Guardians of Magic

by Shire Folk

The Many Wonderful Wonders and Ponies of Ponyville, Part 1

Okay, so some of you may have heard them already, but Siluca has been doing audio readings of Guardians of Magic. I have joined him a few times since he began, and they’re a blast. Granted, the ones I’m in take longer because we get off-topic a few times, but they’re well worth listening to.

Now, on with the fic!

Disclaimer: Nappa: “Vegeta! Look, a disclaimer! What’s that for?”

Vegeta: “That’s to show that the author doesn’t own anything, Nappa, like My Little Pony or a bunch of tree-hugging racoons.”

Nappa: “Oh, so he’s poor, right?”

Vegeta: “He wouldn’t be if he came up with an original idea for once.”

        Lightning flashed behind the foreboding form of an ancient castle. The stones that had been laid down in its construction centuries before had cracked and weathered from age; proper maintenance and care would have been likely if the groundskeepers hadn’t died two hundred years ago and the masons of the region put to death for demanding a fair price for restorative work.

        Inside, however, the occupants of the castle didn’t care that the fortifications were falling into a crumbling state of disrepair. Fires roared within the feasting hall, and jovial music echoed from the hall into numerous corridors until finally fading into silence. Four dancing girls entertained a hundred and fifty men, the men dressed in leathers and animal skins. On the shoulders of some of the men rested spiked iron pauldrons, while more wore helmets (many bearing horns). A few carried sheathed or belted weapons, but the majority of their arms lay stacked against the walls: large battleaxes, spears, halberds, maces, and hammers. Hounds that looked more like tamed wolves slobbered over bones off to the side, or rested contentedly beneath tables while waiting for scraps. Against one wall, and chained to a post buried in the masonry of the floor, perched two two-legged dragons, each fifteen feet long without including their tails, leering at the raucous crowd.

        One man cooed enticingly at a dancing girl close to him, an enticing beauty garbed in flashy red-dyed garments accented by golden jewelry and breasts alluring enough to attract the eyes of most men. “Give us a smile, love, and I’ll die a ‘appy man!” She obliged him, smiling sweetly before giving him a quick bop on his head with the tambourine she was fiddling with. Her hips gyrated as her quick feet carried her along the table-top, nimbly stepping around any flask or plate in her path, utilizing the sashes tied around her wrists to briefly conceal and reveal her face to the men, showcasing the briefest of sly winks.

        Her smile dropped quickly, however, as she felt a hand grasp at her ankle. It was green, somewhat clawed, and belonged to a tiny goblinoid creature with a pronounced hunch that was always seen wearing a purple cloak over a brown tunic. She kicked at the hand and snarled, “Away with you, Creeper!” The creature fell to the floor, or would have if a large, meaty, hand hadn’t managed to grab it by the leg. The arm that bore the hand brought Creeper up to face the face that was connected to the neck attached to the body that had the arm growing out of it, except Creeper was hanging from his foot and so peered quite nervously into the scowling face of the man (whose lack of dental hygiene was evident) while upside down.

        “Didn’t you hear her?” the man jeered. “Get lost!” With a mighty throw, he hurled Creeper clear across the room, inciting laughter from many of his compatriots as the goblinoid henchman flew as well as a dodo until it crashed into a set of stone steps.

        The laughter abruptly ceased as a loud sound the men still hadn’t become accustomed to stormed into their ears. A whorl of thick black and purple mist appeared on the stairs close to where Creeper had fallen, increasing in size until it was an inky oval of darkness tall enough for a large man to stride through. Instead of a man emerged a mouse, though he still stood tall enough to rub shoulders with the more average-sized warriors in the hall. The mouse chuckled to himself while twirling some kind of device in his hand.

        “No need to stop on my account, boys,” he said with an easy smile, “just go back to your wine and women, and save some for me this time will ya? Got a present to deliver to the boss, and he’s sure to like it.” Roughly two dozen men cheered while others raised mugs of ale and goblets of wine in his direction, and Mortimer nodded his head and turned, beginning to skip away with a faint, “Ha-cha-cha!” to himself.

        Creeper had regained his footing and hobbled and hopped quickly after Mortimer, a pleased smile on his face. “S—so you found it, then?” he asked rhetorically before cackling. “The Master will be so, so very pleased with our success. I know he will!”

        “I’m sure hoping he will,” Mortimer answered, still smiling confidently. “With this little baby we can go anywhere, not just to the places we know of or wherever the dark corridors feel like taking us to. And besides,” the machine gave a ping, and Mortimer removed a muffin from the device’s rear, “this thing makes great muffins.”

        Creeper cackled excitedly and hurried onward, urging Mortimer to follow at greater speed while the lanky mouse munched on his muffin. Eventually the pair came to a chamber, and Creeper enthusiastically knocked on the door several times before pushing it open. “S—s—sire! We found it!” He clapped to himself as Mortimer walked in through the open portal. “Look, sire! The duck’s portal device! We’re sure to find them now!”

        Inside of the chamber rested very little of material worth; the cracked stones that created a short stair to a dais and broken throne were the only dull feature of the of the equally sombre room. Several figures stood within the room, while only one sat upon the throne. The sitting one wore long mauve robes and a shawl of black fur across his shoulders. From the hood that covered his head protruded green horns that matched the colour of his clawed hands. Malevolent eyes leered at the Creeper from underneath the hood, and the Horned King turned his attention to Mortimer.

        “You have retrieved the item?” he asked, his voice a dark and low rumble, creaking like the swinging from the gallows.

        “You bet your uncle I did,” Mortimer announced, twirling the portal gun around his finger. “Had to ruffle a few feathers and singe some whiskers first, but it’s all ours, and works like a charm. Even sent those kiddos with the Keyblades packing with one zap.” He raised the business end of the device to his mouth, and blew an imaginary waft of smoke away.

        “Where did you send them to?” asked a large man in a green trench coat who stood close to the Horned King. His hair was cut flat, sunglasses obscured his eyes, and just looking at him was enough to know that he was packing serious muscle underneath his skin. On his shoulder was perched a much smaller man, this one thin and gaunt-looking with a mop of grey hair. Give him two years of non-stop activity under the sun and he might just pass for being colourful enough to be a basement recluse.

        “Not a clue,” admitted Mortimer nonchalantly. “Haven’t really figured the device out yet, so I’m pretty sure it’s got a randomized setting on it.”

