Celestial Mechanics
Chapter 2: The Scientist

I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart
Questions of science; science and progress

-Coldplay, 'The Scientist'

I stared at the reflective letters, puzzled. The language was Latian High Ponese, an all but extinct tongue that I was only familiar with due to its use in certain advanced magical textbooks. That much was clear. What I didn't understand was exactly what the title meant.

Celestial Mechanics? The study of Empress Celestia's, um, mechanics? As in the subfield of physics, or as in ponies who repair machinery? I knew she had a few chariot repairponies on staff at the castle, but I seriously doubted that they needed a book written about them.

Maybe some homoerotic fiction? Sexy working mares getting it on after a hard day in the shop, hot sweat running down their toned flanks as they. . .Mmmm. You know you want it, Twilight.

Was there a different meaning of celestial that I was overlooking? Not that I could think of. The adjective was exclusive to things relating to the Supreme Ruler, and had no other purpose.

Perhaps the answer was inside. My horn glowed brighter, and the leather binding creaked mournfully as I flipped to the first page.

The paper inside was faded to a dark yellow, almost brown. Its condition was despicable: smears of ink covered the ripped margin, matching with the creased pages and stains of what looked like coffee. There were dog ears aplenty – heck, the first page had one on both the top and bottom corners. The only thing keeping the volume from falling apart was the uncommonly fine stitching of the binding.

It was disgusting – a terrible example of the horrors of book abuse. There was singeing along the bottom, actual burn marks! Whoever did this deserved some serious library fines.

Sighing, I redirected my attention to the contents of the page. Underneath the title, a lengthy block of text was typed in a small but ornate blackletter font, two columns on the sheet. A small illustration of the sun and moon appeared at the bottom, largely obscured by a blot of ink.

Picking the first line on the page, I began to read. My Latian was a little rusty, but it didn't take long to sort it out.

<.This text is dedicated to all ponies who dedicate themselves to the high art of astronomia, both amateur and
professional. It is for you that I write, to give you this precious knowledge that I, and so many others have worked so
long to acquire. Without you to read them, these words of mine would be nothing. Only through your understanding do
they gain substance, only through your interpretation do they gain scale, and only through your actions can they hope
to gain greatness. Use them well. -SS >

So it was a textbook, or some other kind of scholarly writing. However, there was one little problem:

What in Tartarus is 'astronomia'? Does it have something to do with Empress Celestia?

I swept my assorted belongings up in a swirl of purple energy. The relaxing sunset reading time could wait until later. Right now, I had a textbook to understand!

Wasting no time, I yanked the doors open, and stuffed everything back into the house.

B-bump-Thump! The beanbag chair bounced to a landing in the far corner of my bedroom, the rest of my belongings following quickly thereafter. I'd put them away later.

Really, I would – as soon as I finished with the book. Now, where was that dragon?

I cast a glance around the library. The large central room was neat and tidy, thanks to the hard work of my friends this morning. The bookshelves were dusted, their contents carefully sorted according to proper classification. All three floors looked good: The main floor, with the heavy wooden reading table in the middle unusually clear, and the kitchen and main bathroom (which I couldn't quite see from my position) freshly washed; the second floor, with our bedroom and the ensuite bathroom both free of decaying food; and the third floor, with the study loft and my meteorological experiments uncommonly devoid of cobwebs.

Spike was nowhere to be seen, but I noticed was a bit dark in here; the setting sun too low to provide sufficient natural lighting. Time to turn on the gas.

I trotted up the narrow staircase to the third floor. The room was only a meter or so across at this point, barely enough space for the winding staircase to fit alongside the large crystal chandelier. A trapdoor, now closed, provided access to the upper study loft and balcony which lay outside of the actual tree trunk.

The flame caught, and bright light flooded the room. Ah, much better. I could turn on the rest of the lights later, but this would more than suffice for now.

I was about to head down when I remembered the Ybox 2π. Of course, Spike was probably cooped up in the study with his new video game console, 'pwning n00bs', or whatever ponies do on those things. He probably couldn't hear me calling him through the headphones.

