//------------------------------// // The Mystery of the Wandering Stallion (1) // Story: Pinkamena Diane Pie: Consultant Detective // by Time Pony Victorious //------------------------------// Twilight Sparkle was unable to sleep. How could she? After all, she had just been accepted as Princess Celestia's personal pupil just this morning! The little filly could hardly contain herself when the Princess showed up and asked to personally teach her, her parents needed to strap her down in order to stop her from bouncing about like a mad pony. Oh, and don't forget about her cutie mark! Although, it was a bit hard to figure out after a little while, it looked like a sunburst with nice shimmering crystals surrounding it. She didn't really know what it meant, though, after some explanation from the Princess she had hazarded a guess that it was magic. Enigmatic, indeed, she didn't even know that magic as a cutie mark was a possibility! After all, magic was just an overgeneralized term describing the potentiality of all ponies, not merely unicorns. All ponies were capable of magic in some form or another; the most obvious were the corporeal and tangible levitation abilities of unicorns. Nature affinities from the earth ponies, passive wind abilities and weather manipulation from the pegasi, and so on. Magic was everywhere. Was the cutie mark the result of her "raw" ability, like the Princess stated? The thoughts, however intricate, weren't enough to impede her excitement. She was sent off to the Princess's castle as soon as she was able, and even though she was anxious to go, she couldn't help but feel saddened at the prospect of leaving her family. "This will open up a whole new world for you!" promised her father. "Go! You will learn so much," added her mother. "You'll love it, plus, it's the princess Twily!" remarked her brother. Therefore, after a heartfelt, yet reluctant, goodbye, she was off. Excited to see what awaited her, Twilight had so many questions for the Princess, all of which were answered with infinite patience and incredible kindness. After the 205th question, however, the Princess decided it was time for bed. So, she left Twilight in her own room while she went off the lower the sun and bring the night. But, as mentioned, Twilight was unable to sleep. She sat at her desk (lovely, by the way) reading, trying to make herself sleepy, but nothing was working. She read about philosophy, physics, pharmaceuticals, photosynthesis, even pudding! But nothing worked, although it did make her severely interested in cooking, maybe she'll look something up when she gets back home. Home. Closing her book, Twilight stared out of the window and toward the night sky. She was barely gone a day and was already homesick. Maybe she should tell Princess Celestia to simply take her home, this personal tutelage doesn't seem right for her. No, no, then what would her parents think? Twilight Sparkle, the pony personally picked out by the Princess to be her pupil preemptively preparing her leave on the first day? An embarrassment really. No, the Princess picked Twilight for a reason, she doesn't do anything without good reason, and she wouldn't have picked her if she didn't think there was something special about Twilight. Twilight rubbed her eyes and went back to her book, her thoughts weren't making her tired, instead they were having an opposite effect; they were keeping her up and irritated. "'Orion'"-- she read aloud --"'Sometimes called The Hunter, is a prominent constellation located on the-" The room shook. A deep rumbling noise took Twilight by surprise as everything, even herself, shook, as though an earthquake suddenly localized in her room. The shaking wasn't violent, in fact, it was fairly subtle, and if Twilight were sleeping she'd probably have slept right through it! But it was obvious enough for her to notice it. What was that? Shutting her book, she glared out the window to stare at the starry night. Nothing, the castle grounds were undisturbed… she guessed, it was too dark to see anything! More rumbling snapped her back to reality, she nearly fell from her spot, the rumbling felt stronger and… above her. An impossibly loud wooshing noise took her by surprise as a meteor flew right over the castle, into her line of sight, and past the castle grounds! No, wait, it wasn't a meteor, it was too… small. Then, as the UFO fell out of sight, she heard a small thud; collision. Jumping away from the desk, she grabbed the lantern by the door and hesitated for a moment. Should she contact the Princess? After all, she would know what to do, right? Twilight shook her head. The Princess was probably exhausted, setting the sun must not be an easy task. In any case, she should just investigate this more carefully by herself, at first, if any danger is present, she'd contact the Guard. It was a futile attempt in reassuring herself, because she wanted to hide the real reason why she wanted to investigate. Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia's personal pupil, swore she saw a pony in that meteor. Making her decision, she took chase. She had miscalculated how far the UFO traveled and how immense these castle grounds were. Armed with only a simple lantern, Twilight scurried all around the grounds, trying to find the crash site, with no avail. Every time she overtook a hill a larger one just appeared in front of her. After twenty minutes, she was ready to pack it up and go back, until she smelled it. Something smelled burnt and a bit familiar, she only smelled that scent when the pegasus took to the earth. It smelled like ozone. Her heart lifted, maybe she found it. She ran toward the hill in front of her, the scent getting stronger, very literally, as she neared the top of the hill. She could hear something burning, and electricity crackling. What was it that crashed?! Reaching the summit, she looked with unbridled excitement at the bottom of the hill to find a massive crater. And within the crater, she spotted it: a large blue box? It was flipped on its side, but it just looked like a normal… box. Nothing remarkable about it except… Twilight tilted her head to read it properly."Police Box?" Then, the box doors opened, Twilight jumped back slightly, aiming her lantern at it. "W-who's there?" her voice betraying her insatiable curiosity. Tentatively, a hoof popped out of the box and tried to steady itself. Then, very suddenly, a stallion had propped himself over the box, panting, soaking wet, and wearing the most peculiar clothes. She fixed the light on him so that she could see better. He was chestnut brown with a darker brown mane, his eyes are of the lightest of blue, and he wore a very large, very tattered, brown coat. "Well!" he said delightfully cheerful despite how strange he appeared. "That didn't go very well. I wonder why the TARDIS acted wonky like that, probably hadn't adjusted for the sudden transition to normal space in this particular- oh, hello! Are you- is that a unicorn! Fantastic! An actual unicorn, this place is getting more interesting than I thought!" This stallion had a strange accent, probably from Hoofington, he spoke quickly and muttered a lot, his eyes were excitable and full of impossible energy, but Twilight saw something else there… "Purple?" he frowned. "What an odd color, but then again you are a unicorn after all!" "Who are you?" Twilight asked, more irritated with this stallion's eccentricity. "Ah, yes, a question!" his eyes lit up brilliantly. "A boring one at that, the more interesting question, however, is, do you have any pears?" Twilight stepped back, almost startled at his question, before fixing a quiet look of concentration into those bright blue eyes of his. "No, why?" "Are you lying to me?" "No, I am telling the truth." "Good!" Then the stallion pushed himself up off the blue box and leapt right out, landing a few feet away from Twilight, "Lovely to meet you, I'm-" Just as quickly as he got on his hooves, he fell right back down, tumbling over himself like some sort of foal. He fell flat on his face, but managed to complete his introduction, although it was a bit muffled with the mud in his mouth, "-The Doctor." "Doctor?" Twilight repeated. "You don't seem like a doctor." The Doctor then removed his face from the ground and grinned at Twilight, but he didn't stand back up, he was having trouble, it seems, getting his bearings. "Oh? Then what do I seem like then, uh, miss…" "Twilight Sparkle," she supplied. "And you're just… weird, what is that thing you climbed out of, and why can't you stand up properly like a normal pony?" "Weird is good, weird is fantastic! Without weird we would only have those boring Sunday afternoons and dreadful Thursdays, no, with weird we get supernovas, neutron stars, and Saturdays! You see Glitter Dawn-" "Twilight Sparkle," she corrected. "Weird makes everything fun." Twilight rolled her eyes, for an adult, he didn't live up to the expectations. This "Doctor" acted mostly like a child, gleefully smiling at the prospect of getting into trouble if it meant the chance of adventure. "As to why I can't stand up, well, it appears that my legs aren't functioning properly," he tried to push himself back up, but overexerted and flipped himself over until he was lying flat on his back. "Gravity is normal here, well, as normal as it can get with a talking purple unicorn, but I can't