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// 33: of Engines and Licorice 
// Story: One Way 
// by jroddie 
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Chapter 33

I was content with lying there for the rest of my life. After Sebastian’s nightmare, I felt as if all my willingness to move and do things was gone, with a dull sense of existence replacing it. I went over who and what I was while I tried to remember why I had to stand. The dream was so deeply ingrained into her psyche that some of her memories rubbed off on me. I was thinking of myself from Sebastian’s point of view, as if I was her. I could remember things that I have never seen before. A bright red flower with blue stripes down the petals, surrounded by buzzing insects and colorful dragonflies. A single dandelion sticking out of a snowy hill. The feel of icy water on burned flesh. I started to try and say everything I knew to be true, which helped me recover from the horrific nightmare and my lost sense of self.
My name is Edwin Shell. I was human once. I am a pony now. I was engaged to Emily Lauren Banks for three hours and forty-two minutes. We were involved in a fatal train crash, along with our mutual friend James Willcox. I died, and then woke up as a pony. I met three ponies who I know to go as the ‘musketeers’, a botanist named Zecora, a unicorn named Twilight Sparkle, and a pegasus named Fluttershy. I then met the Doctor, who in turn handed me off to the ‘League of Numbered’, whose task it is to protect Equestria from Angelics. I met Colu-
“Get up, Edwin. It’s time to go.” whispered a voice urgently next to my ear. I flicked the voice away with the ear being whispered to, but the source of the voice blew in my ear. I jumped up with a start, skittering away from the unpleasant interruption. I was up against the opposite wall, staring at the Doctor with what I imagined to be an extremely unpleasant look on my face.
“Do you know how unpleasant it is to have somepony blow in your ear?!” I nearly shouted. The Doctor shushed me angrily.
“No, I do not, but we need to leave now, and do it quietly.” He said. Sebastian was still sleeping behind him, her curvaceous form rising and falling with her breaths. I was captivated slightly, and just stared at her for a moment. I could feel my cheeks flush and my ears tingle. Almost before I could enjoy the sensation, the Doctor shoved a string of black licorice in my mouth. He got up close to me and stared at my eyes.
“Chew.” He whispered, and looked behind him like he was doing something wrong. I did as I was told, and immediately felt the blush fall out of my face. The bitter taste of the licorice was overwhelmed by my confusion. The Doctor was about to walk out the door when he did a funny little pivot on his hind leg and turned to face me.
“Sebastian has more than a few tricks up her... Sleeve? Anyways, it would be best to stay near black licorice if you don’t want to get involved in a rather... Complicated scenario.” The Doctor said, parting the curtain sneakily and walking out of the doorway. I was just left there with a sleeping mare that was unconsciously trying to seduce me, a platter full of pastry, and a small bundle of black licorice. I slumped down to sit and decided to grab one of those foxy apple strudels that has been eyeing me since I got in the bar. I licked my lips and watched it float towards my face with magic. I was about to bite into it’s warm and delicious appley center, oozing with the promise of sweet cinnamon and delicate pastry when a white hoof batted it aside, making it crumble against the wall on the opposite side of the room. I stared after my lost delicacy, feeling the sorrow of a strudel gone before it’s time. I turned to look at the murderer, and saw myself face-to-face with a fully awake Sebastian, with her straight black mane waving slightly as it hung down to the floor. Her brilliant green eyes held a strange curiosity in them, and I could feel my ears begin to tingle. Not a second had passed with my tingly ears when Sebastian shoved a piece of black licorice in my mouth. I chewed it, not wanting to understand why ponies were trying to feed me dreadful candy.
“I didn’t wake up today thinking how wonderful it would be to shack up with a Numbered. Carry that.” She said, pointing with a hoof to the nondescript brown paper bag with a few black licorice ropes sticking out. I picked it up with magic and balanced it precariously on my back. I turned back to Sebastian, but all I saw was the swaying curtain of the doorway. I was left slack-jawed for an awkward moment. I stared back at the danish on the opposite side of the wall, almost longingly, when I heard a rustle by the door. I turned to see the Doctor leaning in, with only his neck and head visible. He had a highly impatient look on his face.
“You may be excellent at hide and find, but you move like a rock.” He said, staring at me. I just looked at him,  and he nearly jumped.
