My name is Twilight Sparkle. I am ninety-eight years, two hundred and fourteen days, three hours, and sixteen minutes old. When I was young, or well, younger, I met the five most wonderful ponies in Equestria, maybe even the world. My heart fills with remembered joy and laughter as I think over their faces.
Pinkie Pie.
Rarity.
Rainbow Dash.
Fluttershy.
Applejack...
It's Applejack's face I'm looking into now, a soft kind face, weathered by dozens of wonderful summers, full of hard work, matched only by the fun we, and all our friends had together.
Seventy six years. Seventy six years I've seen that face and for all but seventy four, I knew this day would come. Today is my last day with my last, dearest friend. She's asleep now, dreaming no doubt of when she was still young enough to buck the apples now tended by her children, and her children's children.
Perhaps I should explain a bit... I am ninety-eight, but I haven't aged a day since my friends and I rescued Princess Luna from the darkness in her own heart; a blessing that has become a curse, as I've said goodbye to each of my friends in turn, and now, I am forced to say goodbye to the last of those dearest to my heart - dearer than Princess Celestia, and dearer than Princess Luna, though I love them both.
I apologize; I seem to be losing my train of thought a little. When Nightmare Moon was defeated by the power of my new found friendship, granted by the Elements of Harmony, something changed inside of me. Maybe some of Princess Luna's power found a home inside of me, maybe it's a result of channeling the Elements of Harmony themselves, or perhaps it's my 'reward' for saving Princess Celestia's sister. I've never had the courage to ask, and now, I don't know if I want to know.
My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I am an Alicorn.
These are my thoughts, you see, as I have them. Princess Celestia, or 'Tia' as she seems to prefer from Luna and I, suggested I record them, that one day in a thousand years... It hurts so much to think of a thousand years without my friends.... one day in a thousand years I'll be able to look back, and remember.
Remember my family, now past. Remember my friends now.... now passing... and remember myself.
"Well hey there sugar-cube. Come to see yer ol' granny Applejack have ya?"
My heart skips at her voice. It's so sweet, like dear old Granny Smith before her, and there's still a strength that I don't think I'll ever posses. She's managed to look on my 'blessing' as nothing but a gift, and jokes about her own age even now.
"Of course I have Applejack. There are still apples in the fields that need bucking. What'll Big Macintosh think if he finds you lying in bed, lazy-hooves?" My face is a gentle smile I don't feel, but I think she can see the tears in my eyes.
"Shoot, sugar-cube. That won't do t'all. Maybe after my nap ah'll go show those little foals how it's done." She yawns and smiles, looking up at me with those vibrant green eyes, just as sharp as the day I met her. Her coat is a faded orange, and her mane is stark white, but when I look at her I still see my friend bucking apples like nopony’s business.
"Of course, Applejack, you need your rest before the big harvest. I remember a certain stubborn mare always bites off more than she can chew, as Big Mac used to say."
"Aw hush now lil’ filly. Ah'll get them apples harvested in no time at all. Ten seconds flat." Her face turns up in a smile, but all I can feel is my heart breaking. Rainbow Dash.... I can't hold back the tears anymore, even if I wanted to, especially since I can see her eyes starting to droop.
"...I'll miss you Applejack. Say 'hi' to Rainbow for me -- And Pinkie, and Rarity, and especially Fluttershy. I wish you didn't have to go." I don't know how my voice is steady, and I can't see for tears.
"...Ah will sugar-cube, don't you fret. Take care o' the farm would ya? Them young'uns need all the help y'can give 'em. Ah've lived a long, happy life, especially thanks t'you, so don't go cryin' bout me none." Her eyes close and she smiles, her breathing slowing, and stopping. She looks for all the world to be just asleep.
Before I can break down and let my emotions out, Applebloom pokes her head in, her mane still the beautiful strawberry-pink coloration, if a bit tireder, and still worn in a bow now much more suited to her size.
"Oh hey Twilight, how's Granny Applejack...? Oh... Oh dear Sisters..." She looks from my tears to Applejack's smiling face and the last bit of resolve in the mare, venerable herself, wilts. We sit with each other, crying, and mourning. I for my friend, and her for the closest thing to a mother she's ever had.
I... I don't want to remember how much this hurts. I'm stopping the spell now.
