//------------------------------// // Solo // Story: Grand Illusions // by tli //------------------------------// Chapter 1: Solo, or The Dusty Diplomat A powder blue unicorn squinted into the dusty sunset before her and sighed into the purple bandana she’d wrapped around her muzzle. "The charm of this place is wearing pretty bucking thin." She muttered, surveying the desolate landscape. A game of I Spy would get very old very quickly in a place like this. There was D for Dust and Dirt and Damnable-endless-sameyness, and that was about it. The Badlands weren’t known for their scenery, but that wasn’t why she'd decided to visit them. She’d come for knowledge, and she had a feeling that her patience and perseverance would be rewarded. That was the sort of thing that happened to ponies who embarked on epic quests for knowledge, wasn’t it? That, or they died. And I certainly won’t be doing any dying. "What sort of idiot couldn’t survive a little desert?" She asked the dusty air. "Stay hydrated." She began, lightly kicking her barrel of water. "Stay rested." She continued, leaning back and stretching as luxuriously as she dared over the bare wood of her spartan little wagon. "And don’t travel alone." She concluded, smirking at the timber wolf she’d bamboozled into pulling the wagon. The wolf seemed to realize he’d been mentioned and looked back at his Great and Powerful captor, growling and snapping his teeth. "Hush." Trixie waved him off. She was fully prepared to urge her borrowed beast of burden onward, but she considered the setting sun and thought better of it. Don't want to be caught in the dark. She pulled the wagon to a stop and started to set up camp for the night, staking the wolf to the ground with a lock she could operate from a distance and creating a transparent bubble around the top of the wagon to keep the heat in. Now for the tricky part. The infamous performer closed her eyes and stretched her mind to the desert around her - she imagined something close to a hundred foot radius - and willed it to be hers. She opened her eyes and found that the light of the dying day was warped at the horizon - the perimeter was up. Still, one couldn't be too careful. She hopped off the wagon and trotted out to touch it. As soon as her hoof passed through the shimmering veil, she felt a prickling on her scalp that would be impossible to ignore. Success. "Was there ever any doubt?" She asked herself smugly, returning to the wagon. Finally, just as she was ready to retire for the night, she tended to the wolf, pouring him a dish of maple syrup and levitating it into his reach. He sloppily devoured it, just as he'd done last time. Trixie woke with a start to the sensation of her perimeter spell going off. "No no no no no!" She hissed, leaping to her hooves and turning a circle in a low crouch, preparing to unleash some intimidating magic on whatever creature had been foolish enough to approach her. Her eyes darted back and forth. The sun was nearly all the way up. It was just the wagon, the draft wolves, and miles of dusty, cracked earth in every direction. Nothing. That only left one option. She jumped off the wagon and sent a barrage of fireworks underneath it, confident that she had roasted whatever lay beneath before she even hit the ground. She summoned a powerful wind to clear the smoke, grinning fiercely and preparing to gloat over the singed carcass of some nasty desert predator, but when the smoke disappeared, so had the intruder. Trixie frowned and jumped back onto the wagon. Best to have the high ground while she formulated a plan. She scanned the desert for movement, her eyes slipping past the two timber wolves curiously sniffing one another-. "Wait." She said flatly. "Two?" She suddenly had two timber wolves, though only one was wearing a harness. "Well, I think I was making that a little harder than it had to be." She muttered. Still, she smiled. Timber wolves were native to forested areas, or places that actually had timber - not the desert. That could only mean one thing. "I've got a change-ling." She sang under her breath. She prepared to cast the spell to break a changeling disguise - one that every competent unicorn had learned practically overnight after the invasion - but paused. That wouldn't be very diplomatic, would it? She decided to try a different approach. "You there." She pointed to the new timber wolf. "I know you're a changeling. I just want to talk to you. You can drop the disguise." Trixie's speech distracted the fake from his introduction. He stopped mid-lick, confusing the real timber wolf who had been