//------------------------------// // Chapter 10 // Story: A Discordant Tale // by piedol //------------------------------// ADT Chapter 10 Twilight's not a deep sleeper, by any means. I suppose she'd picked that trait up after however many years spent waking up at all odd hours of the night to do Celestia-knows-what kind of research. Whatever the reason for her shallow slumber, I hated it. I didn't even manage to start the mustache before a lavender eye snapped open on the lavender mare and focused on me- er- lavenderly. She stirred. "Zzz- uh, wha~? Joseph? Why're you-?" I hastily dropped the marker to the floor and kicked it beneath her bed before she had a chance to notice anything other than the fact that I was in her room without an invitation. On a side-note; Ponyville would be the perfect place to practice a career in burglary. Not a soul bothers to lock their doors. Ever. I'd just waltzed into the library (Though it is public, so I suppose it's a given that the front door would have been open), up the stairs and through the door to the second floor, and through another that led to the alcove that was Twilight's room, meeting absolutely no resistance along the way. Spike hadn't even been in the main library to see me enter, but I suspected that he was probably busy preparing lunch in the kitchen, since I'd heard what sounded like a little girl humming from within the room, along with the punctuating 'tac-tac' of a knife repeatedly striking a block of wood. Point is that everything was unsecured and unsupervised. On a front-note; Twilight made the transition from 'sleepy pony' to 'confused pony' to 'indignantly shocked pony' all too quickly. She slapped the sleep from her eyes. She didn't tiredly rub it out; She literally slapped herself, once, as if her eyes were a pair of faulty old televisions, and that shit was gone. "Joseph? Why're you in my room?" "Because... You're not in mine?" BRILLIANT RESPONSE, MR. HEFNER! She stared at me, then squinted her eyes as if unsure of what to make of the situation. The moment she began to shake her head to clear whatever hallucination she may have been witnessing, I took my cue, "-and that's my idea for earning some income. Are you interested?" The confusion in her gaze tripled. "What?" "Are you interested? Was my pitch so boring that you dozed off on me? Twilight, I'm hurt!" I held a hand to my chest in faux pain. "Huh? No! I just... Got distracted- Wait! I mean... Could you just repeat what you were saying, please? I might be a lot more tired than I thought." Your skill in bluffing has increased by one point. "Oh, that's alright. As I was saying, I need to find some source of income, but Ponyville has nothing that suits me. I was thinking that maybe I could venture into the Everfree Forest, and maybe gather information and samples and whatnot, and I could get paid for it! I decided that if anyone would find that kind of rare information valuable, it would be you. If not, you'd know who could make use of it. So, what do you think? Want to be my first client?" She frowned. "That sounds highly dangerous and irresponsible." "I won't be cheap." Twilight gave me a dead-eyed stare for several seconds before sighing and dragging herself off the mattress. "There are a lot of things to be discovered in the Everfree Forest," she said slowly, "but—and I'm sure most ponies would agree with me on this—I wouldn't be willing to risk someone else's life for simple curiosity. In fact, paying you to do it just makes the whole thing feel even more guilt-inducing if something goes wrong." I patted her head and gave a knowing smile. "You worry too much. I'll be fine. It's just nature; Sharp, hungry, vicious nature, but nature all the same. It's not like there's any horrible dark secret or monster hidden in there or anything." Because that's not an invitation for the fates to screw you over once again, right? Twilight shook her head. "You can play it off all you like, but facts are facts. It's too risky unless you're prepared." This coming from the young unicorn that had wandered into the Everfree, met with the wrong end of a cockatrice, and nearly ended up as a statue forever. Aside from her, the Cutie Mark Crusaders had also ventured into the forest, as had Fluttershy, and Snips and Snails, and all of the Mane Six as a group on three separate occasions. 