//------------------------------// // Showdown of the Century (a.k.a. Meet Saxton Hale) // Story: Equestria Fortress 2 // by nightelf37 //------------------------------// The seventeen ponies, one baby dragon, and five humans are still having a hard time believing who was in front of them, even though he was standing right there in in front of all of them in all his manliness. But there was undeniable proof that Saxton Hale, the CEO of Mann Co., the company that makes many of the weapons the RED and BLU teams use, is in their prescence. "You all know why I'm here, right?!", asked Saxton Hale, his voice still strong, but no longer as loud as during his introduction. "No? Well, I got FOUR reasons!" Saxton pointed at the weapons the Equestrians were wielding. "ONE, you are in violation of Mann Co. weapon copyrights!" Specifically, he pointed at Spike's Chargin' Targe and Ullapool Caber, Trixie Lulamoon's Ambassador revolver, Blue Diary's Force-A-Nature scattergun, the igniter on Pinkie Pie's Flamethrower, Rainbow Dash's Sandman bat, and Chronicle's Sandvich, which he was about to eat out of boredom. "TWO, you've proven time and time again to be a match for BLU and RED! THREE, rumors about ponies kicking RED and BLU ass doesn't sit well with me, not that I care for them!" Saxton put his fists to his hips in an akimbo position. "And FOUR, I wanna see what you girls are made of!" "Hey.", retorted Spike. "There are boys in this team too, you know!" Saxton ignored him. "Well, you don't look like hippies, so what are we waiting for?! All of you against me! Let's see if you can fare better than those RED team ladies or those BLU team sissies!" "Apologies, Mr. Hale.", said Blue Diary. "But your arrival was on such short notice and—" "You need time to prepare, of course! And I'll have to set myself to one of the Respawn machines in this place! Tell you what—" Just then, out of nowhere, a tiger came out from atop the crates and pounced on Saxton, only for the man to block the feline's bite with his arm, without so much as bleeding. "I'm giving you three hours to prepare! In the meantime, I'll enjoy this tiger's pickapeppa sauce…at RED base!" Immediately, the tiger still in tow, he leaped high into the air, arcing towards the RED side of Granary, leaving everyone dumbfounded. After a few seconds passed, Pinkie was the first to speak as she tapped her card and reverted to her normal appearance. "What a strange man." She was followed shortly by Spike, and then everypony else. And the EqU Equestrians noted that like their Trixie, the Trixie with them wore the same star-studded cape and pointy hat. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Noontime… While Dinky (Doo, not Hooves) and the LUNA ponies—save for Blue Diary—were taking their siesta, the EqU team, along with the humans, were contemplating on their current situation. They were all inside the cargo box of a dark blue semi truck, the vehicle LUNA uses for transport. The cargo box was somehow bigger on the inside ("Just like the Doctor's blue box!", Derpy Hooves noted.) thanks to technology secret to the Story Crew. It held not only Tony's contraptions similar to Thenam's, but somewhat spacious sleeping quarters, or at least better ones than those of EqU, who had to cuddle together two at a time whenever they had to sleep, which the boys were sometimes either uncomfortable to or aroused to. Currently, both tech experts were working on something special and thinking of the most optimal loadouts for the LUNA team. As for EqU, their Customizers were being borrowed by the two as they added in "something special". "Okay. First, we encounter counterparts of ponies we know from an Equestria different from ours. Now, we have to fight the CEO of Mann Co. himself together with them?", Twilight asked. "This is turning out to be an interesting day.", Chronicle managed to crack up a sarcastic smile. "I'll have to concur.", returned Blue Diary. "As always, teamwork is vital if we are to achieve victory in this fight." "Well, duh.", agreed Pinkie. "There's a reason this is called Team Fortress 2." She was instantly glared at by Blue, Chronicle, and all the humans. As for the others, they looked at her in confusion, then dismissed her. "…What?" "You very well know why.", Tasic said. "Oh, right." "Well, we managed to decide the optimal loadout each of you would use.", said Tony. "Also, we have a special gift for the both Keepers and Elements of Harmony. Spike too." While six certain ponies in EqU are addressed as the Keepers of the Elements of Harmony, six other certain ponies in LUNA (Trixie, Lyra, Carrot, Raindrops, Ditzy, and Cheerilee) are addressed as the Elements themselves. Tony and Thenam gave the six Keepers and Spike their Customizers, then gave them specific instructions on nudging the joysticks. "Now nudge right." They all did so, and their eyes widened in surprise. "The Elements of Harmony!", Twilight cried out. "Not the real ones, though. Those are still in Equestria.", said Thenam. "These are just replicas. No evil-sealing powers, no magical rainbow. Just simple pieces of jewelry." "But won't they clash with our uniforms?", asked Rarity. "No idea. Then again, some combinations may make you look like rummage sale rejects." "At least put them on for this battle.", pleaded Tony. "After that, you can take them off if you wish." "Besides, the Demoman has a crown among his possible hats.", said Joey. "And I'll have to say it looks good on him in spite of the rest of his uniform." "This will be our toughest battle yet.", waned Tasic. "You guys ready?" The nine EqU 'mercs' nodded in response. Spike then rose a hand. "Hold on a second.", he said. "Why do I also have the