        “Give it here,” another person, this one with an upward plume of orange hair wearing a mask and a suit with a capital ‘S’ on it, told him. “I’ll figure it out.”

        “I highly doubt that,” said another crisply, the speaker smartly dressed and with a powdered wig.

        “Doubt what you will,” the masked man answered him, “but I’ve invented things far more sophisticated than those cannons you have your goons play with.”

        “Your arguing is annoying,” another burly fighter snapped, the man dressed all in black and bearing a strange combination of dark skin and short red hair. “What are we supposed to do with it? It doesn’t look anything like the Cauldron.”

        “Astute powers of observation, Ganondorf,” the man with the ‘S’ on his chest laughed.

        Creeper raised a fist and rushed towards Ganondorf. “How dare you insult your liege! Bow before His Majesty, immedia—!” Ganondorf’s hand was suddenly around Creeper’s neck, clenching tightly and choking the life out of him. Creeper’s eyes bulged and he squirmed, straining to break free or draw breath, and failing on both counts. He struggled helplessly for nigh on eight seconds before Ganondorf roared and hurled the tiny goblin at the wall.

        The Horned King’s voice echoed throughout the chamber and rattled the ears of his assembled minions. “We shall use the device to capture the one who knows where the Keepers reside.”

        “And how do we know who that is?” Ganondorf growled.

        The Horned King placed his skeletal clawed hands together. “The girl’s bauble could not tell us, but there is an oracular pig here, on this world, that we could use to locate the one.”

        “Why not simply use the pig to locate the cauldron you seek?” asked the man in the wig.

        “I have considered this course, but there are more artefacts of power than just the Black Cauldron. With the six Keepers, I need not search for the Black Cauldron even in the place where it is hidden; with the Keepers, it can be brought right to me, and anything else. Nothing will stand in my way to conquer all there is, not even Kingdom Hearts.”

        Far beneath the chamber, a girl with long blonde hair and light blue eyes curled her head into her two-layered dress as an orb of golden light flew around the cell she was in. Her shoulders shuddered as unwanted sobs left her mouth and tears flowed into the pink skirt of her dress.

        Kairi woke up to her shoulder being rubbed. She smiled slightly, feeling Sora’s hoof against her, and sighed. “Alright, alright, Sora, I’ll get up.” She had barely finished speaking when a yawn shoved its way past her teeth with the force of a locomotive. “And I was having such a good dream too. Darkness beyond twilight…I want to learn that spell so bad.” Chuckles near her brought her closer to the land of the living.

        “Sorry Kairi, but Sora’s not here right now,” Rainbow Dash told her. “He’s off with Twilight.”

        Kairi blinked several times as she lifted her head from where she’d been lying down. “He’s with Twilight?” she asked. Rolling her neck and shoulders to get a few of the kinks out of them, she continued, “Why’s he with Twilight? What are they up to?”

        “She wanted to examine the magic around your wings,” Trixie answered. “The way she described it makes its existence very intriguing, and Trixie wouldn’t mind an explanation herself.” Kairi blinked at Trixie, and then turned to Riku. She opened her mouth.

        “Soowah ahn I af mahic awound our wings?” she asked, suddenly trying to talk through a yawn.

        Riku nodded his head, not hiding his smile. “Yeah, you guys do. Some freaky sort of harmonious magic or something. Twilight Sparkle’s going ballistic trying to figure it out. Did you two meet the god of chaos last night while you were having your date in the sculpture garden?”

        “Yeah, we did,” Kairi answered lightly. She looked out the window, noticing that the train was no longer moving. “Are we here already?”

        “Wait a moment,” Applejack said, “are you tellin’ us that y’all met Discord last night?”

        “Yes,” Kairi told her. “He’s still a stone statue, and he spoke into our minds, but he just wanted to chat.”

        “Discord just wanted to chat?” Pinkie Pie asked, frowning and sharing a look with Rainbow Dash.

        “Apparently he’s really, really, bored as a statue,” Kairi supplied.

        “What was he like?” Rei asked. Kairi thought about it for a moment.

        “For being a spirit of chaos and disharmony he was surprisingly well-grounded.”

        “Enough chit-chat about chit-chatting with Discord,” Pinkie Pie announced. She stood up on her hind legs. “We’ve got to go get Sora and Twilight so we can give you guys a grand tour of Ponyville so we can party!”

        Kairi chuckled inwardly and followed Pinkie Pie as she led the way down the car towards another, presumably where Sora and Twilight had gone. The pink party pony opened the door and stepped back with a flourish of her hoof and slight bow of her head, allowing Kairi to be the first one into the car, and what the pegasus saw made her stop dead in her tracks.

        She could feel Naminé’s shock as her Nobody mentally rubbed her ‘eyes’ while Kairi still maintained control of their body. Well, the blonde said from within, we’re certainly awake now.

        Sora was right-side up in the centre of the car, his face blushing profusely and eyes glued to his right wing while ropes covered in magenta light were tied to his four legs, leaving him suspended in the middle of the car. Four more ropes were looped around his barrel, each anchored to a different seat and already taut, preventing him from ascending. Standing next to him, with one of his wings in her hooves, was Twilight Sparkle, and the unicorn’s horn was radiating with the same magenta glow that encased the levitating ropes and Sora’s wing.

        Poomf!

        Kairi glanced back at her wings in confusion for a brief moment as they both spread to their fullest extent, and then quickly turned her attention to Twilight and Sora. It took her a moment to articulate her thoughts while her eyes couldn’t keep from staring at the sight of Sora all tied up. “W—what are you doing?”

        “Studying the magic around his wings,” Twilight answered simply, running her hooves up and down the leading edge of Sora’s right wing while sending a quick jolt of magic into it from her horn. Sora’s shoulders shuddered and his chocolate brown tail swished back and forth. His cerulean eyes sought Kairi’s indigo ones with frantic pleading.

        “Kairi, please, please help me! I don’t know what she’s doing to me!”

        “Hey, what’s going on in there?” Rainbow Dash asked from behind Kairi, trying to see past the pink pegasus. “And what’s up with the spread, Kairi?” Rainbow Dash took into the air and peered over Kairi’s shoulders for a moment. She started to laugh. A snigger at first, quickly building into an uproarious bout of unrestrained mirth while rolling on the floor.

        “What’s so funny?” Kairi demanded, turning around to snort at the other pegasus pony.