'Dangerous' my ass. The world wasn't as happy-go-lucky as I'd expected, but I could hardly imagine facing a serious threat in there if a bunch of pastel-colored ponies could get away with it. "Why not just think of something else?" she asked as she trotted towards the stairs. I followed her, explaining as I went, "Like I said, most of Ponyville's jobs involve performing a bunch of menial tasks, and I can't be bothered to do something that I won't enjoy." "But why something so dangerous?" "It's the danger that appeals to me. Gotta live life on the edge if you want to experience it to its fullest." She paused at the top of the stairway and shot me a smirk before beginning her descent. "You sound just like Rainbow. Did she give you the idea?" "Nope. Haven't seen her since last night. All I did this morning was meet Rarity for some clothes, then I came over here." She eyed me with renewed interest, as if she'd only just noticed my change of colors. "Ooh! Rarity made this? It's certainly different from her usual stuff, but now that you mention it, I can see her style all over it. The flowers were a very nice touch.” I basked in her admiring gaze for as long as it lasted, grinning smugly. "Thanks. You were right to advise me to turn to her for clothing assistance. She's a mare of her name. Now, about the availability of manly, adrenaline-inducing ing jobs around this town..." "Unless you're looking to start a career as a construction worker, I suggest you lower your expectations," she flatly remarked as we reached the first floor of the library. I threw my hands up in the air. "See? There's nothing I'd want to do here! I might as well put my skills to the test and do something useful while at it." "Your skills?" "Well..." I scrambled to come up with something that would sound legitimate. "Ah, let's say... 'fast learner of magical things'? I'm bold, if that's a listable quality." "'Bone-headed' is more like it. Tell me; Why the sudden rush to make money? You've been here barely two days. Why not relax a while?" "Firstly, I hate relaxing. I'm lazy, but I like being lazy while doing something. Don't bother trying to make sense of that, because I can't either. Secondly, I need clothes, among other things that I haven't thought of yet. I brought nothing with me when I came here, so I need to be able to buy stuff for myself. I'm picky about jobs, so I'm making one up. Understand now?" Her jaw dropped and she gave me another deadpan stare. "You... That's so..." She sighed, grimaced, and started over, "You're not going to settle for a regular job like everyone else, are you?" "Nnnope." She gave me a strange(r) look before continuing, "Fine. If you're determined to endanger yourself, at least it's going to benefit Science in one way or another. I still don't agree with the idea, because it's reckless, but I'll help you prepare to take on the forest as soon as I can. In fact, I'll go with you on your first trip to keep an eye on you and make sure you can take care of yourself. If you can handle it alone, I'll send word of your offer to the Princess so that she can relay it to the Canterlot Research Committee. I'm sure they'd leap at the chance to learn more about the forest." I performed an enthused fist-pump. "Sweet! I've got a full day ahead of me, so would you be interested in doing the whole 'prep' thing this afternoon? I want to see the forest for myself as soon as possible." "If that's what you want, but for now, I could do with something to eat. I didn't even have breakfast!" She chuckled and made for the kitchen, from where I could still hear Spike humming to himself as he prepared the food. I stayed back at that point. I'd been an unexpected guest, and so lunch there was not an option. Since I had no bits to spare, I had no choice but to head back to Cashmere's. Celestia help me... *** "That's a stupid idea," said Cashmere between bites of lettuce. I nodded over my bowl of assorted nuts (The kind you want to have in your mouth). "So I've been told, but I'm not changing my mind. I came here to explore, so I might as well get paid for doing it." She shook her head and corrected me, "I never said to change your mind. I wouldn't try to discourage you when I could get something out of it." A pony after my own heart. Literally or figuratively? I can never tell with her... "Let me know when you're going in," she said. "I've got some things I wanted to check out, but never got a chance to because my job keeps me friggin anchored to this town." "I'm leaving for the forest right after this, actually. What do you want me to find?" "Bugs. There's two species in particular that I'd love a chance to research, but they only reside deep in the Everfree. Hold on, I have some pictures for reference." She stepped out of the room and returned a minute later with a large dual-compartment plastic container held in her mouth and two small photographs clutched beneath her wing. She passed them all to me. The first picture was of a brilliant blue beetle that was about the length of a bit. I knew this because a crude drawing one of the small gold coins had been scribbled along the back of the picture to indicate a visual scale. It seemed to lack antennae, but instead had thousands of miniscule hairs peppered about its legs, back and head, all of which were the same bright azure as the rest of its carapace. It would have been pretty, had it not been equipped with tiny but razor sharp twin mandibles that made up more than half of its head length. Just the glint of those natural blades made me nervous of the insect. "This blue beauty," she began, "much like the majority of the