Damn, Rainbow wasn't kiddin', these treats really do fill ya up... and damn they were good. Shoot, they were the best ever, both sweets softly melt in your mouth! I thought as I enjoyed the heavenly cupcake, which was literally melting in my mouth. I downed the slice of cake within two minutes, and savored the cupcake for the next five, the bliss consumed me. It made all of my pain, both internal and external, disappear. I can get used to eatin' food this good, best in Coltcinnati was our chili, which I wonder if one could buy the stuff necessary for it...hmmm I'll need noodles and hot dogs to-
I was, yet again, cut away from my thoughts, "Told ya this stuff is awesome! I eat here at least twice a week, and honestly I'm afraid it's all goin' to my flank.," Rainbow interjected, with happiness, no sarcasm present in her voice.
"Rainbow you're pretty athletic, you're flank is fine...," I had, on instinct, spoke before I thought,"I mean it will be fine! Ya know, because you probably burn those calories after one flight, like you're really in shape...and I'm rambling, sorry bout that...," I went on, my cheeks slowly turning a bright shade of red, which was obviously noticeable.
"*Laughs*, you're not the first one to check me out, it's no big deal, really. I mean I have colt's lined up outside my door, just to beg for a date!," she replied, laughing in between every other word.
Way to show off your charisma, Torque. Real smooth, call Rico Suave, tell him he's no longer the top standard for men...not! I slowly began to slouch in my seat, which further indicated how embarrassed I was. "Di-uh-Duh, I'm sorry for checkin' you out, I mean you are really good looking. Probably the best looking mare I've seen in my life.," I said, further worsening the whole situation, and for a brief second I saw blushes in her cheeks. Way to go, you're just SOOOO smooth. Bet you can just walk into a room and attract all the female attention.
"Umm, hehe, thanks Torque. Like I said, guys check me out all the time, and it's ummm cool that you said that.," something about her told me opposite, the petty laugh indicated a lie, at least to me anyway.
"I'm sorry, I don't think before I spe-" at that point a pair composed of male pegasi were encroaching on us. Worst of all, they were laughing.
"Well well well, if isn't Rainbow-Crash! Oooohhh who's your coltfriend? Does he know how badly you screw up? You tell him about your crazy dreams yet?," the one with orange fur scoffed.
"Heh yeah, Rainbow...um..Crash, yeah Rainbow-Crash *Laughs* umm bro hoof!," the bigger, and obviously more mentally construed of the two spoke, and had found nothing else to end on. Stupid people should be forced to read and recite the dictionary...that or kept on a leash by the ponies whom created them.
By this point Rainbow had gone from red with embarrassment, to red with seething anger. The cyan coat provided no barrier to hide the blood red hatred in her head. "Oh, it's you two, don't you have a job to get too? Oh yeah, no one would hire two idiots for anything."
"Duh, you take that back...umm we have jobs, we're just not at them right now. We get paid four bit's an hour! Umm thats a lot! Probably more than you make Rainbow...Rainbow Crash!," the one with the weight on his upper arm responded, slower than anyone I had ever talked to.
"Pfft, four bits is nothing, I bet you two are still living at home!," Dash blew off his terrible comeback.
"Oh, and I'm betting that this guy is you're coltfriend, oh wait, that's right you're into fillies! Not only are you Rainbow-Crash, but also Rainbow-dyke!," The smarter one spoke this time, pointing out her rainbow colored mane. That's an idiot for you, always resorting to fart and gay insults, rather than thinking...By Luna I'm a hypocrite, might as well practice what I preach. I sat there, fully at attention and seeing her face turning from resentment, to full blown loathsomeness was my queue to interject.
"Hey man, you went too far there. Ain't no need for that kind of hate-speak, and honestly I think that you two either really like Rainbow here, or really want to be her. I don't know much, but she has her life together, she makes money, and is already in a management position. By my view, I'd say she's doin' pretty damn good for herself. Another thing, who cares if she likes girls, it ain't hurtin no one. Ponies will like whoever they like, male or female. Besides that who are you to judge her, the only being that should do the judging is the Creator.," I chose my words wisely, and tried to make them feel ashamed for their actions.
My words had, not surprisingly, confused them beyond belief. "Uhh, why you... if you were from here, then you'd know that this mare isn't even worth your time, much less anyones."
I looked over at Rainbow, who was...was about to say something? I quickly covered her mouth, making sure that she didn't escalate this situation further than it already was. "MMMPHHHHH," was all she could mutter.
"Look if she ain't worth anyones time, then why do you two harass her? Unless, she is worth your time, and you two really want to get close to her. Look I ain't the smartest guy out there, but I can tell you two are a lost cause, and probably didn't pass the fifth grade. Have fun bein' alone the rest of your lives, because that kind of stuff won't get you a mare like her anytime in this life.," I had done it, completely schooled them. There was no way they could recover from that, and thankfully they were smart enough not to.
Instead they only muttered in confusion, "I...er...gah...argh!"
"I suggest y'all leave before you further embarrass yourselves. Goodbye, and it's been a buckin' pleasure to meet you.," I cut in on their hopeless rambling, and they proceeded to leave in fuming anger.
I finally let go of Rainbow Dash, making sure she was calmed down. "You know it wasn't very smart to argue with those guys.," I said looking over with empty eyes.
"I know, I know. Twilight said the same thing, but it's impossible to not notice them. I mean you can feel their stupidity rubbing off on you when they're around!," she replied, practically screaming, "Anyway thanks for what you said. I would've just punched them out, but hay what you did worked too. Look, let's take this to the park. Less people there.," she replied through clenched teeth.
"No problem, really it wasn't anything special. I'm sure anyone would have done that, I mean I just did what was right.," I responded, not sure on why she wanted to go to the park. Wait, this place is dead, dude?....