//------------------------------// // Hard Time for Love // Story: Damn it, Twilight, I love you! // by Sam Cole //------------------------------// Hard Time for Love “Rarity,” Twilight gingerly mewed as the pair, along with their friends and Shining Armor and Octavia, sat in the dank dungeon. “I love you, but you’re a bad influence.” “What?! You splashed the ingrate. That was all your doings, not mine.” The pair giggled as Rarity remembered the chain of events leading up to now. Forty seven minutes ago: “Ah, you must be this Rarity I’ve heard so much about,” Prince Blueblood called, smiling happily as he swooped in and, rather forcibly, lead Rarity away from the group. “Ah, your highness,” Rarity said without any degree of favor or enthusiasm, “We’ve, ah, we’ve met.” “Really now?” He asked, like he didn’t know. “Yes, at the Gala.” “Ah, yes, I remember you. And good timing, I have been meaning to speak with you.” “Oh?” “I was so very wrong to act a foal that night. How could I make it up to you?” He asked, rather suave. “My word, you’ve changed,” Rarity laughed. “If you’re sincere, then you need not say anything more.” “Oh my lady, I am very sincere. Even more so when I ask you to come back to my chambers for a- private fitting,” He smiled, waving his eyebrows. With a whisper, he leaned in and slipped to the white fashionista, “You are a delicate prize, and I must have thee.” No pony around them had heard, thankfully. The last thing Rarity wanted was to make a scene. “Oh my, oh, no. I’m sorry. I’m actually in a relationship,” Rarity frowned. “I do hope you will understand.” “WHAT?!” Blueblood recoiled, like he was struck. “How dare you!? I will not let you soily my name, and my mane with your lewd talk and offers! I will have no part of it!” You bastard! Quit lying! I hope you- What’s Twilight doing? Twilight walked straight up to the loud mouthed prince, and splashed her drink in his face. Thank Celestia I was having a Vodka Cranberry! “What did you just say about my marefriend?!” “Marefriend?! Good heavens, I was assaulted by a filthy fillyfooler!” Blueblood shrieked. “You all saw that, she assaulted me! Guards, take them away!” “Like hell you will,” Shining called out as two guards remorsefully lead away the pair, making them stop. “Blueblood, calm down. No pony is getting arrested tonight. Let’s just-” “Oh of course, you would stand up for your degenerate sister and her filthy love!” Blueblood cried. His rant would have continued, had Shining Armor not hit the arrogant plot square in the jaw. Shining followed through with another, and watched as blood and a tooth came spilling out of Blueblood’s broken mouth. Rarity had never been one for violence, but right now she could not stop herself from yelling directions to Shining, egging him on. Thank Celestia for Twilight, who had joined Rarity’s fun. “Kick him!” Rarity yelled, smiling. “Pull his mane out!” Twilight screamed with a giggle. “Guards!” A voice rallied as the elite watched in horror, the fight between princes swelling. “Please, stop them at once!” The guards poured in. Rarity didn’t care that her show was ruined, she was enjoying watching the fight. “Take them away!” Blueblood screamed, trying to block his face with his forelegs. Three guards dashed in and tackled Shining, and fought him as he tried to get free to continue the fight. “Girls, we can’t let this happen. They’re takin’ Twi and Rares!” Applejack yelled. “Come on!” “Yay! Distraction time!” Pinkie sang, somehow reaching out of view and producing a large cannon, her ever present party cannon. The gang, minus Fluttershy, all charged into to the fray, and began throwing punches and confetti. Applejack and Rainbow were tackled and detained almost immediately, while Pinkie avoided capture for a bit, till she stopped by the stage to spray a wave of confetti onto the crowd. “You!” One of the band cried, leaping off the stage. “You defiler of music! You ruined my music at the Grand Galloping Gala! You forced me to play The Pony Polka! The Bleeding Pony Polka! I shall not allow you to shame music again!” She tackled the surprised Pinkie Pie, and choked her mercilessly. “Octavia!” One of the band ponies cried, trying to pull her off. The guards though, they were not as kind, as they tore the pair apart, with more tackling. Celestia had recently hired the former defensive line for the Canterlot Hoofball team, the Spurtans. Their form was quite clear, as were the results. So with the seven, Octavia and Shining included now in cuffs, the party trashed, and Rarity’s work forever ruined, they were lead away to the dungeons. “Ummm....” A squeak next to one of the guards caught his attention. “Could I, maybe, possibly, um...” “Speak up ma’am,” The guard ordered, making Fluttershy cower. “Can I go with them? I don’t like to be alone.” The guard should have said no. He should have just walked on. But damn it she was cute. Who could say no to that face? “Will you behave?” “Oh yes sir,” Fluttershy nodded, then began running after her friends. The chamber door groaned as it swung open, as Captain Vigilance of the Guard strode in, wearing a very pained expression. He had come a long ways since moving to Canterlot, finally taking up Shining on the offer to join The Guard, and replacing the stallion when he had to move to the Crystal Empire. But the other pony to follow changed everything. Princess Celestia walked in, and the tension in the room became palpable. “Twilight, you really did it this time,” Celestia sighed, but her lips kept tugging at an ungranted smile. “You assaulted that poor boy with alcohol. Where did you learn such a thing?” “Romance novels,” Twilight smiled. “I’ve been reading them more and