Element of Loyalty as a possible 'miscellaneous item'?" Twilight seemed to notice, then turned away. Chronicle noticed, then realized it. "Three words.", he said. "New Rainbow Dash." EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Note: Italicized items are 'original', except for standard, which means exactly that (i.e. black cap for the Scout, the helmet for the Soldier, the 'winter cap' for the Demoman, the hardhat for the Engineer, and the bush hat for the Sniper). For this chapter, I won't describe the new items because there are so many. I will provide links, though. Rainbow Dash's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Soda Popper 2° Weapon - Crit-a-Cola Melee Weapon - Sandman Hat - Standard Misc. Item 1 - Element of Loyalty Misc. Item 2 - None Blue Diary's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Force-a-Nature 2° Weapon - Mad Milk Melee Weapon - Justice and Retibution (a pair of short swords that inflict the same amount of damage as the Bat, no bleeding effects) Hat - Standard Misc. Item 1 - License to Maim Misc. Item 2 - Merc's Pride Scarf Derpy Hooves's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Liberty Launcher 2° Weapon - Royal Canterlot Hallmark (Provides a defensive buff that blocks 50% of incoming damage. Meter fills through damage dealt. Against Saxton Hale, it also grants 5% more health, but overheal limit is not changed accordingly. Upon hit, 'meter' is completely filled. When used, will block 60% of damage from Saxton against user and anyone within buff radius.) Melee Weapon - Shovel Hat - Wiki Cap (colored Aged Moustache Grey) Misc. Item 1 - Spirit Of Giving Misc. Item 2 - None Raindrops's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Direct Hit 2° Weapon - Reserve Shooter Melee Weapon - Shovel Hat - Standard Misc. Item 1 - Necklace of Honesty Misc. Item 2 - None Pinkie Pie's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Flame Thrower 2° Weapon - Shotgun Melee Weapon - Back Scratcher Hat - Party Hat (colored Pink As Hell) Misc. Item 1 - Element of Laughter Misc. Item 2 - Marxman (colored Pink As Hell) Ditzy Doo's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Degreaser 2° Weapon - "Mega-Detonator" (behaves like a Detonator, but allows for a very large Flare Jump at the expense of greater self-damage from explosions. Flare jump will propel the user a large distance regardless of whether it is detonated via alt-fire or via the flare exploding on contact with an object) Melee Weapon - Powerjack Hat - Attendant Misc. Item 1 - Necklace of Kindness Misc. Item 2 - HazMat Headcase Spike's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Loch-n-Load 2° Weapon - Chargin' Targe Melee Weapon - Hero's Lance Hat - Hustler's Hallmark (colored Indubitably Green) Misc. Item 1 - Element of Loyalty Misc. Item 2 - None Carrot Top's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Loch-n-Load 2° Weapon - Scottish Resistance Melee Weapon - Frying Pan Hat - Standard Misc. Item 1 - Necklace of Generosity Misc. Item 2 - Spirit Of Giving Chronicle's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Tomislav 2° Weapon - Sandvich Melee Weapon - Magic Horn Blade (as much damage as fists, but with slightly longer range and slightly slower attack rate) Hat - Heavy Artillery Officer's Cap Misc. Item 1 - Pocket Medicshy Misc. Item 2 - None BonBon's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Iron Curtain 2° Weapon - Shotgun Melee Weapon - Frying Pan Hat - Officer's Ushanka Misc. Item 1 - Pocket Lyramedic Misc. Item 2 - None Applejack's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Frontier Justice 2° Weapon - Wrangler Melee Weapon - Jag Hat - Texas Ten Gallon (colored Muskelmannbraun) Misc. Item 1 - Element of Honesty Misc. Item 2 - Ironbuckers (pony counterpart for the Gunslinger) Cheerilee's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Frontier Justice 2° Weapon - Pistol Melee Weapon - Eureka Effect Hat - Engineer's Cap (colored Color No. 216-190-216) Misc. Item 1 - Necklace of Laughter Misc. Item 2 - Builder's Blueprints Fluttershy's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Custom Syringe Gun (grants 5% Übercharge on hit and up to 10% faster movement speed based on Übercharge) 2° Weapon - Custom Kritzkrieg (25% faster Übercharge rate. ÜberCharge grants both invulnerability and critical hits to both Medic and patient, lasts 50% longer than a normal Übercharge. Start with 40% ÜberCharge, and after each ÜberCharge, gains 30% Übercharge automatically. Targets with Crit boost will also deal Mini-crit damage for indirect forms of damage if being healed. Increase running speed when healing a Scout.) Melee Weapon - Saxxy Hat - Cheater's Lament Misc. Item 1 - Element of Kindness Misc. Item 2 - Physician's Procedure Mask Lyra Heartstrings's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Custom Syringe Gun (grants 5% Übercharge on hit and up to 10% faster movement speed based on Übercharge) 2° Weapon - Custom Kritzkrieg (25% faster Übercharge rate. ÜberCharge grants both invulnerability and critical hits to both Medic and patient, lasts 50% longer than a normal Übercharge. Start with 40% ÜberCharge, and after each ÜberCharge, gains 30% Übercharge automatically. Targets with Crit boost will also deal Mini-crit damage for indirect forms of damage if being healed. Increase running speed when healing a Scout.) Melee Weapon - Solemn Vow Hat - Gentleman's Ushanka Misc. Item 1 - Necklace of Loyalty Misc. Item 2 - None Twilight Sparkle's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Sniper Rifle 2° Weapon - SMG Melee Weapon - Kukri Hat - Element of Magic Misc. Item 1 - Villain's Veil (colored A Deep Commitment to Purple) Misc. Item 2 - Triad Trinket (colored A Deep Commitment to Purple) Pokey Pierce's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Sydney Sleeper 2° Weapon - Jarate Melee Weapon - Tribalman's Shiv Hat - Larrikin Robin Misc. Item 1 - Sniper's Snipin' Glass Misc. Item 2 - Triad Trinket Rarity's Loadout: 2° Weapon - L'Etranger 2° PDA - Dead Ringer Melee Weapon - Black Rose Hat - Frenchman's Beret (colored An Extraordinary Abundance of Tinge) Misc. Item 1 - Element of Generosity Misc. Item 2 - Spirit Of Giving Trixie Lulamoon's Loadout: 2° Weapon - Ambassador 2° PDA - Dead Ringer Melee Weapon - Conniver's Kunai Hat - Tiara of Magic Misc. Item 1 - Business Casual Misc. Item 2 - None EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 An hour before the scheduled showdown… The five humans were discussing what assistance they could offer to the Equestrians as the EqU ones and Blue Diary were asked to leave the truck's cargo box. "Okay. According to the intelligence we acquired, whenever Saxton Hale goes up against a team in an Arena match, his health varies depending on how many he's up against. Add seven hundred and sixty to the number of his opponents, multiply that by the same number. The final answer is that product to the power of one point zero four.", calculated Thenam. "As he'll be facing seventeen ponies and one baby dragon, it all adds up to—", said Tony. "Twenty-thousand, five hundred and sixteen hit points." "Okay. That's a lot of hit points. Highest we could reach is four hundred fifty, a Heavy with overheal." "Uh-huh. And judging by the damage output of the Equestrians' weapons, we're still gonna take a long time to defeat Saxton.", grumbled Tasic. "But what else can we grant? This is everything the RED and BLU were granted in their fight against Hale." Joey gave a sheet of paper that listed the improvements made for the duration of the battle. "Oh I know!", Jothicu had an idea. "Unicorn magic!" "Oh, right!", said Tony. "That'll give a surprise and change of play!" EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Minutes before the scheduled showdown… "All right, girls and boys, listen up!", Tasic spoke up as he paced around like a drill sergeant in front of the eighteen. They were stationed inside the BLU spawn area, which was somehow placed where a yard was. "From our research, here's the lowdown of Saxton Hale's abilites. Apart from his mighty fists, which can send any of you away in at most two hits, three on an overhealed Heavy, he has a couple of tricks up his chest hair. "First, you've seen how high he can jump. Second, after receiving a certain amount of damage, he can unleash a powerful scream that will stun you and render your weapon systems useless for several seconds. Heavies can still melee. Also, it will halve the health of nearby Sentry Guns and disable them temporarily. He will also resist a third of the damage you would inflict on him for four seconds after. "Third, the weaker he is, the faster he gets, though he still can't catch up with Rainbow Dash uninhibited. Four, if he falls on you, it will hurt just as much as Saxton's fists. Five, after he's been airborne for five seconds, he can force himself to fall down to the ground to escape constant knockback. "And another thing. For this fight only, there are numerous bonuses." He took out the paper Joey gave him and read out the what was written there. Once he was done… "Are you all ready?" "You bet I am!" Rainbow Dash. "Uh-huh." Blue Diary. "Yepperdoodle." Derpy Hooves. "Let's do this." Raindrops. "Okie-dokie-lokie!" Pinkie Pie. "Mm-mmph." Ditzy Doo. "Yeah!" Spike. "As I'll ever be." Carrot Top. "I'm ready." Chronicle. "As am I." BonBon. "Let's show 'im what we can do." Applejack. Cheerilee said nothing and made a steely "game face". Fluttershy just nodded. "Let's go!" Lyra Heartstrings. "Let's do it." Twilight Sparkle. "Let's send him off with a piercing remark." Pokey Pierce. "Of course." Rarity. "Let the show begin." Trixie Lulamoon. "Remember. Teamwork makes the dream work. Good luck." Tasic then exited the respawn room. "Mission begins in sixty seconds." Tony's voice was heard. Immediately, as they were the defending team, and because Saxton decided to give them "mercy prep time", the eighteen moved out. As advised sometime earlier, the Engineers constructed their Dispensers on the crates and set up their Sentry Guns there and upgraded them to Level 3. The Heavies and Pyros stood guard nearby as did the Medics. Everypony else positioned themselves near the exit Saxton Hale would take and they waited for the timer to go down. "Five. Four. Three. Two. One." But instead of exiting through either the Garage or the Choke, he exited through the catwalk with a jump, surprising everypony as he then landed on one of the RED crates. "Lets get this over with!", he said. "There's a white shark waiting for me in my office!" EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 The battle proved to be the toughest fight they've ever had. Then again, both teams have yet to encounter the boss monsters found only in Halloween like The Horseless Headless Horsemann, MONOCULUS!, or its summoner Merasmus, the RED Soldier's roommate. Things got a bit out of hoof as Saxton managed to smash Cheerilee's Dispenser and Sentry Gun and knock down BonBon to the ground. Lyra saved her with an ÜberCharge and they were protected for a while, both of them glowing midnight blue like their own Princess Luna. All of LUNA bore this colored coating of energy when Übercharged, just like RED only has red and BLU only blue, unlike EqU, who bear differing colors for each member. Saxton continued to hound them down though, even as the others continued to pepper him with