//------------------------------// // Braeburn's Idea: Party // Story: Proposal Problems // by PhonyPony //------------------------------// The walk to Sweet Apple Acres had pure awkwardness emanating from the two lovebirds. Fluttershy carried the misleading cake the rest of the way there, while Big Macintosh simply said nothing. His mug portrayed feelings of sadness and hopelessness. “Um, are you all right, Big Macintosh?” Fluttershy never wanted to see her coltfriend with that face. The stallion breathed out a sigh. “Whatever’s eating you up, I want to know. You can tell me.” The marefriend wrapped a foreleg around the farmpony. Big Mac breathed out another sigh. Fluttershy pressed on. “Please tell me. I’d do anything to make you feel better.” A tiny smile emerged from Big Mac. Ah’m so lucky that a mare like her cares about me so much. “Don’t worry about it, sugarcube. You’ll find out eventually.” “Well, as long as you tell me later, then that’s fine.” They continued their walk until they finally reached the Apple household. As they opened the door, the duo was greeted with a “Congratulations!” Applejack, Apple Bloom, Granny Smith, and Braeburn shouted and cheered. “It finally happened, Apple Bloom!” screamed an ecstatic Applejack. “Ah know, Ah can’t believe it!” Apple Bloom continuously jumped up and down, joyous of her new sister-in-law. Granny Smith wiped a tear from her eye. “Ah’m so glad that Ah lived to see this day!” Braeburn sped forward and shook Fluttershy’s hooves. “We waited so long for this to happen, Fluttershy! This is such a special occasion, let’s celebrate!” “Wow, you all must really love this cake,” uttered Fluttershy, confused by their excitement. “Say what now?” exclaimed the Apple Family, minus Big Macintosh. Braeburn turned around to the crimson stallion. “BM, did it happen again?” “Eeyup.” The lively atmosphere dissipated and the entire Apple Family frowned, saddened by Big Mac’s proposal problems. “Is everypony okay?” Fluttershy didn’t want to see her coltfriend and his family upset. Because he didn’t want the dinner to be ruined, the yellow stallion perked up. “Of course we are! Thanks for bringin’ the cake!” Braeburn grabbed a hold of Big Macintosh. “Y’all enjoy dinner while Big Mac and Ah talk at the barn.” The two stormed off. “Okay, let’s eat cake,” mumbled the pink-maned pegasus. “Uh, sure thing,” responded Applejack, awkwardly. ------- Big Macintosh lied down on a seemingly comfortable bale of hay. “You told the family?” His voice had a disappointed tone. “Ah’m sorry, BM. Ah thought your proposal would work this time.” The depressed farmpony turned his back on his cousin. “Well, it didn’t.” “This is all Carrot’s fault!” yelled Braeburn. “No, it ain’t!” Big Macintosh’s voice briefly changed to a threatening tone, but it swiftly regressed back to depressing. “Ah know that Carrot didn’t mean to mess up. Ah don’t blame him, Ah already failed twice. Maybe this is Celestia’s way of tellin’ me that Ah’m not Fluttershy’s special somepony.” Braeburn desperately tried to cheer up his saddened cousin. “Don’t say that, BM! You two love each other and you know it! How about Ah remind you of our family’s special attributes?!” “Apples?” guessed the ‘you can’t spell depressed without red’ stallion. “No! Honesty and attractiveness! You’re good-lookin’, Ah’m good-lookin’, Applejack’s good-lookin’, our whole family’s good lookin’! We’re totally hot!” The cowpony wiggled his flank to emphasize their hotness. “We’re honest too, so you know Ah’m tellin’ the truth!” “Thanks for the compliment cuz, but that’s not goin’ to help me. Fluttershy ain’t a shallow pony that makes decisions based on somepony’s looks.” “Ah know that, she loves you for you! You’re kind, caring, strong, and you’re the best applebucker in the family! Get off your lazy ass and realize that!” Braeburn’s rant invigorated Big Macintosh, releasing him from his depression. The stallion stood up, tall and proud. “You’re