If you were too lazy to read Part 1, you sure missed out alot. For example: my sister Water Gun recently came to visit town with his coltfriend Fonz Punkskull. From my point of view, Water doesn't seem to think so. So, my friend Blaze Goldheart suggested that I should do a little spying. But since I have to watch over my shop, I needed somepony's help. My friends were all unavailable. The Mane Six and Spike were out of town to witness the return of the Crystal Empire, and my friends in my Noble Six clan were also unavailable at this time, so I had no other choice. The Cutie Mark Crusaders were the only ones who could help me. So I called them over to my shop, and told them what they needed to do. They were spying on him and Water, and he seemed pretty abusive at times, but at other times Fonz was very sweet to her. It still seemed suspicious. Just then, while Water and Fonz were on their date, a pack of robots stormed inside my shop, and this is where we are right now. Let us continue!
"Flare Gun? You're coming with us." one of the robots said to me.
"I can't right now, I'm working." I said. Then I took out a notepad and checked it. "But I think I might be available on my next break, which is in 40 minutes. Can ya wait till then?"
"No." the second robot said.
"Well maybe you can order yourselves a pizza while you wait. How 'bout that?" I asked.
"How about you come with us instead?" the robot asked.
"You're really missing out, brah! The pizza - awesome!" I said as I whispered the word ‘awesome’.
"Look, we're robots, we can't eat. We just do what our masters tell us to." the robot said.
"Why? This is your chance to be free!" I said.
"But we don't want to be free. We want you to come with us." the robot said.
"Where we going?" I asked.
"To a place." the robot said.
"Can ya give me a little more detail?" I asked.
“A place down the road.” The robot said.
“Keep going.” I said.
“Why am I arguing with you? COME ON!” the robot demanded.
"And what if I don't?" I asked.
"Then we'll make you!" the robot said as he aimed his blaster at me.
"Nice blaster. Where did you get it, Toys 'R' Us?" I joked, and laughed.
"Forget it, let's just shoot him." The other robot said. They all aimed their blasters at me and starting shooting plasma rays at me. I dodged out of the way.
"Whoa! What's going on?" Bon Bon cried.
"Everypony, LEAVE!" I yelled.
"No, I'm enjoying this." Lyra said as she was eating some popcorn.
"C'mon, Lyra!" Bon Bon said taking Lyra's hoof. Everypony evacuates the stop, except for my friend Keith.
“KEEEEEEEEEITH! Leave!” I demanded.
“Flaaaaaaaaare! No.” Keith said.
The robots continued shooting me, but I wasn't defenseless, I know magic since I'm a unicorn after all. My plot-tattoo is a computer mouse, so my special talents have anything to do with the computer. There are cooking games on the computer, so that's why I'm such a good cook. So as the robots were shooting their blasters at me, I fired back using my laser blast spell, which is like a blaster. I hid behind a stove and fired at them, and I ducked a few times. The robots bursted into the kitchen, and I continued firing, but I was surrounded. The only spells I knew could only effect one pony, so I knew it was either one or none of them. “ARMOR LOCK!” I yelled as I crouched down and I was covered in plasma. “Ha haaaa! You can touch me now! With armor lock, I’m invincible! Mwah ha ha ha! Ooo aaa aa aaa! HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAA!” just then my armor lock wears off. “Oh… I laughed too long.”
For a second there I thought I was screwed, but there was a reason why Keith didn’t leave. He saves me by using his lightning spell on the robots, disabling them. “Oh.” He said.
“Oh Addie, you are a sight for soar eyes. I’m serious, my eyes hurt right now. Armor lock hurts my eyes if I leave them opened when I perform that spell.” I said.
“Ok.” He said.
“Really? You have nothing better to say other than ‘oh’ or ‘ok’?” I asked.
“Not really.” Keith said.
“Fine, be that way. I know you weren’t much of a talker.” I said as the two of us walked out of the kitchen, only to find four more robots waiting for us. “WAH BOOSKY!”
“Target sighted.” One of the robots said as they start firing their blasters at us.
“WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL US?!” I yelled as I dodged out of the way, but Keith was hit.
“Oh…” he said before he passed out.
“KEITH!” I cried out. “Did you just kill him?! DID YOU?!” I yelled angrily at the robots as my horn began to glow, but it glowed brighter than usual.
“Not to worry, our weapons are only allowed stun. Come along quietly so we don’t have to carry you out.” The robot said.
“Kay kay, alright. I get what you’re saying. Come along quietly. I’ll be sure to do so right after- BAZINGA!” I yelled as injected my hornsaber into one of the robot’s chests and it short-circuits.
“Open fire!” one of the robots instructed the other robots as they continued firing at me. I fired at them with my laser blast spell until I fell back into the kitchen and hid behind the counter.
“Oh nice… leave me here.” Keith complained as he continued to lay there on the floor.
“Quit being lazy then!” I yelled. “Oh look who I’m talking to!”
“Yeah.” Keith said.
The robots were gaining on me. They burst into the kitchen and begin firing. I continue to blast them with my laser blast, hoping I’ll be able to take them down. This is all self-defense though. I only use my magic for self-defense or if I wanna look cool. Most of the time these days, it’s to look cool, but for now the latter. Wait… not the latter. What’s the opposite of latter? I dunno, the other thing. So I continued firing until I backed off to the back door and went outside.
"GET HIM!" a robot yelled. The robots were chasing me as I ran around back to the front of the shop and went inside. A couple of the robots stayed behind. I fired at the robots and I shot one of them and it deactivated. None of my spells are deadly, but my laser blast also has an EMP burst if you didn't know that. Of course you didn’t, I never mentioned it in Book 1. It completely deactivates machinery, but it only shocks a pony.
"Hey, don't fall behind." I joked after I shot that robot in the back. The deactivated robot used it’s emergency alarm to call the other robots that were outside.
"He's back inside! SURROUND HIM!" The robot yelled. The other robots started running towards the front door so they can surround me, but like my trailer, my shop also has a security system. Once the rest of the robots went inside, I pushed a button and an alarm went off. All the doors and windows sealed up and all the lights in the room went red.
"There's no use fighting. If you really want me, here I am, but none of us can escape." I said. Although that's not true; there's a mainframe in my office, if I push the code, the lockdown will deactivate, but they don't know that, unless they can hear my narration. I must thank Swinebutt’s robots for helping me build this place. No these robots that are in my shop are not Swinebutt’s robots. They’re way too intense to be. I have no idea where they came from. The robots didn't stop though, they started firing at me again, but I just dodged, and I started using my magic to throw chairs at them. Yeah, I can do better, but I didn't wanna waste my awesome powers for just some stupid robots.
"This is your last chance! SURRENDER!" one of the robots said.
"And this is your last chance to just stop fighting, so we can just get along." I said.
"But we're programmed to hate you." a robot said.
"And I'm programmed to not be bossed around. I'm my own boss. BOSS BOSS BOSS BOSS!" I said.
"Then you will meet your destiny!" the robot said.
"My destiny, huh? Is she pretty?" I asked.
"What?" a robot asked in confusion. "Nevermind." The robots started shooting at me again, but I activated my Armor Lock spell so they couldn't hurt me.
"Oops! Did you know I know the Armor Lock spell?" I asked.
"Yeah you just showed us.” The robot said.
"Really? I forgot all about it.” I said.
“You’re exactly how are boss described you. I mean not like robot dating sites.” The robot said.
A cutaway shows that same robot meeting with his new date for the first time. He looks at a picture of the date who was an Easy-Bake Oven and then the robot said, “You look nothing like your photo.” It turns out the robot is dating a gas stove from New Hersey, the garbage town near Manehatten. The cutaway ends.
So as I continued fighting the robots, I tripped over one of the deactivated robots and on it’s left shoulder I find a familiar logo on it. It was a black circle with a red ‘S’. “That logo… I seen it before… it’s… Shade from a Teen Titans fanfic!” In all seriousness, that particular logo I kept seeing in my past. It marks the sign of the mysterious doctor that’s been trying to ruin my life in Ponyville. I still have yet to know who this doctor is. I hope to find out soon. After all the constant firing the robots have been doing, their blaster overheat.
"Wait, hold on our blasters over heated. Gotta wait for them to cool off." a robot said.
"Forget about cool." I said. "Because feel dat Mareami heat!" I jumped out and I activated my hornsaber spell again and whacked two of the robots with it and they eventually they deactivated, even though my hornsaber spell wasn't really much more than a baseball bat with a pointy end. The remaining robot picked me up and threw me across the shop, and I landed on the picture of Princess Luna I had on the wall.