Everfree's insect population, has no official scientific name as of yet, since nobody's been able to actually catch one for proper observation. It's a rare specimen, but one well worth the effort of finding. I want to study how it manages to survive in such a hostile environment and succeed as a predator when its delicate-looking sensors are so very exposed. Once I know what it does, I'll submit my findings and name the creature myself!" The next one wasn’t so monochromatic; It had a dizzying array of colors and swirls spread across a flat, disc-like body. No eyes, mouth, or sensory organs were visible. It looked almost like a colorful cutout of something that a child would have drawn, and was more than three times the size of the previous insect. I wouldn't have even been able to tell that it was an insect if Cashmere hadn't presented it as one. "What am I looking at here?" I asked. "I wish I knew. From the mere two recorded reports on this specimen, I've been able to determine that its means of travel is via air currents. It simply floats around, though whether or not it has any control on where it ends up, I cannot say. I don't know what it eats, how it does so, what its role in the ecosystem is, or what those markings are for—though I suspect the answer to that last one is 'camouflage'. All that's certain is that it's alive, and it's a mystery." I pocketed the images. "Alright, I have my first targets. Now, about the matter of payment?" "How much do you want?" she asked boredly. "I'm not sure exactly where these things are found, but I know it won't be easy to get to them. My royal stipend goes largely unspent during the time without guests, so I’ve got a fair bit of savings to pull from." "I've never risked my life for money before. Name a figure." I had little understanding of Equestrian economy, but I was fairly certain that a bit could be equated to about fifty American cents. That would have been my only gauge for whether or not she was ripping me off. "Well, you will be undertaking significant risks while helping me out here, so... How's two hundred bits per unique specimen sound?" I was so quick to shout "SOLD!" that a pistachio got forced up and lodged into my nostril. I coughed it out and weathered the burning of the salt as I repeated my statement with less vigor, but slightly more tears. I wouldn't have many expenses in Ponyville. My housing and food were taken care of, and aside from clothing and the occasional luxury, I'd have nothing to do but save all that loot till I found a use for it. Acting as an explorer of the Everfree would do more than just fix my monetary issues; It'd leave me loaded! I made the right choice. You made the right fucking choice. "That settles it." said Cashmere. "Can I expect you back by this evening, or do you plan on spending a night or two in there?" I swallowed the last of my vegetarian lunch nervously as I considered that prospect. "Sleeping in a place with such a bad reputation? No thanks. I'd do it if I knew what to expect, but for now you can bet on me reaching back here before it gets too dark." "That leaves you with about six hours to do some scouting. The sooner I get my insects, the better, so hop to it! I aint paying you to laze about." "You haven't paid my anything yet!" "Hundred bits bonus for rush delivery." “...” *** ALMOST... THERE... SPRINT TO THE FINISH! One minute and a record-breaking run later, I was collapsing against the library's front door, panting from exertion. My legs felt like rubber and my lungs were oxygen starved, but my prime concern was the the task at hand. For that, Twilight would be a necessity. While I had no shortage of good looks, charm, wit, talent and overall sexiness, she had the facial hair and general know-how of the forest, so her assistance would be required. I raised a hand to knock on the door, then came to my senses and barged in as was customary. I left the collection container at the door, next to a pair of saddlebags that were packed to the brim with bulky content that I couldn't fully make out, but a roll of gauze poking out of one crevice had me suspecting that it was all survival gear which Twilight had deemed necessary. I found both the young unicorn and Spike involved with some form of research. Her unofficial slave was frantically running back and forth between various stacked shelves, and then every so often to Twilight, who was intensely focused on a series of open texts levitated before her. He'd grab a book or two from a discarded pile at her side, she'd mumble some sort of direction for him, and he would take those books back to their respective shelves, returning with two or four more to take their place. I suppose it's beyond redundant to say this now, but I found Twilight and Cashmere to be extremely similar in some ways, even if they their major differences in others. The two ponies loved their studying with a passion, and where one took to her work with enthusiasm and wonder, the other sought to