Just in case you forgot... I OWN NOTHING!!!
Chapter 8
‘Thought’
“Dialogue”
“Words in a foreign language.”
“Quoting in thought”
***
I stared at the purple annoying unicorn sitting across the room from me. She was levitating a pair of clean, well-made khaki shorts. The levitation was nothing new, I had seen her do it many times to take notes, move things around or just throw a tantrum like with the cot yesterday. What was new was that she was offering me the shorts like she expected me to just take them. I slowly reached out for them, chains rattling as they slowly drew taught. I grunted with effort; three weeks of just sitting in this cell with barely any room to move and little protein had led to a little bit of atrophy in my muscles. That and the chains were always just plain heavy.
As I touched them, I half expected her to snatch them away and demand some test or another chance to poke around in places no one had any right to be poking around in. I pulled on them gently and to my surprise, she just let me have them; they slipped into my grasp with barely a tug. I pulled on the waist band a little making sure they were the correct size. They were perfect as pants with no elastic can be; they did not have pockets or a zipper, instead looking more like a pair of boxer shorts made of thick fabric. I tugged them on quickly slipping my legs through the holes and pulling them up around my waist. There was no belt, but there was a short length of a rope like material, which I quickly tied tightly around my middle. The effect was almost like flipping a switch in my brain and I slumped down, now feeling like I could relax without anyone staring at my junk. “Ahh… thank God.” A little of the pent up stress seemed to drift away and the world was just a little more right than it was a few minutes before.
I stretched out on the warm stone floor, the mare across from was smiling as she quickly scribbled her notes with that telekinesis pen trick she does. After a few minutes she raised a hoof to her... muzzle? Mouth? I’ll just say mouth. She raised a hoof to her mouth and coughed gently and pointed to the little pyramid of blue crystal she had sitting on the table and I had learned this was a sign that she wanted to talk. I sat up crossing my legs and waited for her to make the first move.
“Are you… increasing…. comfortably now?” The words came out of the little blue pyramid haltingly and nothing about what she spoke and the way her mouth moved lined up right, she looked like she was in a very badly dubbed Asian film and I couldn’t help but chuckle a little. It didn’t take much thought to figure out she had meant “Are you more comfortable now?” instead of the jumbled mess that came out, but even the best computers had a habit of screwing up voice recognition so it didn’t surprise me.
“Yes I am much more comfortable now,” I replied. My voice came out of the little blue pyramid sounding scratchy and wheezy but it was still in that weird language they spoke. The thing must have sounded a little funny because she frowned and her horn lit up for a few seconds.
Is this the way they interact with their computers? If it was, then it was no wonder I could not see any familiar features I associated with human style machinery.
“Could repeat phrase… please?” I winced a little at the terrible translation. Well, at least she has got it getting the proper point across. I was much less aggravated now that I was covered up and I decided to humor her a little. Treat others the way you wish to be treated. The phrase was like a mantra, calming my ire just enough to get on with things.
“Yes, I am much more comfortable now,” I said again, trying to match my voice and tone with my previous words. Once again, her horn lit up for a few seconds, and my eyes fell to the little crystalline computer she is tinkering with. The strange markings seemed to swim and change shape under my eyes; each time she interacted with it, the marks became sharper and more distinct. The whole thing struck me as amazingly advanced. Funny how a species of cute pastel horses could create computers that operate inside of a crystalline structure and use only what seems to be a wireless brain or machine interface. Ugh, I am such a tech nerd, I think as I catch myself drooling over the thought of video games played totally in my head.
“How do I sound now?” came her voice from the little pyramid.
“Hey, you sound much better now… How do I sound to you?” I replied, my eyebrows climbing into my hairline, which had grown a pretty long so they didn’t have very far to move.
“Much improved, still a little strange, but I’ll…. better… it,” the pyramid hiccupped.
“Still a little glitchy…” I remark offhandedly and to my surprise she giggled.
“What, what did it make me say?” I questioned, wondering what was so funny.
