Twilight was woken up by something hitting her front door.
Startled, she darted down the stairs to see what it was; it was Ditzy Doo, her mailbag completely overfilled with stuff.
“Ditzy, it’s not even noon! What are you doing here?”
“Letter for you!” the mailpony declared, and she handed Twilight…The mailbag. Twilight took a look inside, and found that it was full of books and scrolls, all addressed to her! She deactivated the spell around Big Macintosh’s room, and he stepped out.
“Help me with these,” she instructed, and he obeyed, lifting the books and letters out of the bag. At the bottom, Twilight found a scroll that had a seal on it. It looked newer than the rest. Twilight thanked Ditzy for her diligence, and the mailpony flew away. Twilight opened the scroll and read.
“Dear Twilight Sparkle,
“Thank you for writing me about this. I am flattered that you thought to contact me first about this issue, and I would be more than glad to help. I have sent these books and letters to assist you in researching and treating this issue. Magic addiction can be varied and quite serious if not properly handled, and from what you have told me, you have been handling this situation with tact, wisdom, and professionalism. For that, I applaud you.
“Given the nature of Magic Addiction, however, and in inexperience, I do not believe simple consultation will suffice. You will require the personal attention and advice of a professional. For that, I elect myself, and I will make best haste to Ponyville. I have your return address, so no need for directions, I am no stranger to your town.
“The books and letters I have provided to you are for you to keep and study. Since I wrote most of them myself, I do not require additional copies. They should serve as a handy reference and research material for you.
“I should be in Ponyville by the time you read this letter. I look forward to meeting you.
“Sincerely,
“Dr. Medul Oblong, MD, PhD.”
“He’s coming here?,” Twilight chirped smiling, “Oh, wow, he’s coming to see ME! Big Macintosh, Doctor Oblong is a PROFESSIONAL! He’s one of the best in his field! Oh, this is so exciting!”
“Well, don’t fergit that he’s here to help you with, uh, me. Ye can’t spend the whole tahm just pickin’ his brain.”
“That’s true…Oh! We should tidy up! There’s so much to do!”
There was a knock on the door. Twilight opened it, fearing that it was Dr. Oblong come early. It was Fluttershy.
“Oh, hi, Fluttershy! What can I help you with?”
“Hi, Twilight, um, Pinkie Pie wanted us all to meet her at Sugarcube Corner. She didn’t tell me why, she just asked me to bring you. If that’s okay…”
“Well, I am expecting company…But he did say he knew Ponyville, so I’ll leave him a note on the door, and one for Spike for when he wakes up. Oh, we haven’t even had breakfast yet!”
“Ah’m sure Pinkie Pie will be shovin’ cupcakes down our throats,” Big Macintosh noted, and Twilight agreed. She scribbled down a pair of quick notes, and followed Fluttershy to Sugarcube Corner, where their other friends had assembled in Pinky’s apartment. The place was dark, the windows closed, and only a single light was on that illuminated the seven guests. They could see Pinky sitting in the shadows, and there was somepony else sitting next to her, but they could discern no details.
“You have any idea wut’s goin’ on?” Applejack asked her brother.
“A-nope,” he replied. Suddenly, two lights in front of them turned on. Pinkie Pie was sitting next to a pony wearing a medical apron and a stethoscope wrapped around his neck. He was definitely an older pony, with wrinkles around his mouth and beneath his eyes. His normally red mane had been grayed over the years, and his pale yellow coat was nearing white. He wasn’t so old that either was completely gray, though.
“Today, ve vill be exhamining a peculiar soobject. Zhis peenk ponee has displayed erratic, unyoosual behavior atypical of social norms. Zhere haff been many reports of her botty making odd predictions outside of her control. Zees suggests zhat zere is somefink wrong with zhe bhrain.
“I make zees assumption because it ees alvways ze bhrain. Zhe soobject has an almost euphoric outlook, even in zhe face of unspeakable danger and horror. She has a history of interacting vith those who are not there, particularly during times of emotional or mental distress. I am afhraid zat zhis is ees von of zhe most serious cases I haff ever encountered in my career.”
“What’s the diagnosis, Doc? Is there a cure?” Pinkie Pie asked, a frown on her face.
“I am afhraid zhere is no cure for your condition, girl. I am afhraid zhat zis is permanent. For you see, you have zhe distinction of…beink Pinky Pie.”
Twilight facehoofed.
“And vile zhere is no cure, zhere is a serapy.”
“Yes?” Pinkie Pie’s eyes went wide with hope.
“My diagnosis…”
“Yes?”
“Fhor your conditions…”
“Yes?”
“Is to PAHTEE!”
“YES!” Pinkie Pie jumped into the air, and the lights came on, revealing a Pinkie Pie Party all prepared and ready. There was a banner that said, in pink, ‘Welcome Uncle Medul!’ There was, of course, cake and punch and presents and pin-the-tail-on-the-pony and, naturally, Gummi, staring vacantly into space next to a phonograph, his favorite song playing. Twilight stared at Pinkie Pie and Dr. Oblong, her mouth agape. Everyone else looked rather confused.
“Uncle Medul, I want you to meet all my friends! This is Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Twilight Sparkle, and Applejack’s big brother, Big Macintosh. Everyone, this is my great-uncle-“
“Doctor Medul Oblong, celebrated neurologist, psychiatrist, and arcanologist. Specializing in the combination of the three studies.”
“And a beeg fhan of my great-niece’s fantasteek pahtees!” he added, taking a sip from his cup of punch. Everypony exchanged glances.