"LUNA!" I yelled. "I… uh… wha- wha… WHAT?! Angry face!" I angrily marched towards the robot and it started getting a little nervous. "Let me tell you something, brah! Nopony, and I mean NOPONY MESSES WITH PRINCESS LUNA! She's the best princess ever, and you're gonna pay!"
"Ooooooh, poo." the robot said.
Then the robot looked down after we heard something liquid get on the floor. You may think the robot oiled itself, but actually it was just Keith at the soda machine; some soda was pouring out non-stop.
"Uh, Flare? I think your soda machine is broken." Keith said. That distracted me for a sec, but then I continued angrily walking towards the robot, and the robot tried walking backwards, but it had nowhere to run. I started to laugh crazy and evilly as I walked over towards the robot doing… unexplainable things to it. So unexplainable that I don’t even know what I did! Let’s just say the robot might need therapy by the time I’m done with it.
Meanwhile at Taco Shack, Water and Fonz were just about to take their order. Fonz wanted them both to have a Homewrecker, which was a type of burrito, but Water wanted Taco Salad, but then Fonz ordered her to order what he's having, so she did.
"Wow, Water has bad coltfriend." Apple Bloom said. The CMCs were on top of eachother wearing a long trench coat as they continued spying on Fonz and Water. Apple Bloom was on top with a mustache and hat, Sweetie Belle was in the middle and had her hooves out from the sleeves, and Scootaloo was on the bottom.
"Tell me something I don't know." Sweetie Belle said, opening a part of the trench coat so she can see what's going on outside.
"Why do I have to be on the bottom?" Scootaloo complained, opening the bottom part of the trench coat, sticking her head out. "I look more of a stallion than both of you combined."
"We did rock, paper, scissors, and ah won." Apple Bloom said.
"We don't even have any fingers. How can we do rock, paper, scissors?" Scootaloo asked.
"We draw them, remember?" Sweetie Belle reminded her.
"Oh yeah." Scootaloo said.
"Oh, somepony's coming!" Sweetie Belle whispered as her and Scootaloo closed the trench coat to hide their faces.
"Hola, amigo! Welcome to Taco Shack! How may I help you?" the mexican pony waiter asked the disguised CMCs.
"Heh, he sounds like Speedy Gonzalez." Sweetie Belle whispered.
"Shhhh!" Scootaloo shushed at Sweetie.
Apple Bloom clears her throat, and speaks to the pony in a manlier voice. "Hola. Ah will just take the nachos, please?" she asks.
"Coming right up!" the waiter said, then he walks away.
"Aww, but I wanted to try their refried bean dip." Sweetie Belle whined.
"Quiet. We're here to spy on Water and Fonz." Apple Bloom said.
"So Fonz, how you liking Ponyville?" Water asked him.
"Didn't you just ask me that?" Fonz asked her.
"Oh, right. I forgot. Sorry." Water said.
"Careful with the stupid questions, Water. You don’t need to stare at the TV all night again.” Fonz said.
"Alright, Fonzie!" Water said with a smile. "You know something? I haven't heard from Flare all day."
"He must be busy." Fonz said.
"Yeah, but he said he'd call me." Water said.
"Maybe he doesn't care about you anymore." Fonz said.
"Oh Fonzie, you're so silly!" Water said and giggled. "Flare would never."
"How would you know that? How many times did Flare call you while he was living in Ponyville?" Fonz asked.
"Well... a few. Probably 4 or 6." Water said.
"Water, my love. Flare has alot of friends here now. He doesn't have time for his family anymore; he's moved on, babe." Fonz said with his hoof on her shoulder. "Have you seen all the friends he had?"
"Well not all of them." Water said.
"He's had tons of fun adventures here, so I heard. He's spending lots of time with his new friends, and he has the shop, he doesn't seem to have time for you anymore." Fonz said. Water frowned and looked down. "But me, I'll always be there to protect you, and be there for you, in any way's possible." Fonz hugged her and gave her a kiss. "Who's my baby girl?"
"I am." Water said sadly.
"C'mon you can do better than that. Who's my baby girl?" Fonz asked.
"I am." Water said in a happier tone.
"Who's my baby girl?" Fonz asked her again a little louder.
"I AM, FONZIE! I AM!" Water cried and gave him a big hug.
“Hey careful, babe, you’re getting us unwanted attention.” Fonz said. Just then, a bunch of the waiters come together, singing, playing maracas, putting sombreros on Water’s and Fonz’s heads and gave them a free spicy dessert for two.
“Arriba, amigos! Da love birds get a free spicy dessert! Happy loved ones everypony!” the waiter said.
“ARRIBA!” the other waiters yelled out in excitement.
“We didn’t even have our dinners yet.” Fonz said.
“Dis is dinner dessert! Enjoy your meal senor and senora…..” the waiter paused, hoping they’d get their last names.
“Punkskull. Senor and senora Punkskull!” Fonz said.
“Wait… does that mean what I think it means?!” Water asked shockingly.
“It sure does, baby. Sure does.” Fonz said to Water.
“Yay! We’re going to Disney World!” Water cried out in excitement.
“Umm… alright, that’s one way of saying it.” Fonz nodded.
"Alright, let's go." Apple Bloom said, but before they could get up, the waiter came back with the check.
"Excuse me, sir? I believe you have a bill to pay first." the waiter said.
"Alright, give us a second, sir." Apple Bloom said to him. The waiter walked off. "You girls got any change?" she asked the other crusaders inside the trenchcoat.
"How much is it?" Sweetie Belle asked.
Apple Bloom checks the check (heh); "Uhh... 10 bits."
"10 bits? For nachos? What a rip-off!" Sweetie Belle complained.
"Oh Celestia, I think I left my pocket book at home." Scootaloo said.
"All I have is 2 bits." Sweetie Belle said. "How much do you have?"
"Ah spent all mah bits on this disguise." Apple Bloom said.
"What are we gonna do?" Sweetie Belle asked.
"I think we should just make a break for it." Scootaloo said.
"But that's stealin." Apple Bloom said.
"How are we gonna explain this to the waiter?" Sweetie Belle asked.
"Uhh, Flare? Flare do you read?" Scootaloo asked me through the walkie talkie.
"Do I read what, Scoots, over?" I asked.
"DO YOU READ, OVER?!" Scootaloo yelled.
"Nah, I don't like reading, over" I said.
"Look, we bought some nachos at Taco Shack and we don't have enough bits, can you come over?" Scootaloo asked.
"Didn't copy that, over." I said.
"That's it, my sentence is over." Scootaloo said.
"Your sentence is what, over?" I asked.
"My sentence is- wait, I have to say over, even though my sentence ends with the word 'over'?" Scootaloo asked.
"Before your sentence is what, Scoots?" I asked.
"FORGET IT!" Scootaloo cried. "We're quitting! You're on your own!"
"You're on your what-" I asked, but she turned off her walkie talkie before I could finish the sentence.
“Well it wouldn’t hurt washing dishes.” Sweetie Belle suggested. “I think this might be better than my last job with a crew of penguins. I looked very nerdy, but at least I had ice cream every Thursday, but I did have a nosy twin brother, and I was computer animated, and my eyes looked like little dots.”
“Ok, we get it, you were on 3-2-1 Penguins; no need to brag about it.” Scoots complained.
“Actually, I was talking about the Penguins of Madagascar, but yeah that too.” Sweetie Belle said.
Meanwhile, Water and Fonz finished up and were walking towards my shop; they then went inside. "Flarey, we're here!" Water said, but then she noticed the shop was a mess, and there are three destroyed robots on the ground, and one robot cuddled itself in a ball in the corner, crying and mumbled to himself, "I'll never mess with Luna. I'll never mess with Luna. I'll never mess with Luna."
"Flarey, what happened here?" Water asked.
"Oh, nothing really. Just cleaning up a mess.” I said.
“Why are there robots around?” Water asked.
“Water, one thing at a time, please! I can only think about so much at once.” I reminded her.
“At least you’re thinking at all.” Water teased.
“HA!” Fonz laughed.
So yeah, pretty much EIGHT maniacal robots just bursted into my shop and started threatening me and shooting at me!" I yelled.
"Seriously?" Water asked.
"Like seriously actually. Serious face." I said. “You see my face? Does it look serious right now?”
“Actually it looks pretty angry, but then again, when you make a serious face, it kinda looks like your mouth looks like one from a tiki head, either that or Photo Booth’d” Water said.
“Yeah thanks for that, Water.” I said sarcastically.
“Sorry if I gave you the wrong idea, Flare, like the main reason why Princess Celestia doesn’t like Discord.” Water said.