        Rainbow Dash weakly raised a hoof and gestured in Sora’s direction, failing to restrain her uncouth snorts. “H—hey! Sora! You better make sure you have some…some rope in the bedroom; your marefriend likes it!”

        Kairi’s face steamrolled through eleven shades of pink, which was quite a feat considering her coat colour, and she whirled back and forth between Sora and Rainbow Dash. However, as her wings were still fully erect, the mare’s erratic movement only served to unbalance her even with four hooves grounding her, and Kairi toppled to the floor in a dizzy heap. The display only made Rainbow Dash laugh even harder until they came out soundlessly, the pegasus pounding on the floor while struggling to draw breath so she could vocalize her amusement. Pinkie Pie was right next to her, finding the entire event hilarious.

        Riku, while not completely understanding, turned to Trixie and Fluttershy while catching a peek of the tied-up Sora and purple unicorn thoroughly engaged in ‘Science Mode’. He shifted his head in Kairi’s direction. “As amusing as the knowledge of Kairi’s kink is, how’d Dash figure it out?”

        Fluttershy’s face blossomed with red. “Oh, um…you see, well…with pegasi we, uh…ooh I just can’t say it!” The butter-yellow pegasus turned tail and fled, her own wings unfurling as she galloped to the doors. She opened them and took flight in a rare variation of her standard method of running away.

        Recognizing a bust when he saw it, he turned to Trixie. “So?” It was quite vexing that all the ponies around him continued to blush and dance around the subject.

        “T—there are some secrets that a mare just doesn’t reveal, Riku,” Trixie told him, frantically avoiding eye contact with the male unicorn. He noticed that her horn was giving off a very faint violet glow while she turned and scarpered after Fluttershy.

        “Riku!” Rei whined. “What’s going on?”

        “I don’t know!” he answered sharply. “These ponies are crazy and none are giving me a straight answer.”

        “Rei? Rei!” Sora screamed. “Code Charlie Foxtrot! Code Charlie Foxtrot!!”

        The filly’s eyes lit up like she’d just been told Christmas was tomorrow and she was getting a pony. “On it, onii-chan Hoshisho-sensei!” Leaping onto Kairi’s beret atop the pegasus’ still somewhat dizzy and flushed face, Rei bolted into the car Sora was being restrained within. Rei rose onto her hind legs and Thunderbell burst into her forehooves in a flash of light. The filly jumped; roaring and exuding cuteness as she raised her weapon above her head. She brought Thunderbell down, the Keyblade slicing through one of Twilight’s magicked ropes. Sora’s left foreleg dropped and his whole side tilted, one of his legs finally freed from being suspended. Twilight gasped as Rei quickly cut the rest of the bonds on Sora’s left side, making him half-sprawl on the floor while his right side tilted upwards.

        “Rei what are you doing?” gasped Twilight. Sora flexed his right wing out of the unicorn’s hooves and flicked her horn with it. Twilight winced and the glow around his wing and the other ropes vanished. The Keyblade-toting filly quickly sliced them off of her older brother, and Sora flexed his wings and scooped the foal onto his back.

        “Abandon train!” he ordered, grinning, before surging towards the open doors like the wind. Rei laughed and held her Keyblade aloft in front of Sora, like she was riding a great and powerful winged steed into glorious battle.

        “Wait! Come back! I’m not done studying your wings yet!” Twilight called in despair as Sora and Rei whooshed over the heads of the other ponies and escaped. Celestia’s student watched them go with a stunned expression on her face for a few seconds before her eyes settled on Kairi.

        The pegasus almost tripped over her own hooves and nearly ran over Rainbow Dash as she hastily copied her coltfriend.

        “Well, that idea—OW—was a total bust,” Scootaloo lamented, wincing as soap suds got into the cut on her cheek.

        “Somehow ah don’t think ‘Cutie Mark Crusaders Cat Catchers’ is really something we were meant tah be,” Apple Bloom agreed, lathering her mane with shampoo while she hovered over the water tub. Hopefully she’d be able to get all the tree sap out this time, so she wouldn’t wake up with a terribly tangled mane in the morning.

        “Especially when the cat in question is Opal,” Sweetie Belle added, giving the prissy white feline a heated glare. Opal hissed, then regally walked past the three fillies as though she owned all of Ponyville and returned to Carousel Boutique through her flap, giving the three an obnoxious salute with her tail before vanishing.

        “Uugh! Why did she even go into the tree anyway?” Scootaloo asked, trying to melt the door with her gaze before returning it to her two friends, all three of the Cutie Mark Crusaders washing the dirt, blood, and tree sap from their manes, tails, and coats. “I swear, your sister really needs to get that cat declawed, Sweetie Belle.” Sweetie Belle sighed.

        “Rarity would never allow it,” the white unicorn filly answered glumly, blindly reaching for something to dry her eyes with. “Opal actually uses her claws to help Rarity when she’s in a pinch, and Fluttershy would definitely put her hoof down if she thought Rarity was going to do something that would hurt Opal in any way.” Still searching, Apple Bloom finally hoofed her a towel.

        “So what are we gonna try now?” the earth pony asked when all three Crusaders were finished washing and drying. “Ah feel like we’ve gone and tried just about everything to get our cutie marks.”

        “What about hockey?” Scootaloo piped up.

       “You have sticks, helmets, and pads, or the bits for them?” Sweetie Belle asked. Scootaloo hung her head.

        “No…”

        “Bobsledding?” Apple Bloom wondered.

        “Know where we can get a sled, about two kilotrots of track, and the equipment to keep it freezing?” Scootaloo asked her. Apple Bloom sighed. This continued for about ten minutes as the three fillies slowly ambled aimlessly down the street, each one of them voicing an idea before another one shot it down for its immediate impossible feasibility. This morning was a winter-sport themed morning for no rhyme or reason, thus making many of the ideas they bounced back and forth for crusading moot for another few months.

        “Why don’t we try bowling again?” Sweetie Belle proposed, smiling a little.

        “Bowling?” Scootaloo gave the unicorn an ‘are-you-crazy’ look. “Don’t you remember what happened last time? Mr. Kingpin won’t let me within twenty hooves of the lanes or balls.”

        “Yeah, in ten-pin bowling,” Sweetie Belle answered with a bright smile, “but I saw a flyer in town square advertising a new five-pin bowling alley. Mrs. Chop recently opened it.”

        Scootaloo’s brain stopped momentarily at Sweetie Belle’s announcement. “Five-pin bowling?” Sweetie Belle nodded.