seem to orient myself properly. It might have something to do with the fact-, oh my! Hooves?" The Doctor sat back up and stared at his forelegs as if he just noticed them, "Hooves!" he smiled mischievously, as if sharing a private joke with Twilight, he then felt his face and brushed his hooves over his mane. "Horse snout, thick mane, ah, still not ginger, and-" he looked at his backside and laughed. "A great bushy tail! Oh my, that's different!" "Are… you okay?" Twilight asked, if this pony didn't even know he was a pony then she may need to exercise caution, "Did you hit your head or something?" "I'm always okay! I'm just a horse! That's something that doesn't happen every day." Much like a foal, he awkwardly stood on his legs, knees wobbling with uncertainty. "Pony," she corrected, "The correct term is pony." Suddenly, with unbridled vigor, the Doctor was right in front of Twilight, nose to nose, his curious eyes boring into her own. "You're a smart one Afternoon Shimmer, then again, I suppose even a little girl like you would know the difference between ponies and horses," he laughed again, showing off his eccentric smile before he frowned and chomped down on his teeth and tilted his head at Twilight, "New teeth… that's weird." "First off, it's Twilight Sparkle, and second off, the difference is obvious: ponies are generally much shorter than horses, they also have thicker manes and tails and heavier coats, it's really quite obvious." "I see, and what's this here on my rump? Looks like some sort of brand!" The Doctor then glanced at his flank, barely covered by his long brown tattered coat, to show off a strange cutie mark: a golden hourglass. Twilight rolled her eyes, how could an adult pony not know the basics already? He must've hit his head or something, he certainly hadn't denied it when she asked before. "It's your cutie mark," she explained. "It describes your special talent. Since yours is an hourglass your talent is probably… time!" "Yes! That's me, the Time Pony. Or is it Lord of Pony Time?" The strange earth pony then began to trot in a circle, awkwardly walking with his legs slightly shaking, as if each step hurt. "But then, what does your, ah, cutie mark mean? It looks quite strange." Coming from this mad pony who popped out of a box, she wasn't very insulted. "It represents my special talent; magic." "That doesn't really look like magic really," he said. "It looks more like a… sunburst, really." "It's a bit ambiguous," she admitted. "But I have a lot of magical ability, the Princess said so herself, you know?" She explained this with such pride in her voice that she had puffed out her chest and closed her eyes, waiting for him to exclaim in an impressed tone of voice. But silence had only answered her; she opened her eyes to see the Doctor running all around this hill. He was looking at the grass, sniffing the trees, and even licking rocks! All the while mumbling to himself in his excitable manner. "Magic, you say?" he remarked half-heartedly. "Aren't all unicorns capable of that? You know, with the magical horns and stuff?" "Yes, but, wait!" Twilight had to run to catch up with the awkwardly tumbling Doctor as he rushed past her and went toward the castle. "Unicorns can perform magic, but the basic kind! Since my specialty is magic, I can do a lot more than normal unicorns!" The Doctor may not have heard Twilight, as he showed no indication that he was listening. Instead, he continued mumbling to himself as he ran away. "Why did the TARDIS send me here? As a horse?" "Pony," Twilight corrected. "And wait!" Magic gathered at her horn, she hadn't yet used this spell yet, but her small little legs couldn't keep up with the Doctor even if he didn't have full use of his yet. With a swift crackle and a flash of light, Twilight disappeared from her spot and reappeared right in front of the Doctor. "What is the TARDIS, who exactly are you? You seem awfully suspicious for a doctor, w-wait, what're you, AH!" Without stopping, the Doctor ran right over Twilight, but instead of trampling the little filly, she tried to jump to avoid him but ended up bumping right into his body, flipping up and landing right on his back. "Time And Relative Dimension in Space, and honestly Daytime Sparkle-" "You're getting close at least," she remarked sarcastically. "-I thought you were smarter than that. I already told you, I'm the Doctor." "Doctor Who?" "Even unicorns will say that then huh," he snickered as he trotted along. "Where are you going?" Twilight asked, desperate to get some information from this strange pony, she hated not knowing something. The Doctor stopped immediately, causing Twilight to fall off his back and land