//------------------------------// // Chapter 4 // Story: Music of My Soul // by BronyBrozly //------------------------------// I was standing in the middle of a void. There was nothing there besides me and a wall of mirror that stretched as far as I can see. I heard no sound, felt no wind and even saw nopony besides my reflection in the mirror in front of me. My reflection: a cream colored earth stallion with spiky silver mane, stood idly. As I walked closer, the reflection did the same, like I expected a reflection would do. I reached out a hoof, touching the mirror and the reflection in front of me. I felt the coldness of the mirror slowly crept over to my hoof, looking in my reflection’s blue eyes. Then, my eyes widened as I felt warmth spread through the mirror and my image went blurry. In a blink of an eye, I saw her: Cotton. She was doing like I did with the mirror, our hoof touched and we felt each others warmth through it. I saw her brown eyes looked into mine as tears started to brim in the corner of her eyes, smiling warmly at me. Yet... for some reason I felt scared, worried and confused. I didn’t know why I felt those feelings at that moment since... since last night. Suddenly, I felt the ground below me started to shake, the mirror started to crack and Cotton slowly faded away before my eyes. Her smile, her eyes and her face slowly faded away as the ground shook harder and the mirror cracked between us. I tried to scream, yell and shriek but I was silent. I heard no voice, felt no warmth and felt nothing in me as my body cracked into tiny pieces. I let out a deep gasp, my eyes shot open as I looked onto the buzzing light above me. I felt my chest was heaving slowly as if something was placed on top of me. Before I could do anything, I felt something moved in my hooves. I slowly sat up and my eyes widened upon seeing what I saw. Cotton! Cotton was soundly asleep in my hooves as her head rested on my belly – on the couch. I was... I was stunned! I didn’t know how she got there. I wanted to say something as I opened my mouth but I didn’t know what to say, even what to think at that time. All I can think was what I saw. A mare was sleeping with me on the couch. Then my ears twitched, hearing her soft yawn rang in my ears. She groggily sat up on top of me with her hooves touched my chest. I saw her head sleepily scanned around the main room, rubbing the sleep off her eyes. Her mane was disheveled and her eyes were still half-open as she let out another soft yawn, stretching her hooves into the air. I didn’t know what to do. I felt blood rushed into my head and cheeks, looking at the mare who was casually sitting on my stomach. Her eyes darted towards me as she finally noticed that she was sitting on top of me. A small smile started to crack on her lips. “Morning,” she yawned as she was looking at me with a wince and a smile. That’s all she had to say?! I mentally screamed. “Morning,” I replied with a nervous grin on my face, trying to force a chuckle. “U-um,” I began, stammering. “W-why are you sitting on top of me?” I asked with a sheepish smile, blushing. “I thought you were lonely out here so I decided to give you some company,” she softly replied as she leaned against my body, nuzzling my neck. Whoa! WHOA! My head screamed in alarm, trying my best to shake off any unsavory thoughts away from this situation. “B-but, I’m fine. You don’t have to do that for me,” I stammered as my face turned redder than a tomato. “I know,” she yawned softly as her head was resting sideways on top of my chest, feeling her hot breath rubbed against my coat. “But I want to,” she giggled, turning her head towards me. I resisted the urge to laugh because she was tickling my sides with her mane. “B-but why?” I asked, stammering with a look mixed with confusion and worry. “Because..,” she started as she looked away, sitting up on my body once again. “I love you,” she said softly, looking at me with glistening eyes as her pink cheeks turned into a shade of red. I felt a cord in my heart was plucked but... still for some reason I can’t tell what were my feelings for her. I was completely in a state of confusion. My feelings were a jumble of confusing knots of emotions. “You love me too, right?” she asked as her eyes were brimming with tears. She was forcing out a smile to hide her own doubts at that point. We knew. “I..,” I started, looking to my side as I tried to escape her gaze. I still felt her eyes bore into me even though I can’t see her. My feelings and my mind were at war, trying to pinpoint my current feelings and thoughts. “I... don’t know,” I finally spoke up, looking into her brown eyes. They were filled with many things; tears, confusion and most of all, disappointment. “W-why?” she sniffed, tears were rolling down her cheeks as she looked