        “Yep,” she answered. “I overheard Dinky talking about it the other day; her mom had to deliver a bunch of packages to the alley. Apparently they play it a lot in Caneighda.”

        “Caneighda?” Scootaloo asked. “Are you making that up?”

        “No! It’s that country way up north in the Great Tundra where the caribou and reindeer live!”

        Apple Bloom’s eyes had widened in amazement. For something that she regarded (with an understandable amount of disdain given her lack of ability at it) as something that could simply be done on a lazy afternoon to pass the time to actually be a deal in another country was something of a shock to the filly. She shook her head, and adopted a smile. “Well, ah suppose since it’s a different kind o’ bowlin’, that it might be fun.” She turned her head to Scootaloo.

        Seeing that she was outnumbered, Scootaloo decided to go along with it. Perhaps she wouldn’t get banned from this alley. “Why not? Let’s do it!” She lifted her hoof into the air, prompting the other two to raise their own, and the three fillies leapt into the air to perform their signature three-way high-hoof.

        “CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS FIVE-PIN BOWLERS! YAY!”

        “Now you promise that you aren’t going to go all psycho on us this time?” Sora asked nervously, his hooves stammering on the Ponyville platform as the train left town for parts unknown that he really didn’t care about at the moment. All he knew was that now he was stuck in this town with this crazy, and potentially very powerful, unicorn who had just tied him up in order to study him.

        He was sincerely hoping that he wouldn’t end up on somebody’s dissection table by the end of this adventure. Doctor Finklestein in Halloween Town was bad enough. Note to self: do not introduce Twilight Sparkle to Doctor Finklestein. The Realm of Light will cease to exist.

Very slowly, Twilight Sparkle nodded her head, under the draconian scrutiny of her friends. “Yes, I promise that I will not chase, capture, and tie you or Kairi down in order to study your wings, even if the magic surrounding them is driving me up the wall.”

        “Great,” Rainbow Dash said, “now that that’s settled…” She looked up into the sky, and saw a great many clouds floating around and a definite lack of pegasi doing anything with or about them. She sighed in frustration. “I’ve got to go talk to somepony about doing his job. Lazy Thunderlane!” She took off into the sky, stopped, and flew back until she was hovering just a short distance away. “Don’t worry, I’m still going to help you guys search the town for this keyhole thingy, but I’ve gotta take care of this first.”

        “It’s okay, Rainbow,” Twilight said, “you’re allowed to take pride in your job once in a while.”

        “Yeah, well, managing the weather may not be the most glamorous job, but it pays the bills and it keeps me flying,” she answered. “Plus,” Rainbow added while doing a few loops, “it gives me plenty of practice time for the Wonderbolts.” She proceeded to finish her fourth loop before winging it off to skies known.

        “Right then,” Twilight said, turning back to look at the four Keyblade Wielding ponies, “shall we get started?”

        “Sure,” Sora said, looking around for a moment before motioning for her to lead the way. “What are the Wonderbolts?”

        “They’re a performance team of the best fliers in Equestria,” Fluttershy answered. “Rainbow Dash has been practicing to get a tryout for them since she was a filly. I think she’s really close too, especially after last year’s ‘Best Young Flier’ competition.”

        “Well, we’ll know fer sure when she gets a letter from ‘em,” Applejack said. “But until then, Rainbow’s staying where she is; spendin’ thirty minutes managing the weather, two hours nappin’ in my orchard, and nine hours practicin’ on a crummy day.”

        “How do you know that?” Riku asked. Applejack laughed.

        “With the number o’ times she’s crashed into mah barn roof trying out some newfangled trick o’ hers and messin’ it up, she’s told me about her days a time or two,” came the honest answer.

        Pinkie Pie took off into the front of the pack, excitedly jabbering about the town and everything within sight. Kairi was only able to pay attention to her for a half-minute, tops, before interest in what the pink party pony was saying waned in favour of something else. Trixie appeared to be uncomfortable, and was staying particularly close to Twilight Sparkle.

        Kairi slowed her pace down while Pinkie pointed out a store called ‘Quills and Sofas’ that apparently only sold quills and sofas (how they stayed in business when those were their only products mystified her; surely they had to also sell ink and parchment to go with the quills, right?), and came alongside Trixie. “Hey, you okay?”

        Trixie jumped at the question, but quickly turned her eyes away from Kairi. “What? Of course Trixie is fine! Why wouldn’t she be? It’s not like she’s in a town she was once chased out of or anything.”

        Kairi narrowed her eyes. “That was a suspiciously specific denial.”

        Twilight looked at Trixie in concern. “Trixie, it will be okay, you’ll see. It wasn’t your fault that that Ursa Minor got cranky and tore through here.”

        “Yes, but the common pony isn’t about to place all the blame on a couple of impressionable young colts, are they?” Trixie countered. “They’ll see the Great and Powerful Trixie as the cause of their woes.”

        “Even so,” Twilight argued firmly, “I won’t put up with anypony badmouthing my friends.”

        Trixie didn’t know how much good the librarian’s word would do.

        “Out, now.”

        The door slammed behind the three fillies, one angry unicorn having gone back inside of her bowling alley.

        “Nice goin’ Scootaloo,” Apple Bloom shot.

        “Hey! It’s not my fault that that middle pin insulted me for always missing it!” Scootaloo fired back.

        Sweetie Belle sighed. “I guess bowling really isn’t our special talent,” she lamented, “even five-pin bowling with enchanted pins.”

        “It was kinda funny how the pins talked,” Apple Bloom mentioned, trying to cheer them up a little. Scootaloo giggled.

        “Hey, do you two think that my special talent might really be demolition?” she asked.

        “Ah don’t know Scootaloo,” Apple Bloom said, “but Ah don’t think it’d be a good idea for us to go around being Cutie Mark Crusader Dynamite Demolishers.”

        “Well, what do you think we should do now?” Sweetie Belle asked.

        “I dunno,” Scootaloo answered. “I’m all out of ideas right now.”

        “Why don’t we go to Sugarcube Corner and get a few cupcakes?” Apple Bloom suggested. “That should cheer us up, an’ we can always do more crusading tomorrow.”

        “Sure,” Sweetie Belle chirped up, a smile working its way back onto her face. Apple Bloom looked at Scootaloo, and the pegasus filly nodded her head brightly.

        “Alright, Sugarcube Corner it is,” Apple Bloom declared.