on the ground. Before she could get up, the Doctor was already in front of her, nose-to-nose. His playful expression was gone and replaced by a moderately serious one, his eyebrows were furrowed and his intense blue eyes seemed to pierce her very soul, as if he wanted to will her life-story out of her. "The TARDIS may be acting a bit… erratic as of late, but she doesn't take me somewhere where I don't need to be. Wherever, or whenever, this place is, it must be important. Right now, I'm trying to figure out what's so important about this place," he explained with a smile. "Any questions? No? Didn't think so! Now, in the words of a very important m-, er, that is, pony, allons-y!" Frowning, the Doctor quietly repeated that strange word to himself. "Did I really used to say that? No, no, I'll need to think of something different something new." "Think of what?!" Twilight asked, very close to yelling at this Doctor. "A catchphrase! Every hero has a catchphrase, and if I'm going to be a pony hero, I'll need an accommodating catchphrase." "Like Mare Do Well?" As soon as Twilight said that, however, she bit her tongue. Why had she let it slip that she knew Mare Do Well? Twilight was a very serious academic pony, always focused on her work, but there were times, quite rare mind you, where she would take a break from reading those dusty old books and read comics. Her favorite was The Adventures of the Mysterious Mare Do Well, a relatively new comic series that Twilight got hooked on when she accidentally checked that out instead of a book on astrophysics. "Mare Do Well, who is he?" The Doctor asked. "She is a superhero, of sorts. She's a comic book character, her real name is Felicity Peridot, and she's an intrepid reporter for-" "Yeah, yeah, yeah, but why did you mention her first? What's so important about her?" he asked again impatiently. "N-nothing, she was just the first to come to mind, that's all." Twilight quickly explained. The Doctor looked behind her quickly and, for a fraction of a second, his eyes widened but to avoid alerting her, his neutral calm expression reappeared and he stared right at her. "Describe her, go on, her outfit and everything," he asked in his rapid-fire speech. "Um, well, Felicity is a unicorn who-" "No, no, I meant her costume, Mare Do Well, what is her costume like?" "Oh, well, her original costume was pretty cool, but in the Ultimate Universe she got a redesign and-" she stopped when she saw the Doctor's glare intensified at her digression, "But, um, her original costume was mostly black and purple. She wore form-fitting tights that covered her entire body, a black mask with purple eyes, a large collar, a long billowing cape and-" "A very large purple hat," the Doctor finished. "Yeah, how did you know that?" she asked naïvely. "Twilight Sparkle, what I need you to do is to continue looking at me. Under no circumstances will you turn around, do you understand?" "Wait, why?" she turned her head slightly but the Doctor stopped her, holding her cheeks with his hooves and turned it back so she was still face to face with him. "No!" he said, "Never break eye-contact with me, do you understand?" "Doctor…" her voice became a little shaky with how sudden his change in mood was, one moment he was cheerfully bouncing like a mad pony and the next he spoke frostily and seriously, "What's going on? Doctor, what's behind me?" "Twilight," he started, ignoring her question, "Do you know how when you're scared and adults try to calm you down by promising you that everything will be alright and you suspect them of lying?" "Y-yeah?" Then, he pressed his head against her forehead and smiled that delightfully cheerful yet arrogant grin, "Everything will be alright Twilight, trust me, I'm the Doctor." Her vision went black and the next thing she heard was the sound of an explosion. ~--~ Daylight filtered through my window, unnecessarily bathing me in its warmth, rousing me from my sleep. I shook slightly, startled at this sudden greeting from Celestia's sun. Refusing to open my eyes, I grumbled under my breath and dug deeper within my blankets. Last night was exhausting. Pinkie and I spent the entirety of it running through the rather dirty streets of Manehattan, searching for a pony that had escaped the mental hospital a week ago. By the time we found the squirrely escapee, I was ready to slip into a week-long coma with how tired I was. I don't remember how and when I got home, but this bed was too comfortable to leave. Wrapping my legs around my pillow, I hugged it, happy for its warmth and feel. Except… wait, it felt like fur and I could feel a heartbeat under my hooves. I opened my eyes and saw a bright wall of