-Of Those Without-
by Rachel Rayne
Prelude
Who invented the cutie mark? Is it natural, or something that a higher being, like Princess Celestia, controls without the knowledge of other ponies? I've been wondering these things for a while, and now I, Raynestorm Lullaby, shall share with everypony my thoughts.
As a filly, I would always wonder what my cutie mark would be, but I usually spent my time doing unimportant things. I would waste my time with games while not thinking of my future other than to dream, or to wonder what I would be good at. As time wore on, my blank flank would start to truly get to me. My lack of cutie mark, showing that I had yet to find my special talent, was my greatest shame. I was a failure in my own eyes, as well as the eyes of others.
When I was in college, and still with out a cutie mark, I started to think, 'What is the true purpose of the cutie mark? Is it to show what a pony is good at? Or is it a way to worm out the useless ponies with no talent, and no reason to live?'
I wondered these thoughts for a long while, and used it as motivation to try all I could to find something I was meant to do, so I would not have to suffer life as an outcast with no meaning. I found that to be harder than I thought, as it became apparent that no pony would hire a blank flank like myself . Everypony wanted somepony who they could take a glance at and immediately know what they're good at, not somepony that had to be asked. No, that would take away from precious time that could be spent getting the job done.
I hated it! Everypony said I was useless without even giving me a chance to do anything! I would do everything I could think of doing, yet nothing got me hired. I did things better than ponies with cutie marks, yet THEY were hired instead! Why? Because they had proof of their skills, while all I had was a blank flank. I couldn't get a job, I was out of bits, and I sure as hay wasn't going to sell myself. I was just a simple earth pony with no special talent, and no way of making a living.
After I got evicted for not being able to pay rent, I decided to go live with my parents, seeing as they were still alive. My family wasn't rich, but they weren't exactly in poverty either. One could say they were in the low-middle class. Enough to get by and have a comfortable life. Unfortunately, they were cursed with the same thing everypony else had. All it took was one look at my blank flank for them to close the door in my face. Can you believe it? My own parents forsake me for something I couldn't even control! I hated it! They say when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade, but they don't say what to do when every lemon life throws in your face is rotten and unusable.
I don't recall much else that day, I think I managed to eat, but I'm not sure. The only thing I recalled was the rain. I guess that's why my parents named me Raynestorm, since my life seems to be perpetual gloom. Not sure why it's spelled differently though. Meh, who cares about what those backstabbing plot-heads think. All that matters is that ponies look down on me, and I can't stand it. That's all my life seems to be about anyways, just others looking at me and seeing some piece of trash that was left out on the curb. Something that not even the garbage ponies would touch.
As the time wore on, and I got further away from big cities, I heard of tales saying how kind Princess Celestia is, and how she is always willing to help a pony with nowhere else to turn. I had thought that perhaps I could find sanctuary in Canterlot, and by sanctuary I meant a job assigned to me by the princess so I couldn't be fired for my blank flank and thus actually be able to afford things. Things! Can you imagine being excited just because you can actually by the food you need to survive, and be able to afford a place to live? I felt like some cross mix between a foal, and a young adult fresh to the world of not-college. Do I have to say it didn't go as expected?
The princess said, and I quote, “I'm sorry, Miss Raynestorm, but I can not force anypony to hire you, and I'm not in need of assistance at the moment.” Can you believe it!? Not even to “oh so generous” Princess Celestia would lift a hoof to help me. Then she had the gall to “recommend” some back water town I never heard of to get me out of the hair of working people, and while that's not exactly how she put that's what I got from it. I don't know what I did in a past life to deserve this, but I must've been a real bitch.
Don't worry, I'm almost done rambling. Either way, since I don't have any other choice, I decided to go to the place Celestia told me about. It's not like I have any other ideas, and I guess a small town may go better than a big city like Manehatten. So, here I am, setting off for what will most likely end up as another town I'm to be laughed at in. I just hope I'm wrong.
This will be my last time writing in my diary until I reach this place, so yeah, stuff... Seriously, who the buck has ever even heard of Ponyville?