The Last Laugh

by Waffle134


Chapter 3

Discord couldn’t help but smile as he saw the looks of complete shock on the three royalty standing before him. Today had been a good day; he had escaped the Elements, conquered Equestria, and travelled across the world doing what he did best, spreading chaos. But he was now faced with something he would never escape; he was growing bored. Oh, how he hated boredom! At least he would never grow tired of taking his playthings by surprise. He had always cherished his role as puppetmaster. He hadn’t planned to interfere so early, but what was a little fun here and there?

“What is this sorcery!” Chrysalis demanded.

Discord stood in the now open doorway, flaunting the new form of a stone Changeling. “Oh, I just thought I’d try out a new body. It’s rather boring using the same one all the time, and there were so many of these lying around it would have been a shame not to use one.”

Chrysalis began shouting at Discord. “You will pay for this, cretin! Do you think you can come into my kingdom and use my subjects’-”

A zipper appeared on the side of the Changeling Queen’s mouth, quickly zipping her mouth closed, leaving only the angry muffled cries of Queen Chrysalis’ tirade.

Ignoring her, Discord turned to face Celestia and Luna. “I see you’ve made a new friend! Or at least a new ‘enemy of my enemy.’” He emphasized the last words with air quotes.

“You’ve always been one to underestimate friendship, Discord,” Celestia said. Her horn glowed and her golden aura disintegrated the zipper closing Chrysalis’ mouth.

“-you with a rusty knife!” the Changeling Queen finished, falling into silence.

“You know what? You’re right. I have always underestimated the power of friendship!” He smiled. “That’s why I decided to make a few friends of my own.” Dozens of blue eyes appeared in the darkness of the shadowy doorway behind Discord. As he walked casually forward, a large swell of stone Changelings marched into the room behind him, forming line upon line of dark statues, painted a sickly green by the torches.

“My subjects!” Chrysalis shouted. “Attack this fool who would dare encroach upon my kingdom!” The Changelings didn’t react to her voice. “I am your Queen! Do as I say!” She was only met with Discord’s laugh.

“Oh ho, they’re mine now, Chrisy,” Discord said. “A little reanimation spell here and there does wonders for making an army.” He gestured towards the rows of stone Changelings behind them. “Technically they’re still just statues, so don’t feel bad or anything if you break a few of them.” Seeing Chrysalis’ anger, he gave an off smile, his one fang protruding awkwardly from his mouth. “If it helps, I used to be a statue. Not too bad really.” He yawned, stretching slightly. “You just feel a little stiff in the morning.” He waved his hoof forward and the Changelings began to advance.

The Changelings circled the three, snarling menacingly. Celestia, Luna, and Chrysalis were forced to stand back to back, facing the packed circle of Changelings that stood all around them. Discord walked around the packed group and sat himself on the black throne. “I hope you don’t mind if I watch. Nothing screams chaos like a good fight.” He nestled on top of the throne, resting his head on his claw. “Ok, go ahead. Amuse me.”

On cue, the Changelings leaped at the three, burying the Queen and Sisters beneath a pile of stone bodies. For a few seconds, nothing happened. Discord couldn’t help but feel disappointed, was it already over? He was hoping for something a little more… actiony. But beneath the cold pile a bright light began to build, and with a fiery flash the attacking Changelings were scattered about the room. Discord’s face lit up, he knew it wouldn’t be that easy!

Gradually, the Changelings picked themselves up off the ground. Several Changelings had shattered as they impacted the wall, but their numbers were still overwhelming.

“Yes!” Discord said, laughing upon his throne. “Give ‘em the old one-two!”

“I don’t know if I can do that again,” Celestia said, ignoring Discord’s jeers. She was breathing heavily with her head slightly lowered, as if she was having trouble holding it up.

“Don’t let them surround us!” Luna shouted, eyes glowing as she stared down the approaching Changelings. Standing between Chrysalis and Celestia, she spread her wings out, shielding them both. She slowly walked backwards, guiding the three of them to the edge of the throne room. They backed up to the wall, facing the changeling horde.

“There are so many…” Celestia said in awe.

“Come sister, put away thy fears,” Luna said, her face resolute and determined. “Thou told me we must complete our task or die trying.”

Celestia braced herself for the next attack.

