Pinkie Pie pulled back on the lever, hearing a familiar click as it reached its resting point. The slats in front of her opened, bathing the cockpit in light. Gripping the joystick between two hooves, Pinkie tilted forward. The mech began to move, awkwardly at first, but it soon gained momentum and a modicum of grace.
It was bipedal, with a bulbous torso, no head, and two arms that ended in cannons. Pink was the primary colour, with a few streaks of light blue and yellow – Pinkie’s idea, of course. It had been built using the strange machine from space that ha d crash-landed near Hollow Shades a few years ago.
Shortly after the crash, the other machines had come. Machines like the ones the forge built. Princess Celestia had ordered the mechs from the forge be used to combat the plague of aliens. Unfortunately, the power source had proven to be an issue. As a result, a unicorn was required to power each mech.
Pinkie’s unicorn was Trixie. She hadn’t liked the idea at first, given her previous engagements with Trixie, but she had reluctantly agreed. Trixie had proven to be a good companion, however, and Pinkie had forged a tentative friendship with her.
“Is everything okay on your end?” Trixie asked, voice filtering through the radio.
“Everything’s peachy-keen,” Pinkie said. “We’re at one hundred percent! Time to show these guys who’s boss!”
“These guys” were a pair of alien mechs. Unlike the mechs the ponies used, these were quadrupedal. A single cannon was mounted on their back, and they scuttled about like crabs.
One “crab” noticed Pinkie’s mech, and fired at her. The shell impacted harmlessly a couple dozen meters away, showering the area in dirt. The shells they fired were called “depleted uranium” by the eggheads. Pinkie hadn’t the slightest what that meant, and she intended to keep it that way.
Unlocking the left arm, Pinkie aimed her auto-cannon at the crab that had fired at her. Squeezing the trigger, she unleashed a barrage of bullets. Most pinged off the crab’s hard armour plating, but a few found their way in to the softer mechanisms beneath. From these conduits blue fluid squirted out.
“Banana nut muffins!” Pinkie swore. “We’re gonna need something better, Trixie! Power up the streamers!”
“Got it,” crackled the radio.
The screen showing the power levels flashed as the auto-cannon lost power and the launcher on the right gained that same power. With a giggle, Pinkie unlocked the right arm and aimed it at the same crab. She squeezed the trigger-
-and a rocket burst from the launcher arm, spiraling towards the crab. After on a split-second – though it seemed longer – the rocket struck home, destroying the crab. Pieces of its metal hide bounced off the ground.
The second crab paused to fire a shell at Pinkie. Unlike the first shell, this one actually hit, tearing the launcher arm clean off. Wires dripping with blue fluid hung limply from the stump.
“Trixie I need power back to the auto-cannon,” Pinkie said. When there was no response, she tapped the comm speaker. “Trixie?”
Still no response.
Pinkie unstrapped herself from her chair and hopped down, poking her head down to the reactor. Trixie laid there in her little plastic womb, a pained grimace on her face. The jolt from the sudden removal of the arm had knocked her unconscious.
She swung herself back onto the chair with a determined scowl. She was going to beat this thing, by Geoffrey, or her name wasn’t Pinkamena Diane Pie!
Her mech took a leap forward, jets on its feet propelling it. The crab paused again, and was about to fire another round at her when she rammed it. The mech raised its arm up, then bought it crashing down again. It did it again and again and again.
“I’m Pinkie Pie!” she shouted, slamming the shell of the crab.
Slam!
“And nopony-”
Slam!
“-hurts-”
Slam!
“-my-”
Slam!
“-friends!”
She brought the arm hammering down one final time. The crab shattered, leaving a pile of debris beneath her feet.
“Horse apples!” Trixie snapped.
“What?”
“You get to be the hero and I get knocked out? What kind of story is that?!”
Pinkie shrugged. “Well I thought it was a neato story.”