//------------------------------// // Sweet N' Spicy chapter 1 // Story: Sweet N' Spicy // by Shahrazad //------------------------------// Sweet N' Spicy By Shahrazad FLOP! The stack of fan mail grew precariously higher. Soarin hated reading it all, the letters all said the same things over and over. Once, a long time ago, he had greedily opened every piece of fan mail. Spitfire and the others just chuckled when they saw him tearing through the stack. He didn’t understand at the time, but he did now. Some of the mail was nice, thanking him for visiting or a picture of him in a flattering light. Some of the mail included requests for autographs or visits to little podunk towns. He didn’t set the schedule and even with his generous salary he couldn’t afford enough stamps for all of the autograph requests. Then there were the truly creepy pieces of mail. The first time he received a marriage proposal he nearly collapsed. Now he understood that was only the tamest of them. They always showed a level of obsession that went way over the line. They knew things even he didn’t know about himself. They often involved fantasy…encounters…with mares (or sometimes stallions!) that were quite explicit. They were sometimes very creative, one included feathers, but not for flying. Another included cupcakes in a way that was most certainly not their intended purpose. Besides obsession the only thing they had in common was they gave him the creeps. He stopped reading so much fan mail and the stack grew rapidly out of control. He flipped through the new arrivals. None of the return addresses caught his eye so they went unopened. He sighed and glanced at the picture on his desk. The stunning mare in the picture smiled back at him, and the memories returned. ~~~~~ His cheeks hurt he smiled so much. His wings twitched with excitement. He should have been tired, but he felt like dynamite with an unlit fuse. The crowd was cheering but the blood pumping in his ears made everything else seem far away. Somepony put a ribbon with a medal around his neck followed by a heavy green wreath. Confetti rained down around him, caressing him softly. Spitfire was next to him on his left and opened her mouth to say something. He should have been able to hear her, but it was just noise to him. Suddenly he felt something soft and warm against his right side. He turned just in time to receive a kiss on the cheek. Not a peck. It was the flame that lit his fuse. He turned to see a pure white mare on his right. She was stunning, with a body that belonged in fantasies. Tall and thin, her smile was nothing short of dazzling. Soarin pulled his wings down, his right wing pulling her even closer. He hadn’t even realized when he spread them. He swallowed and felt soft static, like a velvet curtain drawn over his mind. She smelled sweet, like sugar. He leaned over and kissed her on impulse. In the background light bulbs went off like fireworks, unnoticed. The tabloids would get their pound of flesh today. She quickly pulled away from him. “Well hi big boy, my name is Fleur.” Her voice was like her scent, sweet and soft. “You think I could spend a little time with the big winner?” She arched her neck and head just so, towards the cameras. Through the static, nothing else existed but her. He felt more than heard himself say, “yes.” ~~~~~ SLAM Soarin snapped into the present, his hoof knocking the picture face down. He had been idly holding it and slapped it face down on instinct. Spitfire was standing behind him. He hadn’t even heard her come in. “Are you ready for the party?” “Um, what party? I didn’t know there was going to be a party today.” Cotton was rapidly clearing out of Soarin’s head. He was certain he hadn’t heard anything about a party today. “Not today, the one at Sugercube corner. I set everything up so the team could get a few days of R&R in Ponyville, then off to the next derby.” Spitfire looked at Soarin, furrows creeping across her brow and her mouth becoming slowly flat. “It’s just a goodbye party, did you want me to wear something special?” Soarin knew Spitfire took care of her team, but she also liked to take care of the fans. She tried hard to do both at the same time but for some team members it was more difficult. Sometimes making one happy meant making the fans unhappy or vice versa. She meant well, but sometimes she pushed Soarin into uncomfortable situations. He tried his best, but his performance was best on the race track. “No, it’s more than a goodbye party. Don’t you ever look at a calendar?” Soarin looked at his calendar now. There was the party penned in, it was in three days, his heart skipped a beat. Oh no. “You mean you set the party on…Hearts and Hooves day?!” Soarin put all of the pieces into place. “Uh, no I’m not ready for the party.” His voice was quiet. He had a good guess as to what was coming next. “Well you’d better find a date pronto. That’s an order.” Spitfire gave him a look that would brook no argument. She could be very pushy sometimes. “It IS a thank you party but it’s also a couples party.