A cutaway shows a flashback to the Return of Harmony episode. “I need you to wield the Elements of Harmony once again and stop Discord before he thrusts all of Equestria into eternal chaos.” Celestia instructed the Mane Six.
“But why do you have such a grudge against him?” Twilight asked.
“I used to be a guy.” Celestia said.
“Sorry I asked.” Twilight said awkwardly. The cutaway ends.
"Are you okay, Flare?" Water asked. “You seem a bit on edge.”
"Don't worry, I'm kay." I said.
"Sheesh, Flare. You really know how to take care of yourself it seems." Fonz said.
"I know, but I don't wish to do violence. These robots attacked me first. I was only trying to protect myself. Now my shop is a mess!" I said. “Wait a minute.”
"What's wrong with that robot?" Water asked, pointing to the crying robot.
"Let's just say, it won't be messing with anypony anytime soon." I said mischievously
Fonz went over to the destroyed robots and looked at them with an angry look on his face. "Looks like Flare is too strong, I might have to deal with him myself." Fonz said to himself.
"What was that, brah?" I asked.
"Oh, it's just... I'm really sorry of what happened here, buddy." Fonz said.
"No problemo, brah." I said. "I could get this mess cleaned up in no time."
"Want me to help?" Water asked.
"Actually Water, we have to get going." Fonz said, grabbing her hoof.
"No, it's cool, Fonzie. I really wanna spend some time with my brother." Water said.
"Flare has things under control, right bro?" Fonz asked me with a smile.
"Actually, if Water wants to help she can, it's up to her." I said.
"I want to help." Water said.
"No, we're going home." Fonz ordered.
"No, I wanna stay." Water argued with him.
"Don't talk back to me!" Fonz yelled at her.
"Fonz, relax bro." I said.
"Fonzie, what's your problem?" Water asked.
"You not doing what you're told! NOW LET'S GO!" Fonz ordered.
"You mad bro?" I asked.
"Yeah, you mad?" Water asked him.
"SHUT UP!" Fonz yelled at her as he lifted his hoof.
“DON’T YOU DARE!” I yelled at him as my horn began to glow.
“I’m…. I’m sorry, baby. I kinda lost my temper there.” Fonz said.
“It’s ok, Fonzie.” Water said.
“It is NOT ok!” I said. “Also… Fonz… how did you know these robots attacked me?”
“Isn’t it obvious? Look around.” Fonz pointed.
I observed my shop and it appears he would have a point there. “Ok you got a point there, brah, but try to control your temper. If you so happen to assault my sister, I’m kicking you out of my trailer and file a restraining order. Capiche?”
“Yeah, yeah, capiche. C’mon Water, let’s go.” Fonz instructed her as he walked out.
"I’m sorry, Flarey. I promise I’ll spend time with you when I can.” Water said.
“Water, just to let you know, if he gives you anymore trouble, I promise, I’ll take care of him for you. I’ll always be there for you, sis. Please remember that. Lawl remember, alright?” I asked.
“Lawl I remember, Flare. I understand completely.” Water nodded.
“Just…. make sure he doesn’t assault you or make you feel uncomfortable. I don’t… I don’t want him to hurt you, Water. I’m really worried.” I said.
“Flarey, I’m ok. He does have a temper, but you have to remember he’s only doing what’s best for me.” Water explained as she placed her hoof on my shoulder.
“I strongly doubt that.” I said.
“Look. Tomorrow, all day, you and me. No Fonz, it’s just the two of us. You can tell me a little more about your adventures here in Ponyville. Sound good?” Water suggested.
“Sounds like a great idea, Water!” I agreed, even though she could just read Book 1 of my story. I really write these you know. This is like my journal. It’s like Diary of a Wimpy Kid, except I’m not as wimpy as I used to be. So they both left the shop, and I spent most of my time afterwards thinking of what should happen next.
“That pony is going really out of hand. My sister is not a toy, she's a pony! He doesn't own her! Fonz is a terrible coltfriend and if he doesn’t shape up soon, I’ll have no choice but to make Water break up with him.” I said.
"Yeah, you do that." Keith nodded.
"Oh, you're still here?" I asked.
"Yeah." he said. “Why? You want me to leave?”
"Sorry you had to see that." I said.
"No worries, just teach that punk a lesson.” Keith advised me.
"Oh don’t worry, I will; I most definitely well. Meh heh heeeeeh.” I chuckled evilly.
A few hours later, I closed up shop and went back home. Water was talking to my fish before I got there. "I dunno guys. What you think?" Water asked.
"Yes, we think Fonz is a bad coltfriend and you should break up with him." Pearl said.
"I mean, I like tacos, but I like pizza better." Water said.
"Oh she's talking about food." Rainbow said.
"I like this subject!" Yoyo said excitedly.
"You understand me, right Darrel?" Water asked him who was swimming around the front of the tank.
"Yeah, of course! I agree with everypony! Everypony is right!" Darrel said.
"Water, what are you doing?" Fonz asked her.
"I'm talking to Flare's fish." she answered.
"Well stop that, its stupid." he said.
"Flare does it all the time." she said.
"Yeah, well Flare is stupid." he said.
"Hey, don't talk to him that way!" she demanded.
"You’re right, I’m being over-sensitive.” Fonz agreed. “We’re not out in public. Go ahead and talk to those… little parasites.”
"Ooooooh… wow. Woooooooow.” Rainbow said, feeling a little insulted.
"What do you think, Piddles? What do you think I should do?" Water asked Piddles.
"How should I know, but if you really want to impress Flare, you should stick to the pizza." Piddles said to her.
"I don't care either way. Any food is good food for me." Yoyo said as he burped.
"Oh Yoyo, you can at least say excuse me or something." Pearl suggested.
"Something." Yoyo said.
"Really, Yoyo?" Pearl asked.
"Really really, Pearl." Yoyo said.
Water chuckles. "You fish crack me up sometimes. Especially you Rainbow."
"How?" Rainbow asked.
"I think she was pointing at me." Dorthey corrected him.
"No she wasn't, Dorthey. Besides, she said my name." Rainbow corrected her.
"We're the same kind of fish, how can she tell the difference?" Dorthey asked.
“Here Water, c’mere.” Fonz said with his front hooves out. “Gimmie a hug. I’ll always be there for you, come on. I won’t bite.” So Water accepted the hug. “Awww…. I love you, Water Gun.”
“I love you too, Fonz Punkskull.” Water said as they cuddled.
“Awwwwww- BLEH!” Yoyo teased, making a barfing sound.
“Gimmie a kiss, baby.” Fonz suggested. Water blushed and giggled and then she leaned close to Fonz’s face, preparing to give him a kiss, but before they can do so, I was on the other side of my closed bedroom door and knocking.
Knock, knock, knock; “Water?” Knock, knock, knock; “Water?” Knock, knock, knock; “Water?”
“Do not make a sound.” Fonz whispered to Water.
“Whispering ‘do not make a sound’ is a sound.” I reminded him.
“Oh DANG his Vulcan hearing!” Water complained. I opened the door and saw Fonz and Water were in there cuddling.
“Fonz, I thought I asked you not to go into my bedroom?” I asked.
“Water’s in here.” Fonz said.
“She’s my sister! She’s allowed in here.” I corrected him.
“Kinda ironic, counting that most siblings don’t want their siblings in their rooms.” Water said.
"Oh, Flare's here. Now this dude’s in trouble." Piddles said with an evil smirk.
“It’s not just that, Fonz – you signed the Roommate Agreement.” I reminded him.
“Oh here we go with the Roommate Agreement.” Water rolled her eyes and complained.
“Let’s see… section 4, paragraph 5… no… wait… it’s paragraph 7.” I took out the Roommate Agreement and read it aloud. “It says here that I, Fonz Punkskull (I’m just reading what it says by words) hereby accept that I am not allowed to barge into Flare Gun’s room under any circumstances, unless an apocalyptic possibility were to occur, such as a massive earthquake, chaotic significance, or even the possibility of an alien invasion.”
“ALIENS!” Pinkie yelled from all the way at the Crystal Empire.
“Flare, what makes you sure that aliens exist? It’s stupid.” Fonz asked.
“Don’t jinx it, brah, it could happen.” I said.
“Here we can just go back to the guest room.” Water said.
“Why? You think I should be told what to do by this pony? I have no idea why he’s letting us stay here. He obviously doesn’t like me.” Fonz said.
“You’re right, I don’t like you, but I am forced to respect you unless you give my sister any more trouble.” I said as I pointed to the Roommate Agreement.
“Why should I listen to a pony like you? A pony that treats his own fish like they’re pony-beings. They have no rights!” Fonz explained.