Honestly, I didn't understand the appeal. Maybe I'm just too old-fashioned; a book pony through and through. Or maybe it's the fact that that I never grew up with them, considering that they've only existed for the last five years or so. Or maybe. . .well, what did it matter? I had more important problems than my dislike of digital recreation on my hooves.

Back up the stairs I went. Clop. Clop. Clop. I snagged the book from my bed on the way, dragging it behind me in a purple coil of magical energy.

Spike sat on the rug in the middle of the study, furiously working the game controller he held in his hands. Large headphones covered his ears, and his attention was fixed on the central bookshelf-cum-TV stand, which contained his precious 26'' HD LCD monitor. It was given to him by Empress Celestia for his birthday, to go along with the console from Princess Luna.

Lucky kid. The Supreme Ruler didn't buy me ANYTHING when I was a filly. To be honest, I was a little bit envious. Not a lot, mind you – just a little.

I hopped up the short section of ladder, alighting on the rug behind him. He didn't respond, evidently engrossed in his game. I spied the case lying on the floor not far away:

A grimy looking mare in armoured barding stared back at me, a sparking energy lance held tightly in her hooves, a large steel helmet covering most of her closely shorn mane. The background was dreary; a fog of smoke spread over a field of shattered rocks. In front of the mare, lay a few long brown feathers, bloody as if ripped from the wounded flesh of a living victim.

I didn't need a degree in arial morphology to guess what species they came from. Poor griffin.

“GAH!” He jumped and whirled around to face me, losing his grip on the controller in the process. He fumbled backwards to to try and save it, but slipped on the game case I had moved only seconds before. Trip.

Thump. He landed flat on his butt, facing me. As soon as he saw who it was who had so rudely interrupted his recreation, his expression of shock quickly changed to one of annoyance. “Ack, Twilight! You startled me!”

I shuffled my hooves apologetically. “Sorry.” He just glared at me with half-lidded eyes, saying nothing as he reached to pause the game.

“It's hard to get your attention when you're wearing those,” I said, gesturing at the enormously padded headphones.

“Yeah, fair enough,” he said as he took them off and set them on the bookshelf. His expression softened. “Just try not to do that again. You almost gave me a heart attack!”

I decided against telling him he also looked cute when annoyed. Though he had grown a lot in height (he was almost as tall as me now) and physique (his naturally powerful dragon musculature was starting to show) in the last couple years, he was still my little 'Spiky-wiky', and I doubted that would change anytime soon.

“Okay, okay; I'm sorry.” I said, holding my hooves over my head in surrender. “I solemnly swear never to insult your awe-inspiring masculinity again.”

Now it was his turn to laugh. “Heh, it's okay.” He moved over to lean on one arm against the shelf. “So, why are you up here? I thought you'd be busy reading.”

“Was it okay?” he asked. “I'm not in to fillyfooler stuff, but Rarity recommended it 'cuz, well, we both know you. . .”

“No! Yes, I mean!” I pulled him closer. “That's not the point! You aren't old enough to read stuff like that! And giving it to me because- because. . .” Because of what? I was honestly confused.

He wiggled away from my grip. “Rarity figures you really need to get laid, but since we all know that's not going to happen, this was the next best thing. . .”

I flushed crimson at the thought of her and my assistant involving herself in my personal affairs (or lack thereof). Why were they even thinking about this? Since when was my Spiky-wiky discussing my love life with his crush? Clearly, a change of subject was required before this conversation got even more awkward. Time to bring out Mechanica Caelestis.

“Nevermind Rarity, this is why I came up here.” My magic surged purple as the massive book soared across the room.

“Whoa, watch it!” Spike said as he ducked out of the way, an arm shielding his face. A fair precaution, but obviously unnecessary given my skill in telekinetic magic.

I grabbed a bookrack from the corner, and dropped the text into position. I could hear the wood creaking and groaning under the weight, even though it was built of thick beams of solid oak. Damn, that was some heavy reading.

