//------------------------------// // Phase 02 // Story: Shaded Bubbles // by Juggalomalice //------------------------------// This was awkward. Sombra found himself in a quaint little home on the outskirts of Ponyville sitting at a rather nice dining room table. It was a two story house and the whole place was decorated with pictures of muffins, flowers, and numerous photos of a little filly unicorn with a blonde mane and a pale purple coat. The whole house smelled like baked bread, too. Sombra slowly rubbed the temples of his head with his hooves as he thought to himself, “I hate the bouncy happy feel of this house, I hate this happy smell, I hate this happy feel, I hate this happy...” “Everything.” He growled out loud as glanced across the bright dining room. It's peaceful and loving atmosphere acting like a deadly toxin that was slowly making the king sick to his stomach. “Keep it together Sombra. This is for world domination.” He hissed to himself as he played with the muffin in front of him. It was one of many muffins that sat in a large bowl in the center of the table. His host, Derpy, had run into the nearby kitchen to make some tea so that they could have something to drink before they discussed the details of his move. “Yes, once I've moved in I'll slowly take over this household and from there my evil will reach out and engulf all of Ponyville. The first day of my world conquest starts today. BEWARE PONYVILLE! KING SOMBRA IS BACK!! BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” He ended up shouting at the end of his declaration as he stood up from his chair and struck a traditional evil villain pose and began laughing in tune with the ominous thunder that rang outside even though it was a clear and sunny day. It took Sombra almost one whole minute of evil laughing before he noticed the filly unicorn from the pictures standing by the doorway looking at him wide-eyed. Her expression didn't portray fear. More like intense confusion. “How long has she been standing there?” Sombra thought. “Did she hear my plans? If she did she could ruin everything. I'll have to remove her. I don't have a gem mine here so I guess I'll just have to resort to old fashion murder.” He had to act quickly and remove her from this world before Derpy became aware of her presence. A double homicide was a bad way to start a covert operation. “Freezing her in crystal and then shattering her would probably work.” he continued to plot, but before he could enact his genius scheme… “MOM! THERES A WERID GUY IN THE DINING ROOM!” The purple filly cried out. “Horse-apples!” Sombra cried out in his mind. “Dinky!” Derpy cried out in a scowling tone as she entered the dining room, a tea tray delicately balanced on her back. “What did I tell you about being rude to our guests?” “Wait until they're out of earshot?” Dinky replied absentmindedly. Silenced, Derpy blinked several times in mild shock. “No, the other thing.” She hissed slightly in emphasis. “OH!” Dinky cried as she remembered. “If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.” “That's better. Now come grab a muffin and say hello to Mr. Sombra. He's going to be renting the extra guest room upstairs.” Derpy explained. Dinky walked up and looked Sombra over. The flowing black mane, the armored chest plate, kingly attire, the green eyes, the flowing purple wisps of concentrated evil that leaked from his eyes, the fangs. How does a pony get fangs anyway? Yeah, this pony screamed comic book villain to Dinky. “Mom, couldn't you bring home a normal pony for once?” Derpy blushed in embarrassment from her daughter's reply as she glanced at Sombra, unsure if he would be offended. “What do you mean by that Muffin?” Derpy asked. “I mean, the first one was that doctor guy and he was all wibble wobble timely-wimey and now this guy? Just look at him.” She said pleadingly to her mom. “What does that mean?!” Sombra finally shouted having reached his tolerance of this little brat. “You look like you're about to knock over the Ponyville Bank or steal 40 cakes from Sugar-Cube Corner or something.” She answered without the least bit of fear as she turned her attention to Sombra, ignoring her mother's pleas for her to stop being rude. “What? JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?! I would never steal 40 cakes from anywhere!” Sombra loudly declared. “See?” Derpy said with a smile as if to prove her point and her judgment of character. “Now let’s all calm down.” “Why with my power I would steal at least twice as many cakes!” Sombra declared proudly, oblivious to the stares he was receiving. “Afterward I would steal 20, no, 40 gallons of ice cream to go with it. Who ever heard of cake without ice cream anyway?” “Would you get chocolate?” Dinky suddenly asked, swept up in the idea of free ice cream. “No way, chocolate is for fillies and metrosexuals. Real stallions