“HEY! Don’t you DARE talk about my fish that way!” I demanded as I hugged my fish tank.
"Nopony messes with us while Flare's around!" Darrel said. "WOO! Go Flare!"
"Why do you care about those little fish? They have no feelings." Fonz said to me. All the fish gasped.
"Oh, he's asking for it now." Yoyo said.
"Excuse me? EXCUSE ME?!" I yelled at him. "These fish are very special! Don't ever talk about them that way!"
"Oh yeah, what you gonna do about it shrimp?" Fonz asked, really trying me.
"That's not all, you're abusing my sister!" I said.
"He is not!" Water said.
"I am not!" he said.
“Fonz, may I speak to my sister in private?” I asked him.
“No, if you have to tell us something, tell both of us!” Water demanded.
“No, he’s right. This is between sibling and sibling. I’ll get out of your way.” Fonz said as he leaves the room, but before he leaves the room, he uses his magic on my accordion case without me knowing and then he storms out.
"Water, don't you see what he's doing to you?" I asked her. "He's being a jerk to you! He thinks he's better than you!”
"But he is." Water said. “I wouldn’t be who I am today if it weren’t for him.”
“Who you are today? You’re no different than when you moved out of Mareami! The only difference is: you’re a doormat! He’s treating you wrong and you need to break up with him!” I instructed her.
“I WILL NOT! Fonz is very sweet to me! He just shows tough love!” Water explained.
“Tough love? He nearly hit you!” I reminded her.
“But he didn’t.” Water reminded me.
“Has he ever hit you in the past?” I asked.
“Well… maybe one time when I was talking to another stallion.” Water said.
“Were you flirting with that stallion?” I asked.
“He was our waiter trying to take our order!” Water said.
“See? He is abusing you! Don’t you deny it! You have to break up with him before it’s too late! You’re going to regret it, Water!” I yelled.
“Look Flare, I understand what you’re saying, and I somewhat agree, but I don’t want to be alone, Flare. I could never find anypony to love me. Only Fonz does, and I cannot lose him. I will not be able to find anyone else!” Water begged.
“Sure you can. The ladies here love me.” I said. “I’m pretty sure they’ll love you too!”
“Flare… I’m interested in stallions.” Water reminded me.
“Really? Cause you look like the mare-lover type.” I said.
“Flare, please don’t tease me about this. Happy Wheels already did that.” Water said.
A cutaway shows Water playing Happy Wheels, but without showing all the blood and such. “Save your boyfriend, huh? That’s what the map is called huh? No! Not my right half! Oh you gonna try to stop me huh you lawyer suit, weirdos? How do you feel with a TIRE ON YOUR FACE! HA! Dude, why are you sitting on that guy?!” she started laughing. “Excuse me. Get outta here! You’re coming with meeeee. Ok just let me get passed your weird get-together so I can save my boyfriend. Whoa! Sorry ‘bout that! Whoa! Sorry! Someone important needs my attention! Oh the finish line!” Just then the Happy Wheels victory music comes on and Water cheers. “YAAAAAY! HA HA HAAAA! Wait…. where’s my boyfriend? He’s not at the finish line.” Just then Water began to weep. “Oh that’s right! I’m all alone! Waaaaaaah haaaaaah!” Special thanks to Markiplier for this cutaway idea. Go watch his videos! He is AWESOME! The cutaway ends.
“Water, I’m not gonna allow Fonz to treat this way; now as your brother, I command you to break up with that son of a parent!” I demanded.
“I’m sorry, Flare, but this isn’t up to you. This is MY life and I choose however I want to choose it. If I’m going to be spending the rest of my life with some abuser then I decide that! I don’t want you to take control of my life! I’m your older sister!” Water yelled.
“THEN WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I NEEDED YOU?!” I yelled.
Water gasped. “Oh… this isn’t about Fonz is it? Oh… Flarey. You’re right. I left you alone in Mareami for my own well being. We were always there for eachother, but… I left you to deal with all the jerks.” Water explained as she began to feel bad. I didn’t say anything. I really didn’t know what I was saying, it just slipped out, but now I do realize it. Water was one of the closest things I had to a friend back in Mareami, along with my fish and Mare in the Moon, but Water and I were close.
“Oh Water…. You’re right. Maybe this isn’t about Fonz. Maybe I just… missed you so much.” I said.
“Well… I’m here now, Flarey, and I’m here to stay. Fonz and I were thinking of living here in Ponyville. I didn’t just come to Ponyville just to visit you. I came because….. I missed you.” Water said as she put her arm around me.
“I missed you too, Water. I mean, I less than three it here. I have my own pizza shop, all the friends I need, a heroic title, but I was missing my greatest friend of all….. my family.” I said as I teared up a bit.
“I won’t leave, Flare. We’re staying right here with you.” Water said.
“Water?” Fonz asked as he barged inside. “Pack your things, we’re leaving.”
“What?” Water asked.
“Why would he say that right after you said you’re staying?” I asked. “That is very cruel, man. Also, were you spying on us?”
“Doesn’t matter. We’re leaving.” Fonz said.
“But Fonz… we can’t leave. Flare needs me.” Water said.
“He has his friends, doesn’t he?” Fonz reminded her.
“He needs his loving older sister, Fonz. I will not leave him.” Water said.
“Ok, babe, if you say so. We’ll talk this over in the morning. Now get into this bedroom, and we’ll get some sleep.” Fonz instructed her.
“Ok, we’ll talk about this in the morning.” Water agreed. “Just as soon as Flare plays us a little something from his accordion.”
I smiled and squeed. “Very happy face! I thought you’d NEVER ask! Time to feel the power of polka! HA HAAAAA!” I went over to my accordion case and opened it up. “Aww yeah! Time to really rock this trailer out!” I took out my accordion, but it was all shattered and broken, but I didn’t notice yet.
“Whoa!” Water gasped as she looks at my accordion.
“I know! Isn’t my accordion swell? Now… a 1 and a 2 and a 1, 2, 3!” I began to play my broken accordion which was sounded like a nails screeching on a chalkboard. I didn’t notice yet, but I began singing, “Oh Water Gun, oh Water Gun, I would never live without you – Water Gun is the best sister around and here’s what we’re going to do…. We’re gonna run and skip and jump like a happy child - we’re gonna add a bunch of pics inside our pics folder - then post them on Facebook and tag the ponies that are not in it – then they delete their names so notifications won’t pig iiiiiiiiiit… their inboxes I meeeeeeean… and then I get pokes from Keith- HEY!” Just then, my accordion shatters into a bunch of pieces.
“WHAT IN THE WIZARD OF STRENGTH?!” I gasped.
“Oooh… pity.” Fonz said.
“NO! My accordion! The symbol that made me feel a lot like Weird Al… has shattered into a million pieces!” I said shockingly.
“Actually that looks more like a few hundred.” Fonz corrected me.
I then gasped. “Gasp! YOU! It was YOU!”
“What?” Fonz asked.
“YOU DID IT! YOU BROKE MY ACCORDION!” I yelled.
“Wha- no I didn’t!” Fonz corrected me.
“Well I know Water would never do such a thing and my fish wouldn’t either.” I said.
“Actually… I never liked that thing.” Piddles said.
“I did!” Darrel said excitedly.
“You like EVERYTHING, Darrel.” Piddles pointed out.
“You have violated the Roommate Agreement, Section 4, Paragraph 8… DON’T BREAK ANY OF MY STUFF!” I yelled.
“Whoa, Flare! I’m sure it was just an accident.” Water said.
“NO! Fonz is a terrible pony! He abuses you, he breaks my stuff, he even insulted my fish! That’s the worse type of pony around, even worse than Swinebutt!” I yelled.
“Flare, please, calm down!” Water instructed me.
“No, Water, this ends now. I want this pony out of my trailer and out of our lives!” I demanded as I pointed to Fonz.
“Flare… we’re a whole, Fonz and me. If you want Fonz out of your life, you’re saying you want me out of your life too. Is that correct? Do you want me out of your life too?” Water asked.
“NO! I’m doing this to protect you!” I yelled.
“Fonz is all the protection I need. I have made my decision. We will leave here tomorrow morning.” Water said.
“No, Water… please!” I begged.
“Fonz will not be a problem to you anymore.” Water said as she just walked out with her eyes closed and her head up high, but then she runs into the wall and hurts her nose. “Ow!” she said as she rubbed her nose and gave me a glare before she walked out. Fonz gave me an evil smirk before he followed her out.
"Sad face." I said. So I sadly walked over to my bed and flopped down on it face first.