at me. Tears were streaming out from her eyes as she tried to stop them with her hooves, sniffing. I felt her hot tears wet the coat on my stomach. To tell the truth: I was also broken along with her. Not because I rejected her, no. I didn’t reject her. But it was because I can’t even provide the right answer for her. My feelings were a puzzle that was clouded in a miasma of mystery. “Because... I’m confused,” I answered her as I sat up, slowly setting her down on the couch next to me. I grabbed her hooves away from her eyes and made her looked into my eyes. I felt tears were started to brim as well as I forced myself to look into her confused soul. “I can’t say for sure what are my feelings now but... I know in the bottom of my heart that you will have a special place in it,” I continued, looking into her teary red eyes. “You hate me,” she croaked as her eyes started to stream once more. Her words created a deep gash in my heart but I tried to hold back from showing the pain. “No,” I started, whispering as I gently brushed her mane. I lowered my head to meet with her gaze. I made her to look into my eyes with beaming honestly, trying to convince her that the words that will come out next were the truth which came from deep inside my heart. “I don’t hate you but... my feelings right now are... let’s say: in a jumble. The words you said were not let to waste. I wholeheartedly happy to hear that you love me but... I need time. I need time to confirm my own feelings,” I explained, looking deep into her brown eyes as I felt hot tears rolled down my cheeks. “You don’t hate me?” she sniffed, looking at me with her glistening eyes. I let out a smile, shaking my head in return as I can’t speak. I was afraid that I would choke on sadness. Then, I saw the smile that I love to see beamed from her face. It was radiating with hope. Hope that one day I would confess my true feelings for her. She lunged towards me, giving me a tight hug. I felt her chest touched mine, feeling her heartbeat on my chest. Her hot tears rolled down my back as I heard her soft sniffles rang in my ears. “I love you,” she whispered in a raspy voice. “I know,” I replied, gently rubbing her back. Then, she pushed her body away, looking at me with teary eyes and a smile. Before I could even react, I felt her lips touched mine once again but this time it was more like a peck. “I’ll make you fall in love with me,” she giggled with tears still in her eyes. I nodded, smiling in return. “I’ll be waiting for the day,” I chuckled as I wiped her tears away with a hoof. Then she slowly slid off the couch and took several steps towards the kitchen before she twirled to look at me. “Let’s make breakfast,” she giggled with a warm smile beamed from her face. “I can’t cook,” I chuckled as I stood up, walking towards her. “I’ll teach you,” she giggled as she gave me a wink, smiling. The last pearl of tear rolled down her cheeks. I just chuckled and followed her as she entered the small kitchen. From there, my lesson on cooking and another step in our relationship had begun. She was the master of the kitchen as she had a special dance for cooking. I gave my best in listening to her instruction on making pancakes as our laughs filled the kitchen. I stumbled a few times which resulting me covered with flour and eggs. I gave a confused look as she let out a hearty laugh. With that, I laugh as well. After a few moments of goofing off, she decide to make breakfast herself as she let me watched her and listened to her hum. I felt a cool air brushed against my coat as I walked out of the bathroom. Then, in the corner of my eyes, I saw a note was placed on top of the glass coffee table. I picked it up and began to read. “I made extra pancakes for you if you got hungry. Also, I might be home late tonight and good luck on your search for a talent scout today!” the letter concluded. I had a smile on my face as I read it a couple more times, imagining her smiling face as she would say those words. I walked towards the front door as I set down the note, picking my saxophones case in my mouth. I gave the place another look before I walked out as I locked it from the inside. I turned my head left and right, looking if there was anypony around. After realizing the coast was clear, I slid the key under the welcoming mat. With that, I headed towards the park that day. I felt the cool morning air brushed against my coat and my mane fluttered in the wind. The warmth of Celestia’s sun washed over my back as its glow bathed Equestria with pure generosity. I walked towards the tree that Cotton and I sat last night and set down my saxophone case under the same tree. I opened the case with a soft click as I tighten the strap of my saxophone to my shoulders. I noticed a group ponies started to gather in front of