Sweet Apple Acres - AL 4 - Winter
Twilight Sparkle walked down the hard-packed road to her friend’s apple orchard absorbed in thought. The road itself was empty as far as she could see and she was free to focus all her attention on the enigma that Seeking Song presented her. In only a few short hours, she had been picked up by the circumstances and tossed about like a leaf. First, an unknown mare claiming she had grown her library had shown up, proceeded to break multiple laws of magic and biology, and then to top it off, she’d said something to seriously upset Spike. The last was the most pressing to the analytical mare.
She’d obviously done something to him. Sure, Spike had said that it was his fault, but that didn't change that it was her that had caused whatever melancholy Spike was feeling. Twilight snorted angrily and scuffed a hoof in frustration, But I can’t really blame her. Spike shouldn’t have been asking about something that could even have the potential to upset him so badly.
Twilight rounded a bend in the road that led around a dense copse of trees and finally Applejack’s house and barn came into view. Turned around and started walking back down the road before stopping for a moment to deliberate talking to Applejack so soon after she’d gone to tell her family about Seeking Song. Twilight sighed and turned around once more to walk up the path to Applejack’s home. She really needed to talk to somepony about Spike and Applejack was the best at giving advice about family.
She went through the gate with the farm’s name proudly displayed over the road and started toward the house that sat to the right of the barn. A few steps down the path, the sound of filly voices sounded out from beyond the bend that she had just passed. Their conversation was unintelligible as it filtered through the trees. Twilight paused, unsure what to do. Applejack said she needed to tell Applebloom about Seeking Song.
She deliberated for a moment too long. The three fillies on the path had caught sight of her.
“Hey, Ms. Sparkle!” Applebloom called out. She trotted past the gate and up to the lavender pony who fidgeted nervously, “What are you doing here? You need to talk ta mah sister?”
Twilight nodded hesitantly, “Yes. But it’s not important. I can come back later.” Twilight made to go around the fillies but Scootaloo stopped her.
“You don’t need to go. We’re just here to drop our stuff off so we can go crusading!” Scootaloo’s wings buzzed excitedly. Idly, Twilight Sparkle wondered how the filly could not fly given the speed and force of her wing strokes.
“Uhh...” Twilight hesitated and tried to think of something to say that would give her the excuse to return later. Before she could speak, Applebloom said, “She’s right, Ms. Sparkle. Come on in.”
The fillies passed her and Twilight hung her head, “Alright.”
The fillies spoke excitedly between themselves as they walked up the path to the front door. That is to say, Applebloom and Scootaloo were talking excitedly. Sweetie Belle was quietly following behind them. She occasionally offered a comment when the other two addressed her, but she remained silent otherwise. Something bothered Twilight about her, she couldn’t place it however. Suddenly, she had to shy away from the filly. The silence that she observed was not natural. It was not just that she was not speaking. She made no sound: No hoofsteps, no sound of breathing - nothing. The silence - the sheer impossibility of such silence - scared her in a way she could not explain.
For a moment, the thought centered in her mind and her fear increased until it was all she could do to just follow behind the fillies without balking and galloping away as fast as her hooves could carry her. The fear rose and rose until finally, magic erased the thoughts from her mind. As suddenly as the fear had appeared, it was gone. No trace remained in her mind or body. And she did not remember.
The slight pause in her steps went unnoticed by the three fillies that had, by now, made it to the door. Applebloom reached up and twisted the knob and entered her home. She called out for her family, “Granny Smith! Applejack! Big Mac! Ah’m home. And I brought friends for a bit.”
The group walked through the house and as an afterthought Applebloom also called out, “Ms. Sparkle’s here for Applejack too! Ah told her it’s fine if she came in.”
The group finally made it to the living room in the center of the farmhouse and they saw both Applejack and Granny Smith sitting in the room. To the others in the room, their expressions seemed normal and calm but to Applebloom their tension was clear to see in their posture and bearing. She held off on commenting for a moment and turned to her friends, “Why don’t yah drop off your stuff in my room, girls. I’ll be there in a minute.”
Applebloom turned back to her family as the fillies left and her previously bright dimmed, “What happened? Where’s Big Mac? Is he alright?”
Applejack fidgeted and Applebloom immediately caught her discomfiture, “Oh mah stars! He is isn’t he! He hurt his fool neck in the orchard didn’t he!”
Granny Smith spoke up, “No, child. He’s alright.” Applebloom paused in her nervous outburst and stared at her grandmother’s rare bought of seriousness. Applebloom took a breath, “Then what’s wrong?”
Granny Smith motioned to Twilight, “Ms. Sparkle, not to be rude but this is a family matter. Could you come back later?” Twilight gaped at the mare’s uncharacteristic formality and seriousness.