It's been a year since I said goodbye to Applejack, and I dare say I spend most of my time in Ponyville, rather than the Palace. It's alright though, Tia and Lu have things covered, and I won't be coronated as a princess for another few decades, so I have no official duties. I think that's a decision they both made when it became apparent what had happened to me.
I'm truly grateful to them both. In the past year, they've managed to help fill the void in my heart left by the last of my friends leaving me. Nothing can ever. Ever. Take their places... But at least I have family, even if they have adopted me - or perhaps especially because they adopted me.
I help run Sugarcube Corner, like I promised Pinkie, and I throw a party every year on her birthday for the whole town, just for her.
I own and help maintain Rainbow's cloudhouse. She asked it to be turned into a museum for the Wonderbolts, past and present, when she died. I display her own uniform in a glass case in the entry way. The only time I ever saw her happier than when she wore it, was when she was with Pinkie Pie.
As for Rarity, she left me perhaps just over one hundred sketchbooks full of her ideas, thoughts, and plans. She worked on them until the day… the day I lost her. I swore to her I'd make every single dress, real or imagined, no matter what it took for her, and I've kept that promise. Every year I make ten dresses, and host the fashion show in the Carousel Boutique. Sweetie Belle still comes to visit to catch the show, and a glimpse of her sister's memory. We talk a little, but mostly she spends her time with Applebloom and Scootaloo once a year.
For Fluttershy, every spring I wake up the descendants of all her animal friends, every winter I help them to sleep, and whenever I can find time, I go visit her cottage, and sing for the animals at night like she used to. She didn't ask me to do anything for her, but I like to think it makes her smile, wherever she is.
Applejack... Even now I'm taking a short break from applebucking. I don't know how she used to do it with just her and Big Macintosh. I've gotten used to it though, and promised myself I'd do it like AJ did. No magic involved. I'm paying for it, but I'm glad for my decision, though I think Apple Seed, Applebloom's youngest, is still surprised to see me carting in a load of apples. The little colt's still afraid to talk to me for more than a sentence or two at a time, but I don't mind; he has very expressive eyes.
I need to get back to work before I lose myself in emotions and thoughts again. It's nice, being able to just go out and do something simple, and exhausting like this. Even if I did send the first tree flying.
It's been another few years since my last 'entry' I guess. I've been keeping all of my promises, and that's been keeping me busy. The pain of losing Applejack is starting to fade enough that doing my 'chores' makes me feel close to my friends again. I love them all so much, and I miss them every day.
My heart aches but I don't start crying every time I hear one of their names anymore at least, or see a pony that looks like them. I may not have mentioned this before, but Applejack passed on her hat before she got too old to applebuck anymore. Apple Cider, the spitting image of Applejack, though with yellow coat and orange hair, has taken over for her, and Apple Bloom's starting to get on in years too, and I'm afraid soon I'll need to say goodbye to the 'cutie mark crusaders'. We still talk about some of the things they got up to as fillies and laugh.
It feels so good to laugh. I haven't really been able to very much since the past year or so. I still remember Pinkie Pie's first song when I met her. Giggle at the Ghosties indeed... I wish I could hear her sing it again...
So, before that goes someplace depressing, what else can I talk about? Spike still lives with me in the Library, and he's actually taken over as its custodian since I do have to spend some time in Canterlot at least. He's becoming a very handsome young dragon and he's even starting to grow horns. It's so cute. Still the same ol' Spike though, whatever he says. I'm grateful he's going to be around for a good long time.
Speaking of the Library, I actually found an old diary from when I first came to Ponyville. I remember most of what I said, but it's still a bit strange to read over the old book. I guess I really have changed a bit since then. Heh. Hehe. 'All the ponies in this town are CRAZY!' I had written that at least five times in the first two days, and another ten in the following month. But every time I did, it was with more affection. 'Study the magic of friendship' indeed. I think Tia knew how I'd feel at this very moment before she even said those words.
Still, that reminds me. I haven't been able to find Applejack's pendant anywhere, or any of the other elements. I know I've kept my tiara either near me or on me through the years. Usually in a nightstand or someplace I can find it just in case... What? Just in case I need it...I guess. It makes me wonder about the Elements of harmony. Do they vanish when their holders die? Have they passed on to new ponies that deserve them? Are they back at that old castle in those big marble balls? I'll ask Tia sometime and see.
