//------------------------------// // Epilogue // Story: The Blood Ravens Last Flight // by Nobodyslament //------------------------------//         I woke up with a headache. I knew what a hangover was, but had never experienced one myself. I did a few experiments, and finding the results disagreeable, deduced that hangovers suck. I vaguely knew where I was, and decided to expand on that information by rolling over. My head shrieked in pain. My experiments concluded, my final conclusion was that hangovers were extremely painful. I toughed out the pain and stood up, reaching a hand to my head. It collided with the pain of a gauntlet crashing into my face. I looked at my hand. It was still wearing it’s armor. I looked myself over to find I was still wearing full armor. I took a step forward, and found the pain almost unbearable. I thought of ways to cure the hangover, and finding very few ways of doing it, went to the easiest solution. I fell down and went into a healing coma.         I woke up again, this time in a much more agreeable shape. I was in such a good shape, that I instantly noticed the large number of ponies surrounding me. I creaked upwards, literally, my armour creaked. They were all looking at me as if I had just assaulted Celestia. I looked at all their perplexed expressions and worry, needless to say it made me curious. “Hello there, what did I miss?”         All the ponies jumped back, seemingly in pure fear. AppleJack stepped out of the crowd, looking a bit worse than the last time I saw her. “Marx, are yah really up?”         I slowly stood up, making most of the crowd back up. Only a few stood their ground. I recognized a few of them. Namely a certain hourglass marked stallion. He  nodded at me and turned around, exiting out the door. I looked at AppleJack. “What’s going on here? I’ve just been sleeping.”         AppleJack shuffled back and forth guiltily. “Well Marx, yah see.... How do ah put this. Well, uh, y’all been sleeping for a might longer than yah planned on.”         My mind was already fully awake, but that statement kicked it into overdrive. My house  was clean, which was odd, considering I never removed the empty barrel of alcohol. I looked for the other signs of intrusion. There was a few dishes on the table, all dirty, and the rear rooms lights were on. I spun around to face AppleJack. The calm on my face betrayed none of my confusion. “”I hate to ask my friend, but how long have I been in a coma?” AppleJack caught a second wind. “Well, ah reckon’ ‘bout six months. Though Scoots could tell yah the exact day. She’s been waitin’ on yah for a while now.” I bolted up to attention. “Scoots? As in Scootaloo? Where is she? I need to know where she is right now.” I almost sprinted to to the door. I stopped in my tracks as I turned to face AppleJack, a glimmer of worry went across her face. I ignored it. “Hurry my friend, I must see her. I have been very, no, I have been a heretical level of negligent. I must fix it.” She simply looked at me. I shot her a winning smile. “I bet she’s in school. I’ll gladly sacrifice some time to see if I can get her out early today.” Without another word I opened my door and went out my door like a rocket, and no force in Equestria could stop me.         I reached the school building in record time, even for me. The building itself was quiet, and I could hear the unmistakable droning of a teacher being ushered through an open window. I slowed my pace to a walk and went to the front door. I listened for a moment before I heard the cue I’d been awaiting. “Alright everypony, could you please do the first nine questions in the book.” I knocked on the door twice. After some time I heard a shuffling of feet come near the door. The pony who I assumed to be the teacher walked up and opened the door. She looked at me, then back inside the classroom. “Pardon me, I have to go outside really quickly.” She extracted herself from the room, then turned to me with a fearful expression. “Whatever you do leave the children alone.”         I raised an eyebrow at this. I almost went so far as to laugh. “Hurt? You thought I would hurt the children?” After saying that I actually did laugh, which did nothing to improve the teachers mood. “Sorry ma’am, but after all I’ve done, thats the funniest joke I’ve ever heard.”                  Now it was the teachers turn to raise an eyebrow. “All you’ve done? I wouldn’t mind some exposition on that.”         I was not in the mood for explaining myself, and she was rude to me. Even with all that justification I still feel like a bastard for what I did. “I don’t know, let’s ask somepony.” I opened the library door and saw the room filled with foals. I knew three of them. I hadn’t bargained on them knowing me.         