Like a stony wave, the Changelings rushed forward. The wave crashed against the wall that the Princesses and Queen formed. Celestia’s horn flared, blasting a large swath of Changelings to her left to pieces. One Changeling moved in closer, striking the Princess of the Sun in the chestplate, only to be stopped cold as the magical armor gave off a brilliant sheen, releasing a magical pulse which obliterated the creature.

Luna fired bolts of magic into the fray that arced from Changeling to Changeling, shattering them. The Royal Canterlot Voice magnified her battle cries, causing many of her potential attackers to flee from her wrath. Any Changeling that dared to come close enough to attack was swept away by her magic.

To Luna’s right, there was a flash of green from Chrysalis, turning a group of Changeling statues into dust. She was struggling to muster up enough energy to fight, but managed to hold the Changelings at bay. Her horn unleashed another blast of green and several Changelings disintegrated, only to be replaced by more.

“No matter what we do, there are always more!” Chrysalis shouted to the two Sisters above to the roaring din of battle. She fired another bolt of magic, causing two more Changelings to fall to the ground as splintered stone.

For a moment there was a lull as the petrified Changelings regrouped to attack.

“Come on, ladies!” Discord said. “You can do better than that!” His body glowed white then morphed into its natural draconequus shape. “Here, let me help.” His fingers snapped and the Changelings doubled in size, growing long barbs along their bodies as their fangs enlargened.

“Whoops,” he laughed. “I guess that didn’t help at all. Oh well.” He shrugged and lounged back on the throne, summoning a cushy footrest for his feet.

With renewed vigor, the Changelings charged again. Just as the size of their bodies had doubled, so had their ferocity also doubled. The Royal Sisters summoned powerful shields of energy, burning and repulsing all the Changelings that touched it. Chrysalis, however, was not so lucky. Already weakened, the onslaught quickly overwhelmed her and she fell beneath a pile of her petrified subjects which attacked her relentlessly.

As the assault continued, the shields protecting the Sisters began to wane. Celestia looked at Luna in desperation. There wasn’t anything they could do.

Suddenly, a loud voice echoed from outside the Hive.

“DISCORD!”

A huge explosion sounded outside, shaking the entire Hive.

Discord paused and turned his head slightly to one side, sensing something. He gave a hearty laugh and smiled. “Ah ha! This is interesting!” he said. “I’m afraid I must bid you ladies adieu for the moment, wait right here.” He disappeared in a bright flash. The Changelings froze, becoming immobile statues once more.

The two sisters dropped their shields, turned to the pile of statues burying Queen Chrysalis, and quickly levitated the stone creatures away. She moved weakly and looked up at Celestia and Luna.

“We are going to escape now, right?” she said in a hoarse voice as she tried to stand up.

In answer, Luna’s shimmering magic enveloped the three and they vanished from the throne room.

***

Celestia, Luna, and Chrysalis rested under a shield of protective magic in the middle of a small clearing. The woods were pitch black, and would remain so until the sun, under Discord’s control, made its unscheduled appearance.

Once they had escaped, they immediately began setting up defensive measures to hide themselves from Discord’s, and others’, magic and sight. The large, swirling shield around them was the result.

Chrysalis lay sleeping on the ground. Being starved of food for so long followed by a grueling battle had left her exhausted, despite the two Sisters’ love she fed on. Celestia and Luna circled about opposite ends of the shield, their eyes closed and their horns glowing, casting spell after spell. While the shield was already strong enough to evade Discord’s probing search for them, they weren’t taking any chances.

Finally, tired and bruised, they sat themselves in the middle of the clearing next to Chrysalis. Celestia’s horn flashed and a small fire ignited between the three of them, giving them warmth and light. Thankfully, the shield hid this sight from outside eyes. In the corner of the clearing, the Sisters’ unworn armor gleamed on the ground. Finished with their work, the two Sisters had time to think.

“What dost thou think, sister?” Luna said calmy, the fluctuating light of the fire illuminating her face.

“About what, Luna?” Celestia asked. “About where we go from here? About what I think happened back there? About what to do with Chrysalis?”

“Yes,” Luna said.