more lately.” “Is that where you got that silly idea to test me?” Rarity asked. In all truth, her idea of romance came from the same books, seeing that she had been reading them since she had first learned how. Until tonight, Twilight’s actions had seemed appropriate to her. Had the Princess said nothing about it, Rarity might have never even thought twice about that oddity. “Um...” “I should have known. How about we forget the fiction, my love,” Rarity smiled. “I like that,” Twilight smiled. A cough garnished their attention, as the pair looked to the officer now, who was clearly annoyed with them. “Well, you two are free to go. Enough ponies saw what happened to not support Blueblood’s story,” CPT Vigilance said to two very relieved ponies. “Oh, and Rarity, you ever get my student arrested again, I’ll send you to magic kindergarten. Understood?” Celestia asked with a smile, one that spat venom and fire. “Eeep. Yes, your Highness,” Rarity stammered. “Good,” Celestia smiled. “I’ll talk to you later about why she was having alcohol in the first place.” “I-” Rarity began till Vigilance glared at her, making words fall short. “Miss Applejack, Miss Rainbow. I’m afraid you two are not so lucky.” “Ah figured. But Ah couldn’t let my friends go down alone,” Applejack smiled. “Yeah. I’m not gonna be the one to say she didn’t lift a hoof to help,” Rainbow smiled as well. “You kicked a guard in the nuts,” Applejack shot back. “We have different definitions of help.” “Shut it,” Vigilance yelled, tired of these mares already. The guard Rainbow kicked is an old friend. “You two have community service, in Ponyville.” Applejack cheered and Rainbow groaned. All community service in Ponyville took place at Sweet Apple Acres anyways, so Applejack was getting off easy. “Miss Fluttershy, you’re not actually under arrest. Heck, you’re not even in irons, so you can leave whenever,” Vigilance shrugged. “Though I took the liberty to read the notebook you had on you when they took you in. We need to have a little talk about that later,” Celestia filled in, glancing over the guard’s shoulder. “Miss Pinkie Pie, we’re going to have to confiscate the cannon,” Vigilance continued, checking a list. “Go ahead. I have party cannons stashed all over Equestria in case of party emergency,” Pinkie smiled to everypony’s horror. The fact that she has ballistic capabilities literally everywhere was really off putting to say the least. Taking the chance to carry on while everyone was quiet, “Miss Octavia, you are being charged with assault and battery. Thankfully, your manager posted bail.” “I refuse,” Octavia stammered. “You have no idea what this means. I will have to work for that ingrate Vinyl again! My career cannot survive such atrocities! Please, I beg you good sir, let me stay till I can have the bits wired to me.” “No, get out,” Vigilance barked. “Um, Lance, what about me?” Shining asked. “Oh, that’s my cue,” Celestia smiled. “Prince Shining Armor, You are henceforth summoned to a duel of honor.” “What?” All 8 asked. “You are to appear tomorrow afternoon in the Canterlot Garden, for your duel,” Vigilance groaned. He was really being forced. “Huh?” Shining asked. “Oh, Shining,” Celestia chided, “Blueblood demands that your unprovoked attack was a direct attack on his honor. He has issued a challenge.” “You’re joking,” Shining muttered. “You are being challenged for your rule thusly, of the Crystal Empire,” Vigilance finished, looking like he had sucked on a lemon. “You’re not joking,” Shining finally managed. “Mmmhmm. Shining Armor,” Celestia said as Vigilance stepped away to outprocess the group, “Kick his pompous flank. That boy needs a good lesson.” About twenty minutes later, all the poor ponies were free, as two lovebirds sat around the flower garden, lost in thought. “I can’t believe this,” Twilight finally managed. “That our relationship has been so destructive to so many?” Rarity asked. “Yeah. You lost your job. Twice, actually. Shining and Cadence might lose their seat in the Crystal Empire. Rainbow and Pinkie had... whatever happened that’s driving them apart. Those two will barely talk to each other now.” “Hmm, yeah,” Rarity mused. “We are horrible at this whole dating thing, aren’t we?” “Let’s get away,” Twilight said, looking at the moon. “I always wanted to see Posh. From the top of the Eiffoal tower. You’re fluent in Fancy, right?” “Yes I am. And I would love too as well,” Rarity laughed. “Come on,” Twilight said standing up, and pulling Rarity to her hooves. “Right now.” “Twilight, what has gotten into you?” Rarity laughed. “I’m done. I just cause problems for you and Shining and everypony. But I don’t want to go without you either. I- I need you,” Twilight mumbled. “Please tell me you feel the same way.” “I do, but we can’t just up and leave in the middle of the night. What about Spike?” “You’re right, we’ll bring him too,” Twilight said. “Darling, I love you. I would follow you to Tartarus and back, but we should put a little thought into this. How about we both go to bed, attend Shining’s duel tomorrow, and then we can go to Posh, right after they finish.” “Promise?” “I promise,” Rarity smiled, and kissed Twilight’s forehead. Pulling the lavender mare into a hug, she sighed. “Damn it.” “What?” “I love you Twilight. But you do not make it easy.” “Well that’s your problem,” Twilight laughed, in much better spirits now than before. “Prince Noble Blueblood, art thou ready?” Princess Luna bellowed. Shining had persuaded the Sisters Royal to make the duel a private affair, closed to just friends and family, unlike Blueblood, who had tried to invite the press. Discretion was a much more powerful tool for this battle. “Yes, now