I saw three flashes of movement, followed by the loudest noise in Equestria. “MR.MARX!!!!” I was swarmed instantly, the three fillies covering my head and breastplate. The voice of Scootaloo cut through the various noises made by her classmates. “You finally woke up? You’ve been asleep since I got my cutie mark, and now you’re back.” She stopped moving around my head and gave me an embrace “What made you sleep anyways? Was it that stuff that was burning through the floor at you house?”         I shuddered a bit, explaining anything to do with the Space Wolves would be a scarring experience for all parties involved. In any case, I was spared by the teacher recovering from her shock. “Wait, you three know this thing?”         I was also spared the thought of correcting her as to my species. Scootaloo apparently took extreme offense to me being called a thing. “Hey ms. substitute-lady. You’re new to Ponyville so here’s your warning, Mr.Marx isn’t a thing.” She turned around and nuzzled my leg. “He’s my daddy, and he just woke up, so be polite to him.”         The teacher looked stunned as I picked up Scoots and held her in my arms. I thought it wise to reveal my original reason for showing up. “Despite the distractions ma’am, I still  have something to do. Would you mind if I checked Scootaloo out for the day?” The mare shook her head. I smiled at her. “Thank you ma’am. I believe you can fly beside me Scoots.”         After I said that sentence I threw her in the air. She caught herself in the air and hovered by my shoulder. She bounced in the air beside me excitedly, following me outside the school building. She started flying backwards in front of me, meeting my eyes. “Where we going Mr.Marx? We haven’t been able to go to the clearing since you slept, Princess Luna said something about it being dangerous until you got there. Lunar guards have been there ever since.” I patted the fillies head and grinned. “I sincerely doubt that that stopped you.” Scootaloo looked about nervously for a second before responding. “Of course I didn’t let it stop me. The only thing there was a big bag though, and It had it’s own special guard beside it.” She then seemed to remember something and perched on my pauldron. “You never answered my question though, why’d you go to sleep for so long anyways?” And here we are back in the firm territory of awkward. I still had enough of my near-primarch levels of charisma to not turn into a stuttering mess though. “I was following a tradition child.” I grew quiet for a moment. “Long ago I had a friend. His name was Vurces. He was a champion, like me. Where I was calm, and collected. He was wild, outlandish, and nigh on unstoppable in a fight. We traveled together, waging a two man war for the Imperium. Before he died we had a tradition, if one of us got wounded, we would drink some of a special blend to calm our nerves. This was my catch up night. He did not make it past a team of deamons, and I had no time for rest. As soon as that danger past I got here, and was occupied until the evening of my sleep.” I was competent that was a good answer, and tilted my head to see if Scootaloo had any questions. She was asleep on my shoulder. I popped out a smile and kept heading towards the clearing. A large grunt reminded me of the weight on my shoulder. I shrugged around a bit until she woke herself up. “What’s up Dad, we get to the clearing yet?” I walked through the start of Sweet Apple Acres with a shake of my head, “Not quite young one, but I had the feeling you feel asleep.” I chuckled a bit before breaking the tree-line. I was a bit annoyed when three Lunar guards stepped in front of me, and even more annoyed when two tried to approach me unnoticed from behind. My first reaction was to move Scootaloo off my shoulder. Which I followed. Past that, I went with pleasant conversation. “Well hello there, I seem to be heading this way. Would you mind letting me through?” The pair stood tall. Almost managing to hide their fear at my visage. “No civilians allowed into the clearing until such a time as a ‘Crucius Marx’ deems to redeem his items.” Hoping this would be an easy resolution, I gave the easiest answer. “Yes, and thats me. Seems like your mission is accomplished.”                  The guards bought into none of it. The mare of the pair stepped forward. “You seriously expect us to believe that you are Crucius Marx. We weren’t told much about him, but I doubt you’re him.”         