“Well,” Celestia replied, “we still need to continue our quest. What happened at the Hives changes nothing.” She looked down at the snoring Chrysalis and smiled. “But at least now, thanks to her, we have an idea of where we are going. When she wakes, we need to find out what she knows about the Time Turner.”

She returned her gaze to Luna. “And as for the Hives… I’m not sure. I don’t know what drew Discord’s attention, but at least it allowed us to escape.”

“And for that we can all give thanks,” Luna said.

Silence fell between the two as they returned to their thoughts. What would they do when found the Time Turner? Would it still work after all these years, and if so how could they use it? They both knew one thing for sure, however, and that was that they had to retrieve to artifact first.

“Tell me Luna,” Celestia said idly, breaking the silence, “what is she dreaming of?” She motioned a hoof towards Queen Chrysalis.

Luna’s eyes glowed softly and her body tensed as she began exploring the dreams of the sleeping Changeling. After a few minutes, her eyes dimmed as she returned to her body. She was frowning.

“She dreams of a darkness she cannot escape. A darkness that she fears.” Luna said, looking mournfully at the sleeping Chrysalis.

This grabbed Celestia’s attention. “What is this darkness?”

Luna’s eyes glowed once more. Several seconds later they returned to normal

. “Well?” Celestia said, urging Luna to answer. “What is it?”

“Hunger,” Luna said simply. “Feeding her subjects. She fears that her failure at the wedding hath led them to their fate.”

It was now Celestia’s turn to look troubled. She cast a sad glance towards the resting Queen.

“Perhaps,” Celestia said in a soft voice, “perhaps we misunder-”

“What was that?” Luna whispered suddenly, standing up. She was fully alert, ears straining to pick up any sounds from outside the magical barrier.

“What is what?” Celestia asked, nervous. She now stood up too, looking about nervously. A crack suddenly sounded in the woods.

“There it was again. Dost thou hear it, sister?” Luna said quietly. She motioned for Celestia to keep her voice down. She approached the swirling wall in the direction the sound had come from. Celestia followed behind her.

“Luna,” she said skeptically, “we are in the middle of a forest. There are bound to be noises late at night. Furthermore, we are inside a magical stealth shield that muffles all our sounds. It is unlikely that something outside will-”

Luna jammed her hoof over Celestia’s mouth, cutting her off. Before Celestia could reply, Luna pointed towards a dark patch in the woods beyond the field. It meshed with the darkness, and Celestia was startled by its size when it stood up and moved stealthily through the woods. The dark figure was massive, nearing the heights of the trees themselves. It was eerie how silently it could traverse the woodland.

The world flashed around them, and Celestia prepared for an attack before she realized it was only the sun rising to midday. She would never get used to Discord’s chaotic cycle. And neither, apparently, would the beast before them. It roared and covered its eyes from the sudden light.

Celestia gasped as she recognized the beast. It was red-skinned, and stood on two hooved legs, matted with dark fur. Its upper body was bare, revealing rippling muscles as it raised its arms to block the light. Large horns adorned its head and a heavy black fur matted its neck, trailing down its back. A demon of Tartarus.

The day ended, the sun quickly descending below the horizon, and the woods became dark once more. The figure of the demon blended once more into the shadows and it trudged away from the group into the vast expanses of the woods, unaware that its movement was being watched. Celestia released the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. This made things much more difficult. If there was a demon released from Tartarus, what else could be wandering the lands of Equestria?

“What is a demon doing outside of Tartarus?” Luna exclaimed, no longer worried about being overheard. “Did I miss something in my thousand year imprisonment?”

“This shouldn’t be possible.” Celestia said, trying to come to terms with what she had seen. “The demons were sealed away in Tartarus, along with some of Equestria’s most dangerous beings thousands of years ago.” They turned away from the edge of the shield and walked towards the fire. “The only thing that makes sense is if Tartarus was opened. But how? And why?”

The two sisters heard a coughing fit and turned their attention to Chrysalis, stirring by the fire. Seeing the approach of the two Sisters she stood to greet them. Though shaking, she was now able to stand.

“Isn’t it obvious?” she croaked. “This is Discord’s doing. Just like everything else!” she finished angrily. She coughed again and sat down, the effort of standing being enough to tire her.

The Sisters returned to their seats by the fire. The sun rose again, bathing the clearing in daylight. On the horizon, the clouds of pink loomed ever closer, threating to block out the chaotic sun.

