//------------------------------// // The Ultimate Showdown (Of Ultimate Destiny) // Story: The Nightmare Before Nightmare Night // by Silent Bob //------------------------------// The Everfree forest was mostly silent now with Slendermare's frolicking having been called off. All except for one mare's voice... "Say it!" Rainbow Dash growled, currently having pinned down Slendermare in a wrestling move, twisting one of his hind-legs in an unnatural angle. "SAY IT!" "Uhhh... Rainbow," Scootaloo said, sweat-dropping. "I don't think he can say 'uncle'." Slendermare gave a frantic nod. "Well then he better learn how to grow a mouth!" Rainbow growled. "Cus nopony bucks with the foals of this town on my watch!" "I think he just really likes kids, though," Apple Bloom noted. "In a really creepy... but not creepy-enough-to-be-thrown-in-jail kind of way way." She then moved over towards the Slendermare's side, smiling. "It's alright, Slendy. We all love you too." The rest of the foals quickly gave smiles as well. If the Slendermare had eyes, they'd probably be watering. "You all gotta' be kidding me!" Rainbow Dash grunted, pulling back the Slendermare's leg to the snapping point. "He had you tangled in his freaky shadow tendril things!" "Yeah but-" "They're telling the truth, Rainbow," a certain voice called from the deeper woods. "The Slendermare's just really creepy." Dashie's eyes immediately widened. "What in the hay!?" ☼☼☼ ☼☼ ☼☼☼ "Rawwwwwwrrrrrr...." "Braaaaiiinnnnssss...." "Noooommmmsss...." A multitude of skeletons rose from the graveyard, (Twilight having made sure to raise only older corpses as to prevent any... awkward reunions). The ghouls in the crowd grinned in delight at the sight, though the living ponies began to back away from the scene, their faces laced with horror. "Uhhh... other Twilight," the real Spike said, inching away from the undead as they slowly circled him. "Just because I like books about the zombie apocalypse doesn't mean I want to be in one!" "Oh, whoops!" Twilight said, sweat-dropping. "I think I used the wrong summoning spell..." She then turned towards the zombie horde, groaning, "Come on you guys! I didn't raise you to eat brains!" With a grunt, a series of green beams lept out from her horn, striking the various skeletons. They immediately shook their heads, as if debilitated, before beginning to form a line before the Lich Queen. "Mooon Walllking...." "Hippp Hooopp...." "Sexxxybaaack..." "Ah, that's better," Twilight smiled. "Alright, you know the drill, Twilight!" Spike called, him along with the crowd of normal ponies sighing in relief. "Rapping then dancing. Go ahead and start when ready!" "Right!" Twilight called, before sending a smile Trixie's way. "Remember, no matter what's said, it isn't anything personal. Alright?" "No worries, Twilight," Trixie winked. "I'm sure you've been hardened up by all the times I whooped your flank back in the day." "Oooh you are just tempting fate, aren't you?" Twilight grinned, before turning to Vinyl Scratch, her mounting a DJ booth behind her. "Hit it, Vinyl!" "Awwww yeah!" she grinned, already bopping her head to a beat as she pulled out a record, twirled it, and lay it on a track. "Yall ready for this? Cus we’re going friggin’ nineties!" At that, a funky beat began playing from the player, it best resembling early nineties hip hop. As soon as the music hit her ears, Twilight then began to bop her head as well, before taking a deep breath and rapping: "West Necropolis born and raised, The graveyard is where I spent most my days, Chillin out maxing relaxin' all cool, Summonin' hordes and dancin' under the moon! Then a couple of guys, caught me in their red eyes, Recommended me to our crazy goddess of the sky, From then on out I was under her wing, So how the heck do you think you're supposed to match this bling? I got twenty spells alone that could blow your mind, Necromancy from the very start of time, So just go home and sulk you little girl, Cus I'm the fresh queen of the entire dead world!" As she finished, the crowd, both living and dead, roared in approval. "Wooooo yeah!" "Go Twilight!" "Go get her, girl!" "Oh no she didn't!" Spike grinned. He then composed himself and turned towards the Lich Queen. "Alright Twilight, dancing time!" "Right!" she called, turning back towards Vinyl while trying to catch her breath. "Hit it, Vinyl!" Nodding, Vinyl then stuck another record into the player, grinning as she did so. "Alright, everyghoul and everypony alike! Time for another blast from the past!" The speakers then began blaring: "It's time for the percolator! It's time for the percolator! It's time for the percolator! It's time for the percolator!" The line of skeletons Twilight had summoned gave their best equivalent of a smirk towards Trixie's own, hopped on their hind legs, and began to do a simple, yet somewhat coordinated dance mostly involving legwork. "Hooo boy," bone dragon