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “That includes you.” “Right…right…so Spitfire-” He began only to be cut off. “Oh no you don’t, I already have a date.” Her expression softened, she sighed and placed a hoof on his shoulder. “Soarin, it was over four years ago. Let her go.” She gently pushed the face down picture away from his hoof. “You need to try again.” Spitfire had been his date for the last three years on Hearts and Hooves day. It wasn’t romantic, it was just a cover for the tabloids and fans. Spitfire refused to allow fraternization between Wonderbolts, but that policy was an internal matter that only the Wonderbolts knew about. It was probably a good policy since Soarin had tried to make a few moves the first time, a few pathetic moves. Spitfire wouldn’t admit it out loud but he was good looking and if she allowed herself to it might have worked for about a month, but he was far too immature. And this would be swiftly followed by a break up and the inevitable fallout, followed by one or both of them getting kicked out of the Wonderbolts, their lives ruined. It was playing with fire. “Get out there and take some R&R, if you can’t find a date while you’re out you can always return to the mail.” As she gestured to the stack of fan mail, Soarin grimaced. “Well it’s a last resort. Just, be open to the possibility, ok?” Soarin nodded. “In fact I think you have three candidates waiting outside…” Soarin groaned, Spitfire was throwing mares at him already. She guessed how this conversation would go and her powers of prediction were uncanny. As she cantered out she gave a parting shot. “I’ll tell them to wait.” ~~~~~ “Is it here?” Rainbow Dash said breathlessly, her face split by a grin. “Yes it is.” Twilight Sparkle produced the item. Held aloft like a holy relic, the light of the morning sun spilled through the window and framed it perfectly. Its gilt edges caught the light just so. Dash’s heart beat faster and faster. She felt as if she were flying, the item floated closer. She reached out for it. In reality Dash was flying, unconsciously she floated closer to her prize. Abruptly it snapped down to the counter, a dull thud escaping the back cover. Rainbow Dash fell sideways away from the coveted item, a Pink weight pressing her side. “One for you!” Pinkie bounced towards a frightened Twilight Sparkle, “And one for YOU!” Twilight instinctively moved to protect the book from the bouncing Pink missile. She reflexively caught the note Pinkie was forcing on her. Fortunately Pinkie stopped once the note was delivered. “Oh thank you.” Twilight mumbled nervously as she leaned away from Pinkie. Rainbow Dash snapped upright and glared at Pinkie Pie. “What’s the big idea!” Her voice had a sharp edge to it. Pinkie Pie was totally unperturbed. “It’s an invitation to the couples party in three days! And the Wonderbolts are going to be there!” She said with mounting excitement. “I got a few extra invitations because I am throwing the party. It’s going to be so much fun!” Her smile was infectious. It jumped to the other two mares in an instant, although for very different reasons. “I’ll be there.” Rainbow Dash said absent mindedly, still staring at the book. Pinkie Pie bounced out, humming a ditty about delivering invitations. Twilight allowed the eager Rainbow Dash to collect her book. “So who are you going to bring?” Rainbow Dash blinked, the book was already open to the first page. “What?” “For the party.” Twilight said with her head tilted to the side. “Why would I need to bring anypony?” “Well, normally you wouldn’t, but this is a couples party.” Twilight Sparkle looked at the invitation her eyelids drooping as a sigh escaped her. “I don’t know much about dating and I don’t have a special somepony, I guess I’ll have to decline.” “what…what…WHAT?!” Rainbow Dash set her prized novel down and ripped into the invitation. She read it as fast as her budding reading skills would allow. “Why would they make it a couples party!” Her chance at seeing the Wonderbolts again was slipping away and the thought was enough to start a headache creeping up Dash’s neck. “Well the day of the party is also Hearts and Hooves day.” Twilight levitated a book out of a far shelf and cracked the cover. “You