right! Ah am all those things you said! Ah will propose to Fluttershy! Braeburn, what’s your idea?!” “Great to have ya back, BM! Ah suggest havin’ a party tomorrow and proposin’ in front of everypony. It shows that you’re not afraid of anything, not even in front of a large crowd.” “Ah like the idea cuz, but can we really organize a party by tomorrow?” Big Mac doubted his cousin’s plan. “Of course we can! Carrot and Ah will handle catering, and Ah know a certain pony that can help with party planning.” “Okay, but make sure it ain’t as crazy as last time.” A terrifying flashback entered the farmpony’s mind. “WE CRANK THAT BASS UP TO 11 AND IT DESTROYS THE BOREDOM AT A MICROSCOPIC LEVEL! YEEEAAHHH!” Vinyl Scratch raised the volume. Thanks to the power of wubs, everypony literally raised the roof, thus destroying the barn, again. “We fixed the barn!” Braeburn defended, “Besides, Vinyl paid for the damages! This party won’t be as hectic, Ah promise. You can rely on me BM, Ah guarantee that tomorrow night, Fluttershy will finally say ‘yes’ to your proposal!” ------- Celestia raised the sun, and Twilight Sparkle began to rise from her slumber. As she rose, she listened to the birds chirping and the peacefulness of the surrounding area. Her mane protruded from all directions, yet her environment was in perfect serenity. “TWILIGHT!!!!!” Spike shouted from downstairs in order for his caretaker to hear him. The called mare shrieked at the dragon’s exclamation. “What is it?!” “Pinkie Pie’s here to tell you something!” “Ugh, I’ll be there!” Twilight limped downstairs, obviously distressed by the destruction of her peaceful morning. “Yes, Pinkie?” “Hi Twilight! I just came here to tell you that there’s going to be a party at Sweet Apple Acres today!” The party mare gave two invitations, one for each resident. “Be there, something really amazing is going to happen!” “Awesome! Can we go, Twilight?” Spike was eager to go to another party at the barn, especially since the last one. “Of course we can, but Pinkie, why didn’t you do your singing telegram?” “It poops me out, that’s why! See you at the party, Twilight!” Pinkie Pie bounced away to deliver the other invitations. ------- The party, as Braeburn promised, was not as outrageous as the last. At most, only 30 ponies attended. “Aw man!” Spike kicked the ground, making hay fly in front of him. “I wanted to have fun.” Twilight comforted her number one assistant. “Don’t say that, Spike. The music’s nice, all our friends are here, and there’s going to be a surprise at the end. It’s a fun party.” Spike crossed his arms. “I guess.” “How about I buy you some food to make you feel better?” The purple unicorn pointed to two concession stands. One ran by Mr. Cake, and the other by Braeburn. The dragon jumped up, excited about the news. “Really?! Thanks Twilight!” She trotted to Braeburn’s stand and brought out three bits. “One slice of pie please.” “Sure thing, Ms. Sparkle.” The yellow stallion took her bits and dished out the fresh apple pie. “Enjoy the party.” “Thank you, Braeburn.” As soon as Twilight left the stand, the cowpony turned to the adjacent stand. “In your face, Carrot! I just proved that pies are better than cakes!” The lanky baker was displeased. “Oh hush up, the party just started! Later, I’ll prove that my cakes are superior to your pies! I need to redeem myself for ruining the proposal!” Braeburn spoke in a condescending way. “That’s real honorable of you, but it ain’t gonna help you one bit! After all, Ah have POOP on my side.” “POOP?” “POOP: Ponies Order Our Pies. That’s why pies are better!” ------- Meanwhile, Caramel conversed with Big Macintosh. “Ready to do this?” “Eeyup. Ah’m confident that Ah will finally ask Fluttershy to marry me.” “Well, good luck. It looks like you’re really going to need it this time. I think that something bad is going to happen again. Something that’s worse than the last two results.” “Like what?” The crimson