Spike groaned, glancing at their moves. "I hope you have something better than The Spongebob up your sleeve, Twi..." After another ten seconds or so, fleshy Spike glanced down at the stop-watch he carried before blowing a whistle. "Alright, Twilight! Time's up!" He then turned towards Trixie. "Your turn, Trixie!" "Hit it, Vinyl Screech!" she called, the undead DJ quickly nodding and putting on a country-style tune complete with flaying fiddles and banjos. "That ain't rap!" Applejack complained, before smiling slightly. "It's actually good!" "You called it, sister!" Applemoon beamed. Trixie then nodded to herself a few times before singing: "If it hadn't been for this white-eyed hoe, I'd be head honcho a long time ago, So I thought it'd be best for you to know, That I'm gonna take your entire life's show! Were the pearly gates not good enough, You just had to come back and buck it all up!? Why not just go back to the final nap? Before you lose more skin off your back! Your Nightmare Night?! Hah, what a fright! I showed your town how to do it right! And the horror didn't come from Flutterfright's shed, I just knew how to get into their heads!" The ghouls in the crowd stomped their hooves in approval. "Hey hey hey!" Flutterfright squeaked. "I swear, there isn't anything bad in my shed! Well... except for the undead termites." "Awwwww snap!" Spike said, raising two impressed eyebrows. "Now, commence with the dancing!" "Keep the same song on, Vinyl!" Trixie called, Screechy quickly giving a nod. Her line of zombies then began to dance in a country-style manner, somewhat resembling square-dancing. Most of the ghouls and ponies this time let loose a brilliant cheer. "Mmmmm... country dancing for a country town. Pretty smart, Trixie," bone dragon Spike grunted to himself. The real Spike then blew his whistle. "Alright, alright! Round one is over." He then quirked an eyebrow, bone-dragon Spike whispering something in his ear. "Ah, gotcha," he nodded. "Anyway, to prevent bias we uh... apparently have a non-biased judge." "Slendemare, where you at?!" bone dragon Spike called in a wannabe-gangster tone. A wave came from the back of the crowd, a bruised and battered looking Slendermare sauntering through it closer to the battle. "Woah! What happened to you, Slendy?" Pinkie Slice called, raising an eyebrow. Slendermare merely held up a hoof as if to say, 'don't worry about it.' Referee Spike then took a deep breath before saying: "Well, if you're up for judging... did you see enough to make a call?" The Slendermare shook his head, before pausing for a second, apparently in thought, and then zipping forth one of his tendrils straight through one of the more undead ghoul's skull. The crowd of normal ponies gave a gasp at this. "Wooooah! Don't worry, everypony!" Lyra Heartstab called, giggling slightly as the tendril penetrated her brain. "It just tickles!" Her eyes then rolled to the back of her head. "Uploading visual and audio data... uploading visual and audio data..." She then made a 'ding' sound. "Upload complete!" Slendermare then retracted the tendril, Lyra's eyes moving back into position as she rapidly shook her head in a debilitated fashion. The Eldritch Abomination then brought a tendril to his chin in contemplation, before eventually turning Twilight's way and nodding. "Alright, Ms. Lich Queen, round one is yours!" Spike called, the crowd giving a somewhat mixed reaction. "Awwww..." Applejack sulked, quickly gaining a look from Twilight. "Er, sorry other Twilight, but I really liked the song she sang to..." The undead mare rolled her eyes, gave a sigh, and nodded towards Spike. "Alright, you girls know the drill by now! Round two!" He took a deep breath. "Fight!" Vinyl Scratch then gave a grin, and while twirling another record shouted, "another hit from years gone by for all you good little ghoulies and gals! Heh. Haven't heard this one since I lived in Manehattan!" A funky bass beat began to play, the entire crowd quickly moving to its groove. Twilight then took a deep breath, composing herself before rapping: "I said a hip, hop, the hippie - the hippie, To the hip hip-hop, and you don't stop, The rock it to the bang-bang, but never up jump, The rhythm of the Boogie Monster's beat!" "Holy crap! That's friggin' awesome!" Lyra Heartstrings cried. "Wooo yeah! Keep it up, Twilight!" Applemoon smiled. "Come on Flutterfright, give some support!" "Um... yayyyyy," she squeaked. "You see any ole ghoul n' any fool, Can call themself a scare machine, But there are certain rules I shouldn't need to school, You should never take it to the extreme! See you got the fright but your heart ain't right, Let me tell you what I've learned across the street. That while a little scare won't hurt a hair, You gotta keep it to a mortal beat!" The mortal ponies, and pretty much half the ghouls stomped their hooves in a terrific rumble, Twilight sighing in relief and smiling