Luna.
I place my hands on both sides of her face and stare into her eyes as she smiles.
“You’re here...” I say. She nods.
“You were finally asleep enough. I missed you.”
I hug her. I hold her close and feel her warmth. She’s here. I’m still human but at least she’s here. She’s reached me. Her mane tickles my face. I feel like I haven’t seen her in years. How many days have I been gone?
“I missed you too, Luna." I say, burying my face further into her flowing mane, "Luna, what happened?” I ask, letting go of her enough to look her in the face again. She shakes her head.
“I do not know.”
“It's Discord. He has me in a mental hospital here. He’s pretending to be one of the doctors. I think he has an accomplice. There’s another patient who I think might be real. Everyone else is probably a projection of some sort.”
Luna nods as I speak, then looks away to a gorgeous night sky to ponder. She shakes her head before speaking.
“This is so strange. Who would be his accomplice? What reason would they have to help him?”
“I have no idea...how is Equestria?”
“The Elements and I are keeping ponies calm. We assure them you’re coming back soon.”
“How did you know how to find me?”
“Celestia, you know better than I that skin and bones and muscles are not what make up a pony. You don’t change no matter what form you are in. I found you just as easily as if I was looking for you in your alicorn form. It was simply harder to get to you... You never got into a dream state powerful enough to let me enter without it collapsing. Ponykind has never encountered this sort of magic before. We’re searching for a solution in the library—“
“I remember being underwater. Maybe there is a lake that I was pushed through?”
“We’ll look for that—“
She is interrupted when I feel something poke my arm. I swat at it. Nothing is there.
“Why are there bugs here?” I say and feel a lurch inside of me. My brain and stomach protest and I find myself kneeling on the ground.
“Celestia!” I hear before my head falls back.
My eyes are closed. I wearily open them and into the eyes of...wow I can’t remember her name. There is a female in blue who is looking down at me as she rubs my arm. She hands a medical needle to...I’m certain I know him. He caps the needle and sticks it into a small case.
“Temperature?” he asks and the female swipes a rod across my forehead.
“99.6 It’s a little high compared to her normal temperature but she should be all right.” she says while she touches her hand to various parts of my face, “Her skin is slightly damp but that should wear off with the drug.”
“All right. Ashlyn, I’m going to do some tests to see how you’re recovering from the blow to your head. Keep your eyes on the flashlight...”
My eyes follow the beam for a few moments but I have to close them soon. My head feels like it’s splitting open. I want to throw up. The light click off and I let my eyelids slide back open again. My eyes feel like they’ve been lying in sand. My lips are cracked and I’m sure I look like a mess. I’ve definitely overslept. My spine feels like I need to crack it but when I bend it slightly I feel a wound split open in my left shoulder.
“You have to be careful.” the female scolds me.
“What do you remember?” the male asks.
“I was talking to my sister—”
“Kiera? You remember her? Brown hair? Was a little younger than you?”
“My sister’s name is Luna.” I correct him pointedly. He sighs and rubs the space between his eyebrows.
“Ashlyn, your sister’s name is Kiera and—though it is tragic—she passed away ten years ago.”
“Are you going to try to convince me that I’ve been here for years?”
I stiffen as he leans over me. He has to bend his head downward to look at me with an expression that is borderline fierce. I can feel his warm breath as he exhales sharply. Adrenaline sharpens my senses. I can count the colors of brown in his eyes and almost taste the scent of cinnamon in his breath. He takes a slow breath before he speaks to me,
“You have been here for almost a year. Seven months to be exact. Up until a month ago you were making significant progress in recovery. You know the right answers but you either cannot or do not want to remember them now. Your recovery requires patience and trust. Right now this is another setback. If you trust us you will recover.”
“And if I don’t?”
“Then you will never leave here. It won't be safe for you to function in society. In short, you will never be you again.” He straightens up a little but doesn’t break his eye contact, “The truth is, I believe that you will keep running if you don’t accept that you are Ashlyn Field. When this...Celestia persona grows old or has her own troubles you will adopt a new personality. But, no matter what, no matter how many times you ‘decide’ who you are...you will never truly know again...unless you decide to be Ashlyn.” he said and stood up from the bed. I look away from him to my left shoulder.
“I think I’m bleeding.” I say. The female lifts my shirt slightly to check a folded wad of gauze taped to my shoulder. I feel my cheeks smolder with embarrassment. She lifts the gauze, untaping it in the process, and reveals a neat line of five black stitches in my skin.
“You got bitten pretty severely. Be careful of these. You don’t want to pull them out by accident. I’ll get you a new bandage.” she says and leaves with the half-red gauze and the case where the needle rests. I resolutely continue to look at my stitches, like bridges crossing a thin red stream that is swelling now and overflowing its banks to trickle away. A strong hand forces me to look Discord in the face.
“Think about what I’ve said. You can invent any excuse to believe what you want, but you can’t change what you are.”
As soon as he takes his hand from my face I look back towards my shoulder. I nod. I don’t understand why I nod but I do. I guess I feel like I have to. We don’t talk after that. He just sits on the edge of my bed facing away from me until the female returns. She tapes a new pad of gauze to my bleeding stitches after wiping the stitches with alcohol.
“Do you need medication or do you think you can handle it?” the female asks.
“I would appreciate it.” I say, wincing at the alcohol which stings my shoulder and burns my nose.
“Just be careful you don’t get her addicted.” the male says, leaving briskly without looking at me. She leaves too and returns momentarily with a needle on a tray that she carefully injects me with. I feel my eyes flutter closed as I hear her leave.
My side is on fire.
I debate calling for help as I open my eyes and bat at the blankets covering my right side. I would sit up or leave my bed but soon the heat is gone and I hear a crinkle of paper. My heartbeat intensifies as I slide my hand under the covers to retrieve a sealed scroll. I open it and my lips part in a smile as I recognize the writing instantly.
Dear Princess Celestia,
We are trying to figure out a way to rescue you. Right now Luna’s dream connection could be the only thing that can connect our worlds. We will try to gather information that way...
My eyes fall closed before I can finish reading the letter. There are so many colors and they want to rock me to sleep. They leap over me as I sink into them, lying on my back in an undulating hill, unable to follow their antics. I’m exhausted. Red and yellow are talking too loudly. Finally, blue is here with scented lavender to calmly shush me. Am I asleep yet?
I open my eyes when I hear wings flutter. Four deep blue hooves with silver shoes land next to me. I smile. I knew she would come. I stand up, feeling pain in my shoulder, but looking to find no gauze or stitches there. I reach out my hands towards her. She rests her head on my sore shoulder and I close my eyes as I hug her.
“I knew you would be able to make it...” I say.
“Did you miss me, Celestia?” an unwelcomed voice ask as a claw wraps around my back, “I missed you...”
I push back. How did Luna turn into Discord? Why is he in my dream?
“Get off of me!” I feel his laughter shake me as he lets go and I fall backwards. Nothing catches me.
I open my eyes, screaming.