covering fire, especially Rainbow Dash and Blue Diary. He responded to the Scouts' attacks with backhand strikes, which were all misses. Eventually, the ÜberCharge wore off and Saxton delivered a one-two-three punch combo that sent BonBon away. He was about to go for Lyra next when Rainbow got in his way…and into Lyra's Medigun beam, allowing the LUNA Medic to escape. It also showed Blue aiming at Saxton with the Force-a-Nature. The white pegasus fired and they were both sent flying, the Australian high and the LUNA Scout higher. A rocket from Derpy sent Saxton higher, and another from Raindrops even more. Then the two of them together with Applejack and her Mini-Sentry Gun kept him in the air as Twilight and Pokey sniped him from their positions. This was further amped up with Pinkie and Ditzy's airblasts and Chronicle's minigun fire as Cheerilee proceeded to rebuild her Dispenser and Sentry. Saxton escaped from this with his "weighdown" ability. He promptly got a backstab. "Time to swat that mosquito!", he said as he turned around to deliver a punch—only to hit thin air, much to his slight confusion. As it turns out, that backstab came from Trixie. And thanks to the more liberal use of magic in this battle, she had telekinetically tossed her Conniver's Kunai, then recalled it with a special spell. With a "health bonus" secured, she quickly slunk away and cast some more spells on herself. While the Invisibility watches can grant…invisibility, not only can Trixie's spell do it better, she also knows a spell that blocks off any sounds she makes as well. She can only hope that Saxton doesn't have ridiculously good hearing like one certain earth pony musician she knows… Meanwhile, after ignoring that backstab, Saxton made his way around a crate, bypassing Trixie and catching Carrot Top in his sights as she began to lay stickybombs. He rushed for the LUNA Demomare, only for her to be whisked away by Derpy as Raindrops gave him a reminder that there were still a lot more ponies to deal with. He trod on a mine and Carrot set it off. However, this ended up bringing him closer to her and Derpy. The LUNA Demomare responded to this predicament by swinging her Frying Pan at his head, doing little (crit-boosted) damage, but pushing them off of his fists' range. However, Saxton then landed right on top of Cheerilee's newly rebuilt Sentry Gun, which he promptly smashed. "PROPERTY DAMAGE!" He was promptly soaked with Jarate courtesy of Pokey, who then jumped out of sight as everypony in range continued to assault him. Deciding he has taken enough damage, he let out a battle cry. "Saxton Hale!" This cry got all in range in a tizzy. He was about to go for Cheerilee but she had used the Eureka Effect's taunt ability during his battle cry, raising the wrench with the mech-arm on her back and teleporting in a flash of white light, returning to the spawn area. Saxton took advantage of his stun effect by jumping straight for Raindrops, grabbing her by the neck, landing on the ground pegasus-first, then hurled her straight for Derpy, who had dropped Carrot when she got stunned. The resulting collision—thanks to something in Saxton's fists—sent them both away. Hale doesn't usually throw his opponents around, not even the Scout, but the opportunity to hurl a pony was too great for him to pass up. He then went for Twilight, who had fallen to the ground after his battle cry. Upon seeing him, she quickly fled to the exit at the choke, firing back with her SMG as he followed, getting a flare from Ditzy and bypassing a Mini-Sentry moved by Applejack, which he smashed. As she turned a corner, Saxton saw a flash right after. He turned as well…to see no sign of the EqU Sniper. Hold on. What that a Spy disguised as a Sniper? Twilight had teleported herself to the rooftop of the RED spawn area to catch a breather. However, she ended up getting a much longer one. Why? Because six seconds later, Saxton's fist punched straight through the roof and right into her stomach, sending her away. "You can't hide from me!", he called out afterward before heading back to the center area to deal with the rest. However, just as he turned, he saw the EqU Demoman with a knight's lance that was as tall as him (Spike, not Saxton). Lyra was right behind him, ready for another ÜberCharge. This Hero's Lance of yours works like the Eyelander, and your card takes 14 percent more damage., Spike recalled Thenam's words. Although it doesn't really take heads, with each kill, you get healed and grow stronger not in attack power but in how much damage you can take, and running speed. But after reaching five kills, healing is all you will earn. Also, should you kill an enemy Demoman wielding the Eyelander, his bonuses are added to yours, although the reverse holds true for you as well. You also gain bonuses from taking out a Sniper with the Bazaar Bargain depending on how many consecutive headshots he's scored, I still don't know how that works. Just for this fight, you can have a taste of the Hero's Lance's maximum potential since you gain power for every hit on Saxton Hale. As the Australian ran straight for the dragon, Spike used his lance to strike at Saxton's chest and parry his punches, all while backing away, becoming faster with each hit and his eyes glowing "prophetic" white, although it did nothing to affect his vision. This was then coupled with an ÜberCharge, which made all the hits critical, especially when Spike switched to his Loch-n-Load. Saxton tried going for the LUNA Medic, but the EqU Demoman kept him back. Still, Saxton persevered by evading the attacks long enough for the ÜberCharge to fade. Once that happened, Spike switched back to his lance, but Saxton