quit yelling Aunt Luna,” Blueblood chided. “Prince Shining Armor, art thou?” “Yeah,” Shining sighed. “Kick his flank,” Twilight yelled from the sides, laughing. “Darling, you are being most-” Rarity began. “Rip off his baby maker!” Cadence yelled. “Uncouth,” Rarity sighed. “No pony insults my family!” Cadence bellowed. “I’m family too, Cadence! ” Blueblood shot back hotly. “Gentlecolts, prepare your weapons,” Luna instructed. Shining crouched low, and summoned a strong aura, narrowing it into a thin beam of light purple magic. Blueblood was less subtle, and focused his magic into a giant golden chainsaw, and let it roar into life. “Oh... Buck...” Everypony said looking at the weapon. “B-Begin!” Luna commanded. Shining chuckled and, for a brief second, appeared as a cloud til everypony realized that was just a trail of dust he kicked up as he made for the exit. “What the hay? Get back here!” Blueblood cried, giving chase. The streets of Canterlot, what a wonderful place. The shops proudly displaying their wares, the foals laughing and playing games. The princes, destroying the market and trying to kill each other... Wait a second... “Get back here and fight me!” Blueblood screamed as ponies scattered from his magical assault. “No!” Shining yelled as he ducked the large death machine and skidded into an alleyway. “Be a stallion and accept your fate!!” Blueblood cried, thrashing the magical device from side to side, damaging everything in his path. “Make me!” “I’ll kill you!” Blueblood cried as he and Shining spilled into a new street. “Not if I can help it!” Shining cried back. I protected all of Canterlot! Why am I running from one- Shining’s thought’s were interrupted as the large chainsaw tore through a fruit stand, peppering Shining with pulp. Oh... that’s why. “It will only hurt for a second,” Blueblood cried. “That’s what I’m afraid of!” “Stop being such a coward and let me kill you!” Blueblood demanded. “No, go away!” Shining yelled as he tore into another alley, but luck was a fickle mistress, and she was against him. This was a dead end. Shining turned to see his slowly approaching doom. “Okay, you win. You win Blue, game over. Now calmly put away the giant death machine, and I’ll see to it they take it easy on you for the damage to public property.” “I’m royalty! They all answer to me. Or did you forget you were a Royal guard?” “No pony’s above the law Blue,” Shining snorted. It irritated the Captain turned Prince whenever these royals, or any pony, thought they could act as they saw fit, outside the law. His foalhood was spent longing to be a guard, and he still carried with him the sense of honor and duty that The Guard instilled in him. “You know, I still owe you for that embarrassment you dealt to me last night. No pony shall ever embarrass me again. Not you or that bitch.” “Stay on topic- No, you know what, forget it. Is this about Rarity at the Gala a couple years ago?” Shining asked, stalling. “She was the first, and only mare to ever make me a fool. A feat I do not take lightly. She isn’t even royalty!” “Okay, so why are you gunning for me?” Shining asked. “Because you are the only pony to ever strike me!” Blueblood screamed, stabbing at Shining, who was lucky to dodge. “No pony makes me bleed my own blood!” “You’re nuts!” “And you’re doomed!” Blueblood raised the weapon high over his head for a strike, and Shining saw his opening. Blasting a bubble of magic out at Blueblood, Shining locked the foal in a shield like the one Shining had made to defend Canterlot. But there is a problem with shields. “Really now, Shining?” Blueblood asked as he stepped forward, out of the magic. “Shield spells keep things out, not in.” Shining facehoofed, groaning loudly. “Well, I have one more trick up my sleeve.” “Oh?” Blueblood asked. Shining smiled nervously as he revisited an old tactic, thanks to the Changelings, and hit the arrogant plot with an expanding shield that he was the base of. Had the pair been in the garden where Blueblood could have sidestepped, the plan would have never worked. Nor would it have if Blueblood thought Shining’s magic was a threat at all. It had all been a clever ruse, one that- Oh who the hay am I kidding? This was all luck, pure and simple! Like I had an inkling of a plan! I’m one lucky pony... oh no, Cadence is going to kill me for this... “Shining!” Three ponies cried as they closed in. His wife, sister, and Rarity. His family, and he was very happy to be able to see them now. “Hey girls,” Shining smiled weakly. Cadence rushed him first, kissing him all over and hugging him tight. “Don’t you ever do that again!” “Not a problem,” Shining laughed. “Wow,” Rarity lamented, looking back at the damage. “I hope everypony is okay...” “Oh yes, they are,” A voice from the heavens called out as a ball of sunshine dropped among them, revealing Princess Celestia in it’s wake. “But I am afraid that most of the market district did not fare so well...” “Oh that’s terrible,” Twilight gasped. “So many ponies out of work...” “Well, it would not be too hard to redesign the area, maybe lay it out better, to accommodate more stalls and ease traffic concerns through the area...” Celestia began with a smile. “If only we had a design prone pony with the ability to take on such a daunting task.” Rarity felt the light come on. It was not fashion, but it was a design job in Canterlot, which was what she always wanted. And she would have no fashion orders for a while now... “Your majesty, I would be most honored if you would let me design the new market district.” “Why Rarity, how generous of you,” Celestia smiled. “Of course Blueblood will pay for the reconstruction himself, but that shall be the