"Hey, you did what you thought was right." Pearl said to me. "Yeah, she might be mad at you now, but she'll get over it."
"Pearl? It's no use." Rainbow said, putting his fin on her shoulder. "He can't understand us. Soon he will find out who is actually the true enemy here.
"You?" Darrel asked.
"No, but- Shut up, Darrel!" Rainbow said angrily, and Darrel chuckled. "As I was saying; Flare will be able to make Water believe that she's actually being abused. She just needs a little push and I think tomorrow will be the day it'll all happen."
“Really? Aww why tomorrow?” Darrel whined. “Tomorrow’s the day I’m watching that new Avatar episode.”
A cutaway shows Aang and his friend meeting with ‘the world’s greatest Bender’. “So let me get this straight,” Sokka started, “According to the sign up front, you’re the world’s greatest ‘bender’?”
“I’m not sure what this guy can teach Aang anything about bending.” Katara said.
“Listen, sweet cheeks,” Bender the robot said, “Fork over 500 samolians and I’ll teach cue-ball here how to bend puppies. Puppies made of metal that is… heh heh heeeeh.”
“The fire nation is going down!” Aang cried out in excitement.
“Yeah, whatever, buddy. Looks like it’s time for a drink.” Bender said as he takes out a few bottles.
“Oh how nice!” Aang said happily. Just then, Bender opens all of the bottles and starts drinking them all at once. He then throws them aside and burps.
“What sounds nice?” Bender asked. The cutaway ends.
Just then as I was still laying face first on my bed, the lights go out in my room.
"Oh great, the generator's out." Rainbow complained.
“How come Flare isn’t surprised?” Dorthey asked.
“He’s laying face-first on his bed, knit-wit.” Rainbow said to her.
“Don’t be so rude, Rainbow! I was only asking!” Dorthey complained.
"What's going on?" Darrel asked.
"HEY! What in the blue wizards are… LET GO OF ME!” I yelled.
"What's going on out there?" Dorthey asked.
"I dunno, I can't see a thing!" Piddles said. "Luckily, I don't even see that fish that mocks me. Yeah, get lost, jerk!”
"HELP! WATER! HELP!” I cried. I was shooting flares all around my room with my horn and the fish were able to see Fonz ponynapping me. "FISHIES! CALL FOR-" Fonz pinched my neck (I dunno how) and then I was knocked out.
"Your owner is coming with me!" Fonz said to the fish. "And there's nothing you can do to stop me! I never loved Water; I used her to get to Flare. My boss will love my achievement! I'll be off now." Fonz laughed evily. "Wait, did I just talk to those stupid fish? What is wrong with me?" Fonz puts me in a sack and carries me out of my trailer.
"Oh no!" Rainbow yelled.
“Wow… he’s carrying a sack and he doesn’t even say ‘ho, ho, ho’, or ‘alright you kiddies’.” Yoyo complained.
"There's no time for this! We gotta help Flare!" Rainbow said.
"How are we gonna do that?" Pearl asked.
Rainbow whistles out and then suddenly, a phoenix flies towards the trailer, but hits the window and falls over. Rainbow gave himself a facefin and he jumped out of the tank and opened the window. The phoenix came inside.
"You called?" the phoenix asked.
"Who's that?" Piddles asked.
"This is Apollo, Blaze's pet phoenix." Rainbow said.
"Blaze has a phoenix?" Piddles asked.
"Yeah, you don't remember him?" Rainbow asked.
"I was probably sleeping." Piddles said.
"You always sleep, Piddles." Yoyo said.
"Hey, Apollo!" Rainbow said to the phoenix.
"Hello, Rainbow! What is the nature of your call?" Apollo asked.
"This pony named Fonz Punkskull who is the coltfriend of Flare's sister Water has kidnapped Flare." Rainbow explained.
"No way!" Apollo said in shock.
"Yes way! We saw it!" Dorthey said.
"That would explain the flares fired all around the room." Apollo said.
"You need to get Flare's friends so they can rescue him!" Rainbow said.
"Thank you for telling me this, Rainbow." Apollo said.
"Hey Apollo, you're so cool!" Darrel said to him.
"Thank you, Darrel. Alright, I'll be off now." Apollo said. Apollo flies off into the night sky.
“How is he going to alert Flare’s friends?” Dorthey asked.
“He’s a phoenix, and Blaze has phoenix powers. Apollo says they can communicate. It’s probably the only chance of Flare being rescued. We can just hope for the best.” Rainbow explained.
Meanwhile, Apollo flies over to Blaze's house and wakes him up. "Huh? What?" Blaze asked. "What is it Apollo?"
“Master, Flare Gun has been taken captive by Fonz Punkskull.” Apollo explained.
“You couldn’t ask me to do this in the morning?” Blaze complained as he laid back down.
“But master!” Apollo tried to persuade Blaze.
“Yes, I heard you, Blaze has been taken captive by- HE’S BEEN TAKEN CAPTIVE BY FONZ PUNKSKULL?!” he yelled.
“Took you long enough.” Apollo mumbled.
“Thanks for telling me this, Apollo! I have to call up the Noble Six first!” Blaze yelled. “Oh, but wait, I need some caffeine first. I don’t feel fully awake yet.” Blaze walks over to his kitchen and makes himself a cup of coffee. Apollo follows him.
“But master, your friend may need your help now!” Apollo persuaded him.
“I know, but I need to feel more awaken first.” Blaze said as he pours himself the cup and drinks it.
“But master, you may never see him again!” Apollo said. Blaze then spits out the coffee in shock. “So you care now, huh?”
“What? Oh no, I always cared. I just remembered that I hate coffee.” Blaze said. Apollo sighs. So Blaze calls up Crystal, Psyche, Engie, and Aqua, and they all met up at town square.
"So let me get this straight; Flare has been kidnapped by Fonz?" Aqua asked.
"That's what Apollo said," Blaze said.
"I can't believe you can actually communicate with that thing." Crystal said.
"Me neither." Engie said.
"What are we gonna do?" Aqua asked.
"We gotta rescue him, duh!" Crystal said. “But first, I think I might need some coffee.”
"Well of course we’re going to rescue him, Crystal!” Psyche said in an obvious tone. “But the question still remains. I can understand he’s abusive to his sister, but why would he kidnap Flare? That doesn’t make much sense.”
"Well Apollo did say something about the fish saying that Flare wanted Fonz to leave and break up with Water, but Water became angry at him and then Fonz might have wanted revenge." Blaze said.
"But Blaze, don't you see? There is something weird going on with that stallion. Flare said his shop was attacked by robots earlier today." Psyche said. "I think Fonz may have something to do with them."
“Also, Flare did say somethin’ about a familiar logo on the robots; a black circle with a red ‘S’.” Engie said.
“That’s the symbol of the mysterious doctor.” Aqua said.
“The same symbol that we saw when the Mane Six were kidnapped and taken to Chaos Mountain?” Crystal asked. “Or maybe I just might be thinking of a Teen Titans fanfic character.”
"So this is starting to make sense. It appears Flare's sister has a coltfriend that actually works for the pony that almost freed Discord and nearly doomed Equestria." Psyche said.
"Psyche, you're a genius!" Crystal said.
"Well I wouldn't say a genius, that's a pretty strong word, Crystal. But thanks!" Psyche said.
“Trust me, I didn’t wanna say it either.” Crystal said.
“Way to spoil the moment.” Psyche rolled his eyes.
"Y’all have any idea where he might have taken Flare?" Engie asked.
“We have to spread out, search the entire town for him. We have to find him before Fonz does something awful to him…. or his sister.” Blaze said.
“Well in that case, we better get movin’.” Aqua said.
“Ok, Aqua, you search the south end of town; Crystal, you search the north; Psyche, east; Engie west; and I’ll search around the center and the skies.” Blaze instructed them.
“Aww, why do you have to search more areas than us?” Crystal complained.
So the Noble Six began to search the town for me. I have no idea why though, and to be honest, I didn't even know they were going after me because I was with Fonz at the Ponyville Warehouse. I was tied onto a chair, and there was a little ring on my horn to prevent me from using magic; I then suddenly woke up many hours later. The room was completely dark, except for the light that's shining on top of me.
"Ugggh, what happened?" I asked. "This isn't my house." I looked up and saw the spotlight that was facing down towards me. "Oh, this must be a play. I guess I have to sing. What's my part?"
"Your part is to sit there quietly and tell us what we need to know." a voice that sounded like Fonz said.
"Well how can I sit here quietly AND tell you what you need to know, dum dum?" I asked.