me with curiosity beamed from their eyes, hearing a wave of whispers broke from the crowd. I smiled as I placed my lips onto the mouth piece. I started to think what song should I play then... something hit me. I felt that I wanted to play that express my feelings. With that, I closed my eyes and emptied my mind from any thoughts. Just listening to what my heart wanted to say. Then the first note that came out was strong and true, flowing straight from my soul and heart. I felt the thumps of my heart and the melody that flowed out created a beautiful piece of music. I tapped my hooves in a beat, creating a calm rhythm for the smooth melody. I shook my head in trance, letting my heart speak through music and let my soul bare to the world to see. I felt a smile tugged on the corner of my lips as I remembered Cotton’s brilliant smile. I felt my heart fluttered in my chest and butteflies in my stomach. As the song was nearing to an end, I poured every last bit of my soul and heart. Then the last note flowed out smoothly into the wind. I took a deep breath as I heard the crowds in front of me let out an orchestra of stomping hooves, cheering for my performance as smiles broke within the crowd. My heart leaped as the crowds walked closer to my opened saxophone case and donated bits into it. Each one who listened gave a bit in the name of generosity. After that, the crowd dispersed back into the park as I heard the whisperings of the early performance. I sat down under the tree, counting the amounts of bits that I earned that day. “One hundred bits,” I mumbled, tapping my chin in thought. Then my eyes widened in realization. If each pony donated one bit per pony, then... I was performing in front of a hundred ponies, I thought to myself. I felt a smile broke open on my face, feeling the sensation of fulfillment but... I still felt something was missing. Maybe it was because I needed more. “I should tell Cotton about this,” I mumbled to myself as I set my saxophone back into its case with a click. But before I could even stand up, my ears twitched as I heard something. A musical note floated in the wind. I looked around the park but I didn’t see anypony was playing an instrument in front of me. Then, I heard the musical note floated again. It was quiet yet full of meaning into it. I looked behind the tree and saw a mint colored unicorn who had a light cyan mane with white highlight leaned against a tree nearby. A golden lyre floated that was wrapped by unicorn’s golden magical aura as her hooves danced on the strings. I walked closer, carrying my saxophone case with me as I was trapped in a trance. I closed my eyes, carefully listened to the emotion behind the music. It was sad yet it was calming as well. I felt my heart was wrapped in a cold sheet of blankets, soothing the pain within. I imagined that I was standing in a middle of a lake, on top of a rock during the night time. The stars above twinkled as the silver moon loomed above me, gracing me with silver glow. The scene was calming yet empty and sad. As the final note was plucked and floated into the air, I snapped back into reality. I felt a tear rolled down my eyes as I touched my damp cheeks. The unicorn was certainly a talented musician, no doubt about. I gave her stomps of appreciation, smiling at the mare as she opened her eyes. She had a surprised look as she saw that I was cheering for her. Then I noticed she let out a blush, looking away in embarrassment. I gave her a nod and started to turn away. “Wait!” I heard her voice called out from behind. I looked over my shoulder and noticed she was walking towards me. I turned once more to look at her, smiling. “Were you listening before?” she asked with a sheepish smile as she nervously scratched the back of her head. “I’m sorry if I was intruding on your privacy,” I started as I mirrored her gesture. “No, I want to thank you actually,” she said, smiling. “I’m Lyra. Lyra Heartstrings,” she added, reaching a hoof at me. “Saxy Tone,” I said, smiling warmly at her as I shook her hoof gently. “Are you here a lot?” she asked as she looked around. “This is my second time here,” I answered with a chuckle. “Are you a street performer?” she asked me, looking at my saxophone case that I was carrying in my mouth. “K-kinda,” I started, setting the case down with a sheepish smile. “I am currently trying to find a musical talent scout or a music producer but luckily I met two ponies who were lending me a hand,” I continued as I brushed my mane nervously. “Me too!” Lyra exclaimed, her eyes sparkled with excitement. “But..” she continued, rubbing her hoof with a sheepish smile. “Sometimes I’m a bit nervous around crowds and I would sometimes choke,” she chuckled nervously. “I got scared in front of crowds sometimes too but it always helped if you