I am He as You are She as You are Me and We are All Rule 63'd

by CaptainSanchez


... And Then This Happened

I am He as You are She as You are Me and We are All Rule 63'd

Chapter 4: ... And Then This Happened

Alright, welcome back. I'm sure you won't ask as many plot-derailing questions this time. Okay, to recap: Spike, Spines, and Pinkie (bless her soul) are at Fluttershy's cottage.

***

Spike approached the door of the tree-building, then knocked six-point-seven-two-three times. This knock signified to Angel Bunny that Spike and Pinkie had arrived to escort Fluttershy to the Library. They had a very complicated system of knocks, alright? BECAUSE ANGEL IS INCREDIBLY PARANOID, THAT'S WHY! Ugh, barely a paragraph in, and I'm already yelling. Oh, well. I'm told that many of you are only paying attention because of me, so... let's just skip the gathering process, eh? No, I'm not trying to keep myself from being a plot element in order to avoid dealing with painful memories! Who told you that? I said no such thing. STOP DERAILING THE STORY!! Okay... happy place... happy place... Alright, I think I'm good. Let's get on with this atrocity. What? Alright, I won't skip the gathering process, but only so I won't have to listen to you guys whine about it.

Angel, before answering the door, wrangled the aptly-named (but who wasn't?) Fluttershy, so that she may be thusly wrangled by the awaiting trio. As 'Shy was brought to the door, Hummingway the hummingbird opened it. Out walked the pink-maned mare to the dragons and, uh, the other pink-maned mare... I guess.

"Um... I think it might be nice to meet somepony just as shy as me... even if he is me, it would still be nice..."

"Fluttershy, we should get Rarity..."

"Oh, I'm sorry for wasting your time, I'll be quiet... I promise."

Oh, that Fluttershy... she's just too cute.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'll try to be less cute... if that's alright with you, I mean."

"Fluttershy, who are you talking to?"

"Oh, um, nopony, I'm sorry for the inconvenience."

Aaanyway, the group then left for the Carousel Boutique. As the dragons walked and the ponies trotted, Spike (and most likely Spines as well) pondered why nopony found this a strange sight. Each dragon looked at their counterpart for some clue as to the answer to this most perplexing conundrum, only to receive a shrug, followed by a sigh. After a few minutes, they arrived at the Boutique, despite the fact that it was on the exact opposite side of town, and Spines knocked upon the door.

"Hello? Girl-Elusive? Dusk and Twilight need you!" implored the infantile dragoness.

The door then opened, and Spines saw... Silver? What's he... wait. Oops, this must be his girl-self.

"Rarity's busy at the moment. She said something about 'finding the perfect ensemble for meeting herself,' so I think she'll be a few... hours."

"SWEETIE BELLE!" came a silk-laden voice from behind Sweetie, (Yes, I'm aware that I compare a lot of things to silk, stop interrupting the story) "I AM NOT THAT INDECISIVE!"

Up looked the quartet at the door to see Rarity, fashionista extrodinaire, with her latest fashion creation, a big hat, upon her head.

"Let us go, everypony!" she said, "This kind of fabulosity simply cannot go to waste!"

Spines then turned to Spike, and whispered:

"Remind me again, why didn't we get her last?"

"I thought you 'couldn't wait' to meet her?"

"Oh, uh... never mind. So, are we getting Applejack next?"

"Sure. We'll probably find Rainbow Dash on the way back."

"OoohOohOoh! Can I be part of this conversation?"

Spike and Spines then ceased movement in an unnecessarily dramatic manner, causing Pinkie to trip over them and taste dirt for the third time that day. You really don't want to know about the other three times she'd tasted dirt. Standing up as hyperactively as she could, Pinkie shook the soil from her mouth.

"Hey! Why'd you stop?"

"Because, we're here, Pinkie."

"Oh. Where's here? Is it a guessing game? I love guessing games! Okay, is it Sugarcube Corner? Why are we at Sugarcube Corner if I'm already here? And why does Sugarcube Corner look like Sweet Apple Acres?"

"Because we're at Sweet Apple Acres, darling," spoke Rarity.

"Oh, that makes much more sense!"

Well, with that, Pinkie began hopping towards AppleJack. You know, that's a good question. How did she know where Applejack was? I mean, Sweet Apple Acres is, well, was huge! Oh, well, I'm sure it--

"Oh, that's an easy one, Capp!"