Time is flying so fast, I can't keep up. Between the business of my studies on court law and etiquette, my promises to my friends, and all the other things that occupy my time, I haven't realized just how long it's been since I updated this!
Let's see... It's been about fifty years since my last entry, and I still don't look a day older. The only differences between now and when I first found my friends is about a foot of horn and two wings that I still don't use all that often.
In the meantime, things have gone on, much as life does. I've said goodbye to Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo. It hurt, but I wasn't quite as devastated as when I lost my friends. They actually passed all on the same day, and I think it seems appropriate somehow. They got their cutiemarks together too, it's only right they're together for one more big adventure.
Ponies have started forgetting what the party I throw every year is for, and I think it's begun to take a life of its own. Other towns have started celebrating, and Tia told me they're even starting to celebrate it in Canterlot. Oh how I wish Pinkie could be here. It used to be called the Pinkie Pie Palooza, now it's just called Pinkapalooza. Some ponies seem to think the proper way to celebrate is to decorate in pink, make pink cupcakes, pink cakes, wear pink dresses... I honestly don't have the heart to tell them otherwise. Pinkie would be happy just to see them having fun.
Sweet Apple Acres has become something of a center for the apple family, though they still live all over Equestria, the farmhouse has gained several additions over the years, and I'm honestly thrilled it's become so lively. The apple trees have never been tended better, and I'm sad to say my contribution to applebucking season is minimal, only about an acre of trees that Applejack herself planted. I still think they're the sweetest that's ever grown there.
As for Fluttershy's cottage? A family of ponies has moved into it. I was really hesitant about it at first, but they all wanted to be close to the animals, so how could I refuse? I've introduced them to every critter that lives in or around Ponyville, and even a few of the more harmless things from Everfree.
The Rainbow Dash Museum has had to be expanded actually, but I still make sure at its heart, it's still my friend's home. I've walled off her bedroom because... I just need a little something about all of my friends to stay the same. Something I can see, and go and visit, someplace to go when I miss them.
The boutique has actually gotten something of a ponytail going on about it in the past few years. It seems not everypony realizes I'm the one making her dresses, and finding the gems like she taught me how to. Some ponies seem to think that Raritys ghost haunts it or something. Still... I wouldn't turn down seeing her again, even if it was like that. She could make more designs and I could sew them for her. I've gotten quite good at it.
Oh and on the note of Everfree, the forest has actually started receding a bit. Nopony is cutting down the trees but... It seems like it's taming itself, as the years go on. I don't think anypony would realize it, to look at it, but after so long near it, I can sort of pick up on the little shifts. The poison joke field, for example, has lost its vibrant blue color. Goodness I miss Zecora too. Her hut's remained unchanged, oddly enough. Nothing ever goes near it but me. I still visit and smile at the masks, and remember old stories she told my friends and I.
Let's see... One more thing I'll add before I probably forget again; the Elements of Harmony. Tia smiled at me when I asked about them, and that's about all the answer I got out of her. Lu wasn't much help either, though she at least made an effort.
I found my old entries in my old room at the palace today. It's been nearly four hundred years since then, and as I read back over them, I remember how much it hurt to say goodbye to Applejack. I remember how much I miss my friends, though I've never forgotten. Not for a moment. I guess true to my prediction, I've forgotten about it.
There's simply been so much going on, so many things to learn, and still my old promises to keep.
Ponyville's become a city, though it's grown in the direction of Canterlot. Everfree is still old and weird in ways ponies are hesitant to approach, and Sweet Apple Acres is magnificent, as always. I still go to applebuck in the fall, every year. I meet Applejack's family, I tell them old stories. They think of me as one of the family and my heart sings whenever I see their freckles and happy, honest faces. AJ's hat still continues to be passed down, and I think it will for as long as there is a sweet Apple Acres. At least, it will be as long as I'm watching over them.
Pinkapalooza has become a national party holiday. I don't think anypony except me, Tia, and Lu remember Pinkie Pie as a pony anymore, but I'm not upset. I think this many ponies being happy all at once and partying is the greatest gift I could give her.
Fluttershy's cottage is still there, in a way. It's become a hospital for animals and ponies alike. It's still held in the family that I met when they first came to Ponyville. At my request, they've actually built the entire thing to the same decor as Fluttershy's home, and there's a special room hidden away in one corner that's actually Fluttershy's old parlor where we had tea on warm afternoons with our friends.