        Trixie shifted nervously as she slowly walked in the middle of their group. She tightened her cloak around her body, eyes darting warily about the street. Ponyville wasn’t the only town that had reacted unfavourably to her boasting and bragging. Several had even received her show well. Although, one other town had also had another unicorn that had actually upstaged her. Being chased out of town had never been a pleasant experience, and twice she’d accidentally stumbled back into one she’d been run out of before.

        Those hadn’t been very good days. At least she still had her cart back then, so she was able to wash the tomatoes from her mane.

        However, as Trixie recalled, Ponyville for the majority had been fairly receptive of her; it was simply that she had high-tailed it out after Twilight Sparkle had vanquished the Ursa Minor those two foolish colts had foalishly disturbed in an attempt to get her to prove her boasting.

        Actually, now that she looked around…

        “I can’t even tell that an Ursa Minor ever went through here,” Trixie whispered, somewhat in awe.

        Applejack chuckled. “Well, that’s Ponyville for yah. Everypony pitches in an’ helps out when things get a little rough. That little Ursa rampage back then was nothing compared tah some of the other things we’ve had to deal with, trust me.”

        “Like what?” Trixie asked. “What could possibly have been worse to the town than a wild and cranky Ursa?”

        “Try an invasion of parasprites,” Pinkie Pie answered.

        “That I then charm to not eat food,” added Twilight with a wince, “which then caused them to eat everything that wasn’t ‘food’. They ate over half the town before Pinkie Pie led them away. And the worst part was that Princess Celestia was scheduled to visit that day. Fortunately she had to go to Fillydelphia to deal with an emergency ‘infestation’, so we were spared her discovering that Ponyville was in ruins, although that didn’t stay secret for long. Her Majesty’s government has a way of finding out things that happen just down in the Equus Valley.”

        “She’s got a close enough eye on us too,” Spike chatted, “what with you being here and all, Twilight.”

        Twilight smiled and rolled her eyes before waving to one of the royal guards that had been sent to patrol Ponyville in the event of Heartless appearing. Sometimes it was a hassle being the Princess’ protégé.

        “Hi Lyra! Hi Bon Bon!” Pinkie Pie shouted, waving a hoof at a mint-green unicorn and a cream-coloured earth pony. Trixie purposely placed herself further behind the other ponies of the group, watching as the pair of ponies waved back and began trotting over. It didn’t look like they had spotted her yet.

        “Hi Pinkie Pie, Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Spike,” the unicorn greeted, coming to a stop a friendly distance of a few hooves away with the earth pony ceasing just slightly behind and beside her. Fortunately, as far as Trixie was concerned, she hadn’t been spotted yet. “Elements out, huh? I know I’ll sleep safer tonight with you girls and the Royal Guards on the job.”

        “Thanks Lyra,” Twilight said. “Although, I heard that Ponyville hasn’t seen much of any trouble.”

        “I know that we haven’t seen any of the shadowy things the guards were warning us all about,” said the earth pony, “but it’s still gotten all of us rattled.” Fluttershy and Applejack both nodded.

        “We’ve seen ‘em in Canterlot,” Applejack said, “an’ let me tell yah, they sure ain’t a pretty sight.”

        Lyra shook her head and brought up a smile. “Well, enough about that,” she announced, her tone brightening considerably. “You guys are new here, right? I don’t think we’ve met before. I’m Lyra Heartstrings, and this is Bon Bon. What are your names, and who’s this adorable little filly here?” She bent her neck down and peered right at Rei with a big smile on her face.

        Rei rolled her eyes and sighed through a smile. Everything was cute in this world, even the train, so it only went without saying that she was the cutest thing in all of creation (however, she reserved the right to make an adjustment to that claim upon being shown a newborn foal). Drawing attention to it was just a teensy weensy bit pointless. There was no need for these random ponies to say it, even though it was nice to hear.

        “Hi,” Kairi answered pleasantly. “I’m Kairi; this is Sora, and Riku, and the cute little gumdrop here is Rei.” The filly exaggerated a bow, drawing out a giggle from both Ponyville residents and off-worlders alike. “It’s nice to meet you, Lyra Heartstrings, Bon Bon.” Kairi held her hoof out to both of the ponies, shaking hooves with the unicorn and earth pony.

        “Actually, you can just call Lyra by her first name, everypony does,” Bon Bon said midway through shaking Riku’s hoof in greeting. She glanced between a smiling Riku and Kairi and then looked down at Rei before looking up at the grown pegasus and unicorn again. “Is she yours?”

        “Yeppers,” Rei said innocently with a big smile. “I’m with them.”

        “And you already have your cutie mark!” Lyra gushed while Kairi and Riku glanced at one another quizzically. “You’re such a special little unicorn. I’m sure you two are very proud.”

        Kairi’s eyes zeroed in on Riku’s horn, and it clicked. Having no prior knowledge of magical talking pony biology and breeding patterns, she had been a little slow on the uptake, but at last she had muddled her way through it as far as she was concerned. Riku was the only unicorn of their group, and he was male. Sora was a fellow pegasus pony, and thereby the chances of a pegasus/pegasus union producing a unicorn were likely far slimmer than a pegasus/unicorn pairing.

        Her face flushed red in embarrassment at what Lyra, Bon Bon, and innocent little Rei, had hinted at. Upon her blush, Riku’s own cheeks coloured as he likely came to the same conclusion. Rei peered queerly at their faces, and tilted her head. “Huh?”

        Sora’s hooves flew to his mouth to prevent the laughter from escaping, while snorts and titters came from Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Twilight. Their embarrassment and the insinuation hadn’t quite hit Fluttershy yet, evident by the words that next left her mouth. “Riku? Kairi? Are you both feeling alright? Your faces are turning so red that one of my cardinals would be jealous. You haven’t suddenly come down with a fever, have you?”

        Kairi shook her head, and her cheeks went from a bright red to a darker one as even more blood showed from underneath her pink coat. Riku coughed in what he likely hoped to be a polite manner, and spoke firmly. “Uh, no. NO! She’s—I mean…There’s a misunderstanding. Rei is not our foal.”

        “Rei is my little sister,” Sora chortled, unable to stop himself. Kairi shot him a dirty look and sent an elbow to his ribs, which he ignored. “And Kairi’s my marefriend.”