extent of his involvement.” “What?” Blueblood groaned as he tried to sit up. “I shall do no-” “Nephew,” Celestia smiled. It was a smile Twilight had only seen Rarity pull off before. One that conveyed the conversation earlier was not open for discussion. Blueblood got the message too. “Rarity, this is wonderful! You have a job again!” Twilight giddily sang, hugging her love close. “I’ll need you to start as soon as possible Rarity,” Celestia smiled as they all began to leave the alley. “Oh... Oh shoot...” Rarity said, coming to a halt. “What is it?” Celestia and Twilight asked. “Twilight, our plans, for that spur of the moment trip to Posh,” Rarity informed. “Oh! Rarity, we can go to Posh anytime. How about that as our incentive? A nice relaxing trip just as soon as you finish this job here.” “Twilight, I- I don’t know what to say. You really are the best marefriend ever,” Rarity cried, hugging Twilight and nuzzling her much to the lavender mare’s joy. “D’awww. Oh, by the way, Rarity,” Celestia said, cutting off the feelings of love. “Don’t you ever try to care for my student again without a job. She is a delicate flower, you got it?” “Where does this keep coming from?” Rarity asked. “Why does Rarity have to be the one looking out for me?” Twilight asked hotly, “I can take care of myself.” “Darling, you can’t even put on your own saddle,” Rarity chidded. “Shut up,” Twilight shot back. “And you wrote the Princess about our relationship before your parents,” Rarity continued. “Okay, I get the message,” Twilight groaned playfully. “Stop picking on me.” “Just keeping you humble my love. Besides, you’re cute when you pout.” Fluttershy sat scared and alone in the dark room. She was told it was an office, but this room was dark, and though no pony was in there with her, there was something else. Something unseen. She sat as quiet as possible, not moving a muscle in hopes that this fear would soon end. The door opened, allowing the only light of the day to flood in, along with the one responsible for said light of day. “Hello Fluttershy,” Princess Celestia smiled. “H-Hello P-P-Princess,” Fluttershy managed. “Why are you so scared? It’s just me,” Celestia asked. “I’m sorry your majesty! I’ve been sitting in this dark room for hours with something else in here and I’m scared and-” Fluttershy began rambling, finding strength in her leader. “I’m sorry,” Celestia quickly apologised, knowing Fluttershy well through her letters and Twilight. “Shoot. I am so sorry. Shining ran away from his duel, making it take much longer than expected. I never meant to keep you here so long. Or in the dark.” “Why is this room so dark? I thought I was in your office,” Fluttershy asked. “Philomena is sleeping,” Celestia explained, as she pointed to the source of Fluttershy’s fears. The mare sighed in relief, it was just an animal friend, of course. “So what did you want to talk about your majesty?” Fluttershy asked, fear rising again as she knew this was about her book. The very book she was writing about Twilight and Rarity. “I read your notebook. It was... Familiar,” Celestia smiled. Familiar? “Please understand, I have been searching for a certain author for years now, ever since I first read Fifty Sheds of Grey! I have wanted to meet the author so badly!” Celestia sang, bouncing a bit and smiling like Twilight in a book store. This is so unlike her! I guess this is how she is in private, much less reserved. It makes an odd amount of sense... “Wow, Princess, I had no idea-” “I had a team of guards pouring over everything! I had them trace every lead! I- I’m sorry, I just love your books soooo much,” Celestia smiled, leaned across her desk. “I have a signed copy already, but its in your pen name, and it was mailed to me. So please, would you sign my copy? Pretty please?” “Absolutely your highness. I’d be happy too,” Fluttershy smiled, taking the book and a pen from the very eager deity . “To Princess Celestia, thank you for the love of my works. I hope I can always keep up to your highest expectations. Sincerely, ‘Butter Shine’ Fluttershy.” “Eee, Luna is going to be so jelly! Thank you!” Celestia smiled in her rather uncharacteristic manner. If smiles made a sound, this one would be a squee, without doubt. “It’s nothing, but please don’t tell too many ponies,” Fluttershy smiled. “Of course,” Celestia nodded. “By the way, how did you come up with this new story?” “Oh it was inspired by a friend and her new relationship,” Fluttershy smiled, then deadpanned. Had she said too much? “Really,” Celestia said, though she seemed less warm and happy now. “Who would that be?” “Oh, it’s a couple in Ponyville,” Fluttershy smiled nervously, “Um- Lyra and Bon-Bon!” “Are they teachers?” Celestia asked. “No, Bon-Bon’s a candy maker, and Lyra’s a musician. The college idea was just a writing tool to help the reader relate. Lots of ponies go to higher education after all.” Goddess I hope she buys it! She’s the Princess! She can see through it! I’m in trouble! I’ll be banished. Or thrown in the dungeon again. Or- “Oh that’s just wonderful!” Celestia smiled. “You’re a wonderful author. Now, I hate to say this, but I do have royal duties.” “Of course your highness,” Fluttershy sighed in relief. She happily got up, said a quiet goodbye to the phoenix and the Princess, then trotted out happily, back to meet her friends for the train ride home. Celestia sat in the office a few minutes, filled out this form here or looked over the schedule there. After five minutes, she trotted over to the doors, throwing them open as she yelled. “Hey Lulu! Guess whose autograph I got!” Spike and Sweetie Belle were rather upset. A trip to Canterlot, and all they did was hang out