know, maybe I will go to the party. I haven’t spent any time studying relationships other than friendship. Maybe now is a good chance to gather some data. Of course I’ll have to get a date first…” She trailed off as she began to read “Romance for young mares.” ”heh…ha ha ha…” Rainbow Dash could not contain all of her laughter. Snickers, smiles, giggles, and more leaked out of her despite her attempts to hide it. “Good luck, egghead.” The sarcasm drew Twilight out of the book. Twilight glared at Dash. She had enough of the teasing and knew Dash wouldn’t back down from a challenge. An idea was forming in her head and a slow smile crept across her face. The challenge would be far too tempting for Dash to resist. “Oh really? Then I have a little bet I’d like to make with you…” “What?” Dash instantly perked up. Gotcha Twilight thought to herself. “I will bet 20 bits I can get a date for this party and you can’t.” Twilight knew it was a win-win situation for her. At best both of them would get dates and there would be plenty of data. At worst she could observe Rainbow Dash and get data on how to start a relationship. And she really did want to go to the party with her friends. “Deal, this is gonna be the easiest 20 bits I’ve ever made.” ~~~~~ Rest and Relaxation. Right. Yesterday his workout included 500 wingups. Something that Soarin always ended up exhausted from and like today, it left him without the use of his wings. It didn’t matter how sore they were, he wouldn’t need to use them today anyway. He knew he would be mobbed wherever he went, and he knew the best way to ward off a mob of fans was to make sure you had a few fans around you and to make it look like they were your entourage. Some subtle cues could even turn them into bodyguards. Rabid, ferocious, foaming at the mouth bodyguards. And he was in luck, a trio of earth mares were waiting outside his hotel room. Spitfire winked at him from afar and closed the door to her own hotel room. Spitfire always tried to do more than be a team leader, she tried to make sure the Wonderbolts had their mental game right. It was something Soarin admired about her, even if she sometimes pushed him to do things he would rather not do. This was one of those times and one of those things. The three mares looked at him, clearly ready to start squealing. Soarin decided to preempt the ‘squee.’ “Say, would you three like to spend the rest of the day with me? I don’t really know my way around town and today is the only R&R I'm really going to get.” SQUEEEEE! Sigh. So much for trying to avoid that, Soarin began to walk towards the lobby and in a flash the trio surrounded him, stars in their eyes. “So what’s a good place to eat around here? I haven’t had anything sweet in a long time and I kinda have a sweet tooth.” “Sugercube Corner!” The one with the rose cutie mark said. “By the way my name is Rose.” “I’m Lily.” “And I’m Daisy.” “Sugercube Corner has the best sweets.” “Will you treat us to it?” “What’s it like flying?” “What kind of mares do you like?” “What kind of sweets do you like? I’ll bet it’s cupcakes!” This sort of questioning was the sort of thing tabloids tended to ask and they were exactly the kind of vapid questions Soarin was very tired of answering. Hearing the same question over and over started to irritate you. But if Soarin wanted his entourage he would have to humor them. He answered their questions the best he could and kept his talking to a minimum. He showed just enough passive interest not to lose them but not enough so they knew he didn’t want to be bothered too much. It was a skill sharpened through trial and error. Today there was not much error. Lily, Daisy, and Rose lead him into town and their proximity was like a magic talisman that warded off all but the most aggressive of fans. Even those fans just wanted an autograph before bowing out to the three lucky mares. Passing through the market Soarin spied an orange mare selling apples, and pie, heavenly pie! She seemed familiar. “Hey, do you think we could get-” They were nearly to a very distinctive building. It looked like a full size gingerbread house, complete with frosting. Soarin could guess this was Sugercube Corner and the trio pulled him inside before he could finish his sentence. There were few customers inside at this time and they all just gazed at the star who just waltzed in. A mint colored unicorn mare waved at him from behind a rack of sweets. The three mares shot daggers into their stares. The smile vanished from her face so fast Soarin wasn’t sure he saw it in the first place. Soarin hated to see that, but it was that or get mobbed. He flashed the mint colored mare a