“Let’s bloody go, Edwin!” He whispered loudly, and pulled his head out of the doorway. I did not hesitate to chase him out of the door. I was immediately treated to a disturbing sight.
“Doctor, what happened?” I asked, trying to step over an unconscious and bloodied pony. 
“Slim happened.” He said tonelessly. I knelt down to the pony that I just stepped over, and I placed a hoof on his neck. I released raw magic into him, purposeless and idle for his own body to decide what he needed it for. He was a unicorn, so I left him confident that he would not have an averse reaction to the raw magic. I trotted down the now-sullied hallway, strewn with ponies in varying degrees of injury. I stopped and helped the ones that were the most injured, much to the discontent of the Doctor, who insisted that they were all alright and needed no help, that they were going to be fine, and damn it, Edwin, we have to leave. I ignored him and continued down the hall slowly. Once we reached the end of the hall, we found the bar and lounge in shambles. The bar itself was actually cracked in half, with the two separate pieces forming a shallow V with the bartender in the juncture. Many of the tables were overturned and broken, and the piano on the stage was on fire. There was not a single pony in the room other than The Doctor, the bartender, and I.  The tardis itself was standing stoically in the middle of the room, like a marble column standing amongst ancient rubble. The Doctor gestured silently for me to approach the tardis as he himself did so. We took a few steps forward, and an angelic appeared from behind the machine. I tensed, and the Angelic smiled grimly. I pointed to him with a hoof, and felt a stream of magic flow out of that limb. The Angelic immediately shuddered, then seemed to lock up. His shoulders and legs were shuddering and shaking, and his mouth began to foam. He fell over, shaking and harmless, seizing against the tardis. The Doctor looked at me questioningly, and we continued to walk towards the machine. I could see another black hoof step around the tardis, and I raised a hoof to incapacitate it. I immediately felt and saw something fly at me, black and writhing, looping itself around my leg. I tried to shake it off, rubbing it all over the ground. I saw the rest of the Angelic that was behind the tardis walk around the edge of the blue box. I looked up his strangely long leg, past his thinly muscled yet robust chest, up his equally disproportionate neck, and came to rest on a black leather stetson. He looked down at me with his happy red eyes, and his mouth in a goofy grin.
“Hiya Five!” He nearly shouted. I had stopped rolling around on the ground, trying to get the writhing black things off of me. Slim chuckled, noting my predicament.
“Ah reckined that you might like those.” Slim said, gesturing to the twisting jumble of things. I stopped struggling for a moment to look at them. They looked like burning logs, with a cracked and blackened exterior showing red lines under the surface. They were moving in halting motions, looping and spreading up my leg. Slim leaned down to look at me.
“Ah noticed somethin’ differnt bout you, Five.” He said, looking me right in the eyes. I turned away form him, but he pressed a hoof down on my throat.
“Look at me, Five.” He said seriously. I didn’t, and he leaned on my neck, making me cough.
“Ah said look at me.” He ordered through his teeth. I had no choice but to turn back up at him. His horrifyingly red irises looked perversely satisfied.
“Ah noticed somethin’ bout you. You use your hooves quaht a bit. When it comes ta magic, that is. So I had me one a them ideas. What if Ah could keep you from movin’ them little hoovies a yers? I’d have me a Number that cain’t use magic. Least, not for a little bit. And ya know what, Five?” He asked, leaning closer to me. His breath smelled like choking, dry death.
“A little bit is all Ah need.” He said. I could feel the wriggling ropes wind around me, binding my hooves together. It was an odd sensation, not being able to use hooves. I struggled to use my magic without physical interference of my legs, but it was of no use. I had become dependent of them. The best I could do was wiggle and make the ground near my hooves shimmer and glow with my magic. I struggled stiupidly with my regular magic, when suddenly the idea to use the Flow appeared to me. I closed my eyes, intending to enter the Flow. I struggled mentally, trying to enter the mystical river of magical energy. I felt the hoof on my neck thrust down on me, making me gag. I opened my eyes in shock to see Slim standing above me, with his articulate tongue holding what seemed to be a tiny little metal bauble. He leaned closer to me.
“A Puxley-F Engine, if Ah am not wrong.” Slim explained, injecting his thoughts into my mind because of his occupied tongue. It was excruciating to be in such an intimate contact with this vile creature. I could see into his mind, and the twisting, contorted facets of his disturbed thought made me want to vomit just by only being able to know that they exist, let alone having it talk to me and rub against it with my own mind. I writhed and twisted under the hoof of the Angelic, desperately trying to get away from the fractured landscape of his thoughts.