with the Family Star. “I missed out on a fashion show for royalty,” Sweetie Belle groaned. “I missed a hoof fight and a magic duel,” Spike pouted. “Grown ups stink,” The kids said together as Twilight Velvet came trotting in, all smiles. “Who wants cookies?” She sang, happy to play grandma at least. It was all she had till Shining started having kids. Because she and Night carried very little faith in Twilight having any now. “Me! Me! I do!” Both of them sang, all too happy to forget their earlier reservations about adults. Weeks went by, with Rarity working in Canterlot for days at a time, then working from the Library as she researched designs and concepts for the roads. It was hard, long hours, and very little time to spend with Twilight. “Honey, where should we go for dinner tonight?” Twilight called over. “No, I don’t think Pinkie has any,” Rarity mumbled, not even paying attention. “Rarity, I want to get my ears pierced,” Twilight called over, annoyed that she was being ignored. Again. “That sounds lovely,” Rarity absentmindedly answered as she reviewed her design. How did they ever handle all these blasted one way streets? “Rarity, I’m gonna get drunk,” Twilight called over. “That’s nice dear.” “I’m pregnant.” “That sounds good. Shall I cook that tonight?” Rarity asked. “Rarity, you’re not even paying attention!” Twilight finally snapped. “What? I’m not?” Rarity asked. “Honey, put down the plans for one night,” Twilight chided. “I miss you.” “Darling, I can’t. I have so much work, and this is all such a mess. I’ve had to learn zoning laws, building codes, recent design concepts. It’s all very taxing dear.” “I get that, I do. But you’re neglecting your family and friends. And... and me,” Twilight finally managed. “Darling...” Rarity flushed, tears starting to roll down her cheeks. “Oh no, buck-” Twilight began, trying to cut off Rarity before it happened. “I’m a horrible marefriend! Of all the possible things that could have happened, this is The. Worst. Possible. Thing!” Rarity cried, throwing herself into Twilight’s embrace. “Oh, I’m worthless. I’m muck. No, I’m lower than muck! I’m the worst pony everrrr!” “Rarity-” “I don’t deserve a pony like you! I don’t deserve anypony! I deserve to be an old mare, with no special somepony to cuddle with on those cold winter nights! How could anypony ever love a welp such as meeeeee?!” “Okay, you’re okay,” Twilight whispered, stroking Rarity’s mane. “I’m sorry. You’re under so much stress, and then I just do something like that! I’m the worst marefriend ever! You’re just looking out for me!” A voice called out to them, as Spike took a momentary reprieve from his work on the balcony. “You’re both the worst. Kiss, make up, shut up. I’m trying to aim here!” “Oh darling, Spike’s right. I’m so- Wait, aiming?” Rarity asked as it dawned on Twilight as well. “Spike! What’s going-” Twilight began, before a twang cut her off, followed by a splash and a yell from outside, as Spike came careening back inside, a large smile on his face. “You saw nothing!” Spike yelled as he hopped down and ran out the back door. Seconds later, the front door burst open to reveal a soaking wet Sweetie Belle. “Where is he!?” She demanded. “Who?” the mares asked, still in their hug. “Spike just hit me with a water balloon! He’s gonna get it!” “You just missed him,” Rarity said. Sweetie Belle growled, and her horn sparked several green sparks as steam rolled off of her coat. “I’m going to go get my cutie mark for making Dragon skin rugs!” “Don’t kill Spike! He’s useful!” Twilight called after the retreating filly. “We owe him something nice,” Rarity nodded. “He always knows just how to cheer us up.” “Yeah. I’m going to get him so many gems,” Twilight laughed as she pulled Rarity to her hooves. “Come on, I’m hungry.” Rarity was busy these days in Canterlot, but life carried on in Ponyville, as it was prone too. Twilight was happy though, she was spending her time with friends and her nights with Rarity. So when Fluttershy stopped by one afternoon, the student found nothing out of the ordinary. She welcomed all of her friends, even more so the one with a novel in the works that neither Twilight nor Rarity had read yet. Rarity wanted to make it special by reading it together, so Fluttershy was holding it till it was done. “Hey Fluttershy,” Twilight smiled, sliding the last book in her magical grasp away. “So...?” “No Twilight, not till it’s finished,” Fluttershy sighed in a friendly manner. “I need to talk to Rarity, is she around today?” “No, she’s with the Canterlot zoning commissioner today. What’s up?” Twilight asked. “Well, I had a little question about... Sewing. It’s nothing really,” Fluttershy smiled. “Fluttershy, you lie about as well as Applejack.” “Really? I thought I was a little bit better,” Fluttershy smiled. “Really. Now what’s the matter?” Twilight asked, sitting down and patting the cushion next to her. Fluttershy sat, and shook her head as she laughed. “I want to fall in love.” “What? Really?” Twilight smiled. “I’ve been learning so much about love! I’m sure I can help you!” “Twilight, no offence, but you’re still new at this. And I’m not into mares, I like stallions,” Fluttershy smiled, trying not to hurt her friend's feelings. “None taken. But in all honesty, Rarity is too. I think I’m her first actual relationship. She just knows how to flirt.” Twilight explained. “And what difference does it make if you like mares or colts? Love is love.” “Well, you are the smartest mare I know. Okay, why not?” Fluttershy caved. “Yay! We’re going to have so much fun!” Twilight squealed, clapping her hooves. A group of ponies sat around Golden Oaks Library as Twilight collected clipboards