pink in front of me, because the pillow I was hugging was Pinkie Pie, whose face was only inches away from mine. If I had jumped any higher I would've taken to the skies. "P-P-P-Pinkie! What're you…" I stammered stupidly as I sat there on the foot of my bed. Pinkie, now fully awake from my brief lapse into insanity, stared at me past the blankets and gave me a small smile. "Good morning Twi!" she chirped before yawning which made me yawn (stupid sympathetic yawn). "Pinkie, why were you sleeping in my bed?" Pinkie frowned and tilted her head curiously. "Because you invited me to, remember?" I thought back to last night but couldn't recall anything. I don't remember getting home or even getting into bed! Had I… Oh Celestia, please tell me I didn't. "P-Pinkie, did we… I mean, were we…." I couldn't muster up the courage to spit it out, how could I ask her if we… you know? She leapt off the bed and patted my head. "We were both tired from the case last night, and as I was about to go back home you suggested I spend the night here so I don't have to walk far. I was supposed to stay on my side of the bed, but you crawled over and hugged me!" She laughed innocently. "You were pretty warm Twi." I'm sure I turned as red as a beet as I felt warmth tickle my cheeks. The only thought that had occurred to me was that Pinkie and I hadn't done anything… well, risqué last night, a mixture of disappointment and contentment had churned in my stomach; or perhaps I was just hungry. "S-sorry about that then," I muttered, feeling particularly sorry for myself. Pinkie shook her head. "Nah, it's okay, I slept pretty well! Except for when you jumped out of bed like that, that was scary. Did something bite you? Ooh! Did a radioactive spider bite you and now you have superpowers?" Her little deviation had made me feel a little better. To know that she didn't seem affected by our sleeping conditions, I would hate to think that I was an uncomfortable pillow or that my breath smelled bad. Ah, maybe I should cut that part out… Anyhow, Pinkie and I fixed ou- er, that is to say, my bed and we went downstairs. Although my ears were still ringing from the prospect of sleeping with Pinkie (I'm not a pervert, I'm just saying it was kinda nice waking up to see her) my mind was still clouded from that dream. It was a dream from when I was younger, when I had spent my first night at Celestia's castle as her official student. I was so excited that I could barely sleep and then, from out of nowhere, a UFO crashed! Like the silly filly that I was, I investigated. It was there I met the Doctor for a very brief twenty seconds. In a lot of ways, he reminded me of Pinkie, so blissfully cheerful with excitement gleaming in his eyes. But I remember those eyes, they were so old as if he had seen the infinite expanses of everything and was consequently burdened. Afterward, I don't really remember much. I remember the Doctor's last words to me "Trust me, I'm the Doctor." then the next thing I knew, I woke up in my room with a bunch of books thrown around on the floor, it was morning and I was at my desk as if I had been there all night. Desperately, I had called the Royal Guard and insisted that the Doctor existed and that everything the night previous was true. I even showed them the crash-site but, to my surprise, the Doctor's strange vessel (what had he called it?... The TARDIS?) and its occupant was gone. The Guard was convinced that I was just a sleep deprived filly who had a nightmare, but the Princess wasn't so sure. She asked me to recollect everything from that night. Nervously, I explained everything. The more and more I talked the less sense I was beginning to make, even I couldn't believe my own story. I was beginning to lose faith and I imagined Celestia was as well, until I mentioned the Doctor. Her eyes widened like saucers, she stepped closer to me and asked. "The Doctor? You met him? What did he say? Did he do anything?" Naturally, I was terrified. I had never seen the Princess act so passionately before, so, I did what any other filly would do in that situation. I lied. I told her that it was probably a dream; that I had read about a cartoon character that was a doctor and made him up. The Princess wasn't convinced but she hadn't pressed the issue. Still, I couldn't help but think, even to this day, that the Princess knew the Doctor. Maybe she had heard of him or maybe she actually met him? Whatever the case is, the Doctor was a very strange pony and I would hate to imagine what it would be like if he met up with Pinkie. I wasn't sure why I was thinking about him, or even why I had a dream about him last night, but I was very distracted and Pinkie had