Applejack stood up, “Nah. Ah’ll talk to her. Come on, Twilight. I know you wouldn't interrupt this unless you had a mighty good reason.” The slightly veiled barb struck home and Twilight looked at her friend guiltily. The two left the room and the now silent octogenarian mare and her grandfoal and walked into the kitchen.
“Alright, Twi. What’s happened now? Did Big Mac blow up at Seeking Song?” Twilight’s initial question immediately morphed into another.
“How do I t- Wait, what? Big Mac? What do you mean blow up at Seeking Song?”
Applejack grimaced, “Uh...” She tried to lie but could not, “Oh... horseapples. Big Mac and Seeking Song are... together. As in married.”
Twilight stared at her friend and waited for more. Applejack glared back at her friend. “Tarnation, Twilight! This isn’t my story to tell. It’s Big Mac’s and it’s a family matter like Granny Smith said. It’s not any ponies business what’s between those two but ours!”
Twilight stepped back from her friend’s yelling and conceded, “Alright. I won’t push. The girls and I decided we’d let you tell us when you’re ready. I’m sorry I tried to pressure just now.”
Applejack blushed and apologized, “Sorry, Twi. Ah didn’t mean to get so angry but... this whole thing... it’s really messin’ with me yah know?” she sighed, “Well, everypony needs to know and you’re here anyway. Yah might as well be here for this too. And you can tell everypony about it if you like. I have a feelin’ that Song will be here to stay.”
Twilight nodded but didn’t mention that Seeking Song had said she was only staying in the treehouse for half a year. That didn’t sound like a pony that was going to settle down for a while.
Applejack sat at the table near the wall, “So why are yah here? If not Big Mac, what happened?” Twilight sat across from her and sighed.
“Spike... he was talking to Seeking Song when we’d left her alone and... something happened. He came out and he was more scared than I’ve ever seen. It was worse than Nightmare Moon. It was... was... worse than Discord. He was terrified!”
During her explanation Twilight had gotten more worked up than she intended and she got up to pace, “He said that I shouldn't blame her for anything. He wanted to go off and be alone but I feel like I’ve failed him. Something Seeking Song said terrified him and I don’t know what and I feel like I failed him somehow and it’s driving me crazy!”
Applejack watched her friend thoughtfully for a moment then spoke slowly, “Twilight, how old were yah when yah hatched Spike?”
Twilight paused in her pacing and mentally counted back the years, “I was... eight? Why?”
Applejack made a vague gesture in the direction of the window, “Well... you’re twenty-two. Ah know that you’ve raised ‘im and protected ‘im but he’s growing up. If you’re twenty-two he’s... what? Thirteen?”
Applejack got up and gave Twilight a hug, “What Ah’m trying to say is, yah can’t protect him forever. It sounds like he just found out one of life’s hard truths and he doesn’t know how to handle it yet.”
Twilight spoke, “But it shouldn’t have happened! At least I should have been the person to gradually teach him whatever it was that happened! He shouldn’t need to be traumatized by whatever it was!”
Applejack pulled Twilight down to a chair and forced her to sit. She thought for a moment, “Think of it this way, Twilight. Whether it should have happened or not doesn’t matter. What matters is what you’re going to do about it. When my parents died, it was Big Mac and Granny Smith that raised me and Applebloom. They couldn’t do anything when Ah finally figured out that my parents were never coming back. It was horrible, Twilight. It still is horrible. But they were there for me. And that was all they could do. So you can’t get stuck on whether what Spike learned should or should not have happened. It’s your job to be there for him now after it already has happened.”
Twilight pondered her words for a long time. While she sat and stared out the window, Applejack went around the kitchen preparing two mugs of heated hard cider. While her hooves took care of the automatic task of finding cups and their beverage, Applejack reflected on her own past and the incredible sense of loss and pain that had come with her parents’ death. It had been the most indescribable feeling she knew, at least until Big Mac had unloaded the next load of bad news, the loss of her big sister - not by blood but by heart and mind. Idly, she realized that she was almost grateful that Applebloom didn’t have memories of their parents. It was a blessing and curse to grow up as she had. She did not have to go through the soul-destroying grief that the rest of the family had gone through but at the same time she was well aware that something was missing from her life. Something she, Big Mac, and Granny Smith could never provide, at least not fully.
Eventually, her task was completed and she carefully lay down the ceramic mugs on the table. The clink of the mugs against the table finally brought Twilight out of her own thoughts of responsibility and action.
“Thank you...” she took a sip from the mug and raised an eyebrow at the alcoholic choice, “for listening. I know you need to talk to Applebloom about Seeking Song and I’m sorry I interrupted that. It’s just... I had a feeling you’d understand. You’re family is so close...”
