The God, The Time Lord, and The TARDIS

by The_Seer


Crash landing in Equestria

The TARDIS's travel was unusually bumpy. The Doctor was busy flipping switches madly while Kami struggled to hang on.

All of the flip switching was useless. The TARDIS spun way off course. She crashed into a clearing of a city. Kami's head was spinning and she couldn't stay standing without wobbling.

The Doctor slipped on his jacket. "Now that wasn't supposed to happen. It seems as though a mysterious power drew her here.." He stepped out of the TARDIS, and a flash of light shone in his eyes. He felt a sharp pain in his head. "Um Kami? We have a problem!"

Kami's head finally stopped spinning and she walked out of the TARDIS. She, too, felt a sharp pain in her head and see a flash of white light. Kami was transformed into a pony! She checked herself over. "Oh well this is interesting. I seem to be a unicorn mare with a grey coat and... blonde hair... Lovely." She looked over at The Doctor. "Oh you are cute as a pony, Doctor! You are an Earth pony stallion with a chestnut coat and brown hair! Oh and what's that? An hourglass? Amazing."

"Well, yours is pretty cool too."

Kami trotted forward a few feet so that she could get used to the fact that she was a pony. She danced around and giggled.

"Oh hello there." Her laughter was interrupted by a mare with a mail bag. In that bag, was a cute little filly.

Kami's eyes lit up. "Oh my gosh! She's so cute!" She turned around to call the Doctor over. "Doctor, isn't she cute?"

The Doctor walked over to the mare and looked at the sleeping filly. "Very! I just love little fillies."

"Me too!" She squeed.

"Well, my name is Muffin! I think you two should think of having a child if you like them so much!"

Kami and The Doctor both grew red. "Oh no. We aren't married." Kami said with her head turned opposite of The Doctor's. "We aren't even dating either!"

"Oh too bad." She flipped her mane. "You two do make a cute couple."

The Doctor looked really uncomfortable for a moment. "Kami. I am going to see what is wrong with the TARDIS. Why don't you talk to muffin while I do?" He galloped off to the TARDIS.

"Can I ask you a question Kami?"

"Sure Muffin!"

"Why do you and The Doctor have the same cutie mark?"

"What?" She planted her flank on the ground then turned around to look. Indeed, there was the same hour glass as on the Doctor's flank! "Well, it's because we both have the same talent!"

Muffin raised her brow. "Then you two must either be partners, or lovers."

"Uh.. partners..."

"Listen..." Muffin began. "I know you like the Doctor."

"So? He obviously doesn't know... or care for that matter.."

Muffin looked at her with thoughtful eyes. "Well, I know the Doctor isn't the average pony. But, like any healthy stallion out there- he also has particular needs. Maybe if you could get The Doctor turned on, maybe then he will notice you as something more than a travelling companion."

Kami's head filled with thoughts, which caused her nose to drip blood. "W-w-wha! Where is this coming from?" She quickly wiped her nose. "Don't be silly. That's really shallow and desperate and I'm not that kind of mare!"

"Have you ever got him to look at your flank? Maybe you should try it!"

Kami grew increasingly uncomfortable and her heart began to race. "What?" She thought for a moment. "Maybe I could try.. B-but nothing to naughty! You know, j-just a little something for him to notice and think I'm pretty or something.."

Muffin smiled. "You know what would be really cute? Socks! I have a pair in my bag with my filly to keep her warm." Muffin used her magic to pull out the socks, and handed them to Kami. They were blue and orange striped.

Kami began to slip them on. "That's a good idea, socks are in style after all! But... why are they so hard to put on?" She suddenly fell backwards and hit her head. "Eep!"

"Go try 'em out. They really worked for me!"

She gulped nervously and stood up- then trotted over to the clearing where the Doctor and the TARDIS was. Kami called his name. He took one look at her and turned away. He froze up in fear. His hearts raced madly.

"Doctor?" She asked as she came up behind him. The Doctor stood wide eyed. "Doctor can you hear me?" He continued to ignore her, so she waved her front hooves in his face. He still didn't respond, so Kami laid her ears flat and galloped away. "I think I broke him.."

Once Kami was far enough away, The Doctor sighed. He then discovered that blood slowly dripped from his nostrils. He quickly wiped his nose clean and got back to work.

Kami hung her head low and almost seemed to cry silently. Muffin tried her best to calm Kami down.

"I take it you're a virgin, so are you just going to wait for the Doctor to come around? Or do you want to do something about it?"

Kami was surprised. "Hey that's none of your business!!"