Chrysalis cleared her throat. “So I suppose this is where you ask me where the Time Turner is.”

“Yes, I suppose it is,” Celestia answered.

“Indeed,” Luna said, “thou mentioned thou knew where to find the Time Turner.”

The sun sank below the trees again, the trio only illuminated by the flickering light of the fire. The two Sisters focused intensely on the queen of the Changelings.

Chrysalis took a deep breath. “The story goes back over a thousand years ago, or so my mother once told me.” She stared deeply into the fire. “My great great grandmother, the once mighty leader of the ancient Changeling kingdom, had aspirations to expand her empire. To the north, the chaotic Discord ruled, and to the west the buffalos were too strong.

“So she turned her eyes east, to beyond the seas. There, she found the Griffon Kingdom. While normally the Kingdom consisted of squabbling tribes that fought each other for land, the griffin tribes united to fight the invading Changeling armies, and my ancestor was forced back across the ocean. But the retreat did not end there. The griffons followed, united by their common lust for vengeance and soon the Hives were under siege, the Changeling kingdom all but broken.

“It was then that my great great grandmother was met by a mysterious individual. He gave her what he called the Time Turner, and told her that it had amazing abilities. With it, she was able to stop the siege, and defeat the griffon armies at every battle. But she did not fully understand the power she had been given, and soon the griffons were once again laying siege to the Hives.

“In a final attempt to save her kingdom, she made a truce with the griffons. In it, she gave up the Time Turner to the griffons and in return, the griffons returned to their lands, taking it with them. Soon afterwards, Discord’s rule was overthrown by the two of you, and my great great grandmother turned her sights on Equestria.” Chrysalis exhaled. “That is all I know. My mother told this story to me when I was small, and when you came to the Hives, speaking of this object, it made me remember this story.”

The Sisters stayed silent, digesting the information.

“So,” Luna said, “we need to go to the Griffon Kingdoms.” She smiled. “I believe we have caught what is called a ‘lucky break’!”

The sun rose again, light filled the clearing.

“We’ll rest here while we can,” Celestia said. “Soon, we will leave for the Griffon Kingdoms and undo a hundred years of evil.” She smiled.

***

“I still don’t understand why we can’t fly,” Chrysalis said as the group marched towards Equestria’s western coast. They were currently walking through a valley between two large mountains, and were swiftly nearing the ocean.

The Sisters wore saddlebags on their sides, carrying their armor. They had debated leaving their amron in the woods before they left but had ultimately decided against it; the sighting of the demon earlier had played no small part in that decision.

“It’s too dangerous to fly while Discord runs rampant. And now that the denizens of Tartarus roam free, we can never be too cautious. There ancient evils sealed there which would give even us a run for our bits.” Celestia answered.

“Ugh,” Chrysalis moaned. “Then why can’t we teleport? I am too dignified to walk!”

They had been walking for hours. So far, they had seen nothing like the demon in the woods, but they had been diligently watchful.

“We’ve never been across the sea,” Celestia said. “We’ve always met with griffon ambassadors, and despite being allies we’ve never needed to visit. So unless you’ve been there none of us can teleport there.”

Chrysalis just groaned as they continued to walk. She carried nothing, but she was still suffering from near starvation and exhaustion from battle.

They continued for another hour, the valley beginning to slope upwards, the mountains leveling.

“We are nearing the ocean,” Celestia said. “From there we will have to fly. It won’t be as dangerous as flying over land, but we might still be spotted. Prepare for the-”

She was interrupted by a loud screech from above. Looking up into the sky, she saw two white figures flying, closely tailed by three dark figures.

“Luna,” Celestia said, “look there, in the sky!”

“Those look like… griffons!” Luna exclaimed, squinting in the sunlight. “But, what’s following them?”

One of the dark figures darted towards the traling griffons. Another loud screech filled the air and the white figure of the griffon plummeted.

Celestia quickly removed her saddlebags and shot upwards, flying towards the falling griffon. Glancing back, she saw Luna following just behind her while a very exasperated Queen Chrysalis stood on the ground watching. She returned her attention to the figures ahead of them and motioned Luna towards the falling griffon.