I turned to Scootaloo. “If you’ll do me a favor young one, could you run to the house and get my helmet? It has my name on it.” She saluted and flew off, presumably to head home. Or maybe she knew I was about to... how would she put it... oh, ‘bust some flanks’. I turned to face the pair of guard. “If you’ll please move aside. I would like to be done before she gets back.” The guards simply fortified their stances and pointed glares at me. I could here the ones behind me do the same. I sighed. “Don’t say I didn’t play nice.         I jumped backwards and grabbed the guards behind me. One let out a scream while the other simply stood his ground and relaxed his muscles in case I dropped him. I rolled them back into the brush so they would get tangled up. I turned to the next two and smiled. “You still sure you want to do this.”         Sadly, they never got to answer. “ENOUGH!” I turned to face the new voice. To my eternal surprise, Luna herself was looking into my eyes hovering in the air. “Why are you beating up my guards. The mare and stallion over there are only standing because they saw me when I arrived.”         The mare of the pair spoke up. “That’s princess Luna to you.”         I glared her down. She stood back up while trying to stare back. I simply turned back around, with a new passive aggressive streak opened up. I still knew how some civilians spoke. “Anyways big momma, how am I supposed to grab my bug out bag when your A’s are blockin’ the get-go route. I could cheese the fuckers, but you’d be mucho ticked at that.” Luna simply sat there confused. Meanwhile the stallion was holding the mare back from trying to beat me until I was slush at the bottom of my boots.         It took Luna a while to translate that, and she still looked at me like I had just spoke gibberish, but she responded. “Guards, leave me alone with Mr.Marx. I believe if you continue to be here he will continue to be... difficult.” The guards left with only angry glance for me to remember them by. Luna put a hoof to the crest of her snout, and took a deep breath before talking again. “I really don’t have time to deal with you being angry at my guards, please just, get your stuff and get ready to go to Canterlot. Me and my sister needed to talk to you.”         I looked at her. I gladly will princess, but first I have an errand I must run. I might have to show up a few days later.”         Luna looked at me. “Very well, we have waited a few months, we can buy you a few days in the royalty.” With that, she left, leaving me with the scent of night and a few thoughts in my head.         Unfortunately, a certain being decided I shouldn’t be alone in my thoughts. “Well hello, my little human. How’s your day going.”         I grumbled. “Discord, what could you possibly want?”         Another laugh grated my nerves and threatened my sanity. “Oh, then I guess I’ll inform you. You see, hydra’s are actually pretty nice creatures. The problem is normally the fact they’re highly territorial, and the ponies put their village a bit too close to its hibernation spot. The Hydra slowly destroyed building, and ponies that refused to leave. The wonderbolts were called in, and tried to fight the thing. Frankly I’m surprised only two died. I thought it would be like watching a guardsman popping zerglings of at range. I got an image of a patchwork monster holding a lasrifle. Anyways, just something to think about.”         With that I had my bag of unknown goodies I started to walk back to my house. As soon as I was at the farm gates I saw an orange dot on the horizon. It soon went up and started to dive bomb at me. I put down the bag and readied myself. When Scootaloo reached me, I was ready. I grabbed my helmet and threw it in the air. I grabbed Scoots next, and used her momentum to propel me back. The helmet slipped onto my head and fizzled into place. “Well young one, you certainly do know how to make an entrance, don’t you?”         Scoots simply ruffled her mane and smiled. “Well, Rainbow taught me some things while you were asleep, so I guess I picked up some stuff.”         I patted her on the head. “I need to think on some things young one. Want to go to Sugarcube Corner for some lunch?”         Scoots jumped up in joy. “Hay yeah! Last one there has to pay.”         Scootaloo jumped into the air and whizzed off in the direction of Sugarcube Corner. I used the time to slow my pace and think over some things. The hydra that killed her parents was a territorial creature who was threatened. It was attacked and moved without any reasoning on either sides part. It would be wrong for me to hunt down an animal because it defended what was it’s own. I used this to justify my new mindset. I would try to start a new ,ovement in Equestria. A true crisis aversion team.         