        “Oh, I’m sorry!” Lyra hastily apologized, instantly looking just as embarrassed for putting Riku and Kairi through that as they had been in the moment. “We had just thought…” she trailed off, and Rei suddenly spun around, violet eyes as wide as dinner plates.

        “Wait! You thought that I was—? That they were my mom and dad? But they’d have to be a lot older and that would mean that they would have had to have, that they had…oh EEWWW!” The filly closed her eyes and made a retching noise towards the ground, but it was no use. The closure of her only source of visual stimulation permitted her imagination to create a scene that her eyes would never witness. Cognitive process ground to a halt in the filly’s head, all functions locked around that series of images strung together that her imagination had conjured. She made the mistake of instinctively screwing her eyes shut even tighter and screamed as they became the entirety of all things in the visual spectrum.

        It was horrifying!

        “GAK! EWW! GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT!” the filly screamed, running wildly in circles with closed eyes and trying to banish the image from her mind without success. Perhaps screaming louder would work. “OUT OF MY HEAD! OUT OF MY HEAD! GO! SHOO! BAD IMAGINATION! BAD, BAD IMAGINATION! I DON’T WANT TO THINK OF KAIRI AND RIKU DOING THAAAAAT! GAK! BAD BRAIN, STOP MAKING PICTURES THAT GRAPHIC! WAIT! That means that Mom and Dad. Mom and Dad did…EEEEEEEEEEEEEE! OW! OW! OW, MY BRAIN! IT HURTS! BRAIN BLEACH! ONII-CHAN I NEED BRAIN BLEACH!!”

        By now everypony was on the ground, howling uproariously in laughter at the filly’s uncontrolled antics and awed at her lung capacity to keep screaming. She suddenly gasped as another thought struck her and her eyes snapped open. She fixed her brother with a glare so shocked and livid that it was even more comical considering that she was firmly entrenched in freak-out. “YOU! You filthy, disgusting pig! You want to do that to Kairi!” She leapt onto Kairi and hugged her tightly around the neck, noticing that the wings of every pegasus present, including Fluttershy, were fully extended, and the horns of the unicorns were emitting a very faint glow, with not a whit of a blush occurring because their faces were already red from laughing so hard. “No! I won’t let you defile Kairi like that!”

        Clearly she doesn’t know your mind, Naminé whispered to Kairi.

        Sora rose weakly to his knees, since that was as far as he could get before he would inevitably fall down laughing again. “R—Rei, you’re only ten! How do you even know about that sort of stuff?”

        “I saw two gazelles doing it in the Pride Lands and asked Nala about it because I knew you wouldn’t tell me,” Rei answered, raising her nose into the air and speaking as though her older brother and master was beneath her. “And I can’t believe that you would want to do that with Kairi!”

        “We already decided that we were going to have seven kids Rei,” Kairi said with a grin sent towards the filly grasping her neck. “That means that I’m gonna want to do it with him many more times than one.”

        “And like you said,” Riku added as Rei gaped at the pink pegasus, completely at a loss for words, “your parents did it. And you have a brother, so they must have done it more th—”

        Whatever Riku would have said afterwards was drowned out by Rei’s agonized scream. She clapped her hooves up to her ears and screamed to the heavens in denial of the thought of her parents doing something so lewd and utterly disgusting, not just once, but twice! Dropping her hooves from her ears, she scrambled off of Kairi and bolted, running into Trixie and knocking the azure unicorn down before making her exit with a contrail of dust and high-pitched lungs screaming in denial and the need for air.

        The laughter continued for a good minute before it died down enough for Riku to give Sora an interested look involving a raised eyebrow. “Seven kids?” He barked another laugh and almost fell back into hysteria before he gave Kairi the same look. “Seven pregnancies? You guys are masochists, you know that?”

        Kairi smirked. “He’s fine with five fillies as long as he gets two colts,” she flicked his nose with her tail. “Isn’t that right, Sora? You’re going to give me five beautiful little fillies, aren’t you?” He groaned and turned his eyes skyward, silently asking the gods why he’d ever let that comment slip from his lips.

        “Ooh! Ooh!” Pinkie cried, bouncing up and down and waving her hoof in the air, stoutly unaware of Twilight’s unease at where the conversation had gone. “Can I give them their birthday parties? Can I? Can I?”

        “Didn’t you tell me that her dad rattled off Prospero’s speech from The Tempest to you when you started dating Kairi?” Riku asked Sora. “The one where he basically says that you’ll be cursed if you do it before marriage?”

        Sora chuckled slightly and nodded. “Yeah, he did.”

        Kairi burst out with a sudden renewal of surprised laughter. “My dad did what?”

        “Beg pardon, but the speech who gives from what?” asked Applejack, nose scrunched in confusion. Bon Bon and Spike both shrugged.

        “I’ve never heard of it,” said the baby dragon. “Never been a book in any library I’ve been in with a title like that.”

        Riku suddenly stood upon both hind hooves, and raised his right forehoof out in the mockery of an orator, before bringing it calmly to bear before Sora’s face. "Then, as my gift and thine own acquisition
Worthily purchased take my daughter: but"

Riku’s face turned hard, and he gave Sora a stare that could chill blood.

"If thou dost break her virgin-knot before
All sanctimonious ceremonies may
With full and holy rite be minister’d,
No sweet aspersion shall the heavens let fall
To make this contract grow: but barren hate,
Sour-eyed disdain and discord shall bestrew
The union of your bed with weeds so loathly
That you should hate it both: therefore take heed,
As Hymen’s lamps shall light you.”

Nopony could keep a straight jaw as Riku finished his verse, but no sooner had he ceased speaking than Sora jumped to his hooves and spoke stuttering in answer that soon grew strong and confident in his rebuttal.

“As I hope
For quiet days, fair issue and long life,
With such love as ‘tis now, the murkiest den,
The most opportune place, the strong’st suggestion.
Our worser genius can, shall never melt
Mine honour into lust, to take away
The edge of that day’s celebration
When I shall think: or Phoebus’ steeds are founder’d,
Or Night kept chained below.”

“Verily thine heart speaks true!” cried Riku. “Sit, now, and talk with her, for she is thine own forevermore.”

Sora frowned and pointed at Riku. “That’s not the line.”

“I improvised.”

“Bullshit. You can’t improvise Shakespeare! Were you even speaking in iambic pentameter?”

“Since when did you become a Shakespeare nut?”

