//------------------------------//
// Pinkie and the Lawnmower 
// Story: Pinkie and the Lawnmower 
// by toafan 
//------------------------------//

"Well, what do you think?"

Pinkie Pie stood grinning in the middle of the library.  Slightly behind her and to her left was Lyra, and between them and Twilight sat a squat contraption painted a brilliant red.

"It looks great, I guess," said Twilight, "but... what is it?"

"We invented it!" said Pinkie.  "Well, Lyra came up with the idea, and she had to do a lot of the actual building since there's a lot of fiddly little parts, but I figured out how to make it so it'd work and found all the parts we'd need."

"But what does it do?" persisted Twilight.  "I mean, it's fine-looking and all, but you make it sound like it's supposed to do something."

"Well, you push it across grass or something, and it cuts off the top part," said Lyra.

"...Why would you want that?" said Twilight.

Lyra shrugged.  "I dunno.  It was in one of my dreams, and Pinkie Pie saw a drawing of it and thought we could build it, so here we are.  It was just something to do, really."

"Well," said Twilight, "as long as we've got it, we may as well try to find a use for it."




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"I can't begin to imagine what you think I'm going to do with it," said Rarity, poking at the contraption with a hoof.  "What is it even good for?"

"I don't really know, honestly," said Twilight.  "It was Lyra's idea."  They turned to look at her expectantly.

Lyra finished a slurp from her milkshake.  "Well," she started, "it's kinda like a haircut for a lawn.  You push it across grass, and it takes off the top parts, leaving the rest all the same height."

"Haircut?" asked Rarity.  Lyra pondered this for a second.  "Manecut?" she offered.

"Well, I suppose I can see why one might want that," said Rarity.  "How does it work?"

"C'mon outside, we'll show you," said Lyra, dragging it through the door.

"Now, we already filled it up, you'll have to do that sometimes in the future," said Lyra, as she walked around the other side of the contraption.  "With that out of the way, you push this button a couple of times, and then you grab this handle" -- grabbing a bit of wood attached to a sturdy string going into the top part of the device -- "and you gife it a pull... er, you gife it a pull... heh heh... you gife it a pull..."

"Oh, here, let me try," said Rarity, taking the handle out of Lyra's mouth with her telekinesis.  "After all, I'm the one who's going to have to do it if I'm to get any use out of it."  She gave the cord a tug.

Several tries later, the contraption still sat there, stubbornly refusing to do so much a jiggle when the cord wasn't being actively pulled on.  "Oh dear," said Rarity, not quite managing to keep the strain from showing on her face.  "Twilight, you're the stronger unicorn; perhaps you could try?"

"Sure thing," said Twilight, taking control of the handle.  "Should have this thing doing... whatever it does... in a... jiffy!  Phew, this is harder than it looks."

"I know what you're doing wrong!" interjected Pinkie Pie.

"Oh really?" asked Twilight.  "So you can start it, Pinkie?"

"Oh no, I can't start it," said Pinkie.  "I just know what you're doing wrong, that's all."

"Well," -- Twilight was beginning to get slightly exasperated -- "can you tell us?"  Even Lyra listened in expectantly.

"Well, I could tell you, but I don't think it'd help much," said Pinkie Pie.  "You're not really the right type."

Giving up on that line of inquiry, Rarity turned to the others.  "Well, it's not much use to me if I can't start it.  Maybe Applejack could get it going?"

Twilight nodded.  "That's not a bad idea, Rarity.  Let's go ask her."

"She won't be able to start it either," said Pinkie as she watched the others set off.  "Ooh!  But I know someone who can!"  She bounded off in the other direction to go bird hunting.




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Fluttershy was behind her house admonishing a raccoon for trying to wash a sugar cube when Pinkie Pie found her.  "Hey Fluttershy!" she said.  "Do you know a good place to look for griffons?"

"Oh, um, not really," replied Fluttershy.  "I think they like mountains though.  Why are you looking for griffons?"

"Well, Lyra and me were showing off our new invention," said Pinkie, "and everypony's been trying to get it to start, but then I realized that nopony in town is gonna be able to, so I'm looking for Gilda."