farmpony began to worry slightly. ------- Outside the barn doors stood two devious-looking unicorns, one of them carrying an unknown bottle. They appeared to be… singing? Well lookie what we got here, brother of mine, it’s a party in a barn Ponies having fun, dancing around, and not even giving a single darn Maybe they’re not aware that they will soon be in a teary despair That the key that we need to ruin the Apple’s party you and I do bear Well we've got opportunity In this very community He’s Flim, he’s Flam, we’re the world famous Flim Flam Brothers Travelling salesponies nonpareil I suppose by now you’re wondering, ‘bout this peculiar dark green bottle I say, our revenge against the Apples And I suppose by now you’re wondering, how will we ruin their party? Any horse can make a claim and anypony can do the same But my brother and I have something most unique and superb Unseen at any time in this big new world And that’s opportunity Folks, it’s the one and only, the biggest and the best The unbelievable Unimpeachable Indispensable I can’t believe-able Flim Flam Brothers’ Super Dizzy Drunky Cider 6000 Yeah! The two salesponies ceased their catchy song and began a normal conversation. “Brother, we can completely ruin the Apple Family’s shindig thanks to this Double D cider!” boasted Flim, holding up the bottle in question. “That’s very clever, Flim!” exclaimed Flam, somehow understanding the reference. “This cider can instantly intoxicate anypony foalish enough to drink it. Let’s sneak in and pour it in the punch bowl!” The mustachioed one objected. “Perhaps we should use our magic to mix it in instead of sneaking around like some hoodlums. After all, we don’t want to get caught now, do we?” “I suppose you’re right.” “Ready Flim, ready Flam, let’s bing-bang-zam!” sang the red-and-white maned ponies in unison. A beam was shot from their green-glowing horns and it struck the bottle. Instantaneously, the Super Dizzy Drunky Cider 6000 fused with the normal punch with nopony noticing. “Let’s leave, Flim. We already know that the party will be a disaster now.” “Right, brother!” With their plan a success, the Flim Flam Brothers escaped unharmed. “Flam, I tripped!” ------- “Pinkie Pie, I absolutely adore this lovely party!” Rarity, along with the other Elements of Harmony, formed their own circle at the center of the barn. “But why, if I may ask, are we having one?” Rainbow Dash joined the interrogation. “Yeah Pinkie. This party’s cool and all, but why now?” “And what’s this amazing thing that’s going to happen?” questioned Twilight. “Sorry everpony, but I can’t tell any of you, especially Flutershy.” Pinkie Pie pretended to zip her mouth shut. “Especially me, why?” asked the yellow pegasus. The three mares weren’t satisfied with Pinkie’s answer. Suddenly, their eyes shot a piercing glare to Applejack. Rainbow Dash gave a sly smile. “I bet you know why we’re having this party AJ, after all, this is your family’s barn.” “Uh…” This is it Applejack! Ah can’t believe you’re going to do this, but you have to lie to your friends. Just because you’re the Element of Honesty doesn’t mean you can’t tell a lie. You can do it! This will be the greatest lie you ever told! “IT’S NOT BECAUSE BIG MACINTOSH IS GOING TO PROPOSE TONIGHT!” Dang it! Everypony gasped except Pinkie, who did a facehoof. Rarity was the first to speak. “How romantic! To be swept off your feet by your knight in front of everypony! It shows how Big Macintosh’s love for Fluttershy has no bounds! Ooh, congratulations on being the first one of us to be married, Fluttershy!” Fluttershy blushed. “Wow, I didn’t know, but I’m so happy that Big Macintosh and I are about to be engaged. We love each other so much, it only makes sense that this would happen eventually.” Fluttershy started breathing heavily. “Are you okay?” asked Rainbow Dash. “Oh I’m just excited. Maybe a drink would be nice. Can you get me one, Rainbow?” “Sure thing.” ------- “Take