from them all, twelve stallions in all. “What’s this all about, Miss Sparkle?” Big Mac asked. “Ah thought y’all needed a hoof?” “I do. Well, Fluttershy does,” Twilight explained. “She wants to start dating, but...” “Say no more,” Big Mac nodded. “Ah understand. So how can we help?” “Yeah,” A pegasus, Thunderlane, asked. “Are we being interviewed to date her?” “Not at the moment, but it is a possibility if you meet the basic criteria,” Twilight smiled. “Right now, I’m taking a survey of the available ponies in town to compare traits and attributes to better analyze the statistical probability of a match based on their desired relationship outcomes and expectations.” Without a word, every pony looked to Spike, who was happily reading a comic book in the corner. “She’s looking at what colts in Ponyville want and if it matches what Fluttershy wants.” “Ooohhhh,” All the colts nodded. “That’s what I said!” Twilight yelled, stomping her hooves. “So...” Thunderlane stalled, “Are we going to date Fluttershy or not?” “Keep asking and the answer is no,” Twilight snorted. “I’m conducting the interviews first, so we’ll be starting alphabetically. Big Mac, you’re first.” “Damn it!” Thunderlane swore under his breath, the last in line by that method. Twilight questioned all of the colts, though Thunderlane was immediately thrown out for being rather ‘impolite.’ As she walked out to the foyer, she was greeted by the four stallions she had asked to stay back, and one mare. The stallions were Big Mac, Great Scott, Steamer the engineer, and Noteworthy. The mare was none other than Rainbow Dash “Rainbow, what are you doing here?” Twilight asked the disgruntled looking mare. “What do you think you’re doing?” Rainbow snapped. “I’m helping Fluttershy...” “No, you’re not. She’s not going to like anypony you hook her up with like this. She’s too shy. She has to meet dates the old way. Dating services never work,” Rainbow snorted. “But I’ve matched her to these colts based on one hundred fifty three different variables,” Twilight explained. “You can’t expect to make a quality match like that Twilight,” Rainbow groaned. “She needs somepony that will look out for her, shelter her, love her. Not just use her for... that. She’s- She’s my best friend,” Rainbow admitted, deflated. “Hmm, gentlecolts?” Twilight asked, “Rainbow has a valid point. Would you be able to do all of that?” “Eeyup,” Big Mac nodded as the others all agreed. “Rainbow, I appreciate what you’re doing,” Twilight said walking over to her. “How about you help me set up the dates, and watch over them? Make sure they treat her nice.” “Yeah, that- that should work,” Rainbow grumbled. Two mares sat in the back of Sugarcube Corner, watching what was probably the most painful first date ever. Big Mac was the last colt to get a date, and it seemed at first he might be the one. Everypony in town thought those two would make a wonderful pair, but neither of the matchmaking mares accounted for how shy they both were. He was fine, till he actually had to talk to Fluttershy. And Fluttershy was... well, Fluttershy. “He’s dying out there!” Rainbow groaned. “Shut up, you’re not helping,” Twilight muttered. “What’s going on?” Pinkie asked, randomly appearing next to Twilight, making her yelp and drawing far too much attention to herself. “Is Fluttershy on a date?” “Yes. And no,” Rainbow said as she thrust her hoof into Pinkie’s mouth. “No singing. This is going horribly.” “Maybe a song will help them get in the lovey dovey mood,” Pinkie smiled, but Rainbow and Twilight’s glare cut her off. “Well I thought it sounded like a good idea,” Pinkie muttered. “No. This is bad. I’m getting Fluttershy out of there,” Rainbow said standing up. “Sit,” Twilight ordered, but Rainbow was already walking away. “Fluttershy,” Rainbow sang as she approached the table, “It’s so good to see you!” “You’ve been here the whole time,” Fluttershy said, her first words since she came in. “We walked here together.” “Really? That’s so crazy! You have the best stories. Come on and tell me another,” Rainbow begged, trying to drag Fluttershy out. “Looks like yer friends are needin ya. Ah’ll be seein ya around, Miss Fluttershy,” Big Mac blushed, all too happy to leave the table and almost gallop out the door. “Oh, look at that, a free table. Come on Fluttershy, you’ve hardly touched your milkshake,” Rainbow said changing directions and setting Fluttershy back on her cushion. “Rainbow, I- What’s going on?” Fluttershy asked. “I just don’t want to see you getting hurt, okay?” Rainbow Dash said, taking Fluttershy’s hoof into her own. “You’re like my best friend. I gotta look out for you.” “Rainbow Dash, please, I can look after myself,” Fluttershy hissed, pulling back her hoof. “I was having a nice time.” Rainbow just stared at her, and let Fluttershy crack herself. “Well, I could have been...” Rainbow shook her head, and snorted. “No, Shy. All colt’s like that just have one thing on their minds! One thing! And you are far, far too nice for that! I’m not gonna let any colt in this town just use you! Never!” “Rainbow-” “You’re a good mare, a great mare, and I couldn’t stand it if you were... you know... taken advantage of,” Rainbow pleaded. “Thank you, Rainbow, but I have this under control. Please?” Fluttershy begged of her friend. “I-Alright, alright,” Rainbow conceded. “I’m sorry.” “It’s alright Rainbow,” Fluttershy smiled. “Now I need to find Big Mac, I owe him an apology.” “What, really? Ugh, Fine,” Rainbow pouted. “Where did he go?” “He... I don’t know actually. He went east...” Fluttershy noticed. “Come on girls,” Twilight sighed as she and Pinkie stepped up. “Let’s go find Fluttershy’s date.” The girls tried several