interested in the newcomer and the possibility of escape. The fake backed away from the harnessed wolf, stepping out of his reach before going up in a burst of green flame. The real timber wolf was understandably disturbed by this, yelping and whining at what appeared to be an unprecedented spontaneous combustion. The wolf quickly changed his tune when he saw a changeling calmly standing where his new friend had been, and he snarled in disapproval. Trixie, meanwhile, grinned appreciatively at the transformation. She removed her bandana and pointed imperiously to herself. "Now do me." She watched as the changeling's black skin burned away to reveal her own blue coat. "Not bad!" Trixie stepped off the wagon and approached what she had to admit was perfect mirror image, applauding the illusion. "You’ve got skills, and I respect that. But you were born with those skills, and I consider that cheating." Trixie stared the changeling down like a disapproving schoolmarm, but soon cracked a smile. "I also respect cheating." She whispered conspiratorially. "I think we'll get along fine" She smiled greasily. "I came to propose a trade. Your skills for mine?" "Ssskilllls." The changeling hissed in a poor imitation of the showmare’s famous voice. "Yes, that’s what I said. You have skills, I have skills, let’s trade." She summarized with a salespony's smile, pumping a hoof in the spirit of camaraderie. "Skills." The changeling repeated. The hiss was absent this time. It seemed he (or possibly she?) had gotten a better feel for Trixie’s voice. "Trade." It said. "Yes. Trade." Trixie repeated, blinking slowly. Her smile began to fade. "Traaaade." The changeling repeated once again, squinting and rolling the word around with its tongue to really get a taste for it. Wonderful. I guess it thinks it has the upper hoof somehow - playing hard to get. Well, these foals have no idea what the Great and Powerful Trixie is capable of when the very art of illusion is at stake! "I see." Trixie said slowly. It was time to negotiate. "Well, perhaps my skill set isn’t exactly in demand way out here in the wastes... but isn't there anything else you’re interested in?" She tossed her mane and let the question hang in a way she imagined was quite seductive. She didn’t know if seduction was really necessary for a race that fed on love, but she was willing to put in the effort if it was required. The changeling appeared to nod in understanding. Trixie smiled triumphantly. It’s not as though a passionate interlude with myself is a distasteful prospect, after all. She was about to ask the doppleganger if he wanted the cape on or off when her copy cocked its head to the side. "Traaade?" It asked uncertainly. The real Trixie’s face fell. "You have no idea what you’re saying, do you? You’re just flapping my mouth, aren’t you?" She deadpanned. "Trade!" The changeling nodded enthusiastically. "Fine." Trixie huffed. "Take me to your leader." She demanded. "Or elementary teacher. Whoever keeps you from eating paste." She finished under her breath. The enchanting fake blinked owlishly. "Lead on, you sexy beast!" Trixie commanded impatiently, shooing the dimwitted copycat away. The changeling started walking and Trixie followed. Eventually the two arrived at a hole in the ground. The changeling pointed downward, gesturing for Trixie to go inside. "After you." Trixie insisted. She wasn’t about to turn her back on him. Her likeness was consumed in a burst of green fire, only getting halfway through an eye-roll before the line of encroaching flame reached its face and turned its eyes solid green. The naked changeling began to lead her down the dark tunnel. "You know, I’m tired of not having anything to call you. And I can’t call you Sexy anymore since you aren’t now, so what’s it going to be? Any preference?" She asked. The changeling gave no response other than a sidelong glance. "If you don’t speak up, you might not like what I pick." Trixie sing-songed. The changeling had been listening to Trixie speak, and one could almost imagine that he was making an effort to understand her. Trixie had nothing better to do, so she kept trying. "What is your naaaaame?" She drew out the last word, hoping it was one he’d heard before. "Name?" The changeling repeated, gesturing at his own chest with a heavily perforated hoof. "Yes! Sweet Celestia, progress! What’s your name?" She demanded. "Burt." The changeling answered proudly. "Burt." Trixie repeated. "Burrrrt." Burt nodded, excited that the strange pony was able to pronounce something that must have sounded so foreign to her. "Burt, do you