Muffin grinned mischievously. "Have you ever done anything naughty with him?"

"Of c-c-course not! I r-rr-respect him a-a-aand--"

"If you had a chance, would you have sex with him?"

Kami squealed. "AAA! I'm not ready! I can't-- we haven't even kissed yet!!"

Muffin seemed determined to pressure Kami even more. "Ever tried love magic? Like love potions?"

"I have already fallen under one of those before. It is terrifying and the effects are hell to get rid of."

She looked at Kami with pleading eyes. "But this potion isn't as dangerous as the one you ingested! I promise!"

Kami shook her head. "No. I am not going to do that to him!"

Muffin thought for a moment. "How would you feel if The Doctor was interested in somepony else?"

"Uh.. I don't know! It's his choice!!!"

"But what is he abandons you and gets another companion- and loves her and kicks you out?"

Kami's temper flared. "I am not about to stick around and listen to this crap anymore!" She angrily galloped into Canterlot.

The Doctor suddenly trotted up to Muffin. "Hey, do you know where Kami has gone to? I need her to get something for me. It's important."

"She ran off."

"What!?!?! Why?"

Muffin looked down out of sorrow. "I sorta pressured her to do things that she didn't like."

"Is that what the socks thing was about??"

Muffin hesitated a bit. "Yes.."

The Doctor struck Muffin's cheek with a single hoof. "You've really done it now..." The Doctor ran into Canterlot to search for his lost friend.

Meanwhile, Kami was taking in the sights of Canterlot. The ponies were obviously celebrating something big, because there were decorations everywhere. There were even games to play. It must be some sort of Carnival.

"Step right up, step right up everypony! Face your fears!"

Kami cocked her head then trotted up to the sound of the voice. "Fears, huh? How much is it to try?"

"For unicorns, its free. Would ya like to try? All ya gotta do is find something unnatural in the dream."

Kami thought about it for a moment. "Sure! But I have to tell you that I don't have any fears."


Kami triumphantly walked away from the stand. "Like I told her, I don't have any fears. I can do anything!"

A white- maned cyan pegasis mare flew up to her. "You Kami?"

The flapping of the mare's wings blew Kami's mane in all directions. "Yes, what is it?"

The mare angrily shook Kami's hoof. "I'm White Lightning..."

"Why so mad?"

White Lightning erupted into a wave of rage. "The Doctor is dead because of you!!!"

Kami froze. "He's.... dead?" It killed her to say that word. It was impossible for him to be dead! He was a Time Lord! Nothing could kill him!

"It should have been you!" White Lightning stated out of pure spite.

Kami panicked. "How could he be dead??"

White Lightning sighed. "He was trying to fix the TARDIS when it suddenly exploded. He died almost instantly- he couldn't regenerate. If you would have been there, he would have survived."

Kami's world spun out of focus. "I need to see him!"

The mare rolled her eyes. "He is in Canterlot Hospital. They are going to dispose of his body soon enough, so you better hurry."

Kami concentrated and charged her magic. A spark flew from her horn and she was instantly transported to the Doctor's side. He layed lifeless on the table with the sonic screwdriver gripped tightly to his hooves.

Tears fell down Kami's face and she struggled to speak. "Doctor?" Kami pushed herself to speak to him more. "Please be okay." The Doctor didn't respond- he truly was dead. But, Kami wouldn't believe it yet. "Doctor please talk to me!!"

A few minutes passed, and she continued to try to get him to stir. Kami finally gave it a rest when she was absolutely sure that he wouldn't respond. Kami hugged him and cried into his shoulder. The sonic screwdriver fell to the ground. She reached down to grab it. As soon as she touched it, the sonic screwdriver shocked her. She jerked her hand back and rubbed it.

The sonic screwdriver never shocked her before! It must have been charged with electrical energy, but the TARDIS didn't run off of electricity...

Kami touched it again, but this time she held on tightly to it as she got shocked. The pain was unbearable, but something told her to not let go.

She saw a white flash in her eyes, and she could hear a voice.

"Kami, come on!!! Snap out of it, wake up!!!"

Kami found herself back at the place she could swear she had already left. The Doctor was shaking her shoulders wildly. Kami started to cry, then hugged the Doctor tightly. "Never leave me!!"

The Doctor looked surprised, but didn't dare to ask what this weird behavior was about. "I won't Kami. Never."

"Oh and um... I'm sorry about the socks thing. I don't know what happened...:"

"Now, Kami... You really shouldn't let Muffin talk you into things like that." He placed his forehead to hers. "I love you just the way you are. Nothing will change that.."