“Alan Puxley was an interestin’ type a folk. He was one a them inventors, a real smart-hooves. He done had a b-e-a-utiful foal one of those days way back when, and he loved ‘er to death. But, as bad luck would have it, she was a Ghost. She lived a hard life, makin’ magic where none should be, floatin’ off into the air when she lost her concentraitin. Dem little fillies at the school done teased her for it, just because she was differnt, and that sure as sugar made her sad. She didn’t like bein’ a Ghost, not a single bit. All she wanted outta life was to be a normal Earth pony jes like her friends. So, her daddy took it on to himself to help his little girly out in the world, so he tried to invent somethin. Years ‘n years he sat and tinkered, only tryin’ to help his lil ‘un. A selfless pony there not ever was, if not ‘im. After nearly a decade of workin’ and workin’, he finally climbed up out a his basement with one a these in his hooves,” Slim injected, brandishing the little bauble with his strong, articulate tongue. “A Puxley Engine.”
“One of these things is worth more’n all the bits in Equestria, if you sell it to the right pony, that is. But, Mr. Puxley was a humble little unicorn, he warn’t interested none for money. All he wanted out of life was to make his daughter happy. And what would you know, he did just that! A course the first one warn’t exactly the best ‘un, but it done worked. He gave it to her, and she wore it like a necklace. Sure, it warn’t the prettiest thing, but to her, it was plum gorgeous. He would make her new ones, ‘n pass ‘em off as birthday presents ‘n the like, and she loved it. He made a bunch of ‘em, and this one was the last one he made before he died. His latest ‘n greatest, as the sayin’ goes.” He injected his thoughts again, reaching down with his tongue to place the tiny little metal oval on my side. My skin immediately began to ripple and flow, moving out of the way of the little machine. My coat actually opened up around it, revealing the muscle and throbbing veins underneath as I watched on in horror. The little drop of metal with its tiny little glowing lights and whizzing gears dropped down through the muscle like it was nothing more than air, and the skin sealed shut like nothing happened. I felt a sudden fatigue rush over me, and I could barely keep my head upright to stare at the perfect patch of skin. I set my head down on the bristly carpeting and panted. I couldn’t think about the Doctor, Luna, Sebastian, Antony, or anything. All I could do was just lie there and pant. Slim took the opportunity to place his tongue back into his mouth, working his jaw as he did so.
“Y’see, Five, Mr. Puxley never did give his daughter the Puxley-F Engine for her own personal use. He discovered somethin’ dangerus, somethin’ not quite right about it. Y’see, It would take away all the energy that ya ever took out of the Stream, or the Creek, or whatever it is yew pale little monsters call it, and put it right back where it came from. He thought that it might be dangerous, so he hid it away in a tiny lil box. So, right about now, I reckin, yer jes’ an Earth pony that has gone the past four or five days with roughly twelve hours of sleep and a few hoof-fulls of confectshinrey.” He said. I could not even talk, couldn’t even move, so I just lied there like a sack of potatoes, waiting for whatever slim would do next. I could faintly feel the blackened vines writhing around my legs, and I could faintly remember that they were a bad thing. I wiggled my hooves a little bit, and Slim laughed.
