It was a glorious summer day… at least, it was supposed to be. Instead, the town’s weather ponies were frantically trying to create an emergency thunderstorm. Meanwhile, the rest of the town was busy ensuring all the litter and dead trees were cleaned up so they wouldn’t do any damage.
As Apple Peel pulled down dead tree branches the hard way, Rhapsidy was busy advertising the store’s newest line of chainsaws to every pony who passed by. Finally, Apple Peel had had enough. “Consarnit, Rhapsidy, would ya just get busy an’ help me with this?! I’m the one who’s supposed to be lazin’ around!”
“It’s not my fault Mr. Filthy sent me out to sell these on the day of the big storm,” the unicorn protested. “Besides, why do we have to have one in the first place?”
“‘Cause the weather ponies screwed up and dropped our last downpour over Applelicious. They ain’t even s’posed to get any rain on account o’ them bein’ in a designated desert zone an’ all,” the farm pony replied.
Suddenly, the aforementioned storm began, exactly on schedule for once. “Oh no! The display models are going to rust! My boss is SO going to demote me for this…” the white mare complained.
Friendship is Overrated
Episode 8: Observe Before You Rest
“Hey! Get in here!” a voice called out. It was Twilight Novel, inviting them into the warmth of the library. Without hesitation, they hurried into the warmth and dryness of the tree house.
Apple Peel stopped just short of the door and protested, “Hold on; is it really safe to be inside a tree during a storm?”
“Don’t be absurd; this is my home. Main characters’ homes are never hit by lightning,” the purple librarian pointed out.
Satisfied, the earth pony trotted inside, only to be thrown out into the rain once more for not wiping her hooves first. Grumbling, the mare stomped around in a puddle, rinsing the mud off her legs. Now that she was clean, she tried again to enter the library.
Inside, she found Twilight Novel and Rhapsidy covered in goop. “What’s going on here?” she demanded.
“Why, we’re testing beauty product samples!” Twilight answered cheerfully. “It’s part of this thing called a ‘slumber party’. I read about it in a fanfic and thought I’d try it out for myself!”
“Here, try some!” Rhapsidy offered as she sprayed a scent onto the farm mare.
The orange pony gasped in fear. The scent sent her flashing into a memory of her family touring a cosmetics factory. She could still hear the screams as her parents drowned in a vat of perfume… She ran outside to wash the stuff off in the rain. Moments later, a flash of lightning and a clap of thunder appeared. Apple Peel slowly trotted inside again. This time, she was covered in soot due to her singed fur, her mane was standing on end, and she wore an annoyed expression on her face. It shouldn’t require a genius to figure out what happened.
Within moments, Rhapsidy cleaned her up using various items from her Bag of Sample Products™. With a flash, the mascara and other chemicals on their faces vanished as Twilight prepared to move on to the next stage of the party.
“What was the point of all that if’n ya just made it disappear?” Apple Peel inquired.
“Oh, Apple Peel, you simply do not understand the complexities of beauty…” Rhapsidy sighed.
“Whatever,” the orange mare grumbled. “What’s next on the list?”
“Horror films!” Twilight exclaimed. “Well, actually, the reference guide lists a choice of either horror or romance. For some reason, the only romance films in this library are about a vampire/werewolf love triangle, so I believe we can all agree that horror is the better option.”
“Oh, I love that series!” Rhapsidy exclaimed. Suddenly, she felt a shiver creep down her spine. It was the feeling of the author’s respect for her plummeting. She remained quiet as Twilight set up the movie projector and selected the films to watch.
“I-i-is it over?” Apple Peel stuttered, her eyes shut tight and her forelegs wrapped tightly around Rhapsidy, who was in a similar state.
“You girls are wimps,” Twilight scoffed. “Jason Machete is a hydrophobic retard, and Fangy Clawhoof is hilarious!”
“Ain’t it a mite insultin’ ta use the word ‘retard’?” the earth pony protested.
“Only if used incorrectly. Jason Machete actually does have a medical condition that is a form of mental retardation,” Twilight lectured.
“NERD!” a mysterious voice yelled from outside.