dissect and analyze for the sake of profit, after which she'd likely reward herself with a celebratory drink or two. Similarities aside, though, there's also the ever-important fact that one was easily approachable, and the other would probably do well to wear some sort of proximity sensor so that innocents didn't accidentally end up within biting range. Twilight didn't notice me enter the library, but Spike turned his head when the door clicked shut. He lifted a hand to wave to me, but the heavy texts in his grip wobbled with the shift in support, and he had to return that hand before he could even complete the gesture. "Hey Joseph!" he called instead as he carefully teetered his way towards Twilight, who was still oblivious to my presence. I rushed to assist him, taking the heavier half of the books off the top of his load. "Thanks," he said tiredly, quickening his pace now that he had less weight to worry about. "No problem. What's the village bookworm up to now?" I asked, matching his stride. "Doing some light revision on the Everfree Forest. She mentioned something about you needing to go there, and said she didn't want to risk anything when you're so 'inexperienced and irresponsible,' as she puts it. If you ask me, she needs to quit worrying and take a break. My arms are killing me!" He dropped the books beside Twilight with a mighty thud, and I gently rested my stack atop his. He barely had time to slouch in exhaustion before she spoke up without so much as interrupting her examination of a diagram depicting a manticore's bone structure. "Spike, I need you to bring me back that copy of ‘Hairy Beasts and Where Not To Poke Them’. I'm not finding enough details on where not to poke a manticore in this one." He sighed, but made no complaint as he turned right around and ran back to the bookshelves. I watched him go with some amusement, but remembered my purpose and called for her attention. "Twilight, I'm back," I informed her in the most verbose manner I could imagine. She lifted her head up from the book, blinked once as the disorientation of being jerked out of her textual realm wore off, and looked to me as recognition set in. "Oh, you're back." "That's what I just-" "Just give me a second here. I'm making sure that there's nothing the Everfree can throw at us that we won't be able to handle. I've got a spell that will act as a scent suppressant, one to repel bugs, and a map—courtesy of a friend of mine that lives in the forest—that shows the first square mile or so of the area if you enter from the North-Easternmost point. All I need now is to remember what to look out for. Did you know that the base of a Manticore's tail is extremely sensitive?" She pointed to the miniature representation of said monster in her book. "It says here that it's considered to be a defect in the species, and that it's best not to apply any acute pressure to it, otherwise you could end up with a very grumpy Manticore on your hooves- er- hands." "The more knowledge the better, I suppose. How much more preparation do you think you need? I'd like to head in before the day's over. I don't think I could stand waiting another week for the action to start." "Action? What-" "Never mind that. Can we head out within the hour? You said you wanted to come along to make sure I'd be fine, but I'm not letting you hold me up." Truth be told, I was extremely hesitant to leave without her aid, but I couldn't let her know that. You know what they say about supply and demand... Twilight looked between me and her open book, but before she could decide what to do, Spike came running back with the requested volume, which was as large and weighty as anything he'd been carrying around before it. He dropped it at her feet and breathlessly but proudly announced, "Got it! Man, if I'd know you were going to need it again so soon, I'd have left it on the ground or something instead of putting it all the way back at the top shelf. It wasn't easy, but here ya go!" Twilight turned to me. "You're not going to do anything extreme on your first trip, right?" I answered in the negative, trying my best to keep a straight face. She sighed, but nodded in acceptance, then turned to Spike. "Well, good news! Looks like I won't be needing it after all." His jaw dropped. "What? But-" "I've got just about everything we'll need, I hope, so we're leaving now. Would you mind putting all this back?" Spike spared a dreading glance at the dozen or so encyclopedias and guidebooks stacked atop the table, and two more for the dozens scattered across the floor. "Actually, I-" "Thanks, Spike. Wish me luck!" chirped Twilight, and in a flash she was at the door, saddling herself up with the bags. Spike stared after her, opened his mouth to say something, but instead collapsed into the nearest pile of books and immediately began snoring his troubles away. Poor Spikey. Eh, he's used to it. You think we'll really be okay going in like this? We don't have much in the way of defensive magic