//------------------------------// // Chapter 10: Guns For Sale // Story: My Little Wasteland // by ThatBronyWithTheClipOns //------------------------------// Spike and the Apple siblings got everything they needed in preparation to head into the Badlands. While outside, the all saw a crowd surrounding what appeared to be a stage on wheels. “What in tarnation do ya suppose that is,” said Applejack. “Looks like somepony is giving some sort of presentation,” said Spike. “Let’s go check it out,” said Apple Bloom with great enthusiasm. “It is on the way,” said Applejack. “Eeyup,” said Big Macintosh. The group went over to the sizeable crowd, trying to see what all the commotion was. “What’s goin on here,” Applejack asked a random pony. “Not sure,” he said. “But it sure looks exciting!” Suddenly the doors of the wagon stage began to open, followed by a puff a smoke. Then two silhouettes began to appear through the smoke. The Apple Siblings and Spike squinted to see who they were. Soon as the smoke cleared, it became very clear as to who they were. “I don’t believe it,” said Spike. “It’s them,” said Applejack. “Eeyup,” said Big Macintosh. “The Flim Flam Brothers!” exclaimed Apple Bloom. “Fillies and gentle colts,” said Flim, of the Flim Flam Brothers. “Welcome to the most exciting, fantastic, wondrous, and epic of presentation! Am I right dear brother of mine!?” “You are indeed correct, dear brother,” proclaimed Flam, the other half of the duo. “We, the world famous Flim Flam Brothers are you to present you fine pony folk the finest weapons that Equestria has to offer!” “Weapons!?” our foursome exclaimed. “That’s right weapons,” said Flim. “It’s a savage, deadly world out there! Bounty hunters are in need to top notch weapons and top notch explosives! Am I Correct Flam!?” “Correct you are, Flim,” exclaimed Flam. “Especially for you bounty hunters planning to travel far out into the dreaded, dangerous, and down right unpleasant Badlands!” Both made a shiver motion and made woo noises in unison. “The Badlands is no place to be unarmed,” said Flim. “And the shopkeepers are charging crazy amounts just for a simple revolver!” “Indeed indeed,” said Flam. “So that’s why we, the Flim Flam Brothers, are here to offer you bounty hunters and aspiring bounty hunters a chance to purchase quality weapons at quality prices!” The Apple Gang and Spike looked on in amazement. It never occurred to them that these two would still be around, and weapon merchants no less. “Can you believe this,” said Applejack. “Well I’ll be,” exclaimed Flim. “I do believe my eyes aren’t deceiving me! Dear brother of mine, come here and see.” “I’ll be a son of a gun,” said Flam. “It’s the Apple Family. My my, Apple Bloom, you certainly have grown!” “Back off, bud,” said Applejack. “What are ya’ll doing sellin guns?” “Well that should be obvious,” said Flim, “My brother and I are all about opportunity. The apple business has been dead for quite some time. And the name of the game is money.” “Correct you are, brother,” said Flam. “With the state this world is in, bounty hunting being at it’s peek, it was clear that gun manufacturing was the way to go.” “So how about we make a deal,” said Flim. “No thanks,” said Applejack. “Ah no better than to get mixed up with you two. Sides, Apple Bloom makes our weapons for us.” “Fine then, your loss,” said Flam. “Yer givin up,” said Apple Bloom. “Just like that?” “There’s no time to be convincing you to use our weapons,” said Flim. “Time is money, and we make a ton of it. So we don’t sell to you, still a whole wide world out there.” “Indeed there is,” said Flam. “We hope to make a killing in the Badlands. No pun intended.” “Yer gonna sell to the criminals of the Badlands,” exclaimed Applejack. “We don’t discriminate on who we sell to, Miss Apple,” said Flim. “If they got the money, we got the guns.” “What they do with them is their own business, not ours,” said Flam. “They have a point,” said Spike. “What, how can ya say that, Spike,” said Applejack. “We’re not in a position to tell them how to run their business,” said Spike. “Besides it’s not as if bounty hunting is a totally a noble profession. We’re doing this because, like the Flim Flam Brothers and weapon selling, bounty hunting a profitable profession. Not to mention, even we have bounties on our heads.” Applejack tried to come up with a logical response to what Spike just said. But she couldn’t, he was right. “You gotta point,” said Applejack. “How come ya’ll didn’t become bounty hunters,” Apple Bloom asked the Flim Flam Brothers. “Simple, my fare filly,” said Flim. “We are not warriors by any means.” “That is correct,” said Flam. “Ponies such as us have no business in the battlefield.” “We’re far better off being behind the scenes,” said Flim. “Ponies such as yourself are ideal for this lifestyle given your past lives in hard labor.” “Indeed,” said Flam. “You got the right backbone for it.” “I will say this though,” said Flim. “Quite surprising to see the number one assistant of the cur…” Before Flim finished that sentence, he saw the angry look in Spike’s eyes. “Pardon…Twilight Sparkle,” Flim continued. “Surprising to see you as a rough and tumble bounty hunter.” “Life’s full of surprises,” commented Spike. “Very true,” said Flim. “Quite true,” said Flam. “Anyway,” said Flim. “While this little reunion has been delightful and all. My brother and I must be on our way. But I’m sure our paths will cross again while going to the Badlands.” “So have a splendid day,” said Flam. The Flim Flam Brothers got back into their cart, with the stage retracting and them driving off into the mountains. “Couple of weirdos,” commented Applejack. “Eeyup,” agreed Big Macintosh. “We should head out now,” said Spike. “Damn skippy,” exclaimed Apple Bloom. “Let’s get out there and take down some outlaw scum!” “I still have to ask though. How are we gonna bring our bounties back,” asked Spike. “No problem there, Spike, “said Applejack. “The Apple Gang is always prepared.” “Eeyup,” said Big Macintosh. Big Macintosh ran off for a moment, coming back with two big carts. “How much stuff are you brining,” asked Spike. “They aint both for supplies,” said Apple Bloom. “One cart is for our weapons and supplies,” said Applejack. “While the other will carry our bounties. Big Macintosh may have a bit of a handicap, but he’s still just as strong as he ever was.” “Eeyup,” said Big Macintosh with a prideful smile. “Looks good,” said Spike. “So who all is ready for an adventure into the great unknown,” asked Apple Bloom. “Glad somepony is excited,” said Spike. “Oh come on,” said Apple Bloom. “Sure it’s dangerous, sure it’s unknown, sure there might be hundreds of dangerous criminals who’ll do anything to survive. But what’s the worst that can happen?” The rest of the group decided not to answer that question, hoping she was being sarcastic. They packed up everything they needed and rode off towards the mountains that would lead them to the Badlands.