Pinkie? But how-- oh, never mind. You were saying?

"Well, I knew where Applejack was because I always know exactly where everypony in Ponyville is, in case of friendship emergencies!"

Oh... kay. Anyhoof, Spike, Spines, Fluttershy, and Rarity followed Pinkie to Applejack's location, idly chatting about the events of the previous week. An odd occurrence, since the previous week had been rather uneventful. Unless... of course! They were talking about how unusually boring that week had been. Seriously, there wasn't even a Pinkie Pie Party or a CMC mishap. A rare occurrence indeed. Well, rather a rare lack of occurrence.

Once Pinkie had reached AJ's location, she continued bouncing. The only difference was that, in order to avoid passing AJ, Pinkie bounced around the aforementioned Apple Family member. This (for reasons unbeknownst to Pinkie) upset Applejack.

"Consarn it, Pinkie, Ah've got buckin' to do, so would you mind gettin' out from between me 'n' the trees?"

"No time, AJ!"

"What? No time for apple buckin'? Have you gone all sixes and sevens? This here's mah family's livelihood! Furthermore-- Pinkie, will yah stop draggin' me by the tail?"

Pinkie would not. Rather, she just kept dragging until the whole group came across Rainbow Dash, napping upon a cloud. Pinkie, being Pinkie, was able to convince Fluttershy to push said cloud to the Library. Amazing when you consider that she still had a firm grip on AJ's (now rather frazzled) tail. Anyhoof, they reached the library, and Dusk (knowing Butterscotch well enough to know that Fluttershy wouldn't get Rainbow Dash out of the cloud) levitated a bucket of water over said cloud, and-- you see where this is going, right? Good. When Rainbow Dash was peeled off of the ceiling (yes, they were inside), Dusk and Twilight cast Spell 63, opening the ever-so-mesmerizing blue vortex that acted as a portal betwixt the two universes. Out of the portal came the elegant Elusive, the bouncy Bubble Berry, the radical Rainbow Blitz, the bumbling Butterscotch, and the athletic Applejack. Shut up, it's a gender-neutral name. OF COURSE PONIES HAVE THOSE!

The group formed two lines, with each pony facing their counterpart. LET THE CONVERSIFICATION BEGIN!

"I must say, my dear, I simply adore your hat," said Elusive to Rarity.

"Why thank you... I'm sorry, I don't recall catching your name. I'm Rarity, and you... er, me?"

"Why, I'm Elusive, Miss Rarity."

"So very fine to meet you, Sir Elusive."

Okay, next up, Flutterscotch.

"Um... hi. What's your name?"

"Um... I'm Fluttershy."

"Oh, hi Fluttershy, I'm Butterscotch. It's nice to meet you."

"Oh, um... it's nice to meet you too, Butterscotch."

Dash and Blitz are up next!

"You think you're awesome, huh?" asked Rainbow Dash

"No, I know I am. In fact, I'm the fastest flyer in Equestria!"

"Nuh-uh! I'm the fastest flyer in Equestria!"

"We're both the fastest flyer in Equestria, we're the same pony!"

"Dang, I'm hot as a colt."

"I know, right?"

Okay, we should probably go to Pinkie and Berry now.

"Hi Berry!"

"Hey Pinkie!

"I haven't seen you since that thing with the mirror, throw any good parties lately?"

"Same ones as you! Clockwork's been getting onto me about cavities, though."

"Oooh! Colgate's been doing the same with me!"

"Isn't it great being us?"

"Totally!"

Alright, the pair of Applejacks is next, I guess.

"Howdy, ma'am. Well, ah guess, 'Howdy, me' would be more appropriate, wouldn't it?"

"Ah have absolutely no idea, but what's your name? Ah'm guessin' somethin' like 'Caramel Apple,' how off am ah?"

"Pretty far. Mah name's Applejack."

"But that's mah name!"

"Well, how 'bout that? Haystack, Ah must say, Ah like your stetson."

"Well thankie, sugarcube. It was mah Pa's back when Ah was a little filly."

"I guess yah must've figured it out by now, but mine b'longed to mah Ma."

And that, dear readers, is what happened in this chapter. Next time: The Hooves Family