TMP Prompt #179 - “School Days Are Here Again”
Prompt: Back to school.
Special Rule: Twilight is not going back to magic kindergarten. (I broke it.)
-
Back for the Wrong Reasons
One look at Ms. Totenkinder told you everything you needed to know.
Her Cutie Mark was a foal lying on its back with Xs for eyes. Her own eyes were solid black with no visible pupils and yellow sclera, and she carried herself like a flabby gray-green cross between a spider and a vulture. Her limbs seemed just a little too long and too spindly. Her iron-gray mane and tail were thin and wispy, as if most of her hair had fled to escape being a part of her.
Her breath smelled of rancidness, of misery and death itself. One might wonder how anything could smell so foul, but when she cruelly turned her lips upward, revealing an vast expanse of entirely too many brown and black teeth, they would get their answer.
Said breath was being projected upon Twilight Sparkle at the moment.
“You can’t even turn a page!? Are you sure you’re even a unicorn and not some filth-crawling earth pony?” Totenkinder screeched. “I’ll bet your horn isn’t even real!”
“Twilight Sparkle can’t make a single spark!” a chubby chartreuse colt mocked.
“That’s right!” Totenkinder crowed. “You’re Twilight Spark-null!”
Twilight buried her face into her hooves, sobbing, as most of the class erupted into wicked laughter.
That day set the tone for every single other day of Magical Kindergarten.
***
“Gosh,” Pinkie said. “That sounds terrible, Twilight!”
“It’s been fifteen years and I can still hear that-that…voice.” Twilight shivered. “You have no idea how happy I was when I got into Princess Celestia’s school.”
“You know I’m definitely not the kind to say no to a party, but I seriously don’t see why you’d even want to think about going to your reunion.”
“You don’t wanna know,” Spike muttered.
“Well, Pinkie, I figure I’d go see how the food is, meet up with the classmates who weren’t jerks, see if anypony’s still a jerk…” She shrugged. You know, just…catch up. And then…”
With a *poof* the Crown of Magic appeared before her.
“And then I’ll shove this baby right in Totenkinder’s wrinkly old face!”
“Um, w-well, that does sound fun...” Pinkie backed away a little. “…I guess?”
“Oh, boy.” Spike rubbed his brow.
“Twilight Spark-null can’t turn a page, huh?” Twilight’s own face twisted into a leer. “Golly! I guess you must be a better Element of Magic than IIIIIIIII am! AH HA HA HAAAA!”
“I may be the Element of Laughter, but I really don’t like the sound of—”
Twilight couldn’t hear her.
Twilight was miles away at the moment.
“HAHAHAHAHA!” Spittle flew from her mouth. “WAHAHAHAHA!”
“We should leave her alone for a while.” Spike whispered.
Pinkie had to agree.
***
Twilight met up with Moondancer when she got to the school, and discovered that puberty had worked its magic and turned Dabbler into a decent (if still chubby) equine being.
“Where’s Ms. Totenkinder?” she asked, dandling the Crown of Magic in her hooves. “I’ve got something I want to show her.”
“Didn’t you hear?” Moondancer asked, gesturing to one of the walls, upon which images of Totenkinder magically yanking a colt’s ear, screaming at a classroom of terrified foals, and so forth, were being projected.
“Totenkinder kicked it.” Dabbler said around his mouthful of raspberry torte. “’Dancer and I went to her funeral.”
“Half the ponies there wanted to see if she was really dead.” Moondancer nodded. “Somepony stuck a stake in her corpse when nopony was looking.”
“Yeah.” Dabbler looked off the side. “…Somepony.”
“Oh.“ Twilight stared sadly at down the Crown of Magic. “I…I see.”
Then she looked up with a grin that made Moondancer cross herself (though she didn’t know why), and Dabbler choke on his last bite of torte.
“Where’s her grave?”