//------------------------------// // Chapter 26 // Story: Heroes For Equestria // by CSFORLIFEFUL //------------------------------// Chapter 26: Drunken soldiers 5 days later... Yuri's house is now complete and Kay is helping Yuri moving the weapons supply to the house. After they finish moving all the weapons, both of them takes a rest. Yuri: Thanks for the help, comrade. Kay: Not a problem. Boy, to be honest, this doesn't look like a house. It's more like a weapons house if you ask me. Yuri: This is home for me. You see, back at my motherland I was security for the gun supply, and sometimes I even sleep in the weapons room, so I got used to it. Kay: You sure you don't want a bed with that? Pinkie Pie said she got an old bed kept in the basement for to long, she thinks you might need it. Yuri: Spasibo, a bed is what this place need. Vodka? Kay: No thanks, I don't drink. You have that all the time? Yuri: Da, and this will be the last bottle. Kay: Well, Applejack got some cider back at her place. Why don't you try them? Yuri: That's some good word for a man who doesn't drink. Kay: I don't touch those stuff anymore. Alright, I'm just gonna stay here. Yuri: Okay then, I'll be going. Yuri left the house, while Kay stay to check out the gun supply. On the way there, Yuri stumbles upon Josh. Josh: Hey, Yuri. Where you heading to? Yuri: I'm going to get some cider at Applejack's farm, wanna come? Josh: Well, since I got nothing today, alright. Yuri: Da! Lets get some booze! Sweet Apple Farm Yuri and Josh arrives and greet by Big Mac. Big Mac: Welcome, now what can ah' do for you folks? Yuri: I'm down to my last bottle of vodka, and I heard you got ciders here! Got any strong ones? Big Mac: We might have them strong ciders here. We don't really sale them so they're my ciders, but y'all can drop in and take a drink here anytime you want. Yuri: Spasibo! Lets get drunk! Josh: Can't believe I'm doing this, but okay. Big Mac's private place After drink few cups of strong cider, the three are now drunk....really drunk. Yuri: You know, I use to wonder why World War 2 happen untill I watch History Channel!! Big Mac: Ah don't know what you're talking about but its funny! Josh: Guys! Guys! Wanna know something! Big Mac & Yuri: Yeah? Josh: Five days ago I kissed Twilight...AND I LIKE IT!! Big Mac & Yuri: HAHAHAHAHAHHA!!! Big Mac: Ya should play her horns! I heard unicorns got turn on by doing that! Yuri: I get turn on when a woman give me a lap dance! Hey! Where are the womens!! Josh: Yuri! You stupid ass, we're not in a strip club!! We're in a fucking room where this big ass pony spends his day drinking and jerking off to who ever he wants to jerk off to!! Big Mac: How you know that! You're a pyschic! Here, more drinks for you!! Yuri's house After checking the gun supplies, Kay took a nap but then experience a nightmare. Kay's dream Thug: You're going to give the stuff or what? Kay: Show me the money first, then I give you the stuff. Thug: Alright then. (show Kay a briefcase full of money) Here's your money, kid. Kay: No, this ain't enough! Thug: Look, tell your boss to fuck off and take the money!! Kay: This ain't enough, asshole!! Thug: What is this, charity? Just take the fucking money, give me the stuff, and fucking leave! Bill: (pushes Kay away)Are you fucking deaf!!! This money is ain't enough, dick brain! Kay: Bill! Stay out of this! Bill: You always said that Kay! "Stay back", "Leave this to me", "Stay out of this", FUCK YOU!! Thug: Is this shitty drama over yet! Take the money and leave, assholes!! Bill: I won't leave untill you give us the proper amount of money! Thug: Or why don't I smoke you first!(aims his gun at Bill and shoots him) Kay: BILL!!(aims his gun at the thug) Kay awakes and quickly aims his gun at Twilight, who came visit the house. Kay: *sigh* Sorry. I-I just got a nightmare... Twilight: Is it Discord? Kay: No...just my past....I don't wanna talk about. So, why you here for? Twilight: Just wanna check out the house, and it's looks great, except it need more decorations. Kay: Well, in Yuri's book, he considers this boxes of guns as decorations. Twilight: Oh. Anyway, have you seen Josh somewhere? Kay: No, haven't seen him. Somewhere around Ponyville Yuri and Josh are still drunk, walking around aimlessly. Josh: Yuriiii.....where the hell are we going..... Yuri: I'm to drunk....to know where I step my foot. Hey Ivan!!! Your wife look like a bear!! Did you marry a bear!!! Then suddenly, Yuri accidently bumps into Rarity. Yuri: Sorry mister, I didn't see you there.. Rarity: Mister?! I am a mare! Are you blind! Yuri: I!! Am not blind....just drunk!!! And your hair is very swirly!! Makes me want to THROW UP!! Rarity: How dare you! Yuri: How dare I? How dare I!!! I dare!! Josh: You show him, Yuri! His hair make me want to throw up! Rarity: I told, I am a mare!! Yuri: What? I'm too drunk to listen!! Rarity has enough of their insults and she use her magic to levitate them. Josh: Yuri look! I'm flying! I'm flying! Yuri: You look like a bird, Josh!! Hey mister! Make us fly faster! Rarity: You wanna fly? I'll make you fly!! Rarity then throws them to the ground and the two fainted. Kay and Twilight heard the comotion and rush to the site. Twilight: Rarity, what happen here? Rarity: Those two insulted my hair and called me a "he"!! Twilight: What? What would they do that? Kay: Cause they're drunk, they smell like cider. Strong one if you ask me. Rarity: Well, that's not a reason to insult me! Kay: They're drunk, and they can't think straight. We have to get them out of here. Kay lift the two and carry them to Yuri's house. Twilight: It's alright Rarity. They don't mean that. They're just....drunk. Yuri's house Kay: Alright, you two just lay your asses here. Kay left the two drunken soldiers and heads out. Then, a royal guard arrive to meet Kay. Royal guard: Shining Armor wants to see you three at Canterlot. Kay: The other two are still drunk, so I'll just have to go without them. Royal guard: Very well then, follow me. Canterlot Shining Armor: Kay, it's good to see you. Kay: Good to see you too. Shining Armor: Where are the others? Kay: Their not in a combat mode right now, so I'm the only one here. Shining Armor: Well, it's better than nothing. Kay: So, what chu' want me here for? Shining Armor: Our spy as return and he told us that the enemy is making another bomb. Kay: Another bomb? Motherfuckers don't want to quit. How many are we talking about? Shining Armor: Just one- Kay: Just one?! What is this? A joke? Shining Armor: Let me finish. Just one bomb, but it's a big one. He said that this one will completely wipe out Equestria. Kay: ......okay, that ain't no joke. Shining Armor: According to our spy, the bomb is located inside Discord's underground base. We need you to go there and destroy it before it's too late. Kay: Roger that.