“That there is jes’ plain adorable, Five. Y’make me laugh.” Slim chuckled as he spoke, leaning down to grab me. The vines around my legs reached up to his hoof, and they enveloped the limb eagerly. He pulled on the entangled leg, hoisting me up into the air as if I were no more than a pile of feathers. He held me above his head, cocked his leg, and hurled me against the opposite wall. I slammed into the wooden walls, nearly breaking through the wall to the opposite side if it weren’t for the stud that I collided with, bruising my shoulder. I fell down to the ground unceremoniously with a loud gasp. My legs were balanced precariously above me, still trapped in the magical vines. I could not think about this for even a second before Slim grabbed me again and hurled me across the once-sophisticated barroom. I collided with the flaming piano on the small stage in a terrible, deafening cacophony of strings. I could feel something that was like a strong blow on my shoulder, and the watery clang of a bell. I clenched my teeth with the pain, trying not to moan. My legs were now pointing towards Slim, and I could see him and his crooked stetson walking towards me. I was afraid. I didn’t want to die. I still had things to do. I couldn’t die. I needed to live. Slim ascended the stage, and placed a hoof on the vines that were keeping me imprisoned. He pulled me closer to him so he could whisper in my ear
“Ah’m gunna enjoy this, Five. You’ve bin a thorn ‘n our side long enough.” He spoke softly, snalking his tongue out to touch the tip of my ear. I shrunk away from his touch, shivering. He snarled and hurled me away from him. I closed my eyes, awating the impact that would elongate my suffering, that would compound upon my tortures, and drag me ever closer to death’s door. I opened my eyes. I could see reality bending around me, straight stone lines curving as if they were only drawn on paper, tables and chairs folding in on themselves as if they were only the imaginings of an abstractionist. I saw linear space bend and curve, noting a haunting familiarity to something I once experienced, but something my exhausted mind could not account for. Space moved itself so that I was once more facing Slim. I was about to collide with him when he reached a hoof back and threw it into my chest. I could feel all of my breath run out of me immediately, and I tried to gulp, but nothing happened. I was immediately flying backwards, looking at Slim smiling after me. I felt sad that I would die here. It was not as if I deserved life as a pony. This world was far too good for people like me. I didn’t really need to live through another life. So many only lived through one. I got two. Lucky me. I could see Slim suddenly get angry, as if something was not going his way. I heard a familiar noise, and I could see Slim reach out with a hoof for me. I fell through the air, away from him, unable to do anything at all. I suddenly landed on something hard. Looked back at Slim, and I could see him flying through the air trying to get me. I could vaguely see two pale white doors close, shutting him out of my sight. I could hear a strong bang against the doors, and I felt slightly relieved. I looked above me to see the round things on the wall of the Tardis. 
“Safe...” I whispered. I closed my eyes and smiled. I enjoyed my happiness for a moment when I felt something clambering over me. I opened my eyes to see the Doctor above me, wearing some kind of shiny metal backpack, with what seemed to be a metal floor buffer attached to it.
“Doctor?” I asked. He did not respond, but produced a shiny syringe. He pulled the cap of it off with his teeth, then jammed the needle straight into my chest. He depressed the plunger, and I immediately felt more alert than before. The Doctor leaned down to my face.
“Adrenaline. I need you awake, Edwin. Can you hear me?!” He nearly shouted. I nodded, suddenly filled with nervous energy. I could feel my hooves shaking a little bit. The Doctor nodded happily, but with a cautious look on his face.
“Good. Can you tell me what Slim did?” He asked slowly, as if I were deaf or elderly. I struggled to think through my sudden burst of energy
“He said... Puxley.” I muttered, still feeling a little bit numb. My head lolled off to the side, looking at an interesting toolbox. The Doctor reached out and slapped my face lightly a few times.
“Edwin, concentrate!” The Doctor said. He looked up at something away from me.
“Marcus! I need you!” The Doctor shouted. I could hear Marcus approaching before I saw him, due to his bulk. Marcus entered my field of vision, looking worried. The Doctor gestured to the vines covering my shaky legs.
“Get rid of these.” The Doctor said, and Marcus’ hooves were immediately surrounded by a green aura. He placed the forehooves on the now docile vines, trying to get rid of them with magic. The Doctor shuffled awkwardly, and I turned to look at him. My right side was facing him, with Marcus working on my hooves. He hoisted the big floor buffer with the opposite hoof. He had a very hesitant look on his face.