trademark smile when he thought Lily, Daisy, and Rose weren’t looking, it worked. Soarin walked up to the register but didn’t see anypony there. “Excuse me can I get a table for four?” He said loudly hoping the waitress was simply in the back. Instead a pink mare with a mane that looked impossibly fluffy burst from behind the counter. “WELCOME WELCOME WELCOME!” Soarin backpedaled, slipped, and fell onto his haunches. His suave demeanor totally cracked by this…mare. He shook his head to clear the cobwebs out and stood at his full height, trying to regain his composure. “Ah, yes, could I get a table for myself and these three fine young mares.” He gestured and put on his best smile. Soarin figured if he was going to spend the day with the three of them he might as well make them happy. Just don’t get too friendly with one in particular or there will be a ponycide and two mares going to the clink Soarin reminded himself. “Okey Dokey Lokey.” The pink mare said, without pause. She bounced…bounced around the counter and lead the group outside to an empty table. Soarin noticed this was not much of a restaurant but rather a candy shop. So much for lunch, he thought. But at least he would get the chance to check out where the real party would be held. “Are you acting the waitress because I’m a Wonderbolt?” Soarin asked the question with a hint of flirtation. Just the thing to get good service. “Nope, I just want to see you smile.” The pink mare said and bounced back inside. Soarin had the vague feeling he had seen her before. Maybe at the Canterlot wedding? He couldn’t be sure, there was a certain amount of…let’s just say ‘punch’ at that wedding and leave it at that. The three mares almost came to blows over who would go inside and get cupcakes. In the end Lily won out. She returned with four cupcakes, one for each of them, Soarin sighed softly. He actually hated being waited on by fans, especially mares. It made him fell less of a gentle stallion and more like… well, like some puffed up celebrity. She had just set them on the table and turned to retrieve drinks when it began to rain. Not driving rain, but the kind of rain that drips everywhere and gets under your clothes and into your hair. Soarin was almost blinded by the sheets of water and weakening sunlight. The soft patter of rain drops and the splashes of hooves floated into his ears. Several of the locals ran indoors, while his ‘entourage’ got soaked. “So much for R&R.” Soarin blinked and held up a hoof. Nothing. Not a drop, he was totally dry. He looked up and saw a cyan pegasus holding open a small patch of clouds open. The rain neatly missed him and the table but not his temporary companions. He yelled up at her, “I would help you but I’d rather not fly today.” The blue pegasus looked at him with a full smile. “Aren’t you going to stop the rain for everyone else?” He was hoping this was a friendly gesture to another, and not a celebrity special treatment thing. “Oh well, I just wanted…to…uh…” She tried to find an explanation but the hesitation made any further explanation fall flat. I’m just a celebrity that’s too good for a little water. “You should help out everyone.” Soarin secretly wished to relax alone, and didn’t want another tag-a-long. Besides, the three mares with him were getting very wet and it did nothing to improve their disposition. As much as Soarin wanted a little time to himself, he just couldn’t let them suffer like that if he could help it. “Fine…” she sighed and opened the clouds wider. She flew away behind the cloud cover and was lost in an instant. “Thank you…” Soarin’s gratitude was lost on her. She was already far away opening up little patches of clouds saving others from getting soaked. Soarin sighed and bit into his cupcake. It turned out to be very good. It was sweet but slightly spicy, he rather liked it that way. ~~~~~ Twilight put down her book and looked at her schedule. Sigh. Behind schedule again, and the rain outside didn’t help. She had cleared several blocks in her schedule in order to read and pursue her new subject, but could do little more than read while it was raining outside. She was delighted to see the rain had stopped when Pinkie Pie burst in again. “HELP!” “What is it? What’s wrong?” Twilight said, apprehension turning her voice up an octave. “I can’t carry all of the party supplies I need and I can’t find Fluttershy!” Twilight groaned inwardly. She recalled the latest chapter of "Romance for Young Mares" said meeting stallions at their place of business was best as they were more at ease and in their element. Maybe I can do both tasks at once. “Alright I’ll help you, but you have to carry