ever get the feeling you might have been adopted?" Trixie asked with total seriousness and not even a hint of tact. Burt just shrugged and smiled toothily, never breaking his stride. Eventually, Burt led Trixie to an opening where the tunnel appeared to branch. Several changelings were engaged in an idle conversation of hisses, clicks, and the occasional wet raspberry. It seemed that this junction was the changeling equivalent of the office water cooler. The group reacted with surprise to Trixie, cautiously gathering around Burt and the curiosity he'd brought into their midst. "I am the Great and Powerful Trixie, and I am here to learn your illusions!" Trixie decreed. "Great and Powerful Trixie!" Three copies of herself suddenly shouted. "Illuuuuusions." Another doppleganger repeated. "Illushin." The one next to him attempted. "Illuuujon. Jon." One of the mob of Trixies corrected. "How do you impersonate somepony long enough to steal love if you can't even talk to them?" Trixie wondered aloud. "I'd really love to find a changeling who speaks Equestrian." At this, one of the Trixies ran off as if he'd understood her and knew exactly where to find such a bilingual changeling. A few minutes later, Trixie and the changelings were warming up to each other, though in the changelings' case that was probably mostly due to the language barrier. "Forget magic, I’ll just bring a big bunch of you bugs back with me! The crowd will love it! Love is what you’re into, right?" She asked the changeling mob. They ignored the question and continued cavorting in her skin. "The Great and Powerful Trixie, now with twelve hundred percent more Trixie!" She boomed, gesturing grandly as if she could already see the amazing new show she'd create. "Although I'll have to figure out how to fit everypony on the wagon. I might have to start stacking you like firewood." She mused aloud. "Wait, what am I saying? I'll buy more harnesses and you can all help pull!" The showmare declared magnanimously. Things were looking good. The changelings cycled through various minor changes to her anatomy and appearance, their bodies constantly in flux. They rendered her as a pegasus, an earth pony, a very small alicorn, and even as some kind of lizard-pony with a coat of iridescent scales. There were so many versions of herself milling around that she was having trouble watching all the action. "I could do some real death-defying stunts with all these backup copies..." She rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "I could put one of you through a woodchipper - LIVE, ONSTAGE - every week and still have enough of you to last me until spring!" The idea was so exciting that she did a little jig on the spot. "If that's the sort of thing you're likely to do, then you're leaving empty-hoofed." A voice with an odd buzzing quality came from behind her. Trixie turned and found herself face-to-face with an undisguised changeling who looked exactly like the others, apart from what Trixie assumed to be a look of cautious amusement. "Are you the king of the changelings?" Trixie asked in a way that suggested she wouldn't be that impressed with a positive answer. "King? Ha, no. We have a queen. Rather, we had one..." He trailed off with a frown. "Well, are you in charge?" Trixie demanded impatiently. "No, no changeling here is in charge. We have no leader right now. Not since the failed coup in Canterlot." He spat. "Sore loser?" Trixie asked. "No, just wish the queen had tried something a little less balls-out insane. She made the mess and now we're all lying in it." He smiled wryly and offered Trixie a piano black hoof. "You can call me Dazzle. That's the name I go by when I haven't borrowed somepony else's." Trixie accepted the hoofshake. "I hear you came to trade? I'm afraid we're not likely to have anything you want down here." Dazzle said apologetically. "I beg to differ. I'm here to learn the secrets of changeling illusion magic." Trixie replied with no small amount of self-importance. Dazzle's eyes grew wide with mirth, though he nodded his head in polite acknowledgement of her plan. "That's a new one." "I would imagine so." Trixie smiled smugly. "I'm willing to trade tutelage in MY Great and Powerful illusions for lessons in your changeling magic." "Huh." Dazzle continued nodding slowly until his head came to a halt. "Why?" He inquired, squinting at Trixie with distrust. "Because, if I want to put on the Greatest show in Equestria, then I have to pull out all the stops, don't I?" She asked rhetorically. "As soon as I saw what your kind could do, I knew I had to learn