“Edwin... This is going to hurt.” He warned, and pressed the floor buffer to my exposed side. It immediately began to whirr and click, and two grasping appendages extended and grasped me with their cold metal lengths. I was extremely worried, and unable to do absolutely anything. My mind was making frightened conclusions. The big machine that the Doctor was using began to beep loudly, in increasing intervals. A shiny metal plunger popped out of the top of it, extending more than it should have. The Doctor hesitated, and pushed down the plunger with his free hoof. I felt an immediate, twising pain in my side, like something grabbed my coat was trying to dry it out like a towel. I clenched my teeth and whimpered, trying not to scream. I could feel the cold, cold metal snake around my lungs and bones and veins, looking for something. It took an excruciating few minutes to find it, and each second of it was torture. I couldn’t stand another minute of the pain. My muscles began to shake from tensing so much in agony. Just when I thought that it would not end, just when I thought that my suffering would be eternal, the freezing invader snaked it’s way out of my body. I cold feel it twist and turn around my insides, making my body shiver. It finally exited my body, and I turned to look at the machine that was my tormentor. There was a small, windowed cylinder on the top of the large plate that grasped me, and suddenly a spurt of blood was splattered over the inside of the windows. I felt horrified, but some morbidly curious part of me made me watch. A faint glowing light appeared, and then a small, bloodspeckled ovoid shape floated out of it. The Doctor pressed a few buttons on the side of the machine, and the arms that were holding me slid and retracted back inside of the machine. He shrugged off his backpack, and he clamped his hooves on the small cylinder. He rotated the capsule with his hooves, and it immediately clicked, and he pulled it off of the main body of the machine. I felt slightly energized when he did this. I couldn’t stand, but I wasn’t shaking anymore. I sniffed, and I could smell something wonderful. I craned my neck to look around the Tardis, and my head was immediately grabbed by two dark blue hooves. I had no time to say anything before my face and muzzle was peppered with kisses.
“I’m never letting you out of my sight again!” Luna said between attacks, and I smiled.
“Luna.” I stated hoarsely, trying to ward away the adoration with my nose, but it only encouraged more. I started to cough a little, and Luna settled down next to me and cradled my head with her forehooves. I could smell the faint scent of oranges getting slightly stronger. I could feel one of my hooves become free, and I reached up with it to touch Luna’s face. She looked down at me with a sad smile on her face. She looked as if she was about to say something, but I placed a hoof over her lips.
“Shh...” I said softly, and she leaned down to my head. She buried her face in my mane and whimpered.
“I’m never leaving you alone again, Ed.” She whispered. I hummed happily. 
“Let’s hope so.” I said. She began to shake, and I could hear her whimpers become a little louder. I snaked my hoof around her neck and began to rub her.
“Shh, Luna... It’s okay...” I said. She started to hyperventilate.
“I almost lost you, Ed.” She said. I continued stroking down her neck, started with her pale blue hair, and going down to between her shoulders.
“I’m fine, Luna...” I said, trying to calm her down.
“I can’t stand it, Ed. I can’t just let you run off and be in danger all of the time. You could die. I... I would never be the same.” She said. I could feel her shake, and I felt terribly that I was the cause. 
“I’ll do better, Luna.” I said. She sniffled, and pulled herself out of my hair, and she shifted her body so we were looking each other in the eyes.
“You will.” She said, and then looked up. 
“Doctor.” She commanded haltingly.
“Princess?” He responded.
“Take us to Him.” She said, placing special emphasis on the word ‘Him’. I could hear the Doctor huff and stomp his hooves.
“But Princess! I was saving him for later! I was going to bring Edwin to him on Ed’s birthday! I thought it would be a nice sur-”
“Doctor. This is not a debate.” She said sternly, with a trace of her earlier tears audible in her words.
“Bloody hell, Ed. It was going to be the best first birthday ever. But not now! No, now we’ll probably have to go to a fancy dinner on one of those stuffy canterlot resturaunts. I do detest them, detest them with a passion. They often serve pears with their hors d’ordurves. I loathe pears, they're just so-” The Doctor continued to hurl his distastes down from his pulpit, denoting how many different ways that pears were disgusting, even going so far as to say that some strange and perverse Deity collected all of the most undesirable traits of a fruit and jammed it all into one jumbled and oftentimes green package. I let him continue in silence, listening to the welcoming watery noise of the Tardis, watching Luna’s pale blue hair bounce slightly. The noise of the Tardis finally came to a halt, and I sighed.
“Once more unto the breach, Mister Shell.” The Doctor said. I immediately grimaced. 
“If there is anything on the other side of that door other than a bushel of peaches, a stack of warm towels, and a large bed, I’m going to garrote you, Doctor.” I said. The Doctor laughed, stepping over me to push the door open. He paused slightly.
“I am confident that I will not die when I open this door because of two things. One, that you cannot garrote something very well without hands. Two, that you will enjoy and treasure what I am about to give so much that you will forget all of your Equuicidal thoughts towards me and simply be in awe.” He said, and leaned over to push the door. It slid out with a nearly silent motion, revealing the most amazing thing that I have ever seen in any of my lives.