Her two companions stared at her in disbelief, surprised by her expertise on the subject. “Yeah, yeah, I can hardly believe it, either,” the unicorn groaned. “Trollestia made me write some essays about him once.” She shivered.
“Whatever is the problem? You can handle the film just fine,” the guest unicorn wondered.
“She gave me that assignment two days after I became her student,” Twi replied.
Apple Peel decided it was a good time to change the subject. “So… what’s next on the list?”
“Next comes the food, followed by Truth or Dare,” their host replied. Right on cue, Scotty brought in a tray full of pizza bagels before heading off to bed.
The trio enjoyed the treats in silence before getting on with the game.
“All right, Rhapsidy, I dare you to give us something expensive from th’ store fer free,” Apple Peed said with a mischievous smile. With a shrug, she pulled an anvil out of her bag and dropped it on the earth pony’s head.
Apple Peel soon regained consciousness and put a bag of ice over the lump on her head. Rhapsidy smiled a grin as mischievous as her friend’s had been earlier. “All right, Apple Peel… My turn.” The earth pony mare gulped at this. “I dare you to go online and say ‘yes’ to a pop-up ad.”
The orange mare stumbled to one of the library’s computers and booted it up…
The sound of the stormy night was pierced with a trio of loud screams of disgust.
“Why the hay did ya want me ta do that?!” Apple Peel demanded.
“I had no idea it would lead to ‘Two Mares, One Trough’!” the white unicorn cried.
“All right, calm down. Let me just fire up a brain bleach spell. After that, I suggest we all hit the hay,” Twilight said firmly.
“What about the mandatory pillow fight?” Apple Peel protested.
“You were sitting on most of my pillows during the horror films and you soiled them all,” Twilight replied. Needless to say, the two guests decided a pillow fight was not such a good idea after all.
Even going to sleep caused a lot of commotion. Apple Peel and Rhapsidy were yelling through the night. Eventually, Twilight Novel had had enough. She sat up and turned on the light with her magic. “All right you two, enough with the…”
The sight before her was… surprising, to say the least. After a long pause, Apple Peel finally managed to say, “…Well, this is… uncomfortable.”
“So let me get this straight,” the purple unicorn began, “You two start rolling in my guest bed, in my bedroom, during my slumber party, and you don’t even invite me?!” The two guest mares blushed and glanced away sheepishly.
“Let us never mention this again,” Rhapisdy suggested.
“Fine. Let’s just get some sleep,” Twilight grunted as she laid down once more and turned off the lights. The other two followed suit. After lying there for a while, the lavender mare whispered, “Rhapsidy?”
“Yes?”
“I never figured you to be a screamer.”
“Shut up.”
Moments later, a lightning bolt thundered just outside, hitting a tree, which made little sense since it was right next to the library, which was a much taller tree, but I digress. The lights came on again as the three mares rushed to the window. Right outside, the tree was teetering precariously and was about to fall on the house next door. “That tree is teetering precariously and is about to fall on the house next door!” Apple Peel exclaimed. That’s what I just said…
Without another thought, she opened the window and shot it with a grapple gun, similar to those seen in spy and Batpony movies. With a sharp tug, she pulled the tree away from the other house- and into the one they were in.
“Nice job, Apple Peel!” Rhapsidy sneered.
“Oh, shut it, will ya?” the orange mare snapped in reply.
“Would you two just shut up and get this tree out of my bedroom?!” their host screamed.
Without needing to be told twice, Rhapsidy immediately fired up the chainsaw she had been advertising at the start of the episode. She cut the branches down to size while Apple Peel hauled the sections over to the window and tossed them out. Meanwhile, Twilight Novel grabbed a needle and surgical sutures and stitched shut the gashes that were cut open whenever Rhapsidy’s chainsaw came in contact with Apple Peel. When they were done, the earth pony bore a strong resemblance to Friendlyspine’s monster. Exhausted, the three mares climbed into bed again and fell asleep almost instantly.
Today’s Moral: Apparently, when I was avoiding all those slumber parties as a child, I wasn’t missing a thing.