"Gilda?  But... she was rather unkind the last time she was here.  Why would she be able to start it?"

"You'll see," said Pinkie Pie.  "Ooh! but only if you're there when she does.  The others were headed towards Applejack's' when I left."  And she bounded off again.

"Oh- but- um- oh dear," said Fluttershy.  "Now, um, listen, don't take any more sugar while I'm away, okay?" she said to the raccoon, before hurrying off towards Sweet Apple Acres.

The raccoon watched her go with barely a trace of concern, then picked up another sugar cube from a pile next to it and began to scrub it into oblivion in the stream.




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Fluttershy caught up with the others just as Applejack was tiring.  AJ gave one last, great, full-body heave, then spat out the handle.  

"Nope, that won't do," Applejack said.  "If that din't do it, then ah don't think ah can.  Maybe let Rainbow try."

While Rainbow Dash made a big show of stretching out, Fluttershy sidled up next to Twilight.  "Um, Twilight," said Fluttershy, "I don't mean to interrupt, but, um, do you know why Pinkie Pie is looking for Gilda?"

Twilight blinked.  "Gilda?  I haven't a clue.  Now why in Equestria would Pinkie Pie be looking for Gilda?"




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"Why in Equestria are you looking for me, huh?" asked Gilda from the cloud she had escaped to.  "Did you not humiliate me enough when I was in Ponyville or something?"

"Oh no no no no no, nothing like that," said Pinkie Pie.  "Besides, none of those were even targeted at you.  No, they're trying to do something that nopony in Ponyville can do."

Gilda rolled over disinterestedly.  "Nopony, huh?"

"Nope!" said Pinkie Pie.  "Lyra couldn't do it, Rarity couldn't do it, Twilight couldn't do it, I know Fluttershy can't do it -- even Rainbow Dash can't do it!"

Gilda rolled back over and looked at the pink pony below her with more interest than she'd care to admit.  "You're sure about that?  That Rainbow Dash can't do it?"

"Nuh-uh."  Pinkie giggled.  "Despite her bluster and bravado, she can't do it either.  She's not the right type, you know?"

"But you think I can."

"Yup!" said Pinkie Pie.  "In fact, I'm sure you can do it!"

"Alright.  For the chance to show up Dash, I'm in."  Gilda jumped down from her cloud.  "Where to, pinks?"




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Rainbow Dash hurled herself away from the contraption once again.  She stopped short at the limit of the cord, strained for a moment, and then dropped to the ground in defeat.  "I'm beat," she said.  "I don't think it can be done."

Lyra look crestfallen.  "But... Pinkie was so sure it would work... I can't understand why it's not doing anything."  She kicked dejectedly at the boxy top with a rear leg.  "It should shake around and be ready to cut."

"Well, sometimes things just don't work out," said Twilight.  "Maybe this is one of those times."

"Yeah, I guess," sighed Lyra.

From the back of the small crowd that had gathered came a commotion.  Ponies moved hurriedly out of the way, bumping into their neighbors in the process.  Out of the not-yet-fully-formed path through the crowd came Gilda, followed by a happily-trotting Pinkie Pie.

"This is it, then?" asked Gilda.  "The contraption even the great Rainbow Dash can't make work?"

"Yep, that's the one!" said Pinkie.  "It's been giving everypony trouble, but I know you can get it working."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, Pinkie," muttered Rainbow Dash.

"Right.  So... ah, what do I do?" asked Gilda.

"Well," said Pinkie, inspecting the machine carefully.  She gave the button on the side a push, then passed the handle of the pullcord to Gilda.  "Just take this, and give it a yank.  That'll do it."

Gilda looked at the bit of wood in her claw incredulously.  "Alright," she said with a shrug, and pulled the handle out past her shoulder.  Immediately, the machine spat and rumbled to life.  Gilda let go of the handle in surprise and stepped away, and even Rainbow Dash looked up in shock.

"Incredible," said Lyra to Pinkie Pie.  "How did you know Gilda would be able to do it?"

"Oh, that was easy," said Pinkie Pie.  "To get going, the lawnmower just needed a big jerk!"


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