//------------------------------//
// Glorious Goodbyes  
// Story: Evergreen, Everfree 
// by Blarghalt 
//------------------------------//

Dipper sprung into action when he heard his sister's screams. The cries for help chilled his spine; he had never heard his sibling this scared, and Mabel once poked Bigfoot's eye with the fun stick without flinching. Tree branches and roots fought him every step of the way as the screaming grew louder. He didn't know what was around the next cluster of trees, and picked up the heaviest branch he could find as he rounded the fir and struck the most menacing post he could.

"I'm here Mabel! I'm..." he declared before trailing off. Instead of finding his sister at the mercy of some horrible monster, he saw Pinkie crying for help, her legs bound in a snare at the top of a branch. 

"Heeeeelp! Heeeeeelp! Oh, hi Dipper! Heeeeeeelp!" 

Not the person he was looking for, but whoever tied her up probably knew where Mabel was. He tried to convince Pinkie to be quiet and stay still long enough so he could figure out how to get her down, but she only screamed more. Eventually her rocking broke the branch she was tied to and it snapped, sending the pink pony and the tree limb plummeting down to the Earth. Dipper ran over and untied the knots to the branch.

"How did you end up there?" 

Pinkie frowned, "Oh, you're not gonna believe it! I was just walking along and I saw a piece of candy on the ground! So I thought, 'Woohoo! Free candy!' So I gobbled it up and there was another piece of candy! Best day ever! I kept following the line of chocolate and all of the sudden I'm hanging from a tree! That little guy was really rude too. He—" 

"Gideon!"

Pinkie nodded, "Yeah! He had a really weird glowing gem. He zapped me with it, and then he ran off. And then you found me!" 

Dipper scratched his chin, "And you didn't notice anything...weird about him?" 

Pinkie opened her mouth to answer before Mabel's cries for help once again rang through the forest. 

"Oh man! Oh man! If Gideon's got Mabel, we'll never reach her in time!" 

"Never say never! Unless you think 'never' is a funny word! Then you say it all the time until Twilight or Rainbow Dash or Applejack tells you to stop!"

"What?" 

"Nothing! Let's ride!" 

Dipper jumped on Pinkie's back, but she refused to move. "Pinkie! We've gotta go!"

"Nuh uh. You gotta say the magic word first!"

"Pinkie!" 

"That's it!" Pinkie squealed, and both of them sped off towards Gravity Falls. 





Gideon had not counted on how hard it would be to tie Mabel to a lamp post when he lacked thumbs and she punched him every step of the way. He still had a few rope fibers in his mouth, but Mabel was secure and unable to escape what he had planned. 

"Let me go you crazy midget horse!" she growled and began chewing her own bindings. 

"But I did this for you, Mabel Pines."

"I am not marrying a horse, Gideon!"

Gideon's eyes flared and he snorted, "My name is not Gideon! That was my human name! You can call me Far Sight. It's the only name I'll answer to now." 

Mabel blinked. "Pfffffttthahahaha! Far Sight! And I guess my name'll be Shooting Star or something, right?" 

"Yes, actually," Gideon replied, picking up a small glowing gem with his mouth, "This little doohickey here—"

"Heh heh. Doo." 

"—has such a wonderful little feature," Gideon said as he turned his back and went into full monologue mode, "You see, a long time ago some people found out about that little hole in the forest. So they went through, and what did they find but the most delightful land of ponies and magic and friendship? They liked it so much, they never wanted to leave! That's went they found this little number in that little ol' mine shaft. With just a small genetic sampling from any pony, it can turn anyone into a pony. You, for example. Don't you see Mabel? We can be together forever!"

Mabel rolled her eyes, "Nah. I like having fingers." 

Gideon bit down on the gem and it glowed with a brilliant blue hue, "Too bad!" 

Before he could fire it, he was hit in the side by a pink blur and he gem flew out of his mouth. The beam went wide, down the street and towards the still-unconscious Blubs and Durland. The blue streak of energy hit them both and with a bright flash they were turned into earth ponies, with donut cutie marks. 

The force of the impact sent Gideon flying and he smashed up against the Gravity Falls Gossiper. He rose to his hooves to see Dipper riding on top of Pinkie Pie, both of them glaring at him angrily. 

"Give it up, Gideon!" Dipper said as he pointed the tree branch he had acquired earlier at the former human, "Mabel's not going to marry you!" 

"I beg to differ!" Gideon yelled as he dove for them gem. He reached it before Pinkie and Dipper had a chance to intervene, and he bit down on the smooth artifact. A red orb of energy enveloped him, and when it cleared it was apparent that he had gained wings. He launched himself at Mabel and plucked her right out of her rope bindings, carrying her off into the sky with his front hooves while she punched his stomach every inch of the way. 

It was at this time that Soos' pickup truck appeared around the corner and stopped right in front of Mabel's rescuers with an awkward shake. The Mystery Shack's sort-of-janitor poked his head out the window. 

"Dude! My Soos Sense was going kooky! You guys need help?" 

"Do we ever!" Dipper replied as he and Pinkie jumped into the bed of the truck. "Follow that pegasus!"

Soos stepped on the gas, burning rubber as the poorly-maintained vehicle followed Gideon. 

