“Oh, come now Picard.” The ever agitating voice of the ever present being known as ‘Q’ bemoaned to the captain of the starship Enterprise. “After all we’ve been through, and after all that you’ve seen in your time, you can’t tell me that you’re content to just sit here drifting through space without any sort of rhyme or reason.” Captain Picard placed a hand to his brow, massaging the bridge of his nose. Q’s antics were far irregular to the crew of the Enterprise, and the fact that this was so only served to make the situation more stressful to the Jean Luc.
“Q, I thought we finally had reached an understanding. How many deals must we strike before you leave us be?” Captain Picard demanded. Q offered a hurt expression. “Jean Luc, you don’t mean to tell me that for better or worse, you didn’t enjoy the strange and absurd you’ve seen thanks to me! Isn’t that what you and your crew seek out here in the vast cosmos? New life and civilizations! Adventure! Where’s that old spark you used to have, Capitan?”
Picard looked around his quarters, as if there were others around noting the deranged notions that Q had offered. The Captain leaned forward onto his desk, and crossed his hands. “Absurd.” Picard stated quietly. “Absurd is right, Q. How many utterly insane situations have we had to fight our way out of… how many improbable disasters have you personally caused only to find some manner of amusement in our struggle?”
“Jean Luc, I’m hurt!” Q exclaimed dramatically. “You act as though I have no sympathy for you or yours!” Picard smiled, reclined back into his chair, before replying. “Sympathy? Q, your twisted vision of curiosity and amusement has resulted in more stressful quarrels and life or death conflicts than I care to remember.” Picard scoffed, laughing briefly in irked amusement. “No, Q. If it’s all the same to you, I think we’ve all had more than enough of your discord.”
“Discord?” Q repeated curiously, before ending in feigned offense. “Very well then, Picard. I know when I’ve overstayed my welcome!”
“No, I don’t think you do.” Picard retorted, shaking his head.
Q tilted his head, and grinned. “Very well.” Q answered with a sudden overtone of defiance. “In that case, I say… GOOD DAY!” Q ended the conversation with a sudden snap of his fingers.
Picard felt an overwhelming rush as the ship’s walls vanished around him, the desk and his private quarters disappearing as the environment around him changed from vast and empty space, to a lush forested world. A dirt road ran through the landscape, and just over an incline, Picard could make out the outline of a village and it’s houses. “Q!” Picard barked into the cool morning air. “Q, send me back to the Enterprise this instant!” However, as usual, Q offered no response. Another ridiculous trial of Q’s was coming, and Picard knew that it was likely going to be more bizarre than the last.
Picard searched for his phaser, but found no such weapon on his person. The last thing he wanted, but found himself a part of all too often, was one of Q’s insane adventures while unarmed. The environment seemed peaceful enough, but all the same, the Captain maintained a vigilant watch of his surroundings. He continued to follow the road towards the village ahead in the hopes that perhaps one of the inhabitants might let him know where he was, or even when. Knowing the unknowable mind of Q, anything was certainly possible.
Coming from the top of the hill, following the dirt path, he noticed that the town was bustling with life. There were shops, houses, vendors, and all manner of business going on. Curiously, he could see no humans, certainly no humanoid life at least. What he noticed was that there were an abundance of equine creatures moving about the streets. Picard let out a sigh of surrender, and continued down the road. The village was astonishingly human in it's appearance. Many of the homes and shops seemed to be of human design, yet specifically created for this society of equines.
As the Captain reached the edge of town, he noticed that many of the equines had either shied away from him, or had fled all together. For his own sake, he hoped that this was not a sign of hostility or fear. “Damn it, Q.” He muttered under his breath. The horse like inhabitants of these streets were curious to Picard. They appeared familiar physiologically, at least externally, however they also featured unique differences. Notably, that the eyes were larger and more expressive, and the legs were thicker and more muscular. Along with this, the color of the hides and hair also varied radically from each other, and decorative markings seemed to sit on the flanks of most. Picard could also swear that he heard voices. Had Q deposited him into some world where equine life had evolved to the same degree than mankind had evolved from apes on Earth?
“Excuse me!” A feminine voice called out from far ahead on the road. The Captain squinted his eyes looking down the street, as a purple equine came trotting hurriedly towards him. The voice was not threatening, but Picard was sure to be prepared. When the creature stopped in front of him, he noted how vastly more expressive the facial features were. They were vaguely human, and strangest of all, a horn protruded from the equine’s forehead. “A… unicorn?” Picard let out involuntarily with an air of disbelief. “You’re… a unicorn?”
‘
“I am!” She replied. “But who… and what are you? I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a pony like you before.” Picard’s eyes remained as wide as they had when he laid eyes upon the village of horses. “I…” He started, unable to find the exact words he sought, before resorting to a usual introduction. “My name is Captain Jean Luc Picard of the Federation Starship Enterprise. Who may I ask are you? And where am I, exactly?”
The purple unicorn smiled and replied politely. “Pleased to meet you, my name is Twilight Sparkle. You’re in Ponyville, a city here in Equestria.”