put your mind in a happy place,” I admitted with a nod, smiling. “Is that so?” she mumbled, tapping her chin in thought as she looked into the distance. “I should try that sometimes,” she spoke up, giving my hoof a playful bump. “So, where are you heading?” she asked, chuckling. “Oh, I’m going to meet with somepony,” I answered, blushing slightly. “Ooh, you going to meet with your girlfriend?” she cooed playfully, smiling behind her hoof. “N-no!” I blurted but immediately looked away, feeling blood rushed into my cheeks. “It’s... kinda complicated,” I continued, smiling sheepishly at the mare. “Oh,” she said as she lowered her head, looking at me with an apologetic smile. “No, it’s fine,” I said, smiling as I looked into the blue sky above. “She promised that she’ll do her best to try to make me fall in love with her,” I continued, chuckling to myself. “That’s so sweet,” I heard Lyra cooed. I looked her and saw she was giving me an encouraging smile. “I know you’ll do the right thing if the time is right,” she continued with a vigorous nod as her eyes beamed with silent encouragement. “T-thanks,” I chuckled, scratching the back of my head with a sheepish grin on my face. “Well, you better go on your way,” she spoke up, smiling at me. “Right,” I nodded and trotted away. “Wait,” I spoke up, looking over my shoulder. “See you around?” I asked with a grin. “Of course,” she giggled behind her hoof. “See ya,” she said as she waved goodbye to me. With that, I gave another nod, smiling. Then I continued trotted towards Cotton’s diner through the busy sidewalk of Manehattan. A lot of ponies were walking in the city during the middle of the day. But before I reached the diner, I noticed something in the corner of my eyes. I saw a shop that was selling many accessories. “Does Cotton like these kinds of things?” I mumbled to myself as I looked at a shop that had the sign ‘Jewels and More’ hung above it at the rows of shops on my left. “I guess I’ll find out,” I chuckled as I trotted towards it. As I entered the shop, I immediately noticed that I was in a place where I shouldn’t be. There were a lot of mares and not even a scent of stallion in the jewelry store. The shop was small but spacious enough to fit a couple dozen of mares. The walls were lined with rows and rows of jewelry accessories that glimmered under the light. Honestly, I’m not a stallion that had eyes for those kinds of things. I never see myself entering a jewelry shop yet... there I was, looking for a present for Cotton. I knew I only had a hundred bits on me but I guess I can spare some since Cotton showered me with unconditional kindness. Even if I spent one million bits for her, that wouldn’t be enough to cover a fraction of her kindness. It has been literally hours of browsing through every accessory the store could offer and I still had no idea what to buy for her. But then, something sparkled behind a dusty showcase. I had a big smile on my face as I knew it would be a good gift for Cotton. I called the shopkeeper as I tapped on the glass showcase. Then the shopkeeper immediately grabbed the item and wrapped it in a special box. It cost me around seventy bits but... it was worth every cent. I had hidden the gift inside my saxophone case as I carefully placed it where it would not get crushed by my instrument. I continued to head towards the diner with a large grin on my face in the entire time. The diner door let out a ding as I entered through it. The diner was filled with ponies as most of the tables were filled and the counter was almost full. There were also a lot of workers, waiter and waitresses walked in and out the kitchen door. With that, I hastily trotted to my stool, placing my saxophone case under my hooves as I jumped onto my seat. I was waiting for somepony to take my order as I looked around at the chattering ponies in the tables in front of me. Then I saw Cotton was busy jolting something in a notepad as she approached me, not noticing my presence. “What can I do you f--,” she stopped mid-sentence as she finally realized who she was talking to. “Hello, Saxy. You’re a bit early than usual,” she said with a smile, levitating the notepad closer. “Well,” I started with a sheepish smile. “I got a bit lucky on bits today as I performed in front of a big crowd,” I continued as I let out a chuckle. “That’s great!” she exclaimed as she gave me a hug. I felt my cheeks burnt as she was hugging me in front of a crowd in the diner. “Cotton,” I whispered as I tapped her back, feeling blood rushed into my cheeks. “Ponies are watching us.” “O-oh,” she gasped as she quickly released her embrace, clearly blushing. “S-sorry, everypony,” she said as she looked at the crowds behind her with a sheepish smile. I noticed a couple of elderly ponies were chuckling next to me. As I