your tricks. The act I could put together with that kind of magic..." She paused, seemingly overcome by emotion. "...would be the most amazing thing ever witnessed by pony eyes!" She heralded, fireworks exploding around her as she reached in triupmh for what would normally be the heavens, but was currently the roof of a dank cavern. Dazzle and his brethren simply blinked at the display. "Force of habit." Trixie panted, coming down from her excitement. One of the fake Trixies cautiously poked at a piece of glowing shrapnel from the pyrotechnic display, wrinkling its nose at the smell of the explosive. "Where were you even keeping that?" Dazzle wondered aloud. "Inside the hat. I keep enough firepower in here to blow up a bridge." Trixie bragged, prodding the hat with a hoof. "Why?" Dazzle coughed as a tendril of smoke from the fireworks found its way to his muzzle. "Sometimes a pony just has to blow up a bridge." Trixie croaked as the smoke began to reach her as well. "Does that happen often?" Dazzle asked with deep concern. "Not often." She said defensively, summoning a breeze to carry the smoke back the way they'd come. "Sometimes, though..." The showmare's eyes slipped out of focus. "Sometimes it's all you can do." Trixie's eyebrows knitted together as if she recalled such an occasion. "Those koi were probably fine. Fish love nitrates, right? I'm pretty sure they do." She muttered to herself. "Moral of that story: Never work a cuteciñera at a house with a koi pond." She concluded. "Wise words." Dazzle agreed, trying to hide his amusement. He privately wondered if it was really necessary to bring high explosives to a foal's coming-of-age ceremony, but kept his mouth shut. "Speaking of regrettable tactical errors, what exactly was your queen thinking, attempting a full-scale invasion of Canterlot?" Trixie inquired. "It's not as if frightening us all into submission would encourage anypony to love you." "That's true, although fear is an alternative source of food for us. Far less than ideal, but it'll keep us from starving. She didn't plan to rule through fear. She had some sort of long-term plan for replacing the Sun princess and soaking up the admiration of ponykind. I think she intended for the invasion to be erased from pony memory, but that clearly didn't pan out." He sighed at the loss of the thousands of changelings who'd been foolish enough to follow the queen, only to be scattered to the four winds when the plan failed. "So what's your game? You're some kind of magician?" "I am a master illusionist - the Greatest kind of magician." Trixie swelled with pride. "So you really came all this way to visit a bunch of evil changelings and learn some magic?" Dazzle demanded incredulously. "I've done crazier things in the name of putting on a show." Trixie bragged as she nonchalantly polished a hoof. "I bet you have." Dazzle chuckled. It made no sense at all, but he could tell that the strange magician was telling the truth. "And for the record, I don't think you're evil." She appeared as though she'd had a moment of extreme cleverness. "If you were, I imagine you would've jumped me the moment you had me surrounded, hm?" She theorized. Dazzle gave no response other than a slight droop in his posture. "I don't think you're evil." She repeated, the boastful edge fading from her voice. The other changelings had been reverting, one by one, to their natural forms and had gathered to observe the conversation between their ad-hoc leader and the pony who didn't fear them. As Trixie went on, they grew still and quiet. "I think you're hungry. Nothing grows here, so nothing lives here... except you. There's no sustenance here, and I bet going out isn't as appealing as it used to be, is it?" Dazzle shook his head. "That's what I thought. I know the difference between evil and hungry. I've been hungry before." Her tone was sincere and perhaps even a little regretful. Dazzle had a strong feeling that Trixie wasn't merely referring to the hunger of an empty belly. "So what are you doing for food these days?" "We're still trying to figure that out. We know things can't keep going the way they were." He concluded grimly. "Well, can't you just rely on subtlety like before? Go out and..." She struggled for words. "Find somepony who wants company?" She finished uncertainly. "I don't know." He shook his head hopelessly. "Every magic user I meet will be able to strip my disguise away. Why take an unnecessary risk on a new acquaintance nopony seems to know? Going out among ponies isn't much of an option now, unless you want to provide the introduction." He