He stepped forward and examined the cover, his face scrunched up in concentration. “No. . .I don't think so. . .”

“Never-” He paused, his claw floating a few inches above the book. “How old is this thing?”

“I don't know.” I admitted. “Found it outside on the bedroom balcony when I was reading, under the windowsill. No clue how it got there.”

“Huh.” He looked up towards me. “Well, I'm not touching it. See the cover?”

“Ponies used to do some horrible things, Spike.” I said. “Just. . .try not to think about it. Besides, the dragon probably died of natural causes.”

I bit my lip. It was a lie; not a big one, but a lie nonetheless. It was true that a percentage of dragon products were indeed derived from scavenged corpses, however, dragon hunts were by far the most common source in the past. Thank Celestia that the practice was abolished over two hundred years ago. Dragons were still occasionally killed when they threatened populated areas, but only if there was no other alternative and they refused to yield to reason.

I remember an incident only a few years back when a dragon moved into a cave above Ponyville, producing a massive cloud of smoke that threatened to shroud all of Equestria in darkness for a hundred years. Needless to say, Empress Celestia ordered a meeting of top scholars and military leaders to find a resolution and implement it quickly before serious harm could be done. Various proposals were made; mine was only chosen because I was the Princess's personal student. Interestingly, it was the only one that actually involved talking to the dragon.

It was also the only one that didn't end with the him being reduced to meat pudding.

Luckily for everyone, my plan worked. Thank Celestia for Fluttershy's freaky interspecies social skills – and for the Royal Equestrian Air Command's last minute decision to conserve heat-seeking missiles.

“Whatever you say, Twilight.” Spike's voice pulled me from my dark thoughts. “I bet you'd love it if I handed you a book bound in pony leather.”

“Well. . .” I considered the idea. “I don't think I'd mind, if the pony wasn't killed to make it. Personally, I'd be honoured if my remains were used to enclose a work of fine literature.”

He cracked a half-amused smile. “It figures – first Fluttershy wants to be a tree, and now you want to be a book?” He looked back at the book. “What's it about?”

“. . .And?” He put a hand on his hip. “You read Latian magic books all the time. What's so different about this one?”

I shifted my eyes to avoid his flat stare. Wow, look at that bookshelf. So neat and organized. . . thank you Fluttershy.

“Look, I haven't had time to properly explore it yet – heck, it's only been ten minutes since I found it!” My eyes drifted over the linguistic reference section. “Hey, have you seen the Latian dictionary?”

“Yes, it should. . .” I looked up one shelf, towards the scientific and technical section. “Where did it- Aha!” The aged tome stuck out sorely amongst the far brighter and newer scientific references, which were mostly published in the fifteen years that had elapsed since the Technical Revolution. I guessed Fluttershy put it up there by mistake.

“Astronomia.” I answered, running my hoof down the broad pages. “Astronomia. . .astronomia. . .” Huh? In the spot where the word's meaning should have been elucidated, there was nothing, not even a cross-reference!

Aargh! This was supposed to be an unabridged, complete dictionary – so where was this word? Frustrated, I flipped to “C”. Maybe there would be more information on celestial, some obscure definition that would speed my understanding.

There it was. I began to read – “#1. . .Pertaining to or belonging to the Supreme Ruler, Empress Celestia. . .” Nope, already know that. What about #2? No entry.

Hmm, Spike was saying something. I heaved the dictionary closed, and redirected my attention to listen. “-omia? Like, astronomy?”

“Seriously, I thought you'd know something like that,” he said. “I read about it in one of your old law books while I was looking up regulations on necromancy for Luna's Frankenpony project. It's an ancient form of evil sorcery that was banned over a thousand years ago by Celestia. It said that all written knowledge of the subject was destroyed in the Great Library Fires of 7 AB.” He poked a thumb at the book. “I guess one book survived.”

I paled. “You- You're saying that somepony abandoned an illegal book of dark magic on my balcony? A book that is over a thousand years old and shouldn't even exist?”