managed to shove it aside and deliver one punch, leaving Spike in critical. Before he could finish him off, even as Lyra was healing him, Spike brought his Chargin' Targe in front of himself and the fatal (send-away) blow, became a simple blow-across-the-room one as the dragon was sent flying into his healer and they were blown across the garage, past a moved Mini-Sentry Gun and back into the central yard. At the crates above, Fluttershy saw him land on the central control point, not looking very good, and Lyra looking dazed. She turned to Chronicle, who gave her the go-ahead and primed his minigun. As the EqU Medic went over to get her teammates to safety, the Chargin' Targe now in pieces, Saxton came into view and the ponies provided covering fire. The cover was enough to get Spike and Lyra out of Saxton's attention, but not the Mini-Sentry, which he smashed again. The Australian leaped upward straight for Chronicle, who repelled him with a blast of magic shaped like a ninja's throwing star, sending him flying, followed by another flare from Ditzy. However, with no Soldiers to keep him aloft with rockets, with Applejack's newly-rebuilt Mini-Sentry Gun not doing as much damage as Cheerilee's currently-being-upgraded Sentry, and with Pinkie somehow being inconspicuously absent for some reason, Saxton was on the ground a few seconds later. However, he was then doused again in Jarate, which was followed up by a backstab. "Heheheh. Oh, that tickles!" Saxton then jumped backwards…and tackled a retreating Rarity. The two landed on their backs, and then Saxton quickly got up as the EqU Spy attempted to recover from this sudden maneuver. Next, he jumped back and did an elbow drop on her, sending her away…or so he thought. "Take that, you sneaky bitch!" That was when he noticed that he's been taking steady damage from something other than the EqU Heavy's minigun fire, the Sentry Guns' fire, the LUNA Pyro's flares, the Scouts' occasional scattergun fire, or the occasional Demo-grenade, any of them being occasionally turning into critical hits thanks to the ÜberCharge. Before he can ponder further, the EqU Pyro popped up from behind him with no prior hints to being there. She seemed to be saying something, but Saxton had tuned her out as he swung in vain to land a hit on Pinkie and ran around looking for somepony in range, finding none, he screamed his name once more and everypony nearby got stunned and the Sentry Guns disabled. He turned around again to see the EqU Pyro with a hoof on her head. He made a grin as he grabbed her by the hind legs, spun around with her (but it didn't dissuade the others from firing as the FFPS would protect Pinkie), then hurled her somewhere…and right into the invisible LUNA Spy. Upon collision, Trixie obviously lost her focus and her enchantments were broken, although she managed to take something out. Saxton then rushed for them and delivered a powerful punch, sending them away. Well, one of them he was sure was gone anyway. He was then struck from behind by Spike, who was back in action and glowing a brilliant green thanks to the Übercharge, which was provided by Lyra. Spike continued his jabs until Saxton grabbed the weapon by his bare hand, and hurled the baby dragon away, prematurely breaking the beam and turning him to normal and exposing a still-Übercharged Lyra, who quickly fled the scene just as her charge ran out. Saxton quickly turned to where the EqU Demoman fell after his hurl, saw him trying to get up, then barreled straight for him. However, his kill was thwarted by his target getting whisked away by a white blur, followed by a yellow one. Saxton took pursuit as the three made their way to the BLU spawn area, where he can't catch them. He almost reached them when something suddenly appeared right in front of him. It was Chronicle who then opened fire with his Tomislav, driving the Australian back. Behind him, a Mini-Sentry was set down and it fired as Applejack was then pulled back to safety by Rainbow Dash. Saxton quickly escaped the onslaught and went straight for the unicorn, only for him to miss as an after-image of the EqU Heavy was left for him to see. Then he was shot from behind, and Saxton turned to deliver another punch, only for his fist to meet a blade. A blade of energy, that is, from the carrottop-blond unicorn's horn. "Are you really the strongest pony in your team?", Saxton asked as he attempted to grip the blade of energy, only for Chronicle to dismiss it, leaving the Australian with empty air as he jumped away and fired once more with the Tomislav. Saxton shrugged off the bullets and threw a powerful punch, sending the unicorn flying right into the Mini-Sentry, destroying it, and back to the central area. He then turned back to the BLU spawn area, only to find his previous three targets already inside. Well, the EqU Medic then made her way out and through the choke, holding the Solemn Vow, and Saxton decided to follow her. "What was I thinking when I decided to take the Mad Milk?", Blue said as he switched the liquid for the standard Pistol. "Yeah.", Spike agreed as he (unwisely) decided to switch the Hero's Lance for the Ullapool Caber, losing his boost in the process. "I wanna try something else." "Melee shouldn't even be what we're supposed to be doing, given his fists. Leave that to the Spies with their backstabs." "Except they're both taken out by Saxton. Already, seven of us are down." "No need to remind me." Unlike Chronicle, Blue wasn't too forgiving of anyone outside his friends, although not as much as a certain sister of theirs. And given what Spike in his Equestria is, he wasn't too trusting of this one, even though he's one of the good