“I got your letter yesterday. When letters are sent to zhe university, zey are usually rushed through zhe postal system. When I realized what vas going on, and where you lived, I decided to make zhe trip, not only to help viff zhe addicted, but also to see Pinkie Pie,” he explained, “It ees not a trip I make as often as I’d like. Eet is goot to meet you in person.”
He shook Twilight’s hoof, but her head was spinning with questions.
“How did you get here so quickly?” she asked, and he smiled.
“I know a goot shahttling service,” he replied. He looked to Big Macintosh. He grabbed something out from behind his apron, and, still keeping it concealed from him, moved it around, watching Big Macintosh’s gaze. Sure enough, the stallion’s eyes kept on Medul’s hoof.
“You must be one of zhe patients,” he noted, and he handed Big Macintosh a lollipop, which Big Macintosh took gladly, “I’ll exhamine you later. In the meantime, ve haff to party! Eet ees part uff Pinkie’s therapy.”
“I know!” Pinkie Pie chirped, “I’m so very ill!”
“I’ll say,” Rainbow Dash replied, socking Pinkie Pie in the shoulder, “If how awesome your parties are related to crazy you are, then Pinkie, you’re insane!”
“Aww, thanks, Ranbow Dash!” Pinkie Pie socked her back, and Rainbow Dash ended up sliding across the floor. Twilight Sparkle couldn’t help but laugh at the sight, “Now let’s get CRAZY!”
Sure enough, the music and laughter from the upstairs had brought attention to Sugarcube Corner, and the Cakes immediately took to baking, knowing that ponies were going to start partying very soon. It started, of all of the ponies, with Lyra and Bon Bon looking for Twilight Sparkle. Evidently, Bon Bon’s tongue had started swelling up.
“Right this way, girls. Doctor! This is Bon Bon, one of the other patients. Her tongue has swelled up, is this normal?”
Bon Bon opened her mouth for the doctor to take a closer look, and he nodded.
“Dah. For ponees who haff been leecking a unikhorn’s horn vizout any khind of real magic resistance.”
“Whose horn would Bon Bon be licking?” Lyra asked, scowling.
“She ees de von who has been addicted to her friend’s magic, da?”
“Yeah…”
“Zhat means you are zhe friend in qvestion?”
“Yeah-Oh…OH! EWW! EW! EW! EW!” Lyra ran off, her face holding an expression of disgust. Dr. Oblong turned to Bon Bon.
“You should be ashamed of yourself. Even in your condition.”
Bon Bon hung her head.
“Baaaaht…Zis is a pahtee. Have foon. Ze svelling vill go avay vif time. Poonch vill help.”
Bon Bon nodded, and went to the punch bowl, and, with Rarity’s help, managed to drink some.
“Will it really?” Twilight asked, and the Doctor shook his head.
“No, but she should stay. After all, zis is a pahtee!”
Lyra eventually emerged from the bathroom, her horn now scrubbed clean. Pinkie Pie saw her misery, and handed a present to her. Lyra smiled, and opened it. It was a nice, gem-encrusted sweater, a Rarity creation. Lyra thanked Pinkie, and walked up to Bon Bon, who hung her head in shame again.
“It’s okay,” she assured her friend, “We’ll get you better real soon.”
The Cutie Mark Crusaders showed up next, looking for Rarity, to see if she would make another cape for their newest member (Dinky Doo.) Upon realizing there was a party going on, they completely forgot that they needed a fourth cape. Nopony was quite sure who was next, but within a couple of hours, the entire building was full of ponies, very few of them knowing why they were partying. It was a Pinkie Pie Party. Did it matter?
Twilight found out firsthoof that Big Macintosh liked to dance-and he was pretty good at it, too. Someone had pulled out a fiddle and started play, and Big Macintosh seemed to take it from there, dancing alone at first. His hooves moved almost in a tap-dance like movement, and he was not afraid to follow through with the rest of his body as he danced around. Everypony gave him some space, and they started chanting him on.
Of course, Applejack took that as an invitation to show Big Macintosh whatfor, dancing no less strong, but with a mare’s touch. When the two siblings simply started dancing alongside them, Applebloom jumped between them, doing everything she could to follow her siblings, and not doing very well, falling over several times. The Apple siblings slowed down for Applebloom, and Scootaloo entering the dance floor brought the pace down to the point that Applebloom could follow, and everypony else started dancing, too. Twilight was content, at first, to chat and laugh, when she found herself being tugged into the middle of the dance floor. Twilight wasn’t much of a dancer, but she did what she could to follow everypony else’s lead.
Twilight wasn’t sure when she and Big Macintosh returned to the library, but she was sure that it was pretty late. When she’d returned, she realized that she’d never told Spike where she was going to be, or what she was doing, and he’d ended up spending all day in the library.
“Oh, Spike missed the party…” Twilight lamented, putting his blanket over him, “I didn’t even think of him. I’ll have to make it up to him for all of his hard work since this all started.”
“Ah’m sure Pinkie Pie would be more than happy to oblige ye,” Big Macintosh assured her.
“I’m sure she will,” Twilight Sparkle laughed, “I had fun. Thanks for dragging me into the dance floor.”
She gave him a kiss on the cheek, and climbed the stairs to her room. He turned an even brighter shade of red, and went to bed. At first his mind was on how much fun he’d had at the party, and vowed to attend more in the future. Then he remembered Pinkie’s odd uncle. And then the realized that pony was going to be studying Big Macintosh personally the next day.
The thought haunted his dreams.