The Rainbow Dash Museum has become a bit of a national treasure. Every flying group in Equestria has at least an entry there, and a ramp has been installed with unicorn tour guides so Unicorns and Earth ponies can visit too. I still go see Rainbow's old bedroom though. I keep everything looking as if she had just left; which I'm pleased to say means it's still a royal mess.
Rarity's old boutique is still turning out the promised ten dresses a year, though I'm down to the very last book. It's... it's the one she left unfinished. Next year will be four original dresses, and the six she made for us for the Grand Galloping Gala. I could probably start making new designs but... The old yellowed sketchbooks are fading a little, no matter how well I take care of them and... I feel like I'd be breaking some kind of unspoken trust. I could never do that to one of my dearest friends, not even after over six hundred years since I last saw them.
As for me... Well I've aged a little. I've grown a bit lanky, and Luna is starting to resemble Celestia, though Tia herself seems to have stopped aging as well. Perhaps to let us catch up to her? Hehe. Oh! I'm a princess now. That happened ages ago, and at my request, I wear the Element of Magic as my crown. It's starting to look like one too instead of the massive head piece it once was. My responsibilities are the dawn and evening sky, and I color them like my old friends so I'll never, ever forget them. I think Tia and Lu approve.
So... What else to tell? Ah! Spike has found himself a mate, and I couldn't be happier for him. He still thinks of me as his mommy, even though I can fit on his muzzle now. He seems to still prefer vegetables and gems to anything else, and he's encouraging his new mate toward the same diet. The Library is long gone, I'm afraid. In its place is a grove of trees built into a much larger library instead. I may have had a hoof in that. Hehehe.
Hmm. Before I end the spell, I think I'll share a few dreams. Back when I lost Applejack, I dreamed of them every night without fail. Sad dreams, happy dreams, it didn't matter. I'd wake up in the morning crying. I've started to do so again; memories as fresh as the dawn dew play over in my mind when I'm asleep. How selfish I was when Rarity offered her generosity to make dresses. I still keep my old dress and the failed design as well. I have all of my friend’s dresses, and their horrible counterparts. I keep them preserved like Rainbow's Wonderbolt outfit, in my room with pictures of them... I wonder why I'm having them so much lately.
It's been only a single year since my last 'entry' and I just got home to the palace after showcasing the last ten dresses, and making the announcement that the boutique is closing. Rarity's dress show had become sort of a national event as well, but then it has been going on for the past five hundred years. I think everypony there was shocked when I explained that I had been keeping a promise to my oldest and dearest friends, and working from designs she had left behind.
When they asked if that meant the yearly fashion show was over, my heart broke a little bit. I think I might turn the whole thing into something for new and upcoming fashion fans to show their stuff. Rarity got, and deserved, her first chance, after all.
I considered making dresses in her style and not telling anypony but... I feel a little fulfilled now that I've completed my promise to her. I'd still trade anything to see my friends again though... anything save my new family.
My dreams have been constant for a little over a year now, and I still wake up with tears from emotion. I miss them so much. Still, I have to hold court twice a day now, and between that and my chores I don't have time to reminisce. I think Luna and Celestia are grateful for their mornings and evenings off. I think they spend them together, and it makes me so happy that they have each other again.
I think I'll leave off for now, maybe for good. I don't think I'm going to ever forget my dearest friends, no matter how long they're gone. I still don't know what happened to the Elements of Harmony, but the spark they ignited within me so long ago has become a flame that will keep me warm until the end of time.
If I don't return to my writing, and these memories ever dull, please. Please. Remember them. If I forget my own name one day, or forget everything I've ever learned about magic, remember their smiling faces. Remember the wonderful times we had together. Remember the joy and sorrow I feel even now.
The old document ended, and a tear fell onto the bottom of the yellowed paper, the magical ink still refusing to fade. A purple Alicorn sitting on the third throne between her two sisters looked up from it with a smile on her face. She and Luna looked akin to Celestia, as if triplets, though the sun princess had yet to age another day in the two thousand years she's spent with her family.
"Of course I'll never forget them. Not after Celestia's sun burns cold, and Luna's moon turns black, and the world beneath my hooves splinters to nothing." The words were spoken aloud, and the two listeners smiled to one another, perhaps a little too widely.
To be continued in Part II: Hopeful Dreams