“Ah, something like “Little bit Cheesy.”” She giggled again and I rolled my eyes. Stupid thing, well… at least we can have something approaching a conversation now.
Just as the unicorn was about to say something else, the door creaked open and in poked the head of none other than the spear wielding jerk that landed me in this mess.
“Well if it isn’t short n’ ugly,” I casually remark as I stretch back out onto the warm stones.
Something of what I said must have translated correctly because after the blue pyramid had translated, the unicorn was looking like she was trying not to laugh and the jerk looked plenty pissed.
“Princess Celestia is… arrived… to see you,” he quickly said to Twilight and hurriedly backed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
Who is that again? Obviously someone really important cause the unicorn lady is suddenly looking really nervous.
***
The bright glow around Celestia’s horn slowly dimmed as the sun trudged into the morning sky, a slow start to its long march across the heavens. The white alicorn stretched and a short series of pops echoed into the quiet of her bedroom. She yawned and stretched once more, before making her way over to her wardrobe. She always liked her bedroom, she had claimed this space only days after Canterlot Castle was finished and she hadn’t moved since. The inside of her room was dim in the mornings, the low light making the rich burgundy furniture look almost black. Some of it had been here for nearly as long as she herself had, making a few of the pieces well over a thousand years old. The wardrobe was one such piece; she remembered it was given to her as a housewarming present from her own non-alicorn bloodline.
Her mood was far improved from the previous day. The dark feelings from the Everfree City had quieted and now were little more than a tiny prick on the edge of her senses. She knew deep down that this did not mean the threat was over, but it was apparent that the threat was not imminent. Whatever force had gathered all of that power in the Everfree must have expended it on something and, judging by the lack of disasters, it would be some time before anything came of it.
Celestia opened the finely made door and levitated her regalia out of the wardrobe’s dark depths. The golden yoke and her tiara settled gracefully in their proper places, followed shortly by her gilded shoes. She took a moment to examine herself in the mirror built into the back of the door and frowned. A brush followed her regalia out of the wardrobe, and she ran it through her unruly, pink mane. Her natural hair color was one of her most closely guarded secrets, simply because she never really liked such a pale shade of the color. Now Fluttershy, that mare had a nice shade of pink. Celestia sighed; no use being jealous of the Element of Kindness, it would probably just make Fluttershy feel bad if Celestia even joked that she was envious of her mane.
With her rebellious, lacklustre, pink monster tamed for the moment, she took a deep breath and with a whoosh, like a flame suddenly catching a gas burner, her normal hair style returned. She smiled at herself in the mirror, now this was more like it! She winked at herself and trotted to her chamber door. The thick wooden door opened with a flash of magic and she headed out into the hallway. She looked both directions, checking for anypony who might catch her. With nopony in sight, she bumped the door closed with her flank in a manner not at all becoming of a royal princess and giggled to herself as she headed off to breakfast with her sister.
Celestia nodded gracefully to the third set of guards she had passed since getting up that morning. Ugh, that gesture was making her get a crick in her neck. She entered the brightly lit royal dining hall where she and her sister Luna usually took meals together. She approached her seat next to the hunched form of her sister, who by the look of things, was poring over yesterday’s report on the alien items recovered when they had captured their equally alien owner, all the while munching on a cinnamon bun.
“Well good morning dear sister, still obsessed with the latest reports I see,” Celestia casually remarked as she slid into her seat next to her nocturnal sibling.
“Hmm,” Luna responded with a noncommittal hum, barely registering the presence of her older sister.
Celestia was a little annoyed at being completely ignored; just as she was about to ignore her sister in return, a devious idea struck her. She smiled and began to slowly munch on a small salad. “So Lulu, I was thinking, wouldn’t it just be the grandest idea to open the gates of Tartarus today? Just to air it out a bit, it has to be dreadfully stuffy in there by now,” she remarked in her best imperial tone.
“Mmm,” Luna responded, still absorbed in her reading.