guys, although he could stay civil with him. And then he noticed what Spike had taken out. "Seriously?" "What? I'm not gonna whack the guy with it. I'm not drunk." "Hold on. You'll lose your Lance's bonuses if you switch. Are you sure you wanna do this?" "Oh, all right." With that, Spike decided to stick with the Hero's Lance. Just then, two others came in, two others they thought were sent away by Saxton Hale, and were headed straight for the Resupply lockers. "Rarity!", cried out Spike in relief. "You're all right!" "Trixie!", called out Blue. "Took you long enough." Both Spies showed their Dead Ringers, which explained their still being in the fight, then started changing their equipment, eying each other with suspicion all the while, clearly not too comfortable with each other's company. The LUNA one switched her Ambassador for the Enforcer while the EqU one switched her Black Rose for the Conniver's Kunai. Meanwhile, Chronicle was about to scarf down his Sandvich, but that was deemed unnecessary thanks to Lyra healing him. And then he saw Fluttershy firing the Syringe Gun and coming fast out of the choke, Saxton on her tail. Impulse told him to rush in, but his 'card' has somewhat lowered his running speed, although he's still faster than the average Heavy. Also, he had to learn to trust his teammates. Luckily, they pulled through; Applejack descended with a new Mini-Sentry Gun, unloaded it, took out the Wrangler, and used it to open fire on Saxton. Carrot stood close by, launching grenades to hit Saxton. Fluttershy swerved from the attacks meant for the man behind, even though she knows the FFPS would protect her. However, Saxton was getting faster now, and seemed to be ignoring the knockback. He then leaped up high, with intent to pounce on the Mini-Sentry. As Applejack aimed her Mini-Sentry up, Carrot motioned for the pegasus to move away as she planted stickybombs while both earth ponies retreated. Saxton landed on top of the Mini-Sentry, then smashed it with one punch in spite of its small force field. "PROPERTY DAMAGE!" He was promptly blasted into the air by the stickybombs left behind. However, before they blew up, he managed to land in a spot where he would be blown straight for his two targets, even as he was blown a bit to the side by an airblast from Ditzy, who was on the crates. Saxton decided to deal with her later as he continued to pursue the LUNA Demomare and the EqU Engineer, both of them shooting back at him as they made their way into the garage and up the ramp, granting access to the crates above. Carrot planted some more bombs as they got back on the crates and next to Applejack's Dispenser. However, their reloading was unnecessary as Saxton then bellowed, "Stop, right there!" and his battle cry stunned the two…as well as one other in range, and Chronicle who was following behind. He promptly jumped after the two earth ponies, then sent them away and destroyed the Dispenser. "Your metal toys are no match for me!" He then jumped down…and onto a stunned Rainbow Dash, sending her away as well upon landing. "You just got signed by Saxton Hale's FIST!" He then received a headshot from Pokey, who stood a fair distance away next to Fluttershy and Cheerilee's Level 3 Sentry Gun, which was now covered in a near-black-and-blue force field. As it was, upon returning to the spawn area, she had switched her Pistol for the Wrangler and was now aiming for him. Ignoring the returning LUNA Scout and EqU Demoman as they fired away at him, not to mention the EqU Heavy—who seems to have closed his eyes in focus on something and was still being healed up by Lyra, or at least building up an Übercharge—and another invisible irritating form of damage, Saxton jumped up and proceeded to run around and smash away at the Sentry Gun. Pokey had moved away before the jump and had hurled another Jarate, increasing the damage Saxton's taking. Fluttershy retreated as well and—for the second time—fired on him, not exactly to hurt him but to build her Übercharge and speed to run and save whoever she can. Before long however, the machine was destroyed and Saxton made his way to the three ponies, who decided to get down to the others. He managed to nail a punch on Pokey before he could get down, sending him away. Before the Australian could follow the rest however, he was blasted back by an invisible attack…and it wasn't an airblast as Ditzy was too far away for it to be accurate. As it turns out, Chronicle has developed something akin to the Heavy's taunt. Since he didn't have any fingers to do the Showdown, being a pony and all, he developed alongside Tasic and Thenam this new "Silent Shuriken" spell as a substitute. It normally uses a lot of magic energy, but while fighting as a Heavy, there is little energy use. As Saxton crashed on the other side of the crates, Spike came around with the Hero's Lance, Lyra behind him ready for an Übercharge, and charged right for the Australian. As he attacked, from above on the crates Saxton was seconds ago, Ditzy came over and shot flares, blowing the Australian about. Spike and Lyra pulled back just as their Übercharge expired, only for Chronicle and Fluttershy to emerge from the other side and attack, their Übercharge ready and soon running. While that happened, Blue had carried Cheerilee up to her Dispenser and she began rebuilding her Sentry. Once it was Level 1, she started upgrading it while the other four continued attacking. Just then, Saxton let out his battle cry just as Spike and Lyra were in range turn to attack and the latter about to unleash her Übercharge, leaving them (and Ditzy) stunned. He quickly took advantage of this and delivered a one-two-three punch combo, sending