very predictably noticed. "What's wrong?" she asked with those impossibly large eyes of hers. "Nothing," I lied. "Just had a weird dream." "Oh, me too!" she jumped grinning madly. "I had a dream where I was like four hundred feet tall and could eat the clouds and drink rainbows! It was cool until the giant robot started to attack, but hey, what're you gonna do? It was part of the giant robot parade." I giggled as she explained her strange dream because it was just like Pinkie to inadvertently cheer me up with her eccentricity. I felt very compelled to tell her about my dream, but I wasn't sure how she was going to react to it; would she laugh at me? Call me crazy or imaginative? No, this is Pinkie we're talking about; she wouldn't make fun of me. "Pinkie, I-" "Oh, Twi, I gotta head out soon actually," interrupted Pinkie as she headed into the other room. "Princess Celestia is waiting for me to bring something to her." "Wait, the princess called you?" I asked, following her, why would the princess call her and not me? "What does she want?" "Top secret business Twi, you understand right?" I frowned, very offended that my own teacher, the mare that practically raised me like a surrogate mother (actually, I would rather think of her as an elder sister) would be more interested in taking Pinkie over me! Don't misunderstand my dear readers; I'm not angry at Pinkie, just… confused. Did both of them just not want to be with me today? Dear Celestia, I sound like a filly. I know that I haven't talked to Celestia in a while, but still, couldn't she have, I don't know, sent a letter to say hi? Then again, it isn't like I've sent any letters to her either. "Yeah, I guess," I answered finally, my voice faltering. The ever hyper-observant Pinkie noticed my sudden change in mood and turned around with a big smile on her face. "Don't worry Twi, just going to bring something to her then I'll be back in a jiffy!" To top it off, the wonderfully silly pony hugged me; like a mother comforting her foal. Pinkie giggled into my neck which tickled me causing me to giggle back. "Jiffy huh? Isn't that a weird word? It's like, what are you? A measurement of time or distance?" she mused innocently. "Yeah… weird." It was about eight o'clock when she left. The Royal Guard had sent a chariot to pick her up, and she waved goodbye to me as I stood pathetically at the library doors, watching her fly away. It felt like I was some distressed bride, biding goodbye to my lover. Maybe I should scratch that part out… Anyways, with Pinkie gone I had literally nothing to do. Spike was also in Canterlot on official royal duties, so there is no one here to keep me company, well, except for Gummy and Owlowiscious, but the two stoic pets paid me no mind as I sat depressingly at my desk. Owlowiscious flew over to me with a plate of food in his beak. "Hoo," he advised. "No thank you," I answered. "I'm not hungry…" "Hoo." "No, not thirsty either." "Hoo." "I don't know, she said in a jiffy, and I looked up the word in every dictionary I own, and I still don't know what it means!" "Hoo." "You're right… I can't just mope around like this, I'm not some foal who is missing her friend. You're right Owlowiscious, gosh, you always know what to say." "Hoo." "You. I'm talking about- Oh, ha, very funny Owlowiscious," I giggled as the owl kindly, and partially, bowed and flew off, content that he had cheered up her owner. But Owlowiscious was right, Pinkie wouldn't want me moping around like a sad pony. She'd want me to be happy, after all, the heart grows fonder with distance! … I'm definitely going to scratch that part out. But, as I got up the entire library shook. I had to struggle to maintain vertical as I heard a familiar sound that chilled my bones. It was an almost lyrical wooshing of the air, as if the universe was having difficulty breathing. Then, after a few seconds, a loud thud shook the library and I turned toward the source of the sound to see an impossibility. Because standing over at the corner was a very tall blue box with the words "POLICE BOX" written on the top of it. The very same police box I had seen years ago as a filly. It couldn't be. No, it simply couldn't be, it was as the guard said! It was just a dream! It isn't real, it can't be real, and there is no such thing as materializing boxes and crazy ponies that ride it… What if the Doctor was… No, no, Twilight get rational! He can't exist, he's just a dream. The doors opened inward and a stallion poked his head out and looked at me with a wide smile. I stood frozen as I recognized those bright blue eyes filled with energy. It was the Doctor. "Hello!" he chirped. "I was wondering, do you have anything to eat?"