“Since her dad recited that verse word for word at me with the wrath of Zeus’ mighty thunderbolts behind him and scared the soul right out of me! You think I actually replied as Ferdinand did? Heck no! I only remembered it was from Tempest because we did that in class the whole month before. I was nodding in fear so hard my neck got a cramp!”

“Oh, I get it!” Twilight exclaimed. “You two were quoting Willhoof Shakespeare! I thought there was something familiar sounding about those verses. I just love her comedy ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’.”

Riku and Sora both turned heads towards her and simultaneously yelped, “HER?”

Sora couldn’t believe this. Shakespeare existed on this world too, except as a female. A woman! That wouldn’t have been so bad, if it weren’t for the fact that his mind couldn’t wrap around a woman writing such tragedies as Hamlet and Romeo and Juliet.

Kairi giggled at his stunned face and bumped his side. “Really brings a new meaning to those rumors that he really was a woman, doesn’t it?” she whispered.

Trixie then did something she immediately regretted. She laughed out loud and snorted. “Heh, the fearless Sora, scared like a filly over the father of his marefriend.” While Sora just scowled and both Riku and Kairi laughed, Lyra and Bon Bon stopped and stared.

“You!” Lyra spat, pointing a hoof at the other unicorn. “You’re the one who boasted about the Ursa Major and then couldn’t beat an Ursa Minor.”

Trixie stumbled over her words much like she was now stumbling over her hooves. “W-well, yes. Trixie is the same Trixie who was falsely boast—”

“That Ursa Minor bit the roof off of Carrot Top’s house,” Bon Bon interjected.

“Trixie never meant any harm,” the azure unicorn whimpered, bad memories rising to the surface of her thoughts as Lyra and Bon Bon approached with angered steps. “Trixie only wanted ponies to remember and adore her.”

“Oh, we remember you alright,” said Lyra. “Why don’t you just turn your little tail and leave us—”

She was cut off as Twilight interposed herself between the two unicorns.

“Stop it, Lyra,” Twilight firmly demanded. “Trixie is no more at fault than Snips and Snails, and we all know that this town is a haven for hysteria and crazy. Nopony has been run out of here before, and I won’t have you chasing Trixie out just because of one mistake. Stars above, Ponyville has dealt with far worse than a cranky Ursa Minor.”

Lyra’s and Bon Bon’s ears flattened against the sides of their heads and they looked down, guilt creeping in from Twilight’s use of the hidden skill, lecture. “I guess you’re right, Twilight,” Lyra admitted. She looked up, a sheepish smile coming onto her face. “Sorry about tha—Trixie? Hey, where did she go?”

        “Huh?” Twilight asked. She craned her neck around but, sure enough, Trixie had vanished. Her stance instantly dropped out of ‘lecture’ mode and into ‘panicked-and-frazzled’ mode. “Oh no. Where did she run off to?”

        “Ponyville’s not exactly dangerous, Twilight,” Spike reminded her, and Peewee chirped in agreement from his shoulder. Just as he said it, two of the pure white pegasus guards that were part of the Ponyville contingent sent by the Princess trotted past. Both of them saluted and turned their heads towards Lyra, each calling her “Ma’am”, before continuing on.

        “Uh, what was that about?” asked Applejack. Lyra turned to look at the pair of pegasi in confusion, raising an eyebrow.

        “Beats me. I think I’ll go ask them.”

        Just as she started to trot off, Twilight turned around and gazed down a different street. “I’m going to go look for Trixie,” she announced. “Pinkie Pie, can you, Applejack, and Fluttershy keep the tour of Ponyville going for them?”

        “Okey-dokey-lokey, Twilight,” Pinkie said, imitating the salute the royals guards had just given Lyra.

        “And while you’re at it, find Rei,” Sora told Twilight. “She can handle herself and this place does look peaceful enough, but she’s going to need somebody’s help finding her way around.”

        “Aren’t you going to look for her, Sora?” asked Fluttershy. He shook his head.

        “Nah. Rei’ll need a little bit of time to cool off. If I go after her, no matter how hard I’ll try to calm her down she’ll keep freaking out. If I give her some space, she’ll wind down in time.”

        “Alrighty then,” Pinkie declared. “Don’t worry Twilight; we’ll keep the tour going. When you’ve found them both, come down to Sugarcube Corner with them!”

        Twilight giggled a little to herself, knowing what that was implying. “Okay then, I’m off. Coming, Spike?”

        “Coming!”

        Bon Bon lowered her head apologetically to the remainder of the group and glanced back towards where Lyra had gone. “I’m sorry about that, but I have to get going. It was nice meeting you, Sora, Riku, Kairi.”

        “Yeah, nice meeting you too, Bon Bon,” Kairi replied. “We’ll have to get better acquainted later.”

        “I’m sure we will,” the cream-coloured earth pony answered. “And then Lyra can talk your ears off about her crazy fascination with humans of all things.”

        Three sets of ears perked up. “Humans? Really?” Sora asked, interested.

        Bon Bon looked at him queerly for a second, and then offered a warm smile. “Why, yes, Humans. Isn’t that the funniest thing? Half the town keeps telling her that they’re myths from olden pony times, but she won’t believe them. She goes gallivanting all over Equestria on digs of supposedly ancient human ruins with other human enthusiasts all the time. She actually came back from one last week, beaming ear-to-ear and nattering everypony’s ears off about how they’d discovered an ancient human courtship dance or something like that.” She placed a hoof to her chin in thought.

“Ancient courtship dance ritual?” Kairi asked, snorting slightly in amusement and deliberately swishing her tail against Sora’s so that their tails could link together. He blushed, even moreso as he saw the foxy look she was sending his way.

“Now how was it supposed to go again?” Bon Bon mused to herself. “Lyra wasn’t too certain herself; they’d only gotten the first part translated and the rest was apparently too worn down on the stone tablet to decipher, but I think it started with a jump to the left.”

For an entire second, anyone who had access to the minds of Sora, Riku, Kairi and/or Roxas and Naminé, could have heard a pin drop as all cerebral function ground to a halt around those words exiting the unwitting Bon Bon’s mouth.

It’s just a jump to the left.

Six right hooves rhythmically tapped to the right in time three times. Kairi broke first with a snigger, that developed into a giggle, which spread from her tail into Sora’s body and caused him to bark out a quick laugh that incited a chain reaction which became a laughing virus that Riku inhaled and subsequently became infected with seconds later, and then three ponies dropped to the ground for the second time, bawling with tears in their eyes from uncontrollable mirth.