them both away. Then he leaped up to the crate, not noticing Ditzy, but seeing Cheerilee and Blue. Just as the LUNA Engineer finished upgrading to Level 3, it began to open fire on the Australian, but he shrugged off the bullets and jumped up to smash it to pieces even as the LUNA Engineer and Scout were already on the retreat, the former with the Dispenser in tow. At this point, the control point was activated. "Control point enabled, move!", Tony called out from wherever they were. "Please don't lose, Mommy!", Dinky called. Meanwhile, as Saxton managed to catch up with Cheerilee, she dumped her Dispenser, which he smashed quickly, and split up from Blue just as they exited the garage. Naturally, that turned out to be a bad idea since Saxton decided to go for her than chase down a speedy Scout. After all, they have the same vitality, and an Engineer was more of a threat with their buildings and all. Since he has taken so much damage throughout the fight, Saxton caught up with Cheerilee and sent her away with a powerful punch, leaving four ponies left to take care of as far as he was concerned. Upon hearing that the control point was open, Saxton took the quickest route there…which was also the same route Blue was taking, and thus he continued the chase. At the center, the remaining three ponies gathered on it. Luckily for the pegasi, thanks to their 'cards', they are still treated as "on the point" even when hovering above it as long as they don't exceed the height of a Level 3 Dispenser. Just then, the two unicorn Spies uncloaked themselves on the point, startling the three already there, who called out their names in surprise. Before they could talk further, Blue entered their sights and so did Saxton as he saw what was about to happen. "Capping the point in a fight with me is surefire sign of a hippie!" Just as Blue joined his teammates, Fluttershy activated the Übercharge on Chronicle, Saxton was on the point well before it can be captured and thus secure victory for the ponies. In spite of the fact that he can take them down in one hit or that his taunt can spell doom for all of them, the remaining ponies stood their ground. Luckily for them, he wasn't charged enough yet as he was held at bay by the EqU Heavy's flurry of slashes with his "magic horn blade", which inflicted as much pain as the Heavy's fists, and when the Übercharge wore off, he and the LUNA Scout kept his fists at bay with their blades and the latter kept him from just taking off into the air, their movements strangely in sync despite not meeting one another for so long. The rest kept their distance just outside the point, firing streams of fire, syringes, or revolver rounds. At one point, a burning Saxton managed to escape the two brothers and send away Rarity for good before getting 'snagged' back in. Trixie then 'hurled' her knife at Saxton's back, who said, "Feels like a razor!", then decided that he's taken enough damage, and cried out "Saxton Hale!" Or at least that was what he did after Trixie quickly tackled him out of the point and towards the garage. However, she wasn't able to get Saxton out of the range enough before he unleashed it, spelling her doom and catching the others she was supposed to save in its range. Saxton quickly dealt with the LUNA Spy, made sure she was gone for good for this round, then rushed right for the point to finish off everyone else, only for a blade of energy to stop him in his tracks. As it was, even while stunned, the EqU Heavy could still attack physically. And to everyone's surprise, this blade had pierced right through his chest hair, a second before the point was captured. "Nooo!", Saxton cried out before falling to the ground as the "horn blade" was 'withdrawn'. "Saxton... Hale..." "Victory!", whooped Tasic. And the remaining four sighed in relief. "That was way too close!", gasped Chronicle. "Why didn't you inform us?", Blue Diary asked Fluttershy as Saxton's body disappeared, presumably to respawn. Since she had the Solemn Vow, she would have intel on the enemy's condition. He then read the expression on her face, then said, "Never mind. Probably too tense to tell. And I don't think you would've told us given who would directly contribute to another's loss via information, although healing to keep us up is a contribution." EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 After the battle… Everybody was gathered in the center area, a newly revived Saxton on one side, EqU and LUNA on the other. For some reason, Saxton still looked a bit tired, perhaps still in denial from the fact that a bunch of ponies (and a single baby dragon) did what trained psychopaths and killers could not. Even though those ponies had the ability of flight and mystical powers like one of the mercenaries' roommates. "Wow.", Tony said as he saw Dinky and Ditzy embrace each other, with Derpy looking sad, probably missing her own Dinky. "I can't believe Saxton Hale was just defeated." "I…" Saxton had a hand to his face as he rubbed his forehead, then made a stance that might or night not have been a bluff. "Let's have another go at it!" "What?", Spike complained. "Don't you have a 'white shark' waitin' in your office?", asked Applejack. "What's a white shark?", Pinkie wanted to know. "Oh, right.", said Blue, recalling a place called Andalantis. "Most of you have never been to the sea. Or any very deep water for that matter." He gave a shudder noticeable only to just a few. He wasn't going to tell them that he hated deep water. "I have.", Derpy said. "The Doctor took me to the beach once. We encountered the Daleks again. Don't remember what they wanted." Saxton interrupted the talk by slamming his fists together. "I'll