more than just the balloons.” The two cantered, or rather Twilight cantered and Pinkie bounced out of the library and towards the market, the door slamming behind them. The noise awoke the sleeper with a start. He rubbed his eyes, and glanced at his clock. “oh no, I overslept again!” Spike tip toed down stairs. “Twilight? Sorry I overslept.” Silence. A small smile appeared on his face. Sweet. She was out of the library, out of sight and out of mind. He darted towards the closet intending to start in on his chores. Halfway across the library’s main floor he noticed a book sitting open on Twilight’s favorite lectern. “Romance for Young Mares.” He giggled to himself. I wonder what this is doing out here. He closed the book and replaced it on a worn shelf. An open letter was hidden underneath the book and Spike’s curiosity got the better of him. It turned out to be an invitation, combined with the book it did not take much of a detective to put it together. Spike rolled on the floor laughing. Twilight is looking for a special somepony. I wonder who she’s going to get for the party. ~~~~~ Pinkie Pie was looking very carefully. She reached out a hoof but quickly drew it back. No, that one wasn’t right. The hoof slowly scratched her chin. Maybe… “It isn’t a chess move!” Twilight said, they had been standing there for almost twenty minutes. “They’re just balloons. Pick a color, or all of the colors I don’t care anymore!” This little shopping trip was turning out to be a dud. Not only was Pinkie Pie taking an inordinate about of time to choose simple things like a color for the balloons, but the store’s proprietor was a mare. Twilight’s barn door didn’t swing that way. “I’ll have you know that the choice of balloon color is very important to a party.” Pinkie Pie wore a very serious expression at this time. And she was puffing on a pipe Twilight didn’t remember her having only seconds ago. “Indeed, the color of the balloons determines the initial mood the party, and affects the third and fifth party games…” Twilight was quite sure this was not knowledge she wanted to infect herself with. She also guessed that Pinkie Pie was making it all up, but she couldn’t be sure. She sighed and went to the window looking forlornly out at the market square hoping to catch a glimpse of a suitable candidate. Instead she spotted Rainbow Dash trotting up to Rose’s booth. She furiously began taking notes while Pinkie Pie continued on about the importance of confetti. ~~~~~ “Will you be my special-“ the cyan filly started. Her eyes were big and her breath was shallow. Sweat beaded on her back and flank, but she spoke without pause. She didn’t get a chance to finish. “No way! I don’t need cooties!” The colt darted away from her giggling. She felt like a knife was digging into her chest. She didn’t ask again. ~~~~~ Rainbow Dash was in a sour mood as her first attempt for getting a date was shot down before she even started and it brought back painful memories. Soarin would have been a total blowout for her bet, getting a celebrity as your date would be a win for sure. She could see the competition was fierce however and decided to maybe a little scouting was in order. She had cleared the rain but by the time she returned to Sugercube Corner Soarin was long gone. “So I noticed you were talking to one of the Wonderbolts today…” She tried to sound nonchalant. “Where did you meet him?” Rose smiled, but secretly sent psychic death waves at Rainbow Dash. Fortunately for Dash, Rose was devoid of psychic powers. “Well, Lily, Daisy, and I met him after the derby last week. I gave him my best rose today, it’s almost as perfect as he is, don’t you think?” Her voice had a dreamy quality. So he likes Roses, too easy! “They are very, uh, cool roses. I’ll take three.” Dash tried to speak without giving away her thoughts, but perhaps Rose did have psychic powers. “And what pony are these for?” Her voice was slow and flat, her eyes narrowed slightly at Rainbow Dash. Dash gulped a small knot in her throat down. “I’m…uh…hungry…yeah I just wanted a snack.” A smile suddenly appeared on Rainbow Dash’s face that didn’t quite reach her eyes. Rose’s expression didn’t change. “Sure thing, 6 bits.” Rose carefully chose and wrapped three roses. She hoofed them over and slapped the 6 bits offered her into the register with a cha-ching! “Well?” Rose looked at Dash with a small smile on her face. “Aren’t you hungry?” “Oh…of course…” Dash bit into the first rose and instantly regretted it. Pain blossomed in her tongue. ”Ahhhh!” She stuck out her tongue, a single rose thorn sticking out of it. “Oh silly me, how did I miss that?” Rose said with far too