Applejack nodded, “It’s alright, Twilight. To be honest, you five are almost like family anyway. Just because Ah have family matters to take care of doesn’t mean you need to get scarce.” Twilight nodded and got up to hug Applejack tightly, “You’re a great friend, Applejack. Thank you for that.”
The mares stayed in their position for a moment longer and broke apart, “I should find Spike. I know he said he wanted to be alone but that doesn’t mean that silent company would be appreciated. She picked up her mug and downed the rest of the alcoholic treat and promptly left. Applejack sighed quietly, “At least she’s not going to the library. That would be awkward...”
Ponyville Library - AL 4 - Winter
Nothing astounded Seeking Song more than how easily it was to relax in her stallion’s arms. Nopony but Macintosh had been able to reduce her to such a vulnerable state as she was with him. To the mare who had not rested, indeed not even considered resting until the day before, his arms and his easy acceptance that she would be back in his life was nothing short of a miracle. So it was no surprise that Seeking Song did not want to leave her stallion’s arms.
Thankfully, Big Mac had no intention of letting her go and so they lay on the bed with intermittent periods of silence and conversation. She told him bits and pieces of what had happened to her since their wedding in Canterlot. How she’d ventured to the Griffin Reaches for the Princess in exchange for her help with the Curse:Cordantia. She told him of her invitation to Wyrmhold, the center of culture and the capital for Dragonkind, and her winding journey to Zebrica. She fell silent after speaking of the Zebrican tradition of tattoos and sighed.
Big Mac nuzzled her cheek, “What?”
Seeking Song blushed, “Well. Um. Speaking of tattoos, what if I said that to infiltrate the il-Sirai I had to blend in. And um... get a tattoo?”
Big Mac looked at her oddly, “Well, I don’t think it really matters. How did you get in?”
Seeking Song buried her face in Big Mac’s chest and muttered something.
“Didn’t catch that,” he said. She looked up, “I... sort of... snuckinasaconcubine!” She finished in a rush.
Macintosh’s only reaction was to raise an eyebrow, “Don’t they need to get tattoos...?” He vaguely gestured downward and Seeking Song’s blush deepened.
Big Mac considered for a moment before shrugging, “I would say it doesn’t matter. You did what you needed to do and that’s it. I can understand that. I had to do the same raising Applejack and Applebloom. Sometimes... you just don’t have a choice.”
His tone sounded reflective and Seeking Song felt a horrible pang of regret. Sure, she’s had no choice but missing so much of her family’s lives seemed so wrong. Like betrayal. Like treachery.
“I’m sorry. Really I am. I wish I’d stayed,” she said sadly, “I wish I could have been there for our family. When I heard from Celestia that your parents had died after I’d left I almost came back. I almost gave up.” Her breath hitched and a few tears fell, “And I should have! Better to have given you and Applejack and Applebloom a happier life than what I did! I failed. I didn’t even accomplish what I set out to do. I could have been here. With you. And it wouldn’t have changed anything...”
Despair tainted her voice and Big Mac watched helplessly. She whispered brokenly, “We could have had a family. Like we should have. We almost had it and I ruined our chance...”
“No.” Big Mac said simply, “You can’t take all the blame for that. I should have fought harder. I could have done more to hold on to you or convince you. but it doesn’t matter now.” He slid out from under the covers amidst Seeking Song’s protest and held out a hoof to the mare, “We can try now. We have time don’t we?”
Song froze and Big Mac’s smile slowly faded, “Don’t we?”
Seeking Song seemed to shrink on the bed and she refused to meet his eyes, “No. We don’t.”
Big Mac shuddered at her desolate tone of voice, “How... how long before the Curse:Cordantia-?”
Seeking Song cut him off before he could say the terrible words that would break the rest of her fragile emotional control, “Six months.”
Big Mac slowly sat on the bed and a faraway expression crossed his face. The silence between the two grew and Seeking Song grew more and more nervous with each passing minute. Finally, Seeking Song had to break the silence and spoke fearfully, “Macintosh... say something. Anything.”
He looked at her and she could see in his eyes the same torture she felt each and everyday since she had learned of her curse. He opened his mouth once and closed it. A few moments later a few silent tears fell down his face and he asked, “Have you started writing your memories?”
Instead of answering, Seeking Song sat up to reach the table next to her bed and retrieved her ring. She carefully slid it on her left forehoof before walking over to her bags and pulling out two books. The first, The Middle Winds was battered and the edges frayed from travel and use.
The second was a gray-covered notebook. His control broke at the sight.
It was a while before he would stop crying.