endanger you like I've endangered hundreds of other animals!" This gave a small shock to everybody, but one of them was horrified most of all, and she then stepped forward. Saxton noticed this, put his arms down and paused as Fluttershy walked up to him, then hovered so that her face met with his. What happened next was something so awesome no one from the Story Crew bothered to remember in detail. She gave him a harsh reprimand that was only compounded with her Stare. The Equestrians were amazed at this ability, the LUNA ones (even Blue) more so since this sort of thing was virtually nonexistent for their Fluttershy, and the Story Crew humans were awed at seeing this in action and affecting the overly manly Australian. One of the LUNA ponies, Carrot Top, seemed envious as well. Once she was done, the EqU Medic backed off for a bit, then landed on the ground. Saxton looked tensed, obviously trying to show that he wasn't afraid and denying to himself that he was. He'd never live it down if he admitted it. In the end, he managed to keep a straight face as he said, "Oookay! Looks like you ponies really should not be underestimated! I think I'll let you continue your fights here in Mann's Land. I was going to snitch you to Mrs. Helen, but I really think I shouldn't. Well, I guess I should leave. Wouldn't want to keep that white shark waiting!" He then tipped his hat, then leaped off into the distance, crying out his name as he faded out of sight, leaving a twinkle in the sky. Once he was gone, everybody sighed in relief, their greatest trial yet over. As for Carrot Top however, she walked up to Fluttershy, got her attention, then said, "Is it possible for you to teach me what you did to Mr. Hale?" EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Later… "So what's Lyra like in your Equestria?" "Oh, quite like you. Marefriends with Bon Bon, upbeat, musician, best in the lyre. But she isn't lazy, she's also with Golden Harvest, who is best friends wih Derpy. And while you want to keep away from having hands for as long as possible, she on the other hoof is fascinated with them." Chronicle was talking with the mint green unicorn while they walked across the central area. He could see Carrot Top and Applejack talking and listening in awe about each other's worlds' counterparts. Applejack was awed that her counterpart's farm is a booming business, a near-monopoly in fact, but is disturbed by her paranoia and underestimation of its staying power. Carrot was amazed that her counterpart's rivalry with Applejack is more friendly, is already friends with Derpy, and is…more an "action mare". "Well, she may think otherwise once she becomes something like Joey nd Tony are. How is she fascinated with them if humans don't exist in Equestria?" "Surprisingly, her desire for hands has something to do with pegasi, about them using their wings for playing the lyre. That and seeing Spike do stuff with his hands." "Oh.", Lyra said as they bypassed Twilight and Trixie, who were discussing magic, power vs. skill. "If you're worried about paper cuts, and believe me I know what those are, there are always gloves." He glanced at Joey and Jothicu, who seemed to be conversing with one another, the latter holding a Sandvich. "Well that's a comforting thought." EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Meanwhile… As they bypassed Raindrops conversing with Rainbow Dash and Ditzy Doo and Derpy Hooves having fun with Dinky, Blue Diary was asking Tony something. "I've been meaning to ask, but…" "But what?" "We've been told that should we ever leave Equestria or whatever world we're assigned to that doesn't have humans, we'd resume our normal forms, right?" "Right." "Then why am I still a pony? And Chronicle too. Not that I have problems with it." "You see, it has something to do with the mass teleportation that was supposed to bring your friends and Sparkler here.", Tony explained as they stopped for a while. "You do know that you all had a difficult time getting used to your weapons and gadgets and fighting and not-really-killing and stuff?" "Yeah?" "We didn't want to add the problem of—" "Dealing with having human bodies?", a different voice asked. "Why ye—whoa!" In the middle of the conversation, Chronicle had broken off of his conversation with Lyra and was now beside them. "How'd you get here without us noticing?", asked Tony. "Well, when you got someone with Toon traits for a friend, you tend to pick up a few things." "Pinkie Pie.", Blue grumbled. "But how'd you know what I was gonna say?", Tony wanted to know. "I asked Tasic the same question an earlier time." "Oh, I see." Tony paused for a moment. "What do you want to do now?" "From what Tasic told me after our showdown with Saxton Hale, BLU has left Egypt and will be returning to Mann's Land, but RED is nowhere to be found." "I see. So we'll be parting ways?" "We'll keep in touch. And I'm sure we can stick together on the road for a while, right?" "Right." "I'm glad we're through with Saxton Hale.", Blue gave a sigh of relief. "You can say that again." And the three boys laughed in relief. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 And that's it for now. "Are you sure Lunaverse Trixie would do that? You know…" Not really, no. Maybe Ditzy would, but… "Okay. Never mind." If you readers want to know the "special spell" Trixie used, check out Helping…Hands? Also, in case you're confused with the mech-arms, they've been around since the first chapter, holding the weapons for the non-unicorn ponies. Also, I apologize if the battle is not faithful to all the VS Saxton Hale Mod battles. I don't actually play Team Fortress 2. "Half its fans don't." See ya on Third!