much sugar in her voice. “Let me get that for you.” With a swift motion she plucked the thorn out, a bright crimson globule appearing in its place. Rainbow Dash nearly screamed. Instead she snapped her mouth closed, a tear forming at the corner of her eye. Rainbow Dash gave a half smile and darted off before she could get stabbed again. “Enjoy the rest of them.” Rose called after her shrinking form. Once she was out of sight Rose allowed her smile to become truly wicked. That ought to teach her, roses have thorns! ~~~~~ Soarin straightened his jacket, an old tweed number that had seen better days. It had a soft lining made softer by wearing and washing. He finished by donning a dark brown bowler hat. His hope was to avoid attention, but this sort of ploy rarely worked. It was the best he could do however without some new clothes. He exhaled a breath and glanced at the picture on his desk once again, and closed his eyes. ~~~~~ They were seated in a restaurant with velvety seats. The booth was lit by a soft light that did not diffuse well. It created a cone of light on the table and its patrons giving an illusion of privacy. The table was worn but he could still see her reflection in it. Low voices about them chatted in their own private cones of light. He and his date were often the subject of conversations about them, but he took no notice. “I’m allowed to order anything?” He nodded. His brain might as well have been replaced with soft, warm cotton. He tried to say something suave like, “Of course darling, you can have anything you desire.” “Sure thing, whatever you want.” Is what actually came out. It didn’t seem to matter, she smiled at him and when the waiter took her order he had to stop and look at Soarin carefully. Taking in the size of Soarin’s satchel, which was absolutely bulging with bits, he nodded. He returned a short time later with a bottle of some rich wine, which literally cost three times its weight in bits. He hardly tasted it, his eyes fixated on her. There was some small talk but he didn’t remember exactly what was said. Maybe it was the wine. Flash The pop of a camera and the blinding light snapped his attention toward the source of the sound. The camera’s operator had a pencil behind one ear and a notepad behind the other. She peered through the glass pane of the restaurant’s window, the dull light of the far away city lights showing little more than a dark silhouette. There was another pop and flash. Soarin winced as his vision faded and his pupils shrank to pinpricks. All he could see was an afterimage of a photo bulb in the center of his vision. He opened his mouth to say something that he likely would have regretted. She put one hoof under his chin and brought his attention towards her again. His expression softened instantly. Warmth crept up to his cheeks, it seemed to flow from her touch. Swiftly she leaned across the table and kissed him on the mouth. It was shocking, in more ways than one. Electricity shot through every neuron, every blood vessel, and every heartbeat. Every thought was washed away in soft static. More flashes went off unnoticed. “Let’s get a change of scenery.” She breathed in his ear. It sent a little shiver down his neck. They walked out of the restaurant after he left a small fortune with the smiling waiter. They walked down the boulevard, oblivious to the small gang of tabloid journalists who followed at a short distance. They stopped on a bridge overlooking the city. It was breathtaking but he didn’t see the vista. Lights and sounds floated past him. He couldn’t remember how long it had been, or how he had gotten there. He distinctly remembered the hotel door closing behind him. I’m alone in a hotel room with the most gorgeous mare in the world, he thought to himself. The room was lit only by fireflies in a small swarm inside of a lantern near the window. They gave off a soft light that gave the room a dream like quality, or perhaps his memory simply softened things he wasn't focused on. She sat on the bed, knocked off the extra pillows, and beckoned him closer. His mouth was suddenly dry despite all he had to drink this evening. He gulped and walked towards her and sat on the bed next to her, feeling her warmth. She leaned towards him and whispered something into his ear. After that, his head was stuffed to the brim with cotton, and his wings were spread behind him, his every muscle tense like he had been struck by lighting. Every rational thought was washed away in a soft tide. She leaned over and snapped open the latch on the lantern, allowing the half dozen fireflies inside to scatter out the window. The room was engulfed in darkness.