I reached the restaurant where I had promised to meet Scoots. I walked in to the sight of Scootaloo gorging herself. I would have asked about it, but supernatural force of evil approached me. “Hiya, Marxie. Foods on the house today since you just woke up. Sorry to leave so soon, but I gotta run and warn Twilight about an impending alligator gnawing on her book. Bye!” With that I was left in an empty store, with Scootaloo.         “It was cool I guess. Twilight got some letter from the princess and said I could stay with you while you slept. Oh yeah, and I learned how to build a parachute, it should make flying a lot safer. I learned about it in one of your books.”         I smiled at that. Then remembered some word choice she had a while back. “By the way Scoots. If I wanna keep you around, do I need to formally adopt you? I don’t want any trouble later on because of it.”         Scootaloo’s eyes widened “You mean you actually wanna be my daddy? Celestia said that nopony needed to worry about paperwork unless you didn’t want me.”         I smiled and patted her on the head. “Of course I want to keep you. You saved my life.” We sat there for a while, simply basking in each others company.         We sat there for almost an hour, snacking and chatting. We had to leave once Pinkie got back. The threat of a party if I stayed was rather severe. I stopped by Carousel Boutique for a moment. When I mentioned that I needed an outfit to see the princess’s Rarity freaked out. After a few moments of calming her down I got some measurements done. I was surprised to see the suit done in time for me to go to Canterlot right now. I headed back home and changed into it.         “But dad, I wanna go too.” Scootaloo whined while I changed clothes.         I grinned and shook my head. “I’m walking there, and you’ll have to fly beside me all the way there. You cool with that?” Scootaloo nodded enthusiastically as I walked out of my room. I walked out of the door. “Alright Scoots, try to keep up.” With that I set off at a brisk jog, or a heavy sprint by Scoots’s effort. I chuckled and scooped her into my arms.         It took me about half a day to get to Canterlot, which means at about nine or ten o'clock at night. I walked up to the castle and knocked on the gates. I was greeted by two very familiar lunar guards ponies. They were not as happy to see me. “What are you doing here beast, had you not been appeased with your ill-gotten gains?”         The bag had been filled with weaponry, all of which was now locked in my house. I raised an eyebrow at the guard in question. It was the stallion who held back the mare, obviously a slow learner. I knocked down the gate. “I was appeased by the returning of property that would be highly dangerous to all of your species.” I got within an inch of his face. “But your princess of the Night summoned me here. I understand you are angry, and I understand you want to avenge your earlier antics to me, but I will not stand for you being mindlessly rude to e because of a petty grudge.”         I let that sink in a moment before walking on. I was mostly glad Scootaloo had been asleep through the whole ordeal. I walked into the throne room, and awaited my audience. It was not a long wait. Celestia appeared first, a smirk gracing her visage. “Do you make it a habit to insult every guard trying to do his job?”         I let back a smile of my own. “Of course not, I just find myself angry when they treat me like a creature of evil.” My smile never left, and Celestia sighed. It seems I had that effect on immortals.         A shadow shifted, allowing Luna to come into the room. “well Marx, you’ve made a historical moment. You are the first to ever receive an official apology from the lunar guards ponies. They must have really done something to tick you off. Before getting sidetracked though, it’s time for business.”         My smile grew. “Business you say? I would be honored to hear it.”         Luna’s expression softened as Scootaloo shifted on my shoulder, keeping herself warm. “As we were saying Marx. Immortal beings are rare in Equestria, and they tend to become rulers, or imprisoned.” She cast a meaningful glance at the statue garden. “Our proposition is simple. You became a co-ruler of Equestria, and rule over the peace. You will do as you please, and we will not judge, but you mustn't ever hurt or kill. Only rule.”         I smiled. “I will gladly agree if you accept my terms. Nobody will learn of my status, except those who I reveal it to. That, and I get to recruit some guards from your ranks to start a private crisis aversion force. Does that sound fair?”         Luna smiled, and looked to her sister. “Sister, I believe you were right. We have a new guardian, and he will most certainly keep everything in order.”