looked to Trixie, who looked as though she was actually considering it. "I suppose I could do the 'dog in a nursing home' bit again." Dazzle heaved a sigh. "It's usually an easy gig, but the smell... I HATE old pony smell." He cringed. "You pretend to be a dog?" Trixie guffawed. "An adorable dog." Dazzle corrected. "If you met me as a dog, you'd pet me. I guarantee it." He pointed a black hoof accusingly at the dubious showmare for emphasis. Trixie shrugged in surrender, conceding that the changeling would probably make an excellent dog. "I could help you find some food, if that's what you want. We could walk to Dodge City and hit the saloon. I'll be your wingmare." Trixie teased. Dazzle smiled wryly. "Dodge City is on high alert since the news came out that we live so close. I appreciate the offer, though." "Well, what about the offer I made to your friends, here?" Trixie gestured to their silent audience. "They're my brothers, and I believe you offered to end our suffering with a wood chipper..?" Dazzle trailed off uncertainly. "No!" Trixie waved the idea off as if it had been somepony else's. "That was a joke. I mean you could come on the road with me - become part of my act. I can only imagine the sort of illusions we could pull off together - the Great and Powerful Trixie and the secret changeling!" She whispered dramatically. "That's got a nice ring to it, even if we can't put it on a poster." "Hmm." Dazzle poked at the ground and took a long look at his brothers. "It's not as though it would be my first performance gig - I've been in bands before. A warmed-up crowd is a nice meal." He smiled at the memory of his last time on stage. "You were in a band?" Trixie was delighted by the idea that Dazzle had commanded an audience and made a living on their admiration. "What did you play?" "I didn't play. I sang. We usually end up singing since - as far as pony ears are concerned - a changeling has infinite range." A small measure of pride had slipped into Dazzle's voice. "That must be handy. I imagine you can match any style that way. No band could resist you." She was impressed. "Well, a couple did, but they were definitely the exception." The changeling allowed. "So the crowd really loves you?" "They can't get enough of me." Trixie stomped a hoof for emphasis. "Is Appleoosa far enough for you? We could make it a full tour if you're up for it." Trixie was ready to leave as soon as possible. Dazzle considered the offer in silence. To Trixie, it felt like a very long while. She could swear he was staring her down as if looking for something - perhaps some kind of weakness or a sign that she couldn't be trusted - but she couldn't be certain with those strange eyes of his. Finally, he spoke. "I suppose hitting the road and joining a magic act is as good a plan as any." He smirked. Before Trixie could congratulate him on his wise move, he spoke again, this time more seriously. "I just need to be sure of something before I commit to this." He took a deep breath and released it slowly, deciding how best to approach the issue. "It's a long way to Appleoosa. It's just going to be you, me, and the road for quite a while. And normally I wouldn't be worried, since friendship is a nice, steady meal when you can get it - much less intense than love, but it'll certainly keep us going -" Dazzle was starting to ramble. "But?" Trixie prompted. "Well, the thing is... I haven't gotten a whiff of affection from you since you got here." He said delicately. Trixie's face quickly shifted to indignation, but Dazzle was ready for it, holding up a hoof to forestall her protest. "And I know we've just met, but that's abnormal based on the ponies I've encountered in the past. I mean, no offense, but you're a bit abnormal. You crossed the Badlands by yourself to make a social call on an enemy of the state." Trixie took a short break from looking miffed to raise her chin smugly. "If we're going to be on the road together, I just need to know it'll be worth my while." Trixie was taken aback by the question. Dazzle's tone had been apologetic, yet he refused to break eye contact while he waited for her response. "I'm sorry." Trixie replied with genuine regret, and Dazzle found himself surprised at her sincerity. "I've been traveling solo for so long..." She shook her head slightly as if admonishing herself. "I just need a little time to warm up. It'll happen, I'm sure." The showmare's confidence was more tempered than usual as she tried to offer her new partner a reassuring smile. "Alright then." Dazzle returned her smile. It seemed he'd decided to trust her.