With a mighty flap of her wings, Celestia powered forward. As she neared the aerial skirmish, she saw three large, winged snakes chasing the remaining griffon. She zeroed in on the group and flew in behind the group of winged snakes. Her horn glowed brightly and she fired a golden beam, striking one of the snakes. It hissed and plummeted, smoke trailing from its burnt side.

Looking below her, Celestia saw Luna catch the injured griffon. She looked back up to see that other two flying snakes had disappeared. She heard a whizzing noise to her left and swerved, narrowly avoiding a rocketing attack from one of the flying snakes she now recognized as Couatl, beasts from Tartarus. They were roaming the skies, searching for prey they had been denied for thousands of years.

Glancing behind her, she saw the other Couatl. She spread her wings against the wind, quickly slowing her speed and flew behind the trailing serpent. Her horn lit up again, charring the Couatl dropped from the sky like a stone, joining its brother.

She looked around for the last Couatl. Seeing nothing, she looked back down to Luna just in time to see the white fangs of the third serpent flying up towards her at a terrifying speed. Surprised, she tried to move out of the way, but she realized it was too late.

At the last moment, an arc of lightning struck the belly of the snake, making it fall towards the earth. Luna flew up Celestia’s side and nuzzled her sister. Celestia smiled back, and turned her attention to the fleeing griffon.

With a few flaps of her wings, she moved up to the griffon’s side. The griffon looked at his new saviors with surprise.

“Go down!” Celestia yelled over the sound of the wind.

Following Celestia’s, he began his descent. Looking below, Celestia saw that Luna had planted the other griffon on the ground next to Chrysalis.

As they came in for a landing, Celestia saw that the other griffon was female. She hit the ground softly and ran towards the griffon. Nearing her, Celestia saw that she was unconscious. Searching for wounds, she rolled the griffon over and saw a distinct bite mark covering her entire shoulder.

Her horn flared brightly as she waved it over the bite marks. Gently, she pulled her horn back and a clear yellow liquid flowed from the wound. With a flash, she vaporized the liquid, and quickly healed the small bite wounds on the griffon.

The other griffon joined Celestia’s side and began checking over the fallen griffon. Looking between the griffons, Celestia noticed brightly colored blue bandanas the griffons were wearing. The female griffon coughed, drawing Celestia’s attention. The griffon suddenly opened her eyes and shouted in fear.

“Shhh, it’s ok now. You’re all right.” Celestia’s tranquil voice calmed the fearful griffon. “I’ve removed the serpent’s venom from your body; everything will be alright.”

She glanced at the other griffon. “What are you two doing here? The Griffon Kingdoms are across the sea. What business have you here in Equestria?”

Clearing his throat, the male griffon spoke. “My name is Frauke.” He motioned towards the griffon on the ground. “And this is my partner, Gisela.”

“Pleasure to meet you Frauke,” Celestia said, holding out a hoof. Frauke took it in his claw and shook it vigorously.

“Thank you for your help,” he said, “a few more seconds and we would have both been goners. Those things came out of nowhere! What exactly were those?”

“An ancient terror,” Luna said from behind Frauke, drawing his attention. “They once roamed these lands during the evil times thousands of years ago. Then, during the dawn of the Days of Enlightenment, they were sealed away in Tartarus, along with most other great evils. They were known as the Couatl. Flying venomous snakes; they killed indiscriminately.”

Frauke drew back alarmed. “Well then it is very fortunate you were able to stop them; they may have hurt several Equestrian ponies after dispatching us. Speaking of which, can you point us to the nearest Equestrian town?” He pulled a letter from a bag near his side. “We come to bring this letter to their Princesses, Luna and Celestia.”

“You have found them, master griffon,” Celestia said.

Frauke’s eyes went wide and, stiffening his posture, began bowing. “I am sorry, your Majesty. I did not know.” He continued to bow repeatedly.

“It’s alright,” Celestia said, “you may stand.” The griffon did as she said, but stood straighter than he had before. He motioned for Gisela to stand up next to him.

Looking at the two griffons, a question formed in Celestia’s mind.

She spoke to Gisela as she asked it. “Tell me, what do those bandanas on your head signify?”

Gisela looked confused. “Have you not heard, your Majesty? The griffon tribes are at war!”