed Sheldon aside to glimpse at the unicorn on the ground. "Let me handle this Sheldon, you run along to the train."
"I can't afford to 'run along'. My body needs all the energy it has to fight the bacteria that's entered my bloodstream."
"Just go to the damn train Sheldon! I'll meet you and the others there in a second," urged Twilight.
"That's highly unlikely, only The Flash would be truly capable of travelling such a distance in a second."
Twilight slowly turned around her head and glared at Sheldon. No words were needed.
"But, I'll make my way there regardless of your incorrect statement," Sheldon quickly conceded. "See you 'in a second'." he remarked as he continued his slow walk to the train station.
Twilight stood tall over the dirty, sobbing pony lying in the mud. She couldn't help but feel bad for her. Lyra was a good pony, she had never acted like this before.
"Why, Lyra? What's gotten into you lately?"
Lyra didn't reply, tears streamed down her face and her eyes stung. She looked down at her own reflection in the mud and sighed.
Twilight waited for a few moments but the unicorn didn't talk.
"Goodbye Lyra," conceded Twilight, but as she turned to leave, a voice stopped her.
"Wait."
Twilight glanced back, "Yes, Lyra?"
"Tell Sheldon, I'm sorry..." she whimpered.
Twilight was silent for a few seconds. She didn't really expect that, but none the less she accepted the request.
"For what it's worth Lyra, I'm sorry too."
Lyra managed a weak smile and nodded her head.
Twilight turned her back and continued her short journey to the train station. She let out a sigh. Today had been a really, really bad day.
* * *
Twilight had finally arrived at the train station, and caught up with her friends.
Hopefully it'll all be smooth sailing from now on.
"You saw the sign, we don't have time! We have to get on this train, there's no other option!"
It seemed Twilight had to hold onto that thought a little longer.
"And let my poor baby Opal starve? Is that honestly what you're suggesting Rainbow Dash!? We are taking the train back to Ponyville and that's that!"
To make matters worse, an irritated looking Sheldon stood at the end of the platform, glaring at Twilight with a disapproving stare, "You said there was wi-fi here, where's the wi-fi? My laptop isn't picking up any wi-fi, why isn't that? You said it would!"
"Urghh, please Sheldon. I'm busy right now, please don't hassle me, please," Twilight begged.
"Did you lie, you lied didn't you!" accused Sheldon. "For what it's worth, my mother says that when we deceive for personal gain, we make Jesus cry."
"Please Sheldon, please stop." Twilight was growing weak.
"Rarity if we don't take this train to Zaros right now, who knows what will happen? Think of all the things Discord could be getting up to while we're wasting time in Ponyville, just to feed a cat for Pete's sake!"
Twilight's vision started to blur and she swayed from side to side, "Please stop arguing everypony... please..."
"Just to feed a cat? JUST TO FEED A CAT? Rainbow you are completely heartless, what if it was Tank in this situation?"
"Please..." murmured Twilight, helplessly.
"Hey! I know how to settle this argument," Pinkie chimed in from nowhere, "How about a rap battle!"
"What's a rap battle?" asked Fluttershy.
Twilight stood there powerlessly, she was feeling sick. It's as if the whole world was falling apart.
This isn't happening, this is just a bad dream
Twilight's state of denial wasn't an issue for long, as for the second time this week. She collapsed onto the floor.
Unconscious.