Man, this was getting weirder and weirder. If the book was indeed illegal, I should turn it in to the Empress immediately. On the other hoof, I couldn't shake the feeling sompony had gone through a lot of trouble in order to deliver it to me. The least I could do was to give it a quick read. Surely no harm could come from that?

Haven't you heard of a cursed book? Well, okay. Maybe reading it wasn't the best idea – at least, not until I had a better idea of what was inside. Perhaps my questions could be answered without actually opening it again? Reading it might risk exposure to dark magic, but researching it was undoubtably safe.

“I need to see this law book. NOW.” I picked up Mechanica Caelestis. “Spike, file this in the 'Restricted' – nah, the 'Illegal' section.”

“Uh, Twilight,” he said, leaning up against the bookshelf, “We don't have an 'Illegal' section.”

“Then make one! We'll worry about proper cataloging later.” I struck a dramatic pose. “Right now, we have research to do!”

The soft ticking of the clock echoed through the otherwise silent library. The hour was late; long past curfew. No noise entered from the street.

A small mountain of books lay heaped on the central reading table, spilling onto the floor that had been so tidy mere hours before. Scrolls and broken quills littered the places not covered in books, and bits and pieces of half-eaten Apple cookies rested atop them. A young dragon slept silently under the table, curled in a couple of blankets generally designated for daytime reading comfort.

A little closer to the wall was another clump of blankets and pillows. Here, however, the sole occupant was awake. Though her purple tail dangled limply from the warm nest, her head rose resolute above the fabric and paper, a last bastion of conscious resistance against the overwhelming desire for sleep.

I blinked tiredly as I leafed through the text – yet another historical compilation. I inclined my head upward to look at the clock. 2:37. So late already. Sigh.

My research had yielded some answers, but far too many questions remained unresolved. I now knew that 'astronomia' was the Latian word for the banned subject of astromomy, and that celestial referred not only to the Empress, but also to entities of the sky such as the sun and moon. It made sense, I supposed. The Empress controlled the sky, so it was only fitting that it would share adjectives with her Holiness.

What I didn't know, however, was far more important. No matter how many arcane books I combed through, I could not find a single description of astronomy actually was. Some of the older ones made mention of the subject, though only in the briefest of whispers, hidden deep in dry paragraphs amongst horrors unspeakable. It was taboo in a way I had never seen before; even forbidden dark magic like necromancy and wards of torture was occasionally discussed, despite the illegality of actually casting the spells. If one dug deep enough, whole books on these evil arts could be found.

Normally, they were difficult to find, but as Celestia's personal student I had easy access to such restricted material. If I so desired, I could be casting magic capable of brutally murdering thousands. All it would take was a visit to the Canterlot Archives – a few forms filled out here, a few questions asked there – and the darkest of spellbooks could be mine.

But this...nothing. All I had was Mechanica Caelestis, and I was more reluctant to delve into its pages than ever before. From the title I could surmise that it conveyed dark spells to manipulate or control the objects of the sky, but there was no way to know without reading it for myself.

What to do about it? I had no idea at the moment. It was hard enough keeping my eyes focussed, let alone thinking.

Tick. The clock continued to tap out the seconds in metronomic fashion. Why was I still awake?

Nightmare Moon came to mind. The stories of how Luna's evil alter-ego had stopped the motion of the sun and moon to bring eternal night to the land of Equestria fit uncannily well with the time when astronomy was banned. Details of what exactly happened during those dark days were notoriously few and far between. All I knew was:

1). Princess Luna turned evil, or became possessed to become Nightmare Moon. How, I did not know. The stories said that it was because of her jealousy of Princess Celestia and her resentment of ponies for ignoring her precious night, but somehow this justification felt...incomplete. Luna has been the very essence of cold logic for as long as I have known her. Imagining that she could be driven to madness by such a trivial motivation as jealousy was difficult.