upon hearing it. "Alright, next track, let's do this!" Vinyl grinned, popping in another record. "Wait Vinyl! I'm not ready yet!" Twilight cried, her horn not done yet fully charging. "Stick to the plan!" "CAN'T... STOP... THE MUSIC.... LEEERROOOOOYYYYYY NNNNN'JENNNKINNNNS!.!.!.!" “God damnit, Vinyl!” bone dragon Spike growled as a the speakers blared: "Soulja ghoul off in this oh! Watch me crank it, watch me roll! Watch me crank dat, soulja ghoul, Then Supermare dat oh!" And naturally, the line of zombies began doing an only somewhat articulated, yet popular dance. "Mmmm... come on Twilight, you need to whip out the big guns. Soulja ghoul is something anyghoul can do with a little practice..." bone dragon Spike whispered. Mortal Spike blew his whistle after a moment or two. "Trixie! Your turn! Show us what you got!" "Here comes the good stuff (which is surprising coming from me)!" Vinyl Screech shouted, glaring at her counterpart. "Who's ready to take a visit to the Feel Good Inc.?!" "Hah! Alright! This time I'm not going so easy on you, Ms. Soulshard," Trixie smirked. As the beat became more and more pronounced, the wicked witch began with: "Now let's break it down for your little brain, Cus without a book in front of it it'd go insane. We're bred for holiday meant to scare, So why should we hold back, why not take a dare?! You may be my friend, but since I don't know when, You've been too soft, when will it end? How about when Trixie comes and shows you how, To send a mortal packing from a witch's scowl. You got no chance if you try to beat my best, My zombies gonna' show how we do things out west, They've got hooves of fire and nerves of steel, I wish I could say to you 'girl, get real!' Haha!" The crowd continued to groove with the beat, as Trixie smiled and sang: "Windmill, windmill, father time. Guess who can say 'Still Alive?' Take it all in heart and mind, You’re not even worth a witch’s time!" Spike then blew his whistle. "You've gone over the lyric time, Trixie! Show us your dance!" Vinyl Screech nodded before popping another record into her player. "Take me by the tongue, And I'll know you, Kiss me 'til you're drunk, And I'll show you, All the moves like Jagger! I've got the moves like Jagger! I've got the moves like Jagger!" Her zombies then began a somewhat complex dance pattern, the crowd roaring in approval. “Mppph, not bad,” Lyra Heartstrings smiled, Heartstab nodding. “A bit simplistic if I don’t say so myself,” Octavia said, her counterpart giving a nod of agreement as well. After a minute or so, Spike blew his whistle once again. "Alright! That rounds done!" Bone dragon Spike quickly moved to his side, whispering something in his ear again, Spike quickly smiling widely at the finish of it. "Woah, hang on everypony and ghoul! Turns out we have a surprise second judge! Let's hear it for the queen of rhyme herself, Zecora the zebra!!" Rolling her eyes and giving a humble smile, the Everfree Forest's lover quickly made her way through the crowd, both ghoul and pony alike cheering. "Hi Zecora," Flutterfright squeaked. "Hello there, Flutterfright! It's nice to see you on the side of light!" Zecora beamed. "Z-Zecora," Soulshard gasped. "Um... uh... nice to see you again!" Twilight quickly received a smile. "You as well, my undead friend. I do hope my potion helped you make amends." "A-Actually... I did figure something out," Twilight said. "If I can just come out of this rap battle in one piece... maybe I can-" "Ugh! Come on, Twilight! Let's keep this going," Trixie grumbled. "Fine fine," she said, rolling her eyes. "Judges, what do you have to say?" Spike called, Zecora and the Slendermare quickly huddling together. After a few minutes of muttering (well... Zecora muttering), Slendermare eventually gave a nod of agreement. Zecora then gave a sigh, turning towards Nightmare Twilight with a slightly disappointed frown. "While your rhymes were good at heart, Ms. Twilight, I'm afraid that in this battle one is meant to smite. Which is why for this round, we must give this other Trixie the crown!" "Awwww," bone dragon Spike pouted, before muttering to himself, "come on Twilight, where's the fourteen pounders?! I know you can make em’ dance if you want to... you just gotta leave your friends behind... cus if they can't dance and..." He then squinted an eyebrow. "Wait... that doesn't make any sense..." "Alright. Last and final round! Whoever wins this becomes the queen of... ghoul land or whatever it's called." "It's called the Nightmare Realm!" someghoul called from the crowd. "Right, right... sorry," Spike groaned, rolling his eyes. "Alright, round three! FIGHT!" "Awwwwww yeah!" Vinyl Scratch called. "I hope Pinkie Pie isn't here, cus this one could make anyone hyper!" "Heeeeey!" Pinkie growled. "I'm not hyper! I just really really like eating a lot of sugar! I mean, it's so sweet and good and with a little coffee on the MPH MPH MPH MPH