“Then I was thinking, I could release Discord and ask him if he would turn the moon into cheese… followed by lunch. I was thinking about making some grilled cheese sandwiches. Does that sound good to you?” Celestia continued, still able to keep her voice from betraying her grin.
“Mmmhmm,” Luna answered, taking a small bite of her cinnamon bun, totally oblivious.
Celestia kept her laughter quiet as she finished her breakfast, before swapping Luna’s bun with a rolled up napkin and excusing herself. Celestia walked out of the room, munching on her pilfered pastry.
Luna ‘Hmm’ed’ again, still automatically responding to anyone who may have been speaking to her at the time. She remained completely oblivious until she made to take another bite of her breakfast, only to get a mouth full of linen instead. She looked at the napkin in shock for a moment, finally looking over to her sister’s empty seat…
“H-HEY!!! I WAS EATING THAT!!! TIA!?! TIIIAAAAA!!!”
Celestia giggled to herself as Luna’s voice echoed down the marble corridors. She still had about an hour until morning court had to begin and while teasing her sister was funny, it wasn’t really what she would call a fulfilling diversion. Suddenly an idea struck her; she would go and check up on the situation in Ponyville! Twilight’s recent report would make the perfect excuse to make sure everything was going well with Twilight’s studies. But first, she needed to make a stop at the Academy.
***
Professor Crystal Beaker watched over her assistants as they performed their various duties. The large, auditorium-like room was packed with various magical equipment and devices, pony researchers to operate them, as well as the large hulk that was the strange machine the alien creature (designated Subject E) was operating at the time of its capture. Today’s agenda was a full spectrum thermic materials breakdown of the odd machine. Ponies ran this way and that in the giant room, scribbling down readings on note pads or descriptions of parts that had been removed from the mysterious apparatus. It was all a storm of chaotic trial and error. New discoveries were happening right in front of her eyes; it was science in its most volatile state and she reveled in it.
A loud buzzing caught Crystal Beaker’s attention and she turned her eyes to the source. The results from the analysis were coming in, sheets of parchment being roughly scribbled on by the copy spell making a harsh buzzing noise from the machine. Her horn lit up and she took the parchment with her magic, levitating it over to read the results. She skimmed over the almost two page long section of unknown materials to arrive at the elements or substances they could identify.
“Iron, rubber, lead, sulfuric acid,” she mumbled to herself as she read off the massive list of materials.
“Silicon, zinc….. aluminum, hmmm.” That was odd, why would anyone make anything out of such a difficult to smelt, semi-precious material? Wouldn’t the cost of this amount be prohibitive?
“Rhodium and palladium.” Those were rare... and valuable, but there were only fractions of a featherweight. She skimmed to the bottom of the list, where a single entry caught her eye.
“What? That’s impossible…” Crystal said to herself. She looked around for a trustworthy student; she needed to confirm this before she got too excited.
“Ah! Miss Burner?” Crystal called to a bright blue mare standing across the room.
“Yes, do you need something Professor Beaker?”
“Could you be a dear and re-run section eight of the analysis? I need something confirmed,” The professor called.
“Do you need me to look for something specific?” Miss Burner asked, now a little curious as to why a section of the test had to be done again.
“No!.. Ehrm, no Miss Burner, the section just seemed a little anomalous, so if you would please rescan section eight.” Crystal Beaker almost choked on her own nervousness, if that test was right it would change things… lots of things, and she wasn’t about to lose this opportunity.
A few moments passed as the student, a Miss Bunsen Burner, re-ran the scan. After only a few seconds more the new piece of parchment was spat out of the machine. Professor Beaker ignored most of the sheet, eyes locking onto the one number that had the potential to change so much. Yes! The readings were accurate! She couldn’t help but laugh out loud in glee.
Almost two featherweight of platinum.
Author’s note: Celestia is such a troll in this chapter. And I've already started on chapter nine, so no need to worry about that.
Co-author’s note: Platinum is now a thing. You’re welcome. Again. I’m going to enjoy thinking of ways to screw with Celestia and the Academy as this thing goes on. Bwahaha.
-Admari