locations to find the elusive colt, but kept striking out. So they all ran to the one pony who should know, Applejack. But when the four mares found her sitting in the cafe on Mane street, they were in for a shock. There sat the hard working farm pony, with a very taxed expression, talking to Lucky Clover. “Oh my gosh! Applejack’s on a date too! And nopony freaking told me!” Pinkie yelled. “Pinkie! First find Big Mac, then get angry at us for forgetting to gossip,” Twilight barked. “I miss Rarity. She always keeps me in the loop,” Pinkie sighed. “Later, Applejack just saw us,” Rainbow said. “And she’s waving us in?” So with no plan, the girls all walked in, ready to ask away for their lost stallion. But the rodeo prone mare was looking for an out. “Girls, you look awfully flustered. How can Ah help ya?” “Having fun AJ?” Rainbow smirked. “I didn’t know you had a date.” “That’s cause Ah don’t need ta get the whole town involved every time Ah have one,” Applejack shot back. “No offence Twilight. So how can Ah help.” “We can’t find Big Mac,” Fluttershy gasped, rushing in. “Please, it’s- it’s important.” “Well Ah can’t just sit by here then. Ah’m sorry Sugarcube, Ah’ll see ya around town,” Applejack weakly smiled to Lucky. “Should- Should I come by tomorrow?” Lucky asked. “Aha, tomorrow ain’t good sug,” Applejack smiled as she grabbed her hat and threw down a few bits for her drink. “Bye now.” The five mares walked briskly out, to Applejack’s unending relief. “Holy horse shoes that was bad. Thanks girls.” “Um...” Twilight began. “We were serious. We can’t find Big-” “Oh, yeah. Did y’all try the Double Shoe? That’s probably where he’s at these days. He took up a second job slinging cider and sarsaparilla bout a week ago.” Applejack offered. “Oh. So... where are you going?” Fluttershy asked. “Ah’m goin home. RD, see ya tomorrow fer our community service,” Applejack nodded. “Buck off,” Rainbow snorted happily. “You're the only pony to ever pull community service at her own home, you know that?” “Yeah, Ah got that,” Applejack smiled. “Don’t think it means I get it easy though.” “Never thought otherwise,” Rainbow called as they headed to the Double Shoe Bar to see the newest barkeep. A bell on the door rang as the gang of four mares walked into the bar. “Howdy, welcome to the-” Big Mac started till he laid eyes on the group, more specifically Fluttershy. He liked her, he really did. But being around her made his head get all cloudy and sluggish. Buck. This makes work hard... Unfortunately, Fluttershy suffered the same fate. “Hey Big Mac,” Twilight smiled. “Fluttershy has something she needs to say to you.” “Oh, no, that’s alright,” Fluttershy blushed. With her light coat and the intensity of her blush, she was as pink as Pinkie. “Oh for the love of- Hey Big Mac?” Rainbow asked, stepping in, “Would you go on a second date with Fluttershy since I screwed up your last one?” “Well, Ah-” Big Mac managed to blush despite his deep red coat, “Girls, Ah’m workin now. Please, buy a drink or somethin. Ah get in trouble fer just chattin.” “Okay then, four ciders,” Twilight smiled as she magically pulled up four cushions for them to sit on. And there they stayed, till Big Mac was able to say he would go on a second date, much to Fluttershy’s joy and embarrassment. So after a little too long in the pub, they all departed, Fluttershy and Twilight staggering back to the library, whilst Pinkie and Rainbow wandered off to unknown locations. “Hey Dashie...” Pinkie managed as she tried to stay awake, laying under the canopy of stars. She was a tad bit drunk, and despite popular belief, it was really a new concept for her. “Yeah Pinks?” “Do you ever think about that night?” Pinkie asked, groaning a bit as a wave of nausea passed over her. “Regularly,” Rainbow giggled. “I never thought I was a fillyfooler till then, but after that...” “I kept telling everypony I was straight afterwards,” Pinkie managed. “But I’ve been lying to my friends for the past 6 weeks...” “Me too. I was just so...” “I know. And it was all so-” “I know. I never meant to hurt you Pinkie,” Rainbow managed, rolling onto her side to look at the pink party machine. “Is that why you stood up for Fluttershy? To protect her?” Pinkie asked in one of her rare glances into anothers very soul. “You know, from what happened to us...” “I’m so sorry. I feel like I used you Pinkie, and that’s- that’s not right,” Rainbow sniveled. “I’m a horrible friend.” “No. You’re an awesome friend Dashie. I’m lucky that my first time with a mare was with a gal like you,” Pinkie muttered, finally looking into Dash’s eyes. “First time?” Rainbow asked with a raised eyebrow. “Play your cards right and it may not be our last,” Pinkie confessed. Ah, the wonders of alcohol. They would have continued their flirting, had they both not passed out soon afterwards. “Darling, I’m home,” Rarity sang as she dragged herself into the library. Lately, both mares had been staying here, as Rarity had converted the boutique into a drafting and design center, and started her own architecture firm. Usually, the two would chat about their days, and gossip and giggle, and drink a little wine till they both fell asleep. But tonight, she was greeted to an odd sight, that of Fluttershy passed out on their couch. “Oops. Wrong darling,” Rarity chuckled. “Is that my beautiful marefriend I hear?” Twilight called, poking her head out of the bedroom nook. She looks so darn cute with those reading glasses. “Why yes it is,” Rarity smiled. “Tell me love, why is Fluttershy passed out on the sofa?” “She had a bit much to drink today,” Twilight frowned, taking off the glasses and heading down. “I thought if she got tipsy, she would