can be content with just vanilla and maybe some banana-nut on the side.” He explained. “I love banana-nut ice cream!” Derpy suddenly squealed at the mention of her favorite cold treat. “Absurd! No-pony likes banana-nut.” Sombra exclaimed in disbelief. “Back in my Kingdom there was always a surplus of banana-nut because no-pony ever ate any.” Little did Sombra know was that the reason no one ate any was because everypony was too scared to find out what would happen if he didn't have his banana-nut ice cream. “Yes way. I love banana-nut. It tastes just like the muffin.” The two got caught in a conversation about banana-nut and its various forms. Everything including ice cream, muffins, cake, and various other desserts were mentioned as they completely ignored Dinky. After ten minutes, yes, ten minutes of nothing but banana-nut, Dinky rolled her eyes in aggravation as she left the two and headed to her room upstairs. Sometimes Dinky worried about her mom. She always finds the weirdest guys. Derpy had to admit that Sombra was a strange character. It was almost like he wasn’t use to ponies offering him feedback in conversations. He almost seemed shocked at the idea that somepony else could have interests remotely similar to his own. After a few more minutes of random talk, the mail-mare finally remembered she was supposed to be having a serious talk about Sombra moving in. “Sorry about that.” Derpy giggled nervously as she reached for another muffin, her fifth so far. “I was supposed to go over the details of the move with you and instead I got distracted by muffin flavors.” “It is quite alright, especially when you have to deal with a pony and king as charismatic as myself.” He replied, taking no offense to the sudden change in topics as he himself reached for a new muffin, his third. “I must know, did you bake these muffins yourself? Not even my best cooking slaves could bake something this delicious.” Derpy blinked in confusion for a second. “Did he just say slave? I must being hearing things. He's foreign so it's properly just some fancy foreign word for maid or something.” “Yup, they're kind of the only thing I can bake without messing up.” “Yet your cutie mark is bubbles? Why is that?” Sombra asked, the question bugging him since he first laid eyes on the derp-eyed mare's flank. “I don't know; must be because of my bubbly personality.” She answered with a bright smile. “Not many people notice it though.” She admitted under her breath. “Hmm, I see. Well cutie marks are strange things, yet we as ponies take great pride in them. I can understand the aggravation one must go through when they aren't recognized for their special talent.” “Really?” She asked, unsure if she should believe him. “Really” Sombra replied, “now about this room.” “Oh yeah, it’s one room and three meals a day. If you want to eat more or something besides what I cook then that will be from your pocket. The front door locks at 10PM and no loud noise after 9PM because Dinky has school in the mornings. Rent is due on the fifth of every mouth, but I know you're new here and don't have work so I can give you the first month free.” “I am not a charity case. I am King Sombra, rightful heir to the Crystal Empire. I have plenty of money saved up for just such occasions.” He boasted, forgetting once more the definition of incognito, as he levitated his bag and dumped out the contents onto the table. Coins, crystals and various other treasures poured out. “I wish to pay three months in advance, will that be acceptable.” He offered with a proud smile. Derpy studied the coins, each one minted with Sombra's face and etched with the saying, “Remember, you are here for life.” “How much are these worth in Equestrian bits?” Derpy asked, though it was hard to tell if she was giving him a scrutinizing stare or not since her eyes refused to stay still. “Back in my day, each Crystal Empire coin was equal to ten Equestrian bits.” “Hmm, I'll have to check with the bank about that, but I guess it's a start. We'll settle on the final price once I've done that. Your room is upstairs, last door on the right. Two bathrooms, one down the hall here and the upstairs is the first door on the right.” She explained. “Hmm, I couldn't tell how big this place was from the outside: Rather spacious really.” Sombra pondered. “Yup, but that's about all. I would like to officially welcome you to House Hooves!” She happily exclaimed. Sombra wasn't sure if she was talking to him or the wall though. This mare was naive, partially blind and didn't seem all that bright. The former king gave a devilish grin. “Perfect.” He hissed as he began laughing once more at the thought of exploiting this blonde mare. Derpy tilted her head in confusion at seeing Sombra laughing so suddenly. “He must be really happy to have a place to stay.” She said to herself with a smile. End Chapter 2