looked at them, I saw the elder stallion gave me an encouraging smile. I nodded sheepishly in return, scratching the back of my neck. “S-so, um,” Cotton stuttered as she coughed into her hoof, levitating the notepad with a blush still clear on her cheeks. “What can I get you?” “Hold on,” I spoke as I reached towards my saxophone case, opening it with a click. “Close your eyes,” I whispered as I popped my head above the counter. “W-what?” Cotton stammered, looking at me with confusion plastered on her face. “Close your eyes,” I repeated, chuckling while my hooves were still under the counter. I saw Cotton’s eyes darted in confusion; her cheeks were red as a tomato. Then she gave me a nod, closing her eyes. I quickly placed a small box that was wrapped in a white wrapping paper and tied by a red ribbon. “Open them,” I whispered with an amused grin on my face. I saw Cotton’s eyes were lit with surprised as she looked at the present in front of her. Then her eyes looked at me in anticipation. “Go ahead, open it,” I chuckled, waving my hoof at the gift that was presented in front of her. Cotton tentatively unwrapped the present and opened the box. She gasped as she put a hoof on her mouth; her eyes were welled with tears. Her horn let out a gentle brown glow, levitating a silver necklace which had orange jewel in the middle of the necklace in the shape of a sunflower. I saw her eyes darted into mine. I noticed her eyes were beaming with surprise and joy. “Y-you got this for me?” she asked, stammering as she looked at the necklace with interest sparkled in her eyes. “Yes. I used the bits I earned today to buy it. But I don’t know if you like i--,” before I could finished, I felt Cotton gave me another tight hug. I felt hot tears rolled down my neck as she sniffed next to my ears. “I love it. Thank you,” she whispered in a raspy voice, sniffing. “It’s nothing,” I chuckled, patting her on the back as I closed my eyes. “Kiss her!” a voice spoke up from the other side of the diner which made other patrons broke into cheers. “W-what?” I stammered as I felt blood once again rushed into my cheeks as my eyes widened upon hearing the bold suggestion. “I don’t think this is a right place fo--,” I was cut once again by a kiss from Cotton, seeing a tear rolled down the corner of her eyes as she had her eyes closed and the fur on her cheeks were damp with fresh tears. Then the crowd and the other workers broke into cheers and stomped their hooves in encouragement. “Thank you,” she once again whispered, parting the kiss with tears of joy rolled down her eyes. “Turn around,” I whispered back, smiling at her as I grabbed the necklace with into my hooves. She nodded, sniffing and turned her back towards me. I slowly slid the necklace onto her neck and gently put the key at the back of the necklace in place. “There,” I whispered, smiling. She turned around and looked at the necklace that was placed on her neck, smiling warmly at it. Her pink coat complimented the silver necklace with orange sunflower shaped jewel quite nicely. “Thank you,” she said once again, her eyes began to well in tears once more. I just chuckled in return, smiling softly at the excited mare. “It’s a thank you gift for you for all the kindness you showered me with,” I explained. She nodded as she looked back at the necklace, admiring its beauty. “H-how do I look?” she asked, looking at me with a coy smile. “Stunning,” I answered, chuckling. Then she chuckled as well, laughing behind her hoof. Her horn let out a brown glow once more, levitating the notepad from before. “W-what can I get you?” she asked as she wiped the tears of joy from her eyes with a hoof, smiling. “Actually, I have to take my leave. I still have a couple of venue to play at,” I said as I closed my saxophone case, looking at her apologetically. “Y-you’re not leaving aren’t you? Couldn’t just stay?” she pleaded, placing a hoof on my shoulder as she looked at me with a slight frown tugged onto her face. I turned my head to look at the clock that was hung above the entrance and noticed it was already five o’clock in the afternoon. Then, I looked at her with a grin. “I supposed I can play here instead,” I chuckled as I jumped back onto my seat. I saw a tremendous amount of joy beamed from her brown eyes as she gave a vigorous nod with a wide smile on her face. “I’ll get you a fresh plate of fried grass,” she giggled as she trotted towards the kitchen but then suddenly stopped mid-pace, looking at me over her shoulder. “For free of course,” she added with a wink. I felt heat rushed into my cheeks as I slowly sunk under the counter. She giggled behind her hoof and continued on her way towards the kitchen, disappearing behind the door. “Well, you did the right thing this time,” I mumbled to myself as I shook my head, chuckling.