that, Braeburn! I just sold my ninth cake today!” “What a coincidence, Carrot, Ah just sold my tenth pie!” Carrot Cake was steaming mad. “That’s it! How about we prove which is better once and for all: cakes or pies?” Braeburn squinted his eyes. “You’re on.” ------- Caramel talked to a former classmate of the gang at the corner of the barn. He didn’t remember his name, but his appearance was obviously an older version of their former acquaintance. “Have you been doing well since high school?” pried the amber stallion. “YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!” “CARAMEL!” roared two of the pony’s best friends. “Sorry, old buddy, but I have to leave now. Somepony’s calling me.” Caramel galloped away until he finally reached the source of the shout. “Hey guys, what’s up?” “Braeburn and I want you to try a slice of my cake and a slice of his pie. We’re tired of arguing. The dispute will end solely based on your decision.” “Wow, thanks for trusting me, guys. I’ll do it.” A crowd started to form around Caramel. Apparently, a lot of ponies cared about the Cakes vs. Pies debate. Carrot and Braeburn each presented a plate in front of their shy friend. First, he slowly ate the cake. His eyes went wide open on the first bite, a seemingly good sign. Then, he carefully consumed the apple pie. “Tastes pretty good,” complimented Caramel. Once he swallowed the last bite, the dark-maned pony had decided. The attendees leaned forward, anticipating what he would say. Will it be cakes, or pies? “Sorry, but I think they’re both equally delicious.” Everypony’s jaw dropped. “Well, that settles it! Our food, as Caramel said, is equally delicious. No more fighting Braeburn.” Carrot brought his hoof out in agreement. “Agreed!” Instead of a hoofshake, Braeburn gave a hoofbump, thus ending the feud. Caramel shrugged. “Honestly, I’m more of a muffin stallion.” “You are?!” screamed a certain cross-eyed mare in a lovey-dovey tone. ------- “… AND THEN I SAID, ‘yay!’” Fluttershy swayed back and forth, occasionally stumbling every time. “AND THEN I SAID, ‘yay,’ AGAIN!” “Fluttershy, dear, are you feeling all right?” asked a worried Rarity. The pegasus hiccupped. “Oh, I feel great! The love of my life is going to propose tonight! I can’t wait!” Fluttershy finished her cup of spiked punch. “This punch is wonderful! One more, Rainbow!” “Are you sure? That’s your fifth one.” “ANOTHER!” ------- Big Macintosh walked to Vinyl Scratch. “It’s time.” “Got it.” Vinyl stopped the music and gathered everypony’s attention. “Okay party ponies! First of all, let’s thank Pinkie Pie for organizing this awesome party!” Multiple hoots and hollers were heard by the audience. “Aw shucks. Thank you! Thank you all!” shouted a bashful Pinkie. “And now, we have an important announcement from our host, Big Macintosh!” The DJ shifted the attention to Big Mac. “Fluttershy, Ah love you, and Ah wanna spend mah entire life with you. That’s why Ah want to ask,” Big Macintosh got down on his knees and brought out the gold hoof ring, “Will you marry me?” The barn was silent. All eyes focused on Fluttershy. “Yes,” slurred the intoxicated mare. She said ‘yes’! Everypony cheered for the couple, congratulating both of them on their relationship. Rarity especially screamed the loudest. Big Macintosh joyfully jumped around the barn. “It finally happened! Fluttershy and Ah are going to get married! Braeburn was right! Caramel was wrong!” And then Fluttershy fainted. ------- The next day, Fluttershy woke up and didn’t remember anything about the day before. Not wanting to simply tell her about the proposal and how she somehow got drunk, Big Macintosh told Caramel to convince everypony to never talk about the party. Door by door, Caramel went to every pony that witnessed the proposal. They all agreed to never mention the event in front of Fluttershy to prevent her memory from returning. For some reason, a grey pegasus followed Caramel the entire time.