        Good Stance looked to the side as he and Silver Shield trotted down the lane. The mint green unicorn that had been with the Elements they’d passed by earlier was quickly cantering towards them. He slowed down, a slight smile coming to his face, and he motioned for Silver Shield to do so as well so that the unicorn could catch up. A good twenty seconds later, she did.

        “Follow me,” was all she said, dropping to a quick trot but otherwise continuing past them before either stallion could make a move or question her. Glancing at each other, unsure of the tone of voice in which the mare had spoken, the two guards did as she bid.

        “Why are we following the ma’am, sergeant?” Silver Shield asked.

        “Because she told us to, private,” Good Stance answered, rock-steady in his tone. They strode past the fattest pony either had ever seen, but didn’t stop to get a good look at him as the unicorn was still moving. All they really noticed was his dark grey coat and cat-like face, if cats had faces that were compared to squished tomatoes. “So quit worrying about it and keep an eye out for those shadows that we were warned about. They could be anywhere.”

        “But we haven’t seen one yet, sergeant,” the private protested. “The whole town seems really peaceful.”

        “Just because it seems that way doesn’t mean that it is,” Good Stance countered firmly. “Didn’t they teach you anything in basic? Now come on. We’re falling behind.”

        The mare led them to a typical Ponyville residence: two storeys, golden thatched roof, lovely windows with potted plants decorating them, white walls with supportive planks decorated in a slightly lighter shade of red than crimson; there was even a pink canvas awning attached to the side where a pair of minty and white lawn chairs sat in the shade between a round white table.

        The unicorn opened the door and raised her hoof towards the interior. “Inside. Now.” Good Stance quietly nodded his head and quickly trotted inside, noticing that the mare was making quick glances up and down the street to see if anypony was watching them.

        The interior was quaintly decorated. A coffee table in front of the striped chesterfield with a sparse coating of books and magazines lifted from the nearby bookshelf. On a blue armchair rested a beautiful golden lyre, and in a corner perched a white parakeet on its stand. He could see back into the kitchen and noted the two sets of stairs, one leading up and the other leading into a basement, but Good Stance quickly made room for the following Silver Shield and trotted to stand near the coffee table.

        Lyra’s horn lit up with golden light and the door shut behind her as she hastily entered her abode right after Silver Shield. The private looked back at the mare, confused and somewhat intimidated by the fact that she’d slammed the door shut. “Ma’am, what’s this about?” he asked, joining Good Stance beside the coffee table.

        The older and wiser pegasus stallion noticed a vein beginning to throb in the unicorn’s temple while her horn continued to be sheathed in gold, and the same glow encompassed the door, the windows, the walls…

        Oh buck, that’s likely a sound-cancelling spell. Sweet Celestia what did we do?

        Her horn stopped glowing, and Lyra turned towards the pair so fast that it was like a whip had cracked and barked, “Atten-tion!” She came to stand before them, and even though both soldiers were now looking straight ahead they simply wanted to wilt inside at the look they saw in the corner of their eyes. Both could sense an imminent dressing-down, and felt lead plummet into their stomachs.

        “I expected better,” Lyra said. “I expected much better than this from you, Sergeant Stance. I could see the private possibly messing up, but you and Lieutenant Wind Storm are the ones in charge of the stallions the Princess sent here yesterday. Both of you should have read the briefing of Ponyville and relayed all necessary information to your command. Private, you should have been paying attention when they did so!”

        “Lieutenant Heartstrings, I—”

        “Did I give you permission to speak, sergeant?”

        Swallowing the lump that had taken up residence in his throat, Good Stance forced himself not to look at the hoof she was pointing at him. “No, ma’am.”

        “What is worse, is that you saluted me in front of Twilight Sparkle. She may be a little distracted at the moment, with Trixie, the shadows, and these new ponies she’s showing around, but something out of place like that isn’t going to leave her mind. She’s too curious; she’ll want to know what it’s about.” Lyra stopped pacing between the two of them and looked at both. Her visage was stern and unyielding.

        “All she knows me as is Lyra Heartstrings, her former classmate who plays a mean lyre and is fascinated with anything regarding humans. She has no idea that I’ve been her undercover guard for the last four…years…by the direct order of her brother.” Lyra raised her head, but kept her eyes on them, and Good Stance seriously felt like turning into jelly in an attempt to escape through the cracks in the floor. “And you two could have just blown my cover in your incompetence. What do you have to say for yourselves? Sergeant?”

        Stiffening slightly as he was personally addressed, the pegasus locked gazes with the unicorn. There was no excuse. He knew that they weren’t supposed to salute her. He knew that. He’d read that no less than ten times in the brief on Ponyville as she was the resident guard officer, undercover though she was. It didn’t matter that in his brain he’d thought ‘a lieutenant, quick, salute!’, they were completely in the wrong, and he especially was at fault since he was setting an example for his subordinate. She hadn’t even been in armour or wearing headdress, so just what was he thinking? “I sincerely apologize, ma’am. We had been briefed and our failure to follow our orders is inexcusable. I knew not to salute, but I did so anyway. Do not punish Private Silver Shield too harshly; the fault lies with me.”

        “You’re right. The fault does lie with you.” Lyra stared at them for a good ten seconds, and both guards were sweating bullets under her gaze. Suddenly, she sighed. “Too late now to do anything about it though. If she finds out the truth, then she finds out, and I can openly tail her across Equestria instead of being all sneaky about it.”

        Silver Shield raised a hoof to his chest, indicating that he had an issue. “Permission to speak, ma’am?”

        “Permission granted.” Silver Shield looked her in the eye.

        “Ma’am, what do you think she’ll do if she finds out?”

        Lyra sighed again and cast her eyes to the space between his hooves. “Your legs are too close together, private, fix it,” she evaded, turning around.

        “Ma’am?” Silver Shield pressed, even while he fixed his footing. Lyra looked up to the ceiling, and Good Stance reckoned that she was trying to come to terms with something she desperately didn’t want to.

        “Her brother will get an earful or two, but she may never trust me again or want to stay my friend,” she answered slowly, casting a saddened eye back towards the two. “You’re dismissed. Go; and make sure you remind the rest of your outfit that I am not to be given so much as an eyes when being passed on the street. I’m a run-of-the-mill resident of Ponyville, and not affiliated with the Royal Guard at all. Understood?”

        “Yes ma’am.”

        “Dismissed.”

Shire Folk