or anything, much less offensive. We'll figure something out if we need to. We've got the living purple battery. Besides, don't you have a chunk of Twi's memories? I'm sure you've got something on the Everfree in all that. Animal names, dietary habits, plant descriptions, medical uses of said plants, what's toxic and what's not--all incomplete repositories of information, but still usable. That's all I need then. I'll charge headlong into the underbrush, you make sure I don't screw up. That's been the plan all along, hasn't it? Just try not to die. I happen to like this body. With all the bases covered, I met Twilight at the door and we set off for adventure. *** "Let me get this straight; You're going to the Everfree Forest?" "Yes." "For research." "Mostly money and a sense of adventure." "But you know nothing about it." "It has trees, right?" "... So you know nothing about it, and that's why Twilight's-" "That's why I'm going with him, yes." Rainbow Dash had spotted us heading towards the forest right as she was about to settle down for her early-afternoon, post-lunch-but-pre-mid-afternoon-nap nap. Since she had nothing better to do, she'd decided to trail along and see what we were up to. Having been briefed on our plan, she analyzed the situation and made a sound decision in response. "Sounds fun. I'm going with." "Awesome." Twilight did not concur. "Dash, this is the Everfree Forest we're talking about here. We're not doing this for fun. This is for serious research and the betterment of our understanding of the various functioning ecosystems within-" "We're going to hunt some rare and valuable bugs and hope that we don't die trying," I summarized. "So it's like a treasure hunt?" asked Rainbow, her excitement increased by the passing moment. "Pretty much." "It's not a treasure hunt!" seethed Twilight. "It's a dangerous excursion into the unknown..." she blinked twice, "Which, now that I think about it, does sound pretty awesome... But it's dangerous nonetheless!" "So it's settled!" said Rainbow. "I'm going with you. Don't sweat it, Twi. Nothing will mess with us when Rainbow Dash is around!" She saluted with a confident grin. Twilight groaned in exasperation, but realized that there was no discouraging her daring friend, so she gave in. "Fine, but you have to help carry the supplies." "Easy-peasy." She flew along with with us until we reached the dark and gaping maw of the forest. Then she landed so that Twilight could toss over one of her saddlebags, which Rainbow promptly secured to her chest. All preparations were complete, so without further ado, we boldly set forth into the unknown. The entrance to the forest itself had a dark atmosphere that seemed to sap the life out of the world around it. My two pony companions had no issues with just waltzing onto the misty path that only lasted for a few metres before becoming completely overrun by the surrounding foliage. As for me, I didn't really know just how serious the dangers of Equestria would be in reality, so despite my previous convictions, I hesitated at the entrance, but only briefly. The darkness was foreboding, but I had more than one reason for being there, and would not turn back at the brink of my goal. So I steeled myself, bravely shut my eyes, and stepped into the murky realm of the Everfree Forest. My ankles chilled as the first wisps of low-lying fog curled around them, caressing them, almost as if they wanted me to tread further into the darkened depths. I shuddered involuntarily. Somehow, this place looked less uninviting on the show. Heavens forbid a kid's show fail to project a true sense of abject terror to its audience. The initial hurdle crossed, I suppressed any lingering sense of dread and pressed on after my companions. As Twilight and I had discussed on our way there, our plan was to first meet up with Zecora in what was considered to be the 'tame' Everfree. After some guidance from her regarding the dos and don’ts of our trek, we'd move on to the larger, wilder, more dangerous portion of the forest, which was what the whole tangled growth was almost exclusively known for. From then, we'd go hunting for my targets while also keeping an eye out for any potential threats that I'd have to face solo on future trips. We only had five or so hours left to pull all this off, so I was looking forward to an eventful afternoon. Man, did I ever get more than I bargained for. End of Chapter 10 Author's notes now have their own section after chapters? Aint nobody got time fo' dat. >:I Next few chapters will be shorter, assuming I don't go on a literary rampage and end up ballooning them into something bigger than initially planned (ie, what usually happens). Holidays are a time for inspiration, but not free time. Even so, I'll do my best to keep this schedule running smooth. I am officially out of chapter buffers with this post, so it's time to MANMODE this story and push my production past 1k words a day. For Faith! For Justice! FOR PONIES!