They pursued him for a while before Gideon turned around and the gem in his mouth grew bright. "That's it! Try driving a truck now!" he screamed as a bolt was sent right at Soos' vehicle. It phased right through the windshield and hit Soos square in the chest. He was instantly transformed into a fat earth pony.

The truck swerved all over the road as Soos struggled to maintain control with his hooves. Pinkie and Dipper fared little better as they were thrown all about the bed.

"Dudes! I'm crazy wiggin' out!" pony Soos yelled as the truck veered off the road and hit a large boulder. The force of the impact send Pinkie and Dipper flying upward and toward Gideon. Pinkie overshot the little maniac but Dipper managed to catch his back legs.

"Mabel's not going to marry you, Gideon!" 

Mabel continued to fight her captor. "Yeah! Marrying ponies isn't even legal!"

Gideon growled, "It's Far Sight! And true love knows no laws!" he bellowed as he bit the gem again and grew a horn. While he was distracted with his upgrade, Dipper took the opportunity to kick Gideon in the stomach at the same time Mabel punched him, knocking the wind out of him. His wings cramped up and they all went into a freefall, screaming all the way down toward the same clearing where they had discovered the well. 

The driver's door opened on Soos' steaming truck as the transformed manchild fell out of the car and stood up, looking at one of his hooves. "I wonder..." he said aloud before crouching down and taking a bite of grass. He spit it out and continued to spit until the aftertaste was gone. "Ewwww! Still not good!" 





Luckily, the three hit the high branches of one of the evergreens and they tumbled down it instead of hitting the ground full-force. They were deposited on the very edge of the clearing Dipper had discovered, the mine shaft clearly visible upon the small hill. Gideon was the first to come to and he grabbed Mabel, dragging her towards the portal. Mabel started to fight as she woke up and Dipper recovered as well, jumping and grabbing onto Mabel's legs as Gideon dragged them both.

When they were at the mine shaft, Gideon turned around with the gem in his teeth shining with power. "Now, Shooting Star, we can live out the rest of our days as perfect alicorn spouses! We'll live forever in pony paradise. Won't it be wonderul?" 

Mabel and Dipper closed their eyes for the inevitable blast, but it never came. They instead heard Gideon cry out in pain. Mabel opened her eyes to see Waddles standing on top of the defeated pony Gideon, his beady little eyes seemingly ignorant of his feat.  

"Waddles!" she cried and she ran over to him. "I swear I'll never eat another piece of bacon as long as I live!" 

Gideon moaned from the weight on top of him. When Waddles had landed on him, he had dropped the gem and it had rolled right in front of Dipper. He picked it up, inspecting it closely.

Gideon reached out one hoof. "Don't you touch that! If it gets cracked, it'll—" 

He covered his mouth before he revealed too much. Dipper smiley coyly as he set the gem on the ground, then stomped it into dust. A massive eruption of white light emerged from the remains of the gem and for a moment the entire countryside of Oregon was set alight. When the luminescence finally subsided, Gideon was back to normal and so were Soos and the cops. 

The former pony looked up at his normal human hands and threw a temper tantrum, "I was so close! We could've been so happy in Equestria! It's not fair! Not not not fair!" 

Dipper got up. "Gideon, kidnapping people and screaming at them isn't going to make them like you any more. You could try, you know, not attempting to curse or vaporize anyone who makes you mad." 

Gideon's tears dried instantly as he jumped up and pointed a finger at Dipper, "Never! This isn't over yet, Dipper Pines!" he said before taking off into the forest. 

As Mabel continued to hug Waddles, she noticed something different about her pig. Both of his sides were covered in medals and awards, and he was wearing some kind of tiara on his head. He was also wearing Dipper's hat on his curly tail. "Waddles! Did you have an adventure without me?" 

Waddles oinked. When he did, Pinkie Pie landed on her head next to the twins. 

"Whoops! Aimed too high! So, did we win?





Mabel and Pinkie (plus Waddles) spent most of the next day hanging out in peace, covering every location and causing mayhem in all the places they had missed on the first. When the sun began to set, they all met at the mine shaft in the clearing.

"So, I guess this is goodbye," said Dipper, with a voice much more forlorn than he expected. He had found Pinkie kind of annoying at first, but the pink little blob of fun had grown on him.

Mabel's eyes were overflowing with tears as she squeezed the pink pony, "You're eighteen kinds of awesome, Pinkie! I'm gonna miss you so much!" 

Pinkie patted Mabel's back, "I know, I know. Gummy's probably worried sick about me. And hey, we can always visit each other!"

Mabel dried her tears, "Yeah, that's true. Hey, when I visit you, let's eat cookies until they ban them!" 

Pinkie high-hooved Mabel, "Yeah!" She and Mabel hugged one last time before she walked up to the edge of the mine shaft. She looked over her shoulder at the waving twins and waved back before jumping down the shaft and back to her own world.





The well spat her out with no ceremony and she hit the ground with her tummy. She patted herself off before looking up at the sky, "Huh. Only evening. I bet I can still find Gummy!"

She began to call after her pet, not knowing that he had been waiting at the well's edge for hours and bit onto her as soon as she emerged from the portal. He was still clutched tightly onto her tail as she walked deeper into the Everfree Forest, continually asking for the little alligator to come to mama. 

THE END