MPH!.!.!" She was silenced by Applejack throwing a hoof over her mouth. At that, quirky, quick-paced nineties techno-beat began blasting out of Vinyl's speakers, Twilight at the start of it immediately singing: "I'M THE SCATMARE!" The crowd gave a roar of approval. "WOOOO YEAH! Scatmare Dawn?! Heck yeah!" Pinkie bounced, flinging off a horrified Applejack's arm. "Everybody dances one way or another, So check out my message to you! As a matter of fact, Don't let nothing hold you back, If the Scatmare can do it so can you! However I should probably tell ya, That I've had some help from, One of the greatest dancers around. A certain guard who could clear the yard, Moonwalker, the dancer of the crown!" And then she began to scat with a mouth propelled by a motor... and all was right in the world. "Woah," mortal Spike said, his eyes widening. "Now that... that is... I don't even know but I like it!" "Alright Vinyl, phase two of operation save my skin!" Twilight called, Vinyl giving a nod, grinning the widest she had all night, and placing another record into the player. "Oooh baby, I'm afraid yall ain't ready for this!" "'Cause this is thriller, thriller night! And no one's gonna save you from the beast about strike! You know it's thriller, thriller night! You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight!" Every mouth in the crowd dropped at the sight of the undead performing a number expert, intricate dance moves: Moonwalking, the Thriller Dance (alright, maybe not so expert), and pretty much everything the pop singer slash guard had under his belt. "Oh lord, game over, man! Game over!" Vinyl Screech cried. "Yeah Twilight! Way to turn up the heat!" Applemoon screamed. "Keep it up, darling! I dare say, you ain’t no lover but you're certainly a dancer!" Scarity cried. "I hope I get to knock out Trixie after this," Pinkie Slice grinned. "Huh?" mortal Pinkie said. "Cus the only place she'll be winning is in her dreams! YEEAAAAHHH!" "No! CURSE YOU MOONWALKER! CURSE YOU!” Trixie cried. “Why do you have to be so good?!" The Lich Queen's zombies continued to dance. However, right as they finished a certain ghoul in the crowd made his presence known: "OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HORRIBLE! ENOUGH!.!.!" A series of cries could be heard, Vinyl quickly shutting off Thiller. For in the center of the crowd, a single, random ghoul could be seen losing its fake form, its fur and skin molding into a tar like substance. Its mass quickly grew to about two stories tall, the ghouls and ponies around it scurrying from it, screeching. Then came the eyes... the sickening eyes... popping from the monster at every orifice along with its grinning jaws. "Alright... you ghouls were one thing, but that just ain't natural!" Applejack cried, her eyes saucers as she galloped away from the abomination. "W-W-What is it?!" Fluttershy squeaked to her counterpart. “You don’t want to know…” "Holy crap?! Is that-" "Blackblood!" Twilight growled. "What are you doing here?" He gave a scoff. "Well, I was supposed to be carrying out phase three of my plan, but SOMEGHOUL had to go and buck it all up!" "W-Wah?!" Trixie gasped. "W-What are you talking about?!" "Uggggh..." Blackblood groaned, rolling his eyes. "Don't you get it?! You were just a pawn in this whole thing! I thought you'd kill Twilight, not challenge her to some stupid rap battle! How was I supposed to know you'd be friggin' friends with her though?!" He then took a deep breath. "What was supposed to happen was that as you made your escape, after KILLING her, I would have slit your god forsaken throat!" "B-But why?!" Trixie cried, her eyes beginning to water. At that, Twilight quickly moved to her side, setting a comforting hoof on her shoulder. "Because," Blackblood said, his mouths a-grinning. "That's all I would have needed for Nightmare Moon to finally appreciate me! Killing the murderer of her prized student?! It would have been in the bag! Maybe I would have finally gotten what I wanted... maybe I would have even been able to court her! But you and your... your STUPID. LITTLE. FRIENDSHIP blocked my path! I thought you were more cold-blooded than that, but apparently I was wrong!" "You're one sick son of a bitch, Blackblood!" Soulshard growled, Trixie now visibly crying. "And did you really think Princess Nightmare Moon would have let you date her?! She wouldn't do that for the moon!" He then turned towards the crowd of both ghoul and normal ponies, his many eyes filled with manic-laced hatred. "Maybe not the moon, but the entire other world, maybe! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" He then grinned wickedly yet again. "I'm afraid the tracks have turned, my little ponies, I'll have to take a different route! And unfortunately, that means every last mortal on this planet is BUCKED! Time for a taste of Null Space! Cus I'm big black motha from beyond the stars! And I AM... BAD!"