"Keep making smart-plot comments like that and it'll be the last thing you'll do." Fonz said, but he was in the darkness so I couldn't see him.
"Well there's still so much I have to do, so fine." I said. "Fonz is that you?"
"No, it's your mom." he said.
"You don't sound like her. Whatever. Hi mom!" I said.
"You're really stupid, aren't you?" he asked.
"No, I'm just spreading the lulz. I can stop if I want to. I just choose to keep doing this." I said.
"Well, so far, I'm not laughing." he said.
"Well who said you needed to be the one to lawl? I could be amusing myself or anypony else that's in this room." I said.
"Well you had your fun. Now tell me what I need to know and your sister will be fine." he said.
"Well... wait a sec that was fourth time we started a sentence with the word 'well'." I said.
"Well... wait, what? SHUT UP!" he yelled.
"Sigh. I apologize for saying that stuff to you last night. I just didn't want to see my sister be tortured and pushed around anymore. No offense, right?" I asked.
"This isn't about that." he said.
"Well, then what is this about?" I asked. “Oh dang, I said ‘well’ again.”
"I was never really in love with your sister. I just used her to get to you." he said.
"Well you can just visit my shop; you don't need to date my sister to see me." I said. "Wait, you never loved my sister? YOU USED HER?!"
Fonz laughed evily. "Of course I did! Who cares? I'm only loyal to my boss, the doctor."
"The doctor? Did you send those robots to attack my shop?" I asked.
"Yes, yes I did." he said.
"You know, it's not easy running a shop. Making a complete mess didn't help either." I said.
"We're trying to ruin you, you know." he said.
"Why?" I asked.
"Because the doctor knew you before you moved here, so he wants his revenge." he said.
"Revenge for what? What did I do? I don't even know anypony by the name ‘Doctor’. Except for Doctor Who." I said. "Wait, I don't work for the Master, I swear!"
"We know you don't. This isn't a television series you know." Fonz reminded me.
"Or is it?" I asked snarly.
"No, it's not." he said.
"Oh. Sad face." I said. "Well, who's this doctor I keep hearing about anyway?"
"That's none of your concern." he said.
“I know some ponies that had a grudge on me in the past. I know a few that became doctors, but I dunno which one.” I said. “But since you said they have a grudge on me, it is my concerned. Since I moved into Ponyville, this doctor tried to destroy my business, and my life. The robotic Trixie, Chrysalis at the Nashorse race, Boorlie Pomodoro disguising himself as Health Inspector Jones, and let’s not forget the biggest plan of all – turning me into something I’m not…. a monster.”
"Well you ruined his life. Now he wants something back." Fonz said.
"Ruined his life? Bro, I didn't ruin any lives back in Mareami! Ponies were ruining MINE!" I cried.
"You may not realize it, but you ruined alot of lives back in Mareami, or so he said." Fonz said.
"Like you're ruining my sister's life?" I asked.
"I'll make you eat those words." He said angrily.
"Yeah, I'm pretty hungry for breakfast." I said. Just then, Fonz walked towards me, and went into the light so I can see him. He was taking off his jacket and his shirt. "HOLY WIZARD OF HOPE! NO! I'm not interesting in stallions!" After he took off his jacket and shirt, it showed a big red S on his stomach. "Oh... you were just gonna show me the S. I'm still wondering what that S means."
"Now, show me that belly button." he said.
"What? What are you gonna do with it?" I asked.
"I'm gonna poke it many times." he said.
"For Wizard of Feeling's sake! NO! Not my belly button! Everypony who knows me knows not to touch my belly button! I don't like anypony touching my belly button!" I yelled.
"That's what the doctor said." Fonz said with an evil smile; then he chuckled. I started screaming as he was poking my belly button. The Noble Six were hearing my screaming from the outside.
"Hey, did you mates hear that?" Aqua asked.
"I heard screamming." Psyche said.
"Oh snap! That must be Flare!" Crystal yelled. “Wow, the was the first time I said ‘oh snap’ in a while.”
"C'mon!" Blaze yelled. The Noble Six reached the warehouse and tried to open the garage door, but couldn't get it opened.
"It's locked." Aqua said.
"No duh." Engie said obviously.
"We gotta find a way inside. Flare is counting on us!" Crystal said. “Except we don’t have any numbers on us. Maybe he’s writing numbers on a paper on us. Most likely our backs. Our backs are more like tables than anything else on our bodies.”
“How are we going to get inside?” Aqua asked.
"Watch and learn, guys." Psyche said as he flew to the top of the warehouse near an air vent. "Well what do you know! An air vent. What a surprise." he said sarcastically.
"How did you know there was a vent up there, Psyche?" Crystal asked.
"For every locked building, there is always an air vent somewhere. There is always a way inside." Psyche said as Blaze and Crystal flew up with Psyche onto the roof.
"Hey what about us?" Engie asked.
"Yeah, we don't have wings like you mates." Aqua said.
"Just wait down there and we'll get the door opened." Psyche said.
"Don’t take too long." Engie said.
Blaze opened the air vent, and the three pegasi snuck inside, and saw me being tortured by Fonz. "Stop touching my belly button!" I yelled.
"Sure, sure. I have some unfinished business with your sister anyway. The doctor will take care of you." Fonz said.
"What are you gonna do to Water?" I asked him angrily.
"Oh nothing really, just... gonna get married." he said and chuckled. I just looked at him with an annoyed look. "What? You not scared?"
"She's not gonna accept." I said.
"What? Fool. She already accepted." he said.
"When?" I asked.
"Last night." he said.
I didn't say anything, but I was left with a shocking look in my face. Just then I glared at him. “No she didn’t.”
"Yes she did. I'm gonna go pick her up, and we'll be heading somewhere to get married." he said.
"Where?" I asked.
"Not saying. If I told you then you might have a chance to save her. Which you won't anyway, not with you stuck here." Fonz said. He chuckles again. "And the way you treated her last night, she won’t miss you! Farewell! The doctor will be here to pick you up soon." Fonz continued chuckling and left the warehouse. I just sat there, not saying or doing anything. Psyche, Blaze, and Crystal walked up to me just after Fonz left.
"Wow, I never thought I would see you this quiet." Psyche said. "This must be some serious business."
"Nah, I just knew you were there.” I said.
"How did you know?" Crystal asked.
"Only Blaze would breathe smoke from his nose. I smelled the smoke." I said.
"It's true." Blaze said. "Unless it's Spike."
"But Spike left for the Crystal Empire." I said. "Now untie me and get this anti-magic thing off my horn, please?" Blaze untied me and Psyche took the anti-magic ring off my horn, but do I have to say that? I guess so.
"You alright, buddy?" Blaze asked.
"Don't worry, it's kay." I said.
"So you heard, huh?" Blaze asked.
"Heard what?" I asked.
"That Fonz was only using Water?" Blaze asked.
"Uh huh." I said.
"You don't seem to feel that angry." Psyche said.
"Because I'm not that surprised face, Psyche. I kinda figured that something like this was gonna happen." I said. "I didn't trust that dude one bit."
"So what's the plan now?" Crystal asked.
"Well first I want some breakfast." I said.
"You're not gonna want to rescue your sister?" Blaze asked.
"But I'm gonna need the energy to rescue her. Breakfast, the most important meal of the day! Serve it up, Noble Six way! Praise the Wizards!" I yelled.
"Okay, fine. Where do you wanna go?" Blaze asked. So we all ended up eating at Denny’s.
“Ah, Denny’s! Such a wonderful place to have breakfast! The second best place!” Crystal said.
“What’s the first?” Aqua asked.
“Cracker Barrel.” Crystal said.
“I always thought of that restaurant as a BBQ place.” Aqua said.
"Oh, by the way, thanks for not opening the garage door for us and missin’ all the action." Engie said sarcastically.
"Fonz was still in the room. We couldn't summon you without him noticing." Blaze said.
"And what action? All we did is see Fonz torture Flare." Crystal reminded him.
"It was the torture ah wanted to see.” Engie said.
"So how did you brahs know where I was?" I asked.
"Well Apollo said your fish said you were kidnapped." Blaze said. "So..."
"Yeah, umm, who’s that?” I asked.
“My pet phoenix.” Blaze said.
"You never mentioned him before, like…. ever.” I reminded him.
“Yeah.” Blaze agreed.
"But still, awww. I knew my fish would come to save the day! I should thank them when I get home." I said.
"Wait, what about us? You didn't thank us for the rescue." Crystal complained.
"Oh you're my friends, you don't need a thanks from me. Just a group hug!" I said.
"I think I'd rather go with a thank you, if you don't mind?" Aqua asked.
"How about both?" I asked.