become more chatty with Big Mac, but-” “Chatty? With Big Macintosh? Darling, I feel I missed quite the day here in Ponyville,” Rarity laughed. “Why don’t I put the kettle on, and then we get to the juicy details.” So the two love struck unicorns had their fun, as they whiled away, talking about the zoning commissioner with a bad perm, and Fluttershy’s odd request for love. Eventually, the tipsy mare herself woke up, and joined in the conversation, though her first words were along the lines of aspirin and water. “So I have another date?” Fluttershy asked, wincing as she drank more water. “Yeah, whenever you’re ready, Big Mac is too. Are you alright Fluttershy? I’ve never seen you like this before.” Twilight asked. “I’ve never been drunk before,” Fluttershy giggled. Then groaned. “Does it always feel this bad?” “Only when you have too much,” Rarity cooed as she rubbed Fluttershy on the back. “You might want to work on that if you’re going to be dating a bartender.” Fluttershy squeaked at the implication, sitting bolt upright, before collapsing to the table again in the throes of her first ever hangover. Rarity was working in town today, drafting a new traffic circle for the intersection Blueblood had ruined. She was not having the best time of it either. She was focused, even as Sweetie Belle and the other Crusaders wandered in, laughing. Apple Bloom took the chance to peek over Rarity’s shoulder at her work as she passed. “Y’all should look at that building there,” Apple Bloom said through a mouth full of Sweet Apple Acres finest harvest. “Those cross beams ain’t addin no support. Try moving them to these points,” She said, grabbing the pencil and making four hasty adjustments. Rarity just stared at the filly wide eyed. She had been struggling with this for weeks, knowing she wasn’t really an architect, but trying her best. And this filly just walked up, corrected her, and walked off as if it was nothing. “And she can’t figure out her talent,” Rarity laughed when she was alone. She decided it was time to go see a friend about recruiting a helping hoof. She only managed to catch up with Applejack that evening though while she and Twilight were out for their now daily run. Not the state Rarity loved to be seen in, but this was as good a time as any. Besides, Twilight really needed a break. “Oh thank Celestia,” Twilight gasped, resting against a tree. “Good heavens Rarity, ya think ya run ‘er hard enough?” Applejack giggled. She was sitting with Thunderlane, and looked really uncomfortable. Is she on a- No, Applejack? Really? I have been gone too much. “Oh she needs the exercise. But there is something I wanted to ask you. Could I borrow Apple Bloom after school? She came by today, and corrected a major oversight in one of my blueprints, saving me a lot of time and possibly a few ponies in the future,” Rarity explained. “Really? Ya need mah sista’s help?” Applejack asked. “Ah’ve had a feelin that lil Bloom there was a good at design. Y’all think she’s a buildin drawer?” “An architect. Really? Do you not know that word?” Thunderlane asked. “No, Ah just drew a blank fer a minute, alright?” Applejack shot back. “Ya know what what, this was a bad idea. Ah’m sorry TL, it ain’t gonna work between us.” “Oh Applejack,” Rarity gasped, “I’m so sorry, I never meant to ruin your date.” After Thunderlane was out of earshot, Applejack sighed, and smiled. “Ya didn’t ruin a thing sugarcube. Ah’ve been getting asked out daily since ya came out fer Twilight.” “Really?” Twilight gasped, still not fully recovered. “Wow, why’s- Why’s that?” Applejack chuckled, shaking her head. “Well, Rarity was the town eye candy fer as long as Ah can remember. With y’all datin now, them colts started turnin a favorable eye ta me.” “I’m so sorry,” Twilight offered, only to get a large laugh out of the pair of friends. “Sugarcube, there ain’t nothin wrong with a little added attention,” Applejack smiled. “Ah just wish more of ‘em were keepers...” “Hmm, good luck with that darling, I think I found the best one in town,” Rarity smiled, but Twilight stuck out her tongue. “You’re just buttering me up so I forget this was your idea,” Twilight retorted. “Is it working?” Rarity smiled. “Yes. Damn it.” “Well, I’ll make it up to you tonight darling. How does my three cheese tortellini sound for diner?” Rarity asked. Twilight could only salivate at the thought of the delicious meal coming her way, as she eagerly nodded in approval. She’s got me wrapped around her hoof, Twilight thought. And I love it. Rarity called the young dragon over to dictate a letter, her first in quite a while, and one very close to her heart. Dear Princess Celestia, It will never cease to amaze me how amazing my friends truly are. I do not kid thee when I say I have the most wonderful friends ever. I have affected every one of their lives in some of the worst possible ways, and yet still they stand beside me, love me. Even after I have broken their hearts, asked favors I had no right to ask of them, and got us all arrested, they still stand beside me. And I love them all for it. Especially Twilight. She has been my rock, my lighthouse through the myriad of unending torments. The- (Hey Princess, Spike here. Basically, she’s saying Twilight rocks. There, I just saved you 4 long pages by saying that.) In conclusion, I love my friends that stand beside me as I take that daunting step into life. Even more so my sister Sweetie Belle, for her patience, Spike for his wisdom, and Twilight for her love. That is what love and friendship are truly about. Your’s in confidence, Rarity of the family Grace. All in all, though their lives had forever changed, Twilight and Rarity were never happier.