2). Nightmare Moon and Celestia battled, and the sun princess triumphed. With the aid of the Elements of Harmony, she was able to strip the Nightmare from her sister, restoring her to the Princess Luna we all know and respect. I once read that Celestia was nearly forced to banish Nightmare Moon from Equestria instead of curing her. The idea was ridiculous. Where in the world was there a place she could not simply escape with a quick teleportation spell?

3). Celestia crowned herself as the Supreme Ruler of Equestria. After the betrayal of that first Nightmare Night, there was no way they could continue to share power as equals. Luna would remain as the Princess of the Night, but Celestia would take the throne alone as the primary ruler of Equestria. And so it has remained to this day.

It wasn't much to work with. If it was through the techniques of astronomy that Nightmare Moon had overruled the power of Celestia herself, I could understand why it would be so illegal to mention. I wished I knew more about the events of those fateful days, but books held little more than repeated rumours of those days long past. The best way to find out would be to ask the Goddesses themselves, but attempting to bring up the subject with either Alicorn was...unwise.

I shuddered as I recalled that awful night in the Palace dungeon, all alone in the dark and cold. It wasn't the first (or the last) time Celestia punished my foalish insolence with “Dungeon Time,” but it was the only time that she left me overnight in the dank cell.

I looked back to the history book I held in my hooves. I had covered the bulk of the last thousand years in search of any mentions of astronomy, with little success. I was now at the beginning of the Technical Revolution. Only fifteen years left to cover before I could go to bed. I skimmed the page about the discovery of subatomic particles, only glancing at the sections on integrated circuits and spark batteries. While it was always enjoyable to reminisce about how far pony civilization had come in so few years, I knew these chapters so well that reading properly would be a waste of my time. The gist was simple: twenty years ago, a bored Princess Luna decided to take up the study of science; we ponies reaped the benefits. How she discovered so much in so little time, I had no idea. To say she was brilliant would be a gross understatement.

I yawned and flipped forward to the next chapter, my eyes losing their focus on the page.

There was no chance of finding anything at this point. I was only reading for the sake of completing the book. I had passed the Magic Wars of 720-731 AB with no mention of astronomy; they were by far my best hope for a mention of magical evils, but turned out to be fruitless. The recent Griffin wars of 1004-1005 AB were fought primarily with modern technology and spells, making any mention of forbidden ancient techniques very unlikely. Besides, the rapidity with which the Griffins were defeated made powerful magic largely unnecessary. It was a one-sided war in every sense: in every category from technology (Their muskets and wing blades were so inferior to our energy lances and autocannons it was laughable), to population (twenty million ponies against a few hundred thousand griffins) we held a massive advantage. Every battle was won by Equestrian Imperial forces; not a single victory could be claimed by the Griffins.

Really, I couldn't fathom why they started the war. How did they possibly expect to win? Was it that profound national pride I had heard so much about? Was it lust for the technology and magical power that we possessed?

I'd have to ask Rainbow Dash one day. She was the only pony I knew who actually saw the field of battle – and as a member of the Wonderbolts no less. She might have some profound insights to offer.

Bleh, who am I kidding? Rainbow would probably go on without end about how awesome it (read: she) was, and all the fancy war medals she had won. Attempting to engage her in 'egghead' discussions on politics and culture was bound to be futile.

Tick. Spike looked so peaceful sleeping under the table. I should've sent him up to bed before he fell asleep, but it hardly looked like he minded his makeshift nest.

No more research was going to happen tonight, whether I wanted it to or not. I needed to get upstairs before I passed out under the table with my little dragon.

Ugh. I shook my head to dispel the double vision, and struggled to my hooves. The book joined the others in the pile. Thump. I'd shelve them properly tomorrow.

I staggered towards the stairs, blanket trailing from my waist like the wrappings of an unravelled mummy. I reached for the gas valve with my magic, but paused moments before cutting the lights. I had forgotten something.

Purple energy uncoiled the blanket from my body, and carried silently across the room to rest upon his.

To my surprise, the dragon stirred. A sleepy emerald green eye opened to meet mine.

Celestial Mechanics

by Kiki3

Chapter 2: The Scientist