"Meh.” Aqua shrugged.
“Soooo… were you brahs up all night?” I asked.
Engie yawned. “Pretty much.”
“Sorry, brahs. I didn’t want to be an inconvenience.” I said.
“It’s ok, man.” Blaze said. “You were in trouble, and Fonz is trouble.”
“Or I was trouble and Fonz was in trouble.” I teased.
“Isn’t that the same thing?” Blaze asked.
“No, you didn’t listen. I switched it around.” I reminded him.
“Ah.” Blaze nodded.
“You get it?” I asked.
“I do!” Blaze said. “Anyways we seemed to be finished with our meals. You ready to go find Water?”
"Sure! Let's go!" I said.
“Wait, I think I have to use the bathroom.” Aqua said.
“One or two?” Engie asked.
“Is that any of ya’re concerned?” Aqua asked.
“Just sayin’, don’t trust public restrooms.” Engie said.
“Ya got a point. I’ll just go when I get to Flare’s.” Aqua said.
So we all walked to my trailer. I saw the security system wasn't completely online because Water knows to secure my trailer when she leaves, that's what I do. "It doesn't look like the security system is completely online. They must still be here."
"So we ready to kick this user's plot?" Crystal asked.
"Actually... I'm gonna go in by myself. This is my personal issue; my family is at stake here. I'll take care of Fonz alone." I said.
"But Flare, you can't do this alone! He looks like he's stronger than you. You'll need the help!" Blaze suggested.
Aqua put his hoof on Blaze's shoulder. "Blaze, let Flare handle this on his own."
"Can we at least record it and put it on YouTube?" Engie asked, holding a video camera.
"Sure! No problemo, brah! Everypony loves a good fight." I said.
"Try not to fight right away, Flare. Try reasonin’ with him first." Aqua suggested.
"That's what I'm planning to do.” I said.
“Also I can use your bathroom, right?” Aqua asked.
“Of course.” I nodded.
"Good luck, partner!" Engie said
"If you need us, we'll be out here waiting." Blaze said. I nodded and Aqua and I went inside my trailer. There was panting and grunting coming from my room.
“Hold still, Water, and nopony gets hurt.” Fonz said from the other room.
"Flare, HELP!" Water cried. I burst inside my room and Fonz was holding on to Water tight. Water was trying to break free but couldn’t.
"Water!” I gasped.
"Well, well, well! I didn't think you'd be able to get free so quickly." Fonz said as he chuckled. "You're just in time to see us off. Who’s this?” he looks over at Aqua.
“Sorry, I’m just here to use the bathroom.” Aqua said as he steps into my lavatory and closes the door.
"You mean to see YOU off, Fonz?” I asked him. “Because Water is staying right here with me. You on the other hoof, better hit the road jack, and don't you come back no more, no more, no more, no more."
"I ain't leaving without my prize!" Fonz said.
"Flare! You were right! You were right all along!" Water cried.
"Shut it! You're gonna be my new bride, Water Punkskull!" he said and chuckled.
"Seriously?" I asked. "Water Punkskull? Doesn't seem to be a good combination."
"Step out of my way, Flare Gun!" he yelled.
"Sure thing, just let go of Water." I said.
"How about, if you don't move away, I'll pour chlorine into your fish tank." he said holding a bottle of chlorine water.
"But that stuff will kill them!" I cried.
"No Flare, don't!" Darrel yelled. "We have so much to live for!"
"We've been living with him for years. Who knows how long we'll be alive for?" Rainbow reminded him.
"What do you doing, Fonz? Those are my fish! You can't kill poor defenseless fish!" I yelled.
"Do you love your fish more than me, Flare?" Water asked.
"I love you both equal, but at least chlorine can't kill you." I said.
"If you know what's best for you and your fish, you'd better step out of my way!" Fonz ordered.
"Flare, don't let him take me!" Water begged.
"Don't worry, I won't." I said winking to Rainbow.
"Why's he winking at you, Rainbow?" Dorthey asked. Then Rainbow gives out a whistle.
"Then say good-night to your fish." Fonz said evilly, almost pouring the chlorine into the tank.
"FLARE NO!" Pearl yelled.
"Did he completely lose his mind?!" Yoyo yelled. "Flare would never throw our lives away like that!"
Just then, Apollo (Blaze's phoenix if you don't remember) flies into my room and slaps the chlorine right out of Fonz’s magic grip and it spills all over the floor.
"Oh wait to go Apollo! Now I have to clean that up!" I complained. Just then Apollo shrugs and lands himself right on the fish tank.
“I will protect you, my aquatic friends.” Apollo said.
“I love this phoenix already!” Darrel said excitedly.
Fonz gets really angry at me and even blows out steam. "Alright Flare Gun, it seems you can't take a hint. It looks like I'll have to finish you personally!" Fonz yelled.
"Come at me bro! My body is ready!" I yelled. “Wow… just…. Wow.”
"You're gonna regret saying that." Fonz said.
“Yeah, I pretty much did.” I said.
"Fonz, don't do this!" Water yelled.
"Shut it, you're no better!" he yelled at her as he slapped her across the face.
“OUCH! That hurt! I can file a lawsuit against you for that!” Water yelled.
“GASP!” I gasped. I started to get super angry now. If I wasn’t angry before…. wait, I was angry before, why am I saying that? “Ok Fonz, I gave you a chance, but that assault just crosses the line! You mess with my sister….. you mess with me!”
"Sure no problem. Bring it on!" he said. I started doing karate poses and making karate sounds, but then Fonz shoots a big laser blast from his horn, which made me fly through my hallway then I fly out my trailer and hit a pile of trash cans across the street. Catsgroove by Parov Stelar started playing in the background while I was laying on the pile of trash with my eyes rolling around my sockets. I shook my head and regained my senses and then I saw Crystal playing that song on her iPod.
"Thanks for the music, Crystal." I said.
"Sorry, I thought it was perfect for the timing." Crystal said.
"Yes it was. Now play... Everyone was Kung Fu Fighting." I said.
"Oh I don't have that song, but I do have Eye of the Tiger." Crystal said.
"Nah. I’m planning that for chapter 17. Play Chateau by Rob Dogan.” I suggested.
"Okay." she said, and turns the song on in the radio. Fonz bursts outside and sees me.
"GET UP!" he ordered me.
"Oh I'll teach that punk a lesson!" Blaze yelled. Then Aqua put his hoof in front of Blaze, blocking him.
"No. This is between brother and coltfriend." Aqua said.
"This is gonna be darn tootin entertainin’!" Engie said, recording all that's going on.
I stood up with my horn glowing. "Three hits, that's all I need. Game over. Just telling you now." I said. "Me hitting you, you hitting the floor, and me kicking your flank out of town!"
"Kicks and hits aren't the same thing, partner." Engie corrected me.
"Hush!" Psyche shushed him.
I activate my hornsaber, which is one of my magic spells. It's really just a baseball bat, but it glows and it looks like a lightsaber, and it's on my horn. Did I tell you that? I forgot. I keep taking breaks while I type this story down; I have a life you know.
"It's gonna be like that, huh?" Fonz asked. He activates his hornsaber too, which is red, when mine is blue.
"What's your special talent?" I asked.
"My cutie mark is a skull, which means death, and I can do any magic spells that mean hurting you really bad!" he said.
"Let's bring it around town, Fonzie! Bring it around town!" I said as I spun my waist around. Fonz charges to me and we start having a hornsaber battle. Every time I hit his hornsaber, I go: "Then we do this... and this... and this... and this, and that, and this, and that, and this, and that, and then..." I knocked Fonz over and I was about to whack him with my saber, but then I said, "Oh poo, I don't have any bubbles to blow.” Fonz kicked me, which pushed me out of his way, and he stood up and we continued to use our hornsabers against eachother. It's pretty much of an even fight, but then shortly after, he poked me in the belly button. "Ow! I told you, not the belly button!" Then Fonz whacked his saber across my face. Yeah he caught me off guard. He kept whacking me and I fell on the ground with a bruised face, and I even had a black eye.
Fonz starts to chuckle again. "Give up, and I'll take you to the doctor, not in a full body cast." he said.
I weakly, stood up. "Hey Fonz, guess what?" I asked.
"What?" he asked.
"RAIL BLAST!" I yelled as I then used my rail blast spell to push him real far, and he hit a building wall, which even cracked.
"OW!" he cried.
"And for my grand finale..." I started while my horn starts glowing, attempting to use my SHOOP DA WHOOP spell on him. "IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZ..." But before I could finish, he fires another laser blast from his horn, and it pushes me towards another building wall and my spell fails.
"The doctor did say something about your laser spell. Yeah, not gonna work, buddy." he said. I was sitting against the wall, all bruised up, and stars were floating on top of my head, like really, since I'm in a cartoon universe. "Time to finish you off!"
"FLARE! USE YOUR ARMOR LOCK!" Aqua yelled.
"What am I, a Pokemon? Don't tell me what to do!" I complained.
Fonz starts to chuckle. Blaze started to get impatient. "Now can I help him?" he asked.
"I suppose so." Aqua said.
"Not so fast!" Water yelled exiting my trailer, wiping the tears off her face. "I think it's time we finally broke up!" she yelled at him. Then the Noble Six started cheering.
"Woo hoo! Way to stick it up to him, Water!" Psyche yelled.
"You go girl that sounds similar to me!" Crystal yelled.
"I'm sorry, babe. I didn't hear what you said. I dare you to say it to me again!" Fonz threatened her, while walking towards her.
"You and I... are breaking up!" she said angrily.
"That's what I thought you said." Fonz said. "Well if you don't want to marry me, then I guess I'll have to force you!" he yelled.
"Over Psyche's dead body!" Crystal yelled.
Psyche gave Crystal a concerned look. "Really, Crystal? Really?"
"Take back what you said, Water! NOW!" Fonz ordered.
"No! I'm tired of you telling me what to do! I'm not your toy! I'm not your slave! I was your marefriend! Not anymore though. I should've known better then to listen to you!" Water yelled at him. She then looked at me and said, "And I should've listened to my brother!"
"Yeah, you should've." I said as I was still hurt on the ground.
“But Water, you need me. Without me, you’ll be alone forever! Nopony else will ever love you!” Fonz yelled.
“If that’s the way it’s going to be, then so it shall be. I’d rather be alone than hurt!” Water said.
"If that's how it's gonna be, then so be it!" Fonz yelled at her. Fonz fired a laser blast at her but then Water activated her horn and used a shield made of Water to protect herself. Water started walking towards Fonz, glaring at him. Fonz continued firing at her, but started to get nervous.
"Wow... that mare... is amazin’." Aqua said. Fonz stopped firing as he reached the wall and got really nervous. Then Water's horn started to glow. "Time to put out the fire!” she yelled as suddenly water bursts out of her horn. So much water came out of her horn, it was like a huge wave, and it splashes all over Fonz. Fonz started coughing and spitting. Water continued to fire water at him for a few seconds, and then she gave it a rest. Fonz was laying on the ground, all wet, and continued coughing and spitting water out of his mouth. Water walked towards me and gave me her hoof. I smiled and let her take it, and she helped me up. We both walked towards Fonz with angry looks on our faces.
"Lawl, you’re all wet.” I said to Fonz.
"Listen, buddy!" Water said putting her hoof on Fonz's chest. "This is our town! Ponyville is not a town for jerks. This is a peaceful town, filled with peaceful ponies that wish to be in peace!"
"Try saying that, 3x fast.” Crystal teased as she elbowed Psyche.
"So if you know what's good for you, you'd leave town, and... never come back." Water said to him with tears in her eyes.
"And tell your friend the doctor that if he ever sends others to do his biddings, we'd be willing to challenge them. Until then, he's such a chicken for not just facing me himself." I said.
"Do we make ourselves clear?" Water asked him. "Because, if you ever come back, you'll be dealing with all of us. Not just Flare and I." Fonz remained silent. "DO WE MAKE OURSELVES CLEAR?!" she yelled at him.
"Yes, ma'am! I hear you loud and clear. I'm sorry for the trouble and I promise I'll never come back!" Fonz said as he stood up in fear.
I then leaned over to Fonz and whispered to him, "Now this is the part where you run away." Fonz ran into my trailer, got his bags, and ran out of town, screaming like a little girl, and that was the end of Fonz Punkskull and his abusing. There could be no greater disappointment than a pony who thinks that he or she is the top of their relationship.
"Wow Water, that was amazing." Aqua said to her.
"Yeah, I'll say! Way to stand up to that jerk!" Psyche said impressively.
"Thanks!" Water said to them.
"Ah got the whole thing." Engie said as he turned off his video camera.
"You can edit that right?" Crystal asked him.
"Sure can!" Engie said.
"Yeah, I agree. Well done, Water. Well done!" Blaze said.
"Thank you!" Water said. Then she turned towards me.
"Look Water, I have ketchup coming out of my nose!" I said and laughed.
Water chuckled. "I see, bro. I see." Then Water had a sad look on her face and started to tear up again.
"What's wrong, sis?" I asked.
"Flarey, I'm so sorry. I didn't know Fonz was such a jerk. I thought he just had a bad temper, but it turned out he was only using me." Water said as she looked down and began to weep. “All this time… who could ever love a pony like me?”
"Hey, Water. It's not your fault." I said holding her chin. "I should've been there for you when you needed me most. I should've called you more and gave you advise before you started a relationship. I was so caught up in my shop, and the Noble Six, I just seem to forget who was there for me back at home. That one pony who knew how I felt. That one pony that always cuddled me every time I was sad. The old Mama Fluttershy. You're my sister, and I less then three you so much, Water. You'll always be my sister." Water smiled, and then she gave me a big hug. I hugged her back.
"Awwww." Crystal said with tears in her eyes. “Such a happy moment.”
"Shut up! I don't like it when ponies say 'awww' while I'm having a moment." I complained.
"Sorry." She said.
“But Flare…. without Fonz, I’m single again.” Water said.
“Water… you were always single.” I said.
“How does that help me?” she asked.
“You’ll find the right pony one day, I guarantee it.” I said.
“But what about you, Flare?” Water asked. “Don’t you want to be in a relationship?”
“Someday I will, but for now, I’d rather just stick to my friends and my work.” I said. “But the real question is this… what are you going to do? I won’t stand in your way. The choice is yours and yours alone.”
"Well, my traveling is done. I have nowhere else to go. My budget is limited, and I have no idea what to do now.” Water said.
“Stay with me, Water. Not only do you need me, I need you.” I said. “I have all my friends here, but what’s the use of all that when I can’t have my family? The family, one of the first friends you have ever.”
“I hope I won’t be too much for you, bro.” Water said.
“Trust me; it gets lonely when it’s just me and the fish. Stay in my guest bedroom, and stay for as long as you want.” I offered.
“Flare, you are the best brother a mare can ever have.” She said as she hugged me again. Just then, my walkie talkie starts ringing.
"This is Flare, over." I said in the walkie talkie.
"What the hay, Flare?!" Scootaloo yelled.
"What the hay what, over?" I asked.
"Shut up! We've been washing dishes for Taco Shack, all because of your personal problem!" she yelled.
"Because of what, over?" I asked.
"You owe us big time! I hope you're happy!" Scootaloo yelled in the walkie talkie.
"Hope you're happy what, Scoots, over?" I asked. Just then Scootaloo was standing right there next to me and she threw the walkie talkie on my head. “OW!”
"OVER!" she yelled.
Crystal was playing Catsgroove again on her radio while my eye lids were rolling around my sockets again. "Hey, I see colorful rainbows." I said.
"Oh dear Luna, he's delusional!" Aqua said.
"I don't think he is. Look!" Blaze said pointing at the aurora borealis from the Crystal Empire, after Spike and Cadance saved the day over there, since this takes place about the same time as then. We all looked and saw the pretty colors. I put my arm around Water and just watched the show. When the Mane Six and Spike got back, they told me all about their adventure, and I told them about mine, but of course they couldn't stay along, because of Twilight's test.
So, Water is now living with me. I mean, yeah, it is weird for siblings to live with each other at a full-grown age, but we needed each other. Later that night, Water and I went into our individual bedrooms, laid down, turned off the lights and were about to go to sleep, but before we did, Water started talking to me through the wall. “Hey, Flare?”
“Yeah, Water?” I asked.
“If you could be any animal in the whole world, what animal would you be?” she asked.
“A cat, I think I choose cat.” I said.
“Why?” she asked.
“Because I like living inside and sleep on couches.” I said. “Most ponies let their cats live inside and sleep on couches.”
“How about a dog? Ponies let dogs live inside and sleep on couches.” Water pointed out.
“I don’t like dogs.” I said. “I wouldn’t wanna go around being afraid of myself.”
“Good point.” Water agreed.
“Why? What animal would be if you can pick one in the whole world?” I asked.
“I was gonna say monkey, but you make a good point about the couch.” Water